Nostalgia Critic - Catwoman

(401 votes, average 4.67 out of 5)
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Comments (599)
  • randominanity  - F1RST
    I'm sorry, I just had to.
  • LikaLaruku
    avatar
    ::Looks up Catwoman on Wikipedia::

    Man to I have a shit sense of time. Don't know why I was surprised that all of the classic Catwoman actresses were so old they were dead or barely clinging to life.

    Lee Meriwether from the Batman 66 movie went to school with my grama's first husband & outlived all three of them.

    Ooh, His Ertha Kit impression is really good.

    Who's idea was it to give the Catwoman movie a video game? & which of the two was worse?

    Danny DeVito was pretty good as the Peguin, but not as funny as Dick Cheney...I mean Burgess Meredith.

    "Years & years of rewrites & THIS is what they come up with?" Like Duke Nukem Forever & Daikatana & Too Human & Aliens: Colonial Marines.....

    18:36 Beetlejuice lunchbox. & a Sex in the City trivia game? Sounds like pure torture.

    Hmm...Isn't the cop in this movie a cop in one of the Law & Order series?
  • alex117  - Why do you hate pixar so much
    why the fuck do you despise pixar so fucking much? fucking cunt
  • Mattbrain
    Why yes, yes you are.
  • Moreno X  - to alex117
    I think you're trolling at the wrong person pal.
  • Laxpolilla  - ?
    Um...are you trolling someone or are you referrng to The Critic's jibe against Puss in Boots? Because that's Dreamworks, hun.
  • Dragon_Nexus
    What is it from actors who play cops in cop shows who always end up playing cops in movies too?

    Is the role of Cop really that iconic that it's all you can be?
  • tweedel  - slow internet conetion
    my internet conection is slow so so I'm righting this in a reply spot this was great see you in the next two weeks NC.
  • Juicewski  - Two hundred and twenty second!
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    Sorry, had to post that.
    PS. Batman returns is the best batman film
  • ladydiskette
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    Hah, jokes on you Critic, I didn't bet on that scene in the first place! *keeps her $10*
  • Ela
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    I watched the scene without cracking a smile. Should I send my PayPal details?
  • itstheblueguy
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    With this, two days late, we mark the anniversary of the day that choosing the lauded, groundbreaking crime drama as your favorite in the series became just too typical to condone.

    How much longer will it be "cool" and "edgy" to side with the oh-so retro passable summer blockbusters and their unyeilding reputation as "decent" and "overall enjoyable?" Stay tuned!
  • ChicagosMindfreak
    I gotta ask, the weather is getting pretty warm where I am. Do you still need a coat atop your high horse?
  • bassbait
    Since everybody's replying uselessly, here's my reply -

    @7:35 in the video - am I crazy to think that the background police station is the police station from Psych? I'm pretty sure it is.
  • Tenshizen
    Let the hilarity ensue!
  • Zorro4k6
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    I agree, this was pretty funny Doug. I remember when this movie came out. I never saw it. I just wasn't interested in it at all. I think maybe one day on like FX I saw some of it, and yeah, it's bad. There's nothing else I can say about it.

    So who made that Catwomen book/cover? It's pretty good.
  • Safi
    avatar
    Been refreshing all night, love you NC x]

    Blue wall now? I think it'd be real retro if you went back to the white wall..... :p

    & he didn't apologise to her for saving her life, he was apologising cause he thought she was trying to commit suicide, when she was actually just trying to rescue the cat (which disappeared)
  • ThatManWithTheHeadband12
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    Dunno if you noticed, but it's been becoming bluer for quite a few weeks. And it's not even a paintjob. It's a lighting trick I don't know how he's achieving
  • Burzdolion
    Haven't seen this film in a while!
  • Spritle101
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    Haven't seen this film ever.
  • jowistinks  - A review that needed to happen.
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    Yeah, glad we're moving beyond nostalgic material so I can see NC lose his mind over some more modern stinkers. Totally ready for this one.
  • dinobot2468
    DAMN! Was first on then i had to log in then went back on the video then people had already commented :'( ahh well great video as alwayyysss!!! And if you wall now blue? O_o
  • Psychedelic_Psycho
    Omg I'm so early :D. Nice job NC. I've always thought this movie needed some critic justice.
  • ladydiskette
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    Why, did the creators have to give her the name Patience?

    What was wrong with naming her "Selina Kyle" I mean, everyone (whether they read the Batman comics or not) knew her real name was Selina Kyle, so what was wrong with keeping the name "Selina"?
  • Undertaker91
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    easy, not naming her Selina Kyle makes sure this movie has nothing to do with the Batman universe
  • Dragon_Nexus
    That's exactly what I was thinking of.

    I also wondered if there was some kind of licensing issue, like they had the rights to the name Catwoman, but not to Selina Kyle.
  • jdwilburn101
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    these sketches really need to die. I love the critic but these extra plots add too much to the running time. Timmothy Green was perfect because it was used only alittle and didn't distract from the review. Son of the Mask was much and now this is almost jumping the fried coke.
  • LordVX
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    I do like the sketches, but they need to be shorter and not too stuffed like some are.
  • LikaLaruku
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    They need to be longer & more frequent.
  • ladydiskette
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    I think the whole "cat breathing life into her" was I think suppose to be a subversion of the old wife's tale about never letting a cat into a baby's crib. because they thought that back then, the cat would suck the breath out of a baby.

    At least that is my theory.

    I mean, they sort of did the same thing with "Batman Returns" but it was just something I wondered that maybe that is where the guy who came up with that idea probably got inspired from.
  • FishEyenoMiko
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    "they sort of did the same thing with 'Batman Returns'"

    Yeah, in that it was all suggestion; she wasn't really dead and the cat(s) didn't bring her back to life. This took that idea and made it literal.
  • Gagnon
    I cringe whenever the sketches begin. I feel like I'm being forced to watch a college comedy improv group.
  • snoofulus
    Congratulations - you've given an accurate review of the entire standard of acting on TGWTG and countless other creators of "internet comedy".

    And when this dude screams at the stupid movie that doesn't have any of that "amateur nerd in his basement" vibe to it? No? The acting is all college but the guy staring into the camera reminds of professional masters of Comedy in Cinema?
    This "college improv" feel is pretty much what makes ALL this stuff charming in the first place, dude; had they done the same thing on a "pro" level, with the pretense of creating great comedy or something, it wouldn't have been anywhere this entertaining. SAME GOES FOR COLLEGE IMPROV! The stuff that makes people laugh in a college show might make those same people roll their eyes in a professional theater.

    Man, the logic some people use... :D
    Btw, I've been to school plays, a lot of the acting there (dramatic or comedic) is often better than some of the stuff you see in big Hollywood movies.
  • chcoman123
    Exactly. These sketches are NOT FUNNY! It worked in Timothy Green and in King and I because it wasn't a narrative, they were jokes, and that's how they should stay, AS JOKES. Look, Doug, if you want to tell a narrative, then, that's fine, but keep Nostalgia Critic out of it. Nobody associates NC with a flowing Narrative. They associate him with bad movies and jokes. If you want to tell a narrative, then make a different, smaller show that has a narrative. But for God's sake, make NC exactly the same way it was before. We loved it like that, and always will, SO PLEASE MAKE IT LIKE THAT!
  • ThatManWithTheHeadband12
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    I'm not even going to repeat myself. It's not worth it. Do you hear yourself when you talk? You don't want a flowing narrative? Or a supporting cast? Fine, then stop saying you like the anniversary movies
  • mr_rubino
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    It's a review.
    It does not need a "flowing narrative" if "flowing narrative" now means "scenes of nothing of overall importance being wedged into the video at awkward times." And it does not need the same 5 people forced into those unimportant, awkwardly-placed scenes every single week.

    And what the honest hell do the anniversary movies have to do with this? Those are all "narrative" and are still overlong. Reviews are ostensibly made for the purpose of reviewing things.
  • snoofulus
    "It's a review.
    It does not need a "flowing narrative""
    Nothing needs anything. When it comes to entetainment, what matters is what one WANTS, and what the viewer then happens to like - only that he then shouldn't assume to have a say in the matter ;)

    ""scenes of nothing of overall importance being wedged into the video at awkward times.""
    They tie into the review (even the actual review at the end), and do their part of addressing the "other catwomen" aspect while providing entertaining spoofs (although I found the Pfeiffer impression to be the only good one).
    They do comprise a narrative despite of whatever you're trying to say there.
    And no, they're not any more or less important than any of the countless other jokes or gimmicks ever done in an internet review. Their "importance" plays no role in anything.


    "Reviews are ostensibly made for the purpose of reviewing things."
    Yes, reviews that consist of mostly review are made for reviewing things.
    Reviews that are filled with gags and parodies, on the other hand, are made for the purpose of reviewing things and making fun of it / entertaining the audience with comedy - not just reviewing things!
    And a video that combines a review with a comedic narrative... is made for the purpose of combining a review with a comedic narrative.

    The way it's done is looking at the video and what's in it, labelling it based on its content and THEN juding it on its own merits.
    NOT making up a neat category, and then giving thumbs down because you can't squeeze it into your little sandbox!

    All of your attempts to somehow back up your opinions with "logic" keep failing miserably - so why don't you just resort to saying you don't like the sketches and be done with it?


    Case in point...
    "And it does not need the same 5 people forced into those unimportant, awkwardly-placed scenes every single week."
    And neither does it "need" 5 different people doing cameos in unimportant, awkwardly-placed scenes. For some reason it wasn't a problem when it was only Doug, or when his brother kept showing up for comic relief, but now that this regular team has grown by two actors suddenly it's a problem and they should be replaced every single week?
    Yea... right.
  • snoofulus
    "Exactly. These sketches are NOT FUNNY! It worked in Timothy Green and in King and I because it wasn't a narrative, they were jokes, and that's how they should stay, AS JOKES."

    And yet another clown trying to back up their personal distaste with some kind of logical system; GIVE IT UP, pal - it doesn't work.

    Why is it okay if jokes are unfunny, or independent skits are unfunny, but having a narrative makes it inexcusable? Why?
    Then you're saying it's okay to have a narrative (whatdoyouknow, apparently a corny narrative can make a series of corny jokes and references extra fun after all) but not when the NC is involved? Again, why? Oh, a review is a review and can't have narrative subplots? Again, says who? Reviews are often mixed with frame / cutaway narratives, it's pretty much standard fare nowadays. Just as including impressions and jokes in reviews - come to think of it, a review is a review and a spoof is a spoof, how can a reviewer suddenly jump to aping some character in the movie?

    Lol there are no rules on which formats you can combine with your review, it all comes down to execution.
    Had you liked the skits in this one (as did many others including me), you would've thrown your entire "omg it makes no sense to have a narrative in a review" spiel in garbage.

    So quit pretending to be more objective and reasonable than you are, just so you can attempt to justify ending your whiny post with the usual self-entitled "do your show as I want it", okay?
  • Dragon_Nexus
    I'm finding myself agreeing.
    It just makes the review harder to watch a second time. The frequent interruptions just breaks the flow of the review.

    I know it must suck that you've got this team around you that suddenly has nothing to do since Demo Reel fell apart, but shoe-horning them into every review is not the way it should go.

    I mean, when did the cast and crew need to be pushed into every review before? Bhargav Dronamraju was an occasional cameo, same as Rob Walker. If they can't do reviews and such then maybe they need to be let go because they're dragging down the flow.
  • snoofulus
    "It just makes the review harder to watch a second time. The frequent interruptions just breaks the flow of the review."
    That's just because you want to rewatch the review, but not the skits, though - for someone who'd like to rewatch both, that's not a problem :D

    Hey, I've rewatched some of the Plinkett reviews multiple times and I had no problems skipping through the skits whenever I felt like it *shrug*

    IT'S NOT TV. SKIP THROUGH THEM. PROBLEM SOLVED.


    "I mean, when did the cast and crew need to be pushed into every review before?"
    So because it wasn't done before, it shouldn't be done now? Isn't that, like, an appeal to tradition or something?
    Had they started out as a "creative team" from the beginning I'm sure you wouldn't have any problem with it - so yea, "I don't like things that are different" can be pretty much used to sum up your entire post.
  • KillForGlory
    Seriously, you should stop doing those skits, they are insanely tedious and very boring. Demo Reel failed for a reason.

    Focus more on the review, giving abysmally funny stories certainly does devalue the reviews whose quality has been going down through the years anyway.
  • Asturas  - Totally
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    agree with every single word you`ve written!
  • TheMollyandPippinShow
    Yeah, it's not like those two people from Demo Reel need money or something. Really people?
  • jdwilburn101
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    honestly, have the two of them work on a different show. Nostalgia Critic every other week sounded awesome and would give Doug a chance to work on other shows the two from DR could have worked on. And it's not the issue of the actors, I think they're fine. It's just it takes away from the review too much. Hence why every other reviewer on this site uses themselves or at most one person to help them get across a point of why a scene or line doesn't work. The nostalgia Critic survived years without the need for plot. He should have a short show that does... but hey that's just my 2 cents
  • Sewblon
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    I have nothing against the actors from Demo Reel personally, but this argument only makes sense under the assumption that working for Doug is the only way that they could possibly make enough income to survive, which is probably not true since they are both professional actors. Doug Walker is not the sole employer in Chicago and playing characters in his work is not the only use for the skills of professional actors.
  • mr_rubino
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    They seemed to do well enough before Demo Reel. I assume they're not under a supernatural curse tying them to this show.
  • bobbychips
    I disagree, most people watch his reviews not for an opinion of the movie itself but for some laughs, and I am one of the few that LOVED Demo Reel and keeping the cast members in definitely makes it funnier
  • LikaLaruku
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    It makes the show not only more interesting & longer but fresh. 15-30 minute shows are ideal.

    Besides, the reviews themselves are already kinda fake; the Critic is a character, reading a script, performed by an actor, who admitted that he & the character do not always have the same opinion.
  • Spritle101
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    The half hour ones are a bit long for me, unless it's just a straight review where I don't need to actually watch anything or a podcast I can just listen to while doing something else.

    Well, they're good for dinner time. Not like there's anything good on TV anyway.
  • brick mooncode
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    I think the whole idea of distinguishing between the character and the reviewer is basically just an excuse for reviewers to make up opinions that are funnier than their real opinions.
  • minnie3434
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    I really like them. I think they should continue with the skits. I loved Demo Reel and believe they're doing good.

    P.S. I actually like catwoman. It was fun to watch
  • SpeedyEric
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    The skits must go on.
  • Gigakoops
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    Agreed, I enjoy the sketches. They bring something new to the table in terms of formula, and so far I've enjoyed them.
  • LikaLaruku
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    This was the compromise you got for getting this show back at all.

    Doug got bored, he wanted to do something different, you kept nagging him to do the same thing over & over, you shit talked his new project, so he combined the two. Live with it.
  • trlkly
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    They shit talked his new project because he acted like an asshole in creating it. And I note he still hasn't apologized. Doug Walker seems to be incapable of admitting he messed up. Even when he came back he had to make a big deal about it being for himself instead of for others.

    And until he apologizes, shitting on him is still fair game. If he weren't so selfish, we wouldn't have to hurt his feelings.

    And to think I was actually going to defend him until you had to be an ass.
  • Spritle101
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    I can see who's being the real ass clown here.

    You have the gall to act like Doug owes you something? He owes an apology to no one.

    I think you need to leave the site & reevaluate why you ever came here in the first place.
  • Jetjakal_of_Neomu
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    Wait, He's the ass? If you're against Doug, why the hell do you even watch his videos then? Seems kind of pointless to come here and watch something created by someone you obviously have a personal problem with, just to bitch some more. Wow, lol.
  • THOOM
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    Listen, trikly McNitPick, Doug can switch formats as much as he wants WITHOUT apologizing for it. He is not asking you haters to pay for viewing his work. In fact, most of you dicks have adblock so you don't even have to watch the commercials. He owes you nothing and I hope he never apologizes for thinking outside of the box. He doesn't even have to ban you from his site (unlike Anita Sarkeesian), that is how insignificant your opinion is.

    I am only responding to your post because someone should tell you how pathetic you are.

    The fact that you were okay with NOT posting the idiotic rant insulting Doug--until someone who ISN'T Doug pissed you off--is telling in how fricking stupid you are.
  • Dust
    "Acted like an asshole in creating it"... oh yeah, he hopped the fence while you were raking your yard and punched you in the face. Then walked away, screaming "Watch Demo Reel!" at small children.

    Wait - you mean he had the nerve to do something different... yeah, I've yet to see that qualify as a definition of "asshole".
  • Moreno X  - to trlkly
    I think you need a hug from Phelous right at this point bud. If you think Doug is behaving like a jerk, than do this: (1) Stop watching his videos and (2) Watch instead Phelous' videos. Can't choose one of them? Well then that's your problem then.
  • rockybalboa211
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    He doesn't owe you anything! Why must he apologize? Is it so wrong for a person to try something different and to try to grow as an individual? Overall, you're the complete jerk, Trlkly, and you're not wanted here!
  • snoofulus
    "And to think I was actually going to defend him until you had to be an ass."
    So what you're saying is that you're willing to diametrically switch your opinion / thesis based on how other commenters treat you?
  • clearspira  - @likalaruku
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    You like the sketches - good for you. But commenting on absolutely everyone who has a dissenting opinion won't change anyones opinions. In fact its far more likely to do the exact opposite. Doug doesn't need any White Knights defending him dude.
  • Sheeyah  - Sketches better as bookends?
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    I actually enjoy the sketches mostly, though not completely. The one thing I dislike is when they interrupt the review, which makes it a little disjointed. Perhaps the sketches could frame the review, like Linkara does. That way, those who don't like them can just skip to the start of the review and stop when it's done. Those that like the sketches can watch all the way through.
  • rockybalboa211
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    Personally, I wish Linkara would place the sketches throughout the reviews like he used to. I loved Linkara's sketches. They are incredibly hilarious and, sometimes, suspenseful!
  • Dragon_Nexus
    I want to thumb this up.

    It makes the review really difficult to watch when it keept getting broken up into segments.

    I don't mind a sketch at the start and end and *maybe* one in the middle for a commercial break, but 3 or 4 dips per review just breaks the narrative flow. It even started to feel like the sketches overtook the review in this one, like he hardly even talked about the movie.
  • THOOM
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    He's annoyed with the sketches and he is giving his opinion, regardless of what we or Doug think. We think he is a whiny little cantankerous grump. So we will give our opinion regardless of what anyone thinks. Yes, our criticism may "make it worse", but trolls like you and trikly are here to stay, and so are we.
  • mr_rubino
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    Let me guess: The character is "growing and evolving". And he's gonna make the sketches longer and more pointless until he's done growing and evolving.
    Shlurp shlurp shlurp.
  • snoofulus
    Pointless? They're directly tied to the movie thematically, and make for an amusing way to deal with (remember, "deal with" doesn't necessarily mean dryly giving it your criticism; it can also mean spoofing, satirizing, playing with the concept etc.) the other Catwoman portrayals.

    It's about as "pointless" as any other joke ever made in any review, ever - in that it doesn't have to be there, or could be replaced with a series of serious statements about the same thing.

    The only thing that can be said in your support is that the specific NC text doesn't always tie directly to the dialogue in the skits and vice versa, but so what? It's a SUBPLOT, and at the end of the review the two are actually combined into one package, with the Catwomen representing the (fickle) audience expectations of what he might say next.

    I'm just breaking it down in such spergin' detail because apparently you require an explanation for something this obvious :D
  • ladydiskette
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    The high heel guns were the best


    If I had those and someone tried to steal my purse all I would do is take one off shoot him in the head and put it back on before the cops even saw it ;)


    "Oh he shot himself officer...I tried to stop him but he was just crazy!"
  • snoofulus
    "He lifted my foot and shot himself in the back multiple times" ;)
  • Applemask
    There's a seek bar.
  • Charles LeQuinn
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    Yeah I agree. I've been giving them a try but I'm just going to skip through the skit stuff now. All they do is break up the review in a bad way and waste time..
  • CC*  - Glory
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    well,technically Demo reel didn't fail,doug stopped making it
  • maalbe987
    I completely disagree. I think they add a lot to the reviews & create an interesting new dynamic.
  • ThatManWithTheHeadband12
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    Demo Reel didn't fail for the reason you're implying. You can't open your eyes to new ideas? Your problem. Not his
  • mr_rubino
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    Really, he oughta just drop the whole "review" thing altogether and do vaudeville. We need new ideas and reviewing things is old hat.
  • snoofulus
    Your smartassery is as misplaced your strangely long nose.
    There's no such categories as "review" or "vaudeville" when it comes to this whole internet critic thing - not in the sense that you can't call them that when it's accurate, but meaning that these entertainers are going to produce whatever combination of review, education, spoof/parody, sketches, misleading stage personas or intercut gags they want, and you can then label the product in whatever way you so please.

    Can't call a clip consisting of 80% review (of which of course about 50% consist of actual reviewing, while the rest is plot summary and jokes) and 20% skits a review?
    Well then call it "skit review" or whatever. It's a COMBINATION of two/several formats.
    These things have been around for YEARS and been happily called reviews by everyone, but you're free to be as precise you feel comepelled to be, you know?
    And none of that indicates that the 80% percent of review should be "dropped altogether" because of that.
  • priley0878  - LAME
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    I always said this was a horrible ass film
  • Cyrad
    Wow, Catwoman dies, not by being physically thrown off a building, but by getting FLUSHED DOWN THE TOILET? Who the heck wrote this movie?

    I think the blue background is a little too bright. Maybe make it more saturated? I -am- glad there's no white there anymore. It contrasted too much with your black suit.
  • embercoral  - Who knows
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    Perhaps that was a metaphor for the script itself.
  • Xx_Kares_xX  - I actually disagree
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    I find the skits creative and entertaining.
  • In-The-Dark-Shadows  - Good review
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    Very good video Mr. Walker. :)

    I like the skits. To me they are funny and entertaining. I'm also happy that the people who were in Demo Reel have something to do.
  • BunnyDemonJenny  - Well.
    I think the Skits are pretty good, myself. I kinda like seeing the little segments, though...yes, some of them can run on a little long. Like the Russel Crowe one last episode, but...they're not -bad-. The Son of the Mask one had me laughing quite a lot, and I didn't mind any of the others--didn't mind this one ither. I mean, they have a big studio, and other actors now. It'd be a waste to not -use- them. And Doug puts on a spectacular performance. Really, it just takes a little getting used too. Yes, it's changed a little, but that doesn't make it bad.

    I say good for you, Doug! ^.^ I think you're doing a great job, and really making me, at least, smile. =3
  • In-The-Dark-Shadows  - Change is not always bad ^.^
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    Yes. Just because Change happens, does not mean its something bad. :) Like I said, I do like how he is using what he has insted of letting something good go to waste. ^.^
  • THOOM
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    I enjoy the skits also. It feels like Doug is actually stretching his comedic chops and filmmaking skills, instead of him being in a room alone, yelling at the screen for 20 minutes. Him working with the other talents feels like a comedy family thing. I love it.
  • BunnyDemonJenny
    Oh wow! I never expected anyone to comment on my, well, comment. ^^;; Especially not two people. And you even agreed with me! Wow, I feel sort of flattered. Thank you!
  • LeafRangerCritic
    You know, I'm going to risk utter hate and such for this but....I actually enjoy this movie. I mean yeah it has it's problems, but I also rather enjoy it. I can imagine all the Batman/Catwoman fanboys would ahte this movie and I can see why, but I honestly don't see why people outside that fanbase hate this movie that much. It's not that bad. Not great, but not horrible either. *shrugs* I jsut don't get why people hated this movie so much, other then some bad CGI effects. I honestly don't agree with or see the problems NC brings up, as they seem plausible to me. I mean if no one could figure out that Superman was simply Clark Kent without glasses, why then should this cop figure out patience is Catwoman?
  • SlappyTheSquirrel  - Well...
    The character premise is dumb, for one. Not Catwoman from the comics, who handled the cat thing with a bit more subtlety (aside from the puns and costume), but the written character in this movie was so over the top (Sniffing catnip? Really?!). Her enemy isn't the cops trying to stop her, it's nothing to do with cats, it's...a makeup company. Really? THAT was the big baddie they came up with? Kind of lame, really. And then you've got the problem of the effects, which yes were awful. The suit is clearly just to get guys watching, because the source material catwoman's suit was not nearly so skimpy. And why did she ditch the cop? Clearly, it can be explained with an "independence" thing (cats are independent creatures), but that's not done. This wasn't the worst movie of all time, but it wasn't good (in my opinion) by any stretch of the imagination and failed to do justice to comics, Catwoman, or women. Honestly...? It's more like a parody of Catwoman than a serious movie. And if it was set up to be a parody, it would be pretty good.
  • TragicGuineaPig
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    You know where they got this whole "evil makeup company" plot from?

    It's the origin story of CLAYFACE! A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT BATMAN VILLAIN!

    Sheesh!
  • Cyborcat
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    That would indicate that anyone involved with this movie knew anything about Batman ... and I doubt that.
  • TheGreatEscapist
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    What you mentioned about Clark Kent and his glasses; I thought the same thing when NC brought it up. Hell, when I was watching "Batman Returns" with some friends one of them pointed out that a real person would be able to recognize Selina Kyle's face since that mask doesn't cover enough of her face. Or "The Incredibles"; my mother pointed out that the family's masks wouldn't be very effective in protecting one's identity.
    It's a superhero convention we've sort of come to accept, yet we also love to make fun of it because it's so silly if applied to real life.
  • snoofulus
    Well I mean it's really just a cinematic/theatralic device if you think about it - not in the case of Superman, of course, that one's more tricky; but all these "half-face mask and goggles" guys could easily just... wear a full-face mask, you know? But they don't because the author wants to show a part of their face in accordance to whatever style they're envisioning for their hero.

    That's why it's so easy to accept - because you can just say "well in actuality he's covering his mouth, too", and problem solved :)
  • Eyeshot
    avatar
    I read in a tabloid once that Halle Berry was seen snogging the director. A few months later she dissed him at the Razzies! Poor guy ...
  • THOOM
    avatar
    Poor guy? He got some Halle Berry pussy (no pun intended)and you are saying "poor guy"? I think he probably got over her dissing his movie at the Razzies.
  • Cyborcat
    avatar
    Because tabloids are such a reliable source.
  • NostalgiaKid000
    avatar
    I had no idea this movie existed.

    You know, aside from the weak feminist message, this movie didn't look THAT bad. Just typical bad comic movie dumb.

    Nice review as always, Doug. I'm glad you dropped the cut off dates because if you ask me, the 21st century is most responsible for crappy movies anyway.
  • THOOM
    avatar
    I saw this at the movies and I don't think it was that bad at all. I thought Berry was great as Catwoman.I like the battle with Sharon Stone, and I thought the movie was fun. It certainly wasn't the worst major theatrical release of that year.
  • SpeedyEric  - C.R.A.H.B.S.
    avatar
    I actually didn't think that Doug would go up against this hairball of a comic book movie. I remember when this movie came out, I had SOME interest in seeing it. It wasn't until it came out on DVD that I heard that this film is WORSE than Batman & Robin. At least Halle Berry accepted her Razzie for Worst Actress.

    Whenever I flip through channels and see this film pop up, the major things that causes my to flip away are the editing, the acting, the CGI, and the camera work. Also, the color correction it really off.

    10:26- ...Umm, movie, last time I checked, Catwoman in the comics NEVER had cat like powers and abilities. ...In fact, she has no powers at all.

    16:31- Costume = SUBTLE!!

    I wonder if Doug and Rob would ever do a Let's Play of the Sex in the City Trivia Game, 'cause that would be hilarious.

    20:47- "Me am smart cop person."
    24:11- Dude, Sherlock Holmes, you are not.

    It's stuff like this that show why I'm not a fan of Sharon Stone. Oh, and ironic twist, Halle Berry's character name in the first Flinstones movie is Sharon Stone, in case some one forgot.

    26:13- And she hopefully got her ass ran over by the Tumbler Batmobile that night, instantly killing her. That's my alternate ending to this crap, because this movie was never ment to exist. At least we got a GOOD movie with Catwoman 8 years later, and Anne Hathaway was perfect (no pun intended) in the role.
  • LordVX  - Catwoman
    avatar
    I know this film is terrible, but I have seen worst films than this. The Dark Knight Rises, Son of the Mask, Identity Thief, Lost in Space, & Moulin Rouge.

    Both Anne adn Halley's Catwomen are terrible. One is a Pussy Galore like character (James Bond based), and the other is a super powered rip off with no good treatment.
  • SpeedyEric
    avatar
    The Dark Knight Rises is NOT bad. Batman & Robin is bad, Steel is bad, Catwoman is undoubtingly bad. But any of the films of The Dark Knight Trilogy are NOT bad. They're critically aclaimed, they're each a cirtified fresh on Rotton Tomatoes, and they are in IMDB Top 250 list.

    I'm sorry, but I just find it annoying when people bash The Dark Knight Rises without giving a logical reason of why.
  • Spottedfeather
    avatar
    1. Christian Bale is a horrible Bruce Wayne. There is basically no difference between his portrayal of Bruce Wayne and Batman. No depth.

    2. Bane wasn't portrayed in any sort of resemblance to how he's been shown to be in the last 20 years.

    3. As always, Michael Caine is completely out of place in the role of Alfred. He's way too talented for the part.

    4. Anne Hathaway as Catwoman. She's not bad to look at, but trying to sludge through her movies ? Just....no.
  • roy
    for me christian bale as bruce wayne/batman is just good no bad is just good
  • SpeedyEric  - Spottedfeather
    avatar
    1. No he's not.
    2. He's more respected to the sorce material than "Batman & Robin."
    3. He's a good Alfred.
    4. I respect Miss Hathaway as an actor.
  • Spottedfeather
    avatar
    Christian Bale IS a horrible Bruce Wayne. And Bane is close to the source material ? Not hardly. I'm guessing you haven't read the comic nor watched the cartoons ? When has bane ever looked like he does in the movie ? Never. Michael Caine isn't a good Alfred. He is way too talented for the part. Every time I see him as Alfred, I keep wondering "what in the world is such an incredible actor like Michael Caine doing playing a part like this ? He's a leading man, not guy off to the side." I'm not wrong.
  • SpeedyEric
    avatar
    Why is it that people I see in person LOVES "Rises," but people I talk to online HATES the film.

    Also, Spottedfeather, you love being a troll believing everything you say is right, don't you? It's called "opinions," and everyone has their right to their own. Grow up.
  • snoofulus
    Lol the "mentor to the hero" isn't a "small side part", it's a key part in any standard hero story you dumb poser.

    So let's sum up, Michael Caine is too good i.e. should be worse, and Christian Bale is too bad i.e. should be better, yea? Um why again?

    "I'm not wrong"... lol.

    Actually you are, because Michael Caine was HORRIBLE in this movie - I mean he was good as long as he played the guy from the two previous movies, but then when the script fell through a black hole and demanded him to start crying and sobbing in the most over-the-top melodramatic way, something... well, misfired apparently. Because it was awful.

    So yea, if, anything, this movie made Michael Caine look bad, not Michael Caine was too good for the movie!
    Gee, quite hard to screw it up more than you just have, ain't it pal?
  • vulcancommonsense
    Oh, I disagree completely. First, Christian Bale is the best actor to play Batman/Bruce Wayne in a live action movie. There is a wealth of difference between the three personalities which he cloaks over himself: the public Bruce Wayne is bright and shallow; the private Bruce Wayne is quiet and thoughtful and dedicated to the mission; Batman is the weapon--the quiet Bruce Wayne where all the rage he has is allowed to surface. Second, the fact that Bane was not portrayed as in the comics is not a big deal. In Nolan's mind, Batman is in the real world and so everything is plausible and Bane was scarily plausible--a physically behemoth who possesses a razor intellect and a frightening Occupy-like ideology who HATES Batman. Third, Michael Cain is extremely talented--which is why Alfred is made such an integral part of the trilogy. He is the anchor who helps Bruce keep himself from falling into the abyss.
  • snoofulus
    "There is basically no difference between his portrayal of Bruce Wayne and Batman"
    Lol stopped reading after that.
    I've heard people say he's too dull as Bruce Wayne (since the first movie at least), or that he's too laughable as Batman - but you seem to be MILES away from making reasonable observations of this kind if you can't HOLD THE TWO APART.


    "Bane wasn't portrayed in any sort of resemblance to how he's been shown to be in the last 20 years."
    Lol actually I didn't - but I definitely stopped reading after this one.
    Yea, a character is different from what he was portrayed like in previous media - what a valid argument regarding quality.

    You FAIL.
  • THOOM
    avatar
    "Dark Knight Rises" was awful. Almost 3 hours of morose, depressing, slow moving story. Then it committed the cardinal sin of a truly bad superhero film: No superhero for most of the running time. Even if Catwoman and Joseph Gordon Levitt as Nightwing or Archangel had to take the reins, that would have been fine. But they didn't.

    Instead we got two hours of people dying in between a morose Bruce Wayne and two or three Batman sequences.

    People only praise DKR because it has Chris Nolan's overrated name on it (don't get me started on Memento and Inception) and it is a Nolan Batverse movie.

    This the same phenomena that happened with Episode one. Fans were in denial for years, but now, most people recognize "Episode 1:The Phantom Menace" for the awful movie that it is. That is what eventually will happen with The Dark Knight Rises.

    Catwoman is not a great movie by any stretch of the imagination. But DKR was so horrible, that Catwoman beats it by a mile. Catwoman was something that a superhero movie should strive to be: fun.
  • embercoral  - Seriously?
    avatar
    He's a troll for giving his honest opinion on a movie?

    Well, then I guess NC is King of the Trolls.
  • Moreno X  - to embercoral
    NO! Sad Panda and Welshy are the Kings of Trolls! .... Or Phelous(?)

    Whatever but yah, MaxJayJay is no better troll than NC or anybody of the site.
  • MaxJayJay
    avatar
    I'll vote for Sad Panda as King of Trolls...
  • clearspira  - embercoral
    avatar
    I wish i could upvote comments on this site. These Dark Knight fanboys who immediately shit on anyone who thinks its a bad film piss me off.
  • snoofulus
    I think it's more because he said it's worse than Catwoman, which, well, just looks like a troll comment to most.

    I bet you're so eager to find another instance of "Nolanites jumping on a honest critic" so you can make a snide comment about them, that you've failed to see the sheer absurdity of the comment you're defending :D
    Maybe actually read it next time before deciding to support it just because it (alledgedly) criticizes a Batman film.
  • MaxJayJay
    avatar
    Actually I was saying the guy above me THOOM is a troll,

    but eh whatever...
  • snoofulus
    Well THOOM was just as ridiculous ;)
  • SpeedyEric  - MaxJayJay
    avatar
    My thought exactly.
  • THOOM
    avatar
    Your original post was just being contrary to a guy who simply stated he didn't like the Dark Knight. So does that make you a troll? You know what, actually it does, so I guess we are all trolls. (P.S. - If I was a real troll, I'd be trolling DOUG! It's his page.)
  • MaxJayJay
    avatar
    No idea what you said, but yes we have tolls
  • THOOM
    avatar
    I basically said your post was pointless. Much like yourself. Heh heh heh.
  • thehulk86  - also
    it also committed the single worst sin a batman movie can commit, MAKING BATMAN LOOK WEAK. I know that's what christopher nolan was going for, a batman in a more realistic setting, and this movie showcased the likely physical toll the cowl and all that came with it would take on his body, BUT NO!!!!!! If you're not even gonna have Bane, an iconic villain who's only challenging for batman because he is one of only 2-3 recurring villians who surpass him in physical strength (the others being Killer Croc and maybe clayface, possibly solomon grundy too),BANE I repeat, kick batman's ass because of superior physical strength, and not even include the venom-enhanced muscles? FAIL!!!! Even Joel Schumaker knew enough about batman villians to get that part of bane's character right!
  • MarvelousTK
    what

    Okay, first off, Bane was not challenging to Batman just because he's physically stronger. His original appearance started with him organizing, from the shadows, not revealing himself, a massive crime spree, for the sole purpose of running Batman ragged (after which he used his superior strength to break Batman's back, quite like in the movie actually). Bane is a strategist, a planner, and yet a bit of a nut. Nolan movie actually did that more justice than I expected And... did you say Bane didn't kick Batman's ass in Dark Knight Rises? Again, the broken back thing. Again, also from the comics, so I don't know why it's a 'sin' for it to happen in a movie, too.

    I was actually annoyed by the lack of Venom, too - even think it could have worked in the setting well, with just a bit of tweaking - but I think you just managed to make it better for me, so kudos there! Reminding me of the Schumacher Bane... well I kind of hate you for putting that stupidity back into my head, but on the other hand it comes with the realization that I'm fine giving up the Venom if it means never having to suffer again through Frankenstein's Luchador. Give and take, give and take.
  • snoofulus
    "MAKING BATMAN LOOK WEAK."
    I agree with that - but once again, you're using completely backward arguments to support this viewpoint. In fact, I think you've just reached that reasonable conclusion by sheer accident.

    Why does Batman look weak? BECAUSE HE'S BEEN RETIRED FOR 8- YEARS! He's walking around with a crutch for 30 minutes, and while he does get back into shape surprisingly and unrealistically fast (both times actually) and manages to overpower some henchmen with ease, well... when he faces Bane, the reason he's losing just so desperately seems like his detoriated strength rather than that he's "finally found his match".

    Even Bane says it: "your weakness has cost you your strength" - he's basically become fat and out of shape, and even after he's "risen" a second time, he only wins because he punches Bane in the mask.
    And he still might not have reached his former prowess for all we know.

    So yea... the movie's made him look weak. By... making him weaker than in the previous movies!
    NOT because he's been beaten by a guy without venom enhancers!
    Had they had him in his original shape (heck, maybe even a bit *stronger* for some reason), and then surprisingly lose against Bane, that wouldn't have made him look weak, but rather Bane more terrifying.
    Our Batman's still strong enough, don't worry boys - but keeping up with the more "mature" themes of the film, heroism causes escalation, and "no matter how good you get, there's always someone better than you". Why shouldn't it be the crazy bald maniac who's been born into a prison and shaped by an entire lifetime of hardship and violence?
    The "you just adopted the dark" speech would've have more of an impact then - because that's what it'd actually be, not "you've merely been lying around watching movies for 8 years, if you hadn't I honestly don't know what I'd do now".

    So yes... drop the stupid retirement plot, and you've got Bane beating Batman due to superior muscle strength and fighting prowess, and it WORKS DRAMATICALLY WTIHOUT HIM BEING ON DOPING.

    Your comment about Schumacher suggests that you value a gimmick like "green venom hands" over actual character, because the retarded comedy giant from Bats&Robin certainly didn't match the original in that regard.
    I do like most of that movie btw, it's a lot of fun.
  • snoofulus
    Uh, I do agree that TDKR was a letdown, but it was mostly due to
    1) Execution; a lot of lacklustre scenes inbetween good ones, and some moments of poor acting.
    Batman himself comes off as goofy for the first time (yes, I do dig his voice in the previous two).
    2) Weird decisions like Bruce's retirement / Alfred's resignation that seemed to come out of nowhere. Needless to say, it requires some brilliant execution to sell unconvincing ideas like this, and it didn't have that.

    Like a lot of mediocre (and awful, as well) movies, it really nailed the villain, though - Bane was a fucking awesome piece of genius.


    But... it wasn't due to some nothingsaying structure aspect like "no superhero for x minutes" - sorry that's just dumb. What's with those origin stories that take a while for the superhero to emerge?? The PROTAGONIST was present and that's what counts - him being out of the mask fitted his story arc in the movie.


    "don't get me started on Memento and Inception"
    Inception was a really, really fine piece of entertainment cinema with great atmosphere, but lacklustre (though sufficient) characters.


    "This the same phenomena that happened with Episode one."
    Compare the consistently dull to obnoxious acting in Episode I to the weaker moments of TDKR, and then put a minus in front of the resulting quantity - that'd be my grade for your stupid statement.



    "Catwoman is not a great movie by any stretch of the imagination. But DKR was so horrible, that Catwoman beats it by a mile."
    If, then only in the sense that Catwoman (especially after the critical backlash) will be viewed as fun trash and has less presense overall - while TDKR is to be compared to its predecessors and its weaker moments have less of a "fun factor" to them.

    But yea, just purely on a scale... lol it was a far, far, far better movie than Catwoman.
    Catwoman, to me, seems to fall right in there with a lot of other lame adventure movies - really entertaining villains, stupid goofy over-the-top heroes that aren't quite as good as the villains, and hadly watchable attempts at drama, humor and sentimentality inbetween.
  • Moreno X  - to SpeedyEric
    It's not that we hate DKR or that we bash DKR out of despising it, it's because it was a film that could've been better than what it is. Pretty much that Erod, Doug from his Bum Review, Brad from his Midnight Screening (although I didn't stay longer to finish watching his review because of my tight college studies) has sum up exactly how I felt the same thing after walking out of the theater.

    Mind you, it was the greatest looking-cinematic film and Nolan does hold my attention of the setting, but the story/premise and quite frankly the writing isn't really that good. It was a complicated, confusing movie and I think it could have done better if it can be straight to tell a story and stick to it. Don't get me wrong, I understood the story and the way the story tells, I expected much more than that unfortunately.

    And yes, I think this film did well because, well, it has Nolan's name on it and it seems the Nolan fans - not Batman fans - are really getting butt-hurt whenever half of the majority are speaking their mind about why they felt DKR isn't that great of a movie than everyone else is making of it. Sorry SpeedyEric, that's my cents I could reply to you.

    Do I regretted seeing it in theaters? Not at all my friend! Do I expected better than what I got? Personally speaking, yes.
  • SpeedyEric  - Moreno X
    avatar
    Thank for giving me your two cents, as well as giving some credit to The Dark Knight Rises. Some of the reasons who I love The Dark Knight Trilogy is that the stories are layered and are more focused on Bruce Wayne/Batman than the films fro 1989-1997. Also, I've read a good number of Batman graphic novels to know that the trilogy have a higher respect to the comics that the films from the 80s and 90s.
  • snoofulus
    The TDKR one has two really good scenes imo, her first appearence and "transformation" (even though it's a bit cheesy) and the one where she ambushes Dagget.
    Oh, and the oen in the bar is up there as well now that I think about it (although "Goodwin" ends up getting the biggest laughs in that one).

    Amusing, also very Bond like wit combat in the ball scene, but that one didn't rely on her performance that much.

    The rest I agree was kind of dull and mediocre, and at times really, really corny.
  • Mousy Voice
    avatar
    I'm surprised you reviewed this movie since there had to have been at least two other reviewers on the site who already reviewed this movie. But, as usual, you do an excellent job putting your own unique spin on it. The Catwomen was also hilarious, especially that Dune reference that came out of nowhere.
  • jycool
    Nice review, although, I feel like some of the story was missing from this review.
  • taykel
    I have never seen this film before, but I heard it is one of the worst movies ever made. Good job reviewing it. By the way, the part where you slowly danced with those cat women had me to start burst out laughing.
  • JasonShepard
    Okay, another great review. I probably laughed the most at the lead up to the commercial, but that's just my type of humor, so, yeah.
  • Cubical  - The wall is still blue
    avatar
    The wall is still blue this is good the wall knows when to leave on a high note and end the trilogy unlike starwars.
  • hordrisstheconfuser
    The load rate is so slow. I suppose the site is a victim of its own success.
  • AustKyzor
    avatar
    Oh, PLEASE tell me that one day you'll review Dune!
  • lordmep  - wage gap myth
    Great review, as usual, but it's just so infuriating whenever someone tries passing off the repeatedly disproven gender wage gap as a real issue. The gap exists because it takes the average of all men compared to all women without considering things like job title, hours worked, and a couple dozen other factors. Warren Farrell is one of many who has proven this with his book Why Men Earn More.
  • trlkly
    avatar
    Job title is part of the problem. What you've just said is that women have lower job titles. That's something people hate.

    You have to compare all men to all women to find the discrimination when it comes to what jobs women are allowed to have.
  • lordmep  - wage gap myth
    Except that women are allowed into all the same jobs men are, with the exception of those with the absolute worst working conditions and highest likelyhood of death. I have yet to hear a single call for a quota of women in lumberjacking or coal mining.

    What Warren Farrell did was discover 25 crucial choices which ultimately lead to higher income. Men are more likely than women to make these choices for themselves. Nothing is stoping these women from, say, making the choice to work overtime. Some women do but overall men work a lot more hours per week than women.

    Comparing all men to all women is comparing a CEO to a hair dresser and calling the difference in their pay discrimination. Of course it's discrimination because factors such as hours worked, the difficulty and responsibility required, time spent away from family and so on cannot be considered.
  • 3DMaster
    avatar
    Women are allowed to have all jobs.

    Comparing all men to all women isn't enough fraudulent number massaging; it would produce women making a lot, A LOT more money than men; especially if they reduce it to an average hourly wage.

    No, the only way that feminist frauds can still produce "men earn more than women" is if they comparing LIFETIME EARNINGS. Yeah, only when taking what men and women earned throughout their entire lives do they still manage a slight advantage to men. A say slight, because the 78% claim is still far lower than the actual number as the distance between median male wage and median female wage has increased over the past few decades (in favor of women in case you hadn't figured it out.)

    Funny thing, despite men over their life times earning slightly more; women get to spend 85% of all disposable income. Through alimony, ridiculously high child support from a corrupt family court system, and just plain being with a guy, a woman gets to spend most of the money a man makes.
  • Swanpride
    My sister works in txes, in a job which is still dominated by males...it is NOT dominated by males because fewer woman choose this career, quite the opposite in fact. There are more woman who pass the tests necessarily to reach the title she has. Nevertheless ALL the partners in her firm are male.
    Now, she isn't really interested in becoming a partner in this particular firm, because she doesn't want to do the same thing for the next 30-40 years. She is currently looking for a job which will allow her to develop new abilities. But even if she wanted to: She would never become partner, because the (all male) partners would never consider adding a female to their "old men crowd".
    It's actually the same with ALL my female friends. Lots of female executives in the lower management positions. Nearly none in the higher ones.
    So yes, you can consider the job title, but perhaps you should also ask why the males have the better job title. It's not always because of job performances.
  • AliDraws93  - Losing ten dolars.
    I FUCKING DIDN'T LOSE TEN FUCKING DOLLARS!! !!!
  • SpeedyEric
    avatar
    Oh, you will. ...You will.
  • caligirl
    I did. :(
  • trlkly
    avatar
    I'm normally really good at it, but I'd been laughing so much at the review that I couldn't handle it. I laughed at a part that wasn't even funny.
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