Nostalgia Critic - Jurassic Park

(462 votes, average 4.40 out of 5)
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Comments (494)
  • idodo15
    good video
  • leikaitsndead
    Doug, I am glad you were easy on Jurassic Park, and it's also my childhood film too. My memories on this film isn't too perfect to recall but what I can remember on top of my head is I went to see this film at a theatre place called Ontario Place (I'm from Toronto, Ontario of Canada), particularly called Ontario Place Cinesphere Theatre.

    If there's anyone on this site (from Toronto, Canada) knows what's a Ontario Place Cinesphere is knows what I'm trying to say, and to say the least it's where Jurassic Park played at the time - for the main event about a movie that has moving and breathing dinosaurs. It didn't disappoint anyone, including myself. It was amazing night back then.

    I know that as time continues to pass, the film will be facing of people that'll call this movie outdated and silly and "inaccurate". Well sure, it's simply because at the time studies about the existence about dinosaurs is still continuing to this day and there'll be rights and wrongs about them. For me, whatever the cause, the movie is a experience that I think everyone should enjoy and be proud to be a part of that experince when Jurassic Park first came out.

    Thanks for the video Doug.

    PS: By the way Doug, THANK YOU for pointing out about the cartoonish sound effect! I knew it was one, even as a kid I can notice the noise!
  • Moreno X  - to leikaitsndead
    Hey jerk-face, learn to post your own comments instead of copy-and-paste someone's else posts. Very unoriginal you would pull as people will notice that you aren't the first posters on this page of the comment sectiion as they will clearly see you posted as you're replying. What a lame way to be posted on the first page for everyone to read my posted comments where you got them from the third page of the section.

    You should pad yourself in the back for being an unoriginal douche just so you be one of the "first posters" of the site that no one cares about that. Good job.
  • melongod
    You sound mad! I havent heard "jerk-face" since the 4th grade!
  • Moreno X  - to melongod
    Yeah, well.....I don't curse (it gives these guys too much attention and such). And no I'm not mad, just.....I'm an unimportant user of the site that, for some reason, someone copy and paste my comments to be posted in the front page of the section. I never thought this would happen to all. What a relief.

    Kinda felt like....honored(?). Yeah I suppose you're right. Still, not mad. Surprised? Yes.
  • Moreno X  - To Divide By Zero
    In the words of NC:


    And what do I think about leikaitsndead stealing my writing and posting here from the third page of the comment section just to be "first"?

  • NixWolf
    Da fuck?
  • Simon Callahan
    I remember Jurassic Park playing at the Ontario Place Cinesphere. It was playing on an IMAX screen before showing movies on IMAX was popular. Granted, it wasn't shown in the IMAX aspect ratio (the 3D re-release fixed that), but I remember seeing the trailer on the Cinesphere screen and being awed by it.

    Speaking of IMAX, I did see the 3D re-release in IMAX, and it was amazing. It actually made the movie more intense. Just thought I'd throw that in.

    Also, the "cartoonish sound effect" is not what everyone thinks it is. Nedry is holding onto the winch on the front of the car. When he slips, he takes the winch with him, causing it to make a "zip" sound.
  • Moreno X  - To Simon Callahan
    Thank you very much :) I'm glad there's people who remembers watching Jurassic Park at Ontario Place Cinesphere Theatre besides me.

    Oh and Simon Callahan, the reason why I'm responding to you instead leikaitsndead is because my comments were posted earlier than him and he decided to copy and paste my comments and posted here just so everyone sees him as a first poster. Nice.

    But thank you for sharing and I like to thank leikaitsndead for bringing my comments here from the third page of the comment section AND posting my writing without crediting me. So happy that it was worth it.

    So Simon Callahan, again, thank you. :)
  • ShiversTheNinja
    Wow. Copying someone else's comment? You were THAT desperate to get a comment on the front page that quickly? I mean, it's bad enough to reply to the first comment just to get your comment high up there, but to not even take the time to write your own comment just makes it SO much worse. Now I'm going to judge the hell out of you any time I see a comment from you. Have fun with that legacy!
  • Kaedus
    Completely agree. I remember seeing this 5 times in theatres. My city(Kamloops, B.C) even had it playing a year later in matinees. Epic for the time.
  • ThePinkKirby
    I would've been totally fine with him tearing it apart (it's not a part of my childhood, and I am generally not disturbed by my "childhood being ruined"), but the movie (despite its flaws) isn't really BAD.
  • LikaLaruku
    Puhahaahah! The explosion 35 seconds in scared the fuckbajesus out of my cats.

    Kinda liked it as a kid. As an adult, all I see is continuity/editing errors & historical inaccuracies.

    Wait...Didn't you already review this in February of 2011? ::Checks:: My bad, that was the first sequel.

    Heheheh, Goldbloom is like a skinny Johhny cage with a speech impediment & no fighting skills.

    CG still looks great for as old as it is; more believable than a lot of new bigger budgeted movies.
  • Zorro4k6
    I'm basically the same way. I still love the film, but now that I know how to make them, I could spend the whole movie just pointing out bad edits and etc. But that's not what I want to do. I just want to enjoy a good film. Does Jurassic Park have it's flaws? Yes. But as a whole it doesn't really take away from the awesome effects and the adventure of the story. This really is, one of the best films of all time.

    Side note, I think HISHE did the best parody of this movie. "What does "lolz" mean?" Haha.

    Why is that T-Rex song so catchy? I can't get it out of my head. Oh well, it was a pretty cool song.
  • CronoT
    There's actually some very interesting and somewhat sad reasons for the CGI in this one still standing out today.

    This movie used a hybrid of stop-motion and CGI for the dinosaur special effects. It was something pioneered by Spielberg and Stan Winston, but it turned out to be too costly for most productions, so it wasn't replicated.

    It involved old school stop-motion figurines with computer sensors tied into them. It was actually a very basic form of what became motion capture.
  • BigMac90
    Good review. It wasn't one of my favourites, but I still found it enjoyable. The funniest part was Rachel voicing the Raptors! :lol:
    The T-Rex joke did get kinda old though...

    Jurassic Park has its flaws, but it's still one of my favourite movies of all time.
    (And if I'm gonna be honest, I actually like Jurassic Park 3...)

    By the way, has anyone seen this site? library/jurassicflubs/
  • TacTic  - T-Rex joke
    Yeah I agree with ya on the T-Rex joke. I understand the meme(ability?) of the song, but it kinda ruined the mood that the original music, or lack there of, established.

    Maybe if it was mixed a bit better with the original audio or Doug's voice didn't drown everything out, but it got old quick.
  • Lonny
    ". . . and I ATE THAT BITCH!!!"
  • irishgirl
    I completely agree with you!
  • Frogga
    i freaking loved this one. of course i was a kid and i was hyped because of the special effects. and yes: jeff goldblum sucks in this one. what kind of scientis is his charakter?
  • Kooshmeister
    A mathematician specializing in Chaos Theory. His presence in the film isn't well explained, but in the book he was hired by the investors to figure out how, why and in what ways the park could fail.
  • Frogga
    well, this makes sence.
  • rozola
    I thought Jeff Goldblum was the best character in the movie, tbh.

    Come to think of it, I think he might have been my first crush too. I'm surprised Doug didn't mention the pointlessness of the scene where Goldblum is randomly posing with his shirt open.
  • WesleyFoxx
    "Wizard of Uhs" might be the most magnificent description of Goldblum ever.
  • just2good
    Very interesting choice for a movie.
  • Infinite Scratch
    at start: WELL lets see what he has to say about this one

  • Fantasiaxylie
    I'll always love this movie. It was such a big part of my childhood.
  • Zeebis
    I actually surprisingly saw this for the first time last year.
  • Proxy013  - 3D quality
    I don't know about anyone else, but the 3D quality in my theater was AWFUL for this movie. The spotlights seemed to confuse the "3D software" that they used, it made the dark scenes too dark, and it messed with the faces. I was expecting backwards conversion 3D quality, where it's not as "deep" as say, Avatar or other films that were filmed with 3D in mind, but this was just atrocious. Like I said, maybe it was just my theater, and I thought several times about leaving, but when the 3D got it right, it was great, so I stayed. Anyone else experience something similar?
  • Cassmi
    Why leave in the middle of something you paid for? It's not like the cinema will give a flying f**k and it just has a tantrum-esque vibe to it. I'm sure there will be a flood of feedback if this was a common experience.
  • HeartBurnKid
    Why stay if you're not enjoying yourself? That is what you're paying for, after all -- to enjoy yourself.

    And quietly getting up and leaving is, in no way, shape, or form, a "tantrum".
  • rozola
    I don't know about a regular 3D screening, but the 3D was pretty impressive on Imax. It didn't have that weird cardboard-cutout look that a lot of movies have when they are converted to 3D. (though the scene where Alan and Tim need to climb down the tree to escape the car was blurry as hell. The 3D didn't seem to like any close-up shots of leaves).
  • alexalberto81  - 3D is a gimmicky fad...
    If I can avoid it, I will not pay to see a movie in 3D... to me, it never looks right when converted and, even if it was shot in 3D, it's always a hit and miss. I basically skipped this movie in 3D altogether... I'll pop in the DVD and watch it on my TV before I cough up $15 to see it in a format that it wasn't meant for.
  • mrsdewees
    I actually really enjoyed it in 3D which is strange for me because I avoid 3D movies like the plague (the movies MADE for 3D tend to make me almost motion sick from all the awfulness). However, since this movie wasn't initially shot with the intention of 3D, it was easy to watch. I also really wanted to see the movie in theaters. I didn't have a problem with it though. I'm thinking it was your cinema.
  • Dogmatix
    Nice review as always :) !
  • Vincent
    A good review for a good film

    And other kinds of generic responses just to be on the first page of the comments.....
  • Tenkaiechi
    Aperture Science Weighted Companion Cube
  • Moreno X  - to Vincent
    You can tell that to leikaitsndead. The piece of trash copy and paste my posted comments from the third page of the comment section just so he can be viewed here in the first page. Are these desperate "first posters" that mad to be seen by other people?! What are they so anixous to say "first!" and reduce themselves to copy and paste other people's comments?

    I don't get them at all, really.
  • Pelion09
    no one gives a fuck
  • Dogmatix
    OMG someone has a simple, positive opinion about something, run for your lives, it's the end of the world!
  • katsa5
    Or a sapalanche?
  • PeaceMaker273  - Awesome
    The review was awesome but in the beginning I noticed you said "Portal Cube" instead of Weighted storage cube, just nit picky stuff but still was awesome video.
  • ladydiskette
    As much as "Jurassic Park" is a Thanksgiving "Watching it around the tv while you digest your turkey, stuffing, and cranberry sauce" tradition at my house, I have to say I enjoyed a more analyzed look into this movie.

    Next to this review and Guru Larry's Movie Mistake episode on it, it's nice to see that despite the flaws it does have, it still remains to be one of the most recommended movies around. I guess sometimes it's hard to notice those little quirks and flaws when you are wearing nostalgia goggles on. But it was fun noting them in a comedic light, and it does make you nod and say "Yeah, I guess I did kinda notice that" at least years later when you get older as compared to then when you watched it as a kid.

    Still, so many awesome scenes great memories.

    I could watch the scene where Newman is eaten by the frilled dinosaur (I apologize if I don't know the actual name of it) over and over again.

    Good review you guys :)

    "Run away in a comic fashion Ahhhhh!"
  • Dreadjaws
    The one he shows in the picture is the Companion Cube, and it's not like it's a mistake, you can call it a "Portal Cube" and people will easily understand.
  • H Hog
    If we're gonna be nitpicky, it's called the Weighted Companion Cube.
  • Metroid51
    It's always nice to see a review that opens your eyes to the many flaws/weird things in the movie, thanks critic.
  • Moreno X  - to Metroid51
    It does, doesn't it? I'm surprised to learn when I was watching Guru Larry's Movie Mistakes video on Jurassic Park, that there's passionate purists who will go out of their way to say the way raptors and t-rexs looks in this film (and elsewhere) aren't portrayed accurately. Ugh! I think they forget that this movie came out in 1993. What do you think?
  • PlasticFrogCG
    And how would they know? Considering all we have are skeletons and a few rare tiny pieces of preserved flesh, without having actually seen a live animal any depiction of them is all guess work.
  • minnie3434
    I agree wholeheartedly. You may love a movie so much that it clouds your judgement. You can still love it but at least you can acknowledge it has its flaws. Like me and the Pokemon the First Movie
  • Wfalen  - Jeff Goldblum
    About him being a complete unknown before this movie and not being in a blockbuster movie before...umm, The Fly anyone?
    His performance here is basically the same as in The Fly but just with a bit more "uh":s.
  • ladydiskette
    Also, what Critic may have failed to mention, is that he sort of became the unintentional bad-boy hunk of the movie every girl (and their mother) wanted to be alone with in that building. *winks*

    I mean did you see the way he was lounged on that desk when he was getting his wounds patched up, sure his voice was rambly and full of "uhs" but us girls didn't care back then. ;) lol
  • rozola
    Even in the 80s, he was a bit of a sex symbol (albeit a nerdy one). Goldblum must have some sort of clause in his contract that says he must be shirtless at some point in all his movies. lol
  • HMorris73
    He said "wasn't" a complete unknown.
  • Simon Callahan
    He said he wasn't a complete unknown.
  • faultren
    Very good video - in my opinion the best since the Critic's return. Keep up the good work! Greetings from France!
  • DrForester  - Great
    My only beef with the movie was killing Muldoon rather than letting him outsmart the Raptor like in the books.
  • Kooshmeister
    He originally did. In the original ending they planned for the movie, Muldoon, not the T-rex, shows up to rescue Grant, Ellie and the kids from the raptors. When the ending was changed because Spielberg wanted the T-rex to "be the hero," poor Muldoon's fate was sealed. Despite this, the Topps Comics issues set after the film brought him back due to how popular he was.

    How did he survive according to the comics? I forget, but it was lamely handwaved and then forgotten and he continued appearing as a regular main character, most notably in the potentially epic but never completed "Return to Jurassic Park" story arc which had Grant, Ellie and Muldoon, well, returning to Jurassic Park along with a guy named Edgar who worked for Hammond to investigate the possibility that the rival company who hired Nedry was up to shenanigans. Turns out they were, and so was the US military (!!!).

    The arc got as far as them discovering the military doing some kind of experiments with something called the "green flame," and Edgar turning out to be a bad guy, too, but then it was put on hiatus and Topps canned the series not long afterward, shortly before The Lost World came out. Although Topps did a Lost World comic adaptation, they never did complete Return to Jurassic Park, and, in fact, so far as I know, never did another Jurassic Park comic ever again - another company (IDW, I think) has since done more comics, set after the third film, but none have picked up the "return to Jurassic Park/green flame" storyline.
  • Moreno X  - to Kooshmeister
    "He originally did. In the original ending they planned for the movie, Muldoon, not the T-rex, shows up to rescue Grant, Ellie and the kids from the raptors. When the ending was changed because Spielberg wanted the T-rex to "be the hero," poor Muldoon's fate was sealed. Despite this, the Topps Comics issues set after the film brought him back due to how popular he was."

    Huh. I guess that, to me, I'm a sucker who prefer the t-rex than what it originally was because, you know, it's a freakin' t-rex! What's wrong with that?! :D
  • ShadowHand
    IN my opinion the book had a few good things the movie was missing like in the book there were more dinos in fact there were like 54 raptors and two t-rexs but some of the characters in the book were not to my liking hammond in the book was a childish asshole and as such wasn't sad that he dies in the first book also the scene at the begining of the lost world is from the first jurassic park book also goldblums character also died in the first book. The kids ages where swapped in the book with the boy being older than the sister. Sattler was grants student and already engaged to be married etc... oh and the reason they didn't give the african american guy a shotgun in the book was in the book they didn't have any all they had was a rocket launcher and they only had one.
  • PlasticFrogCG
    Don't forget the lawyer, Gennaro, who not only also survives in the book, but body slams one of the raptors when it attacks him. Yeah, in the book he wasn't quite the sleazy lawyer they made him in the movie.

    Of course without the scene where the T-Rex eats him we wouldn't get Weird Al to sing "...a T-Rex ate our lawyer, well I guess they aren't all bad." :)
  • Welsh93  - All hail T-Rex, queen of awesome.
    It's true, the T-Rex was the best thing in that movie. Please bring back that song, for when you review the third Jurassic Park movie. also have one for the Spinalsourus.
  • Bloodrealm
    Spinalsourus? That sounds like a disease that makes you grow lemons from your spinal column. :P
  • shinryu  - Always fun
    What can I say... I guess that since you are doing newer films (even though this MIGHT have fit in the old Nostalgia Critic timeline) you have so much more material to utilize.
  • ladydiskette
    OH MY GOD! I am seriously squeeing you guys! Doug, Malcolm, and Rachel as cute little mosquitos that is adorable!

    Someone needs to gif that! XD
  • MorleyQ
    Wait, what was from Alice in Wonderland? Was I looking away at that moment?
  • ReckoningReviewer
    Thank you for this review Doug! Jurassic Park is one of my favorite movies of all time, and yes, the T-Rex is hands down the best character of the whole movie! Thank you for this review of awesomeness! Everything in here is just freaking awesome, it's possibly one of my new favorite reviews of your's. Also, I sure hope you review the third film, because we can all agree the third film needs to be destroyed.
  • The Thinker  - Book over Movie
    I know the movie was decent but it cut out quite a bit that could have made it more awesome.
    1. There were more survivors that escaped the Island but Hammond had died due to his greed and selfishness.
    2. There was a Security group though out of 13 members only 2 died (at least that I remember anyway and they were caught off guard). The Leader killed a raptor with his bare hands and scared the rest off from attacking the compound the first time (he survived that is certain).
  • ShadowHand
    yes well malcome also died in the book and hammond's character in the book was annoying and almost childis.
  • Eyeshot
    About the commercial: Disney Marketing brought Tim Allen into a recording studio just to have him exclaim, "Luscious locks!"???

    The argument "what are the odds" concerning the mosquitoes can be applied to the 2009 Star Trek movie a good many times (please review that one, Critic!).

    Speaking of Star Trek, what do you think are worse, spotlights or lens flares (as supplied by Spielberg's protege, J.J. Abrams)?
  • Cassmi
    That comment about Spielberg's use of lighting is so true! When I was probably around six, I saw Close Encounters of the Third Kind, and my mother (who, by the way, isn't very movie-savvy) says "I'm so sick of Spielberg's OTT use of lights". That means he really does emphasise bright lighting too much if even my mother noticed it. :P
  • Clawshawt
    Lol oh god the title card.

    I love how Doug reacts to the T-Rex roars, not far from my reactions. XD
  • Drakonos
    oh yeah, one of the best reviews ever
  • ladydiskette
    When I watched the movie, I thought the story about the dinosaur embryos being smuggled out was going to be whole plot of the story, but then that was before I realized it was the exposition it needed to get the dinosaurs loose and make it a whole "fight for survival" storyline.

    But to be fair, to the movie itself, it was a exposition that wasn't tossed aside or ignored later on in the movie as they did have to use his computer to turn the building and the security devices back online. So in a way it was used as a excuse for the main storyline but it did provide relevance later on in a good subtle non-hamfisted way during the film's final conflict.
  • Mauropteryx
    Nice sound wiplash with the opening.

    The Jeff Goldblum impression got old faster than Goldblum himself. Just saying "uh, uh, uh" is not a Goldblum impression.

    The Lysine contingency wouldn't work because it would take too long.

    The flaws in the park are actually the whole point of the story. The park was completely automated and dependent on one underpaid nerd in order to save money. The employees also didn't know how to handle dinosaurs because Hammond was trying to get the project done as fast as he could. Hence, them using force to get the raptors to behave rather than being smart about it.

    Most raptors cannot be identified on first sight considering many of them look very similar and at the time not many raptor babies had ever been found. So yes, Dr. Alan Grant is completely on his A-game. The only problem is Velociraptor is not a species. Velociraptor antirrhopus is the species.

    And how did you not catch the edits of doom?

    I'm sorry. I should say whether I like the video. I just nerd-rage all over Jurassic Park because it's a big part of my childhood.
    But this review was still enjoyable even though you missed a few things and overdid the Goldblum joke. I liked that the skits served as emphasis rather than cutting for a random joke.

    So yeah, this was a good video. And I'm glad you'll be getting to JPIII (maybe you can get in a fight with your brother).

    I'm just glad this wasn't as pain-inducing, me into a fetal position putting, heart ripping, and eating my cat making as your Lost World piece of shit which I refuse on pain of death to call a review YOU SON OF A BITC...sorry, I'll be ok.
  • Carteeg_Struve
    I also took his inquiry about the baby raptor to more be case of him asking:

    "This isn't what I think it is? Please tell me I'm wrong. Tell me... I am fucking wrong!"

    The expression on his face when he asks pretty much summed it up.
  • Plotspider  - That's what I thought too
    Yeah, I thought that too. He's kind of like: "you really didn't make the most dangerous creature you could have, did you?"
  • Whatpayne
    Oh yes. This is what I've always took his reaction as.

    ...Also he's a paleontologist. Not a Biologist, per-say. He's only ever seen fossilized raptor bones and rare artist's drawing of what a raptor might look like in his career. Holding a living, breathing, thing is quite new experience to him.
    And lastly, most fossilized remains ever found are incomplete. There are rarely complete remains of every development stages of every animal found. Meaning usually you have to simply guess what newborn raptor would look like.
  • rozola
    I didn't think the Lysine contingency scene was pointless either, because it shows just how dedicated/crazed Hammond is about his park and his dinosaurs. He is willing to put other people's lives in danger (including his own grandchildren) to prevent any harm coming to his dinosaurs. I think it tied in nicely with the earlier scene where Hammond believes the dinosaurs have all imprinted on him at birth. He sees himself as their "father" of sorts.

    Also it's mentioned in the original script that the Lysine contingency would take over a week to work, but I guess Spielberg wanted to go with the "Hammond is a crazy asshole" angle.
  • ImitationJesus
    there is something that's always bugged me since watching the film the first time: how the hell does Hammond get into the trailer? we see a helicopter arrive on the dig site, but we don't see anyone get out of it. when first watching it, i thought the copter was arriving to pick him up since we're introduced to him in the next scene, but he's being dropped off? that's never made sense to me.

    why is the Dilophosaurus only in that one scene with Nedry? they make a point about it being deadly and venomous and shit, but they don't follow-up on it. did it become rex chow?

    also, yeah kid, stop spanking the chair and give her the gun. you're doing jack shit here and she needs the gun to protect your Ferris Bueller ass from a mutha fuckin' raptor.

    and nothing on the rex chasing those other dinos?
  • Cinnamon Scudworth
    Because only Nedry went to that area of the park.
  • embercoral
    About the Dilo: Couldn't think of enough creative licensing to follow up on it, I guess?

    I mean, there was no evidence to suggest that the Dilophosaurus had frills or venom spit at the time (still isn't today), but other dinosaur-oriented games and stuff followed up on that model simply because it looked cool.

    And once a predator tastes human flesh, it can be difficult to get off the new diet. This holds true for big cats, like lions and tigers (though argumentatively, they are usually older cats because they are unable to obtain their natural source of food due to an injury, i.e. a gunshot, broken teeth, etc.)
  • Cassmi
    Concerning Goldblum being an unknown actor before Jurassic Park, The Fly remake from 1986 was pretty big, wasn't it? Not sure.
  • snoofulus
    Obligatory SA comment:
    "And here we have it - he's officially run out of material."

    Lol... nah just kidding, I'm sure it's gonna be fun - watching it tomorrow or something.
  • BlitzemV2
    Funny review, but I still love this movie. Tiny flaws don't ruin it for me.
  • blackmaniac
    fun fact: the glass roof wasn't supposed to be smashed by the T-Rex head. It did, the kid actors were terrified, shot was left in, because too damn fucking good
  • disneyboy20022
    That was an Amazing review. I liked the part where you compared Hammond to Scrooge McDuck in the beginning. This was by for your best review since the return of The Nostalgia Critic. I look forward to a Jurassic Park 3 review sometime in the future
  • Badgercheese94
    God, speaking of the glass roof. I still remember that day, years ago. My older cousin loved to do "rides", and I had a large toy jeep that could fit like 2 kids. It was awesome, and you could actually drive it. Anyway, my cousin was giving my neighbour a "Jurassic Park" ride which was basically my beighbour sitting in the jeep as my cousin shook it, prentending it was a T. Rex attacking it, well the glass windows of the jeep broke and slashed my neighbour's forehead. That was pretty scary ._.
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