Baby Geniuses

(528 votes, average 4.80 out of 5)

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Comments (439)
  • 80sGuy
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    Oh Gawd, I remember this movie...soooooo stupid. Hilarious Doug.

    I about fell out of chair when you punched that guy in the face.

    I think that large atrium at BabyCo was also used in Rush Hour.
  • ladydiskette
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    Oh sweet Jesus... T__T

    The way they made the babies mouths move was so unnatural it was scary. I almost yearned for the "Look Whose Talking" days when all the voice actor had to do was dub the voice over the babies face and it just looked natural, like the baby was thinking it to himself or herself.

    This was a horrible horrible movie....*raises a collection to pay for Doug's therapy bills after seeing this film*
  • whatever42
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    *adds to the collection for the therapy bills*

    You know, once I saw MikeJ review the sequel to this movie, I knew it was only a matter of time before someone else on the site took care of the original. Of course, considering how bad the sequel was, I could only assume that the original was also just plain terrible in every way as well, although maybe not quite as bad. As it turns out, that was completely correct.

    This movie was just bad, plain and simple. That effect where the "baby" dances was just so obviously bad, it was sickening and those creepy robots were just plain ... creepy. This movie was bad, the review was good, and I hope you enjoyed the rest of the con and recover from this movie Doug.
  • Marshmallowcreampie
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    Think NC will ever review the sequel? Cause I heard it's even worse, if that's possible... One has to wonder, though, was this movie REALLY successful enough to warrant a sequel of any kind?
  • Nitrinoxus
    *adds to therapy fund*

    Horrible, indeed... but the sequel was worse.
  • Pandaboy
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    *adds to therapy fund*

    good gawd was this movie bad!

    oh and those robots gave me nightmares for weeks O_O
  • XMcHARD2
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    this movie has better speech from the babies than the trains in "Thomas and the magical railroad" or whatever its called.
  • death of snipers  - yes, I replyed just to get on this page
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    anyone here go to that convention? Seriously, that would have been fun. anyway, another great review, and here's to doug's thereapy
  • ultramanmattia
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    YES YES YEEES!!!!
    I knew Nostalgia Critic would have reviewed this crapfest someday.
  • SamhainTheDark
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    Critic, I'm sorry, ... ... ... there was a sequel.
  • Dornob
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    You may or may not have caused him to suffer nightmares far worse than the robot scene. I am ashamed.
  • der_ketzer
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    really. And it tops the bottom 100 of the imdb-rating. And there was a review of it on this site already. I think he knows it. But he is afraid. Very afraid.
  • Madara XIII
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    They were FROZEN TODAY!!!
  • Tentacles
    I would rather watch that Hulk Hogan movie than this shit fest.
  • Sheranda
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    I would like to watch Suburban Commando, period.
  • Sheranda  - Fun... Fun... Fun...!
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    What happened to the thumbs up feature?! I want to show praise for comments without having to reply to them! I'll calm down. I'll try. I just need to keep watching these videos.
  • Pandaboy
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    OF COURSE!
  • TheBrigeedaRocks
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    Yes, yes there was.

    Wasn't there one where they had superpowers?
  • shrederman38  - The Sequel
    He is saving that one for Sequel Month 2:The Sequel.
  • Crunchy_Frog  - MikeJ already suffered thru the sequel
    MikeJ already reviewed Baby Geniuses 2, quite recently, under his "Shameful Sequels" category.
  • Tactlesscat
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    Yeah I think he knows, it's why MikeJ stopped doing Shameful Sequels. It was THAT BAD.
  • Floweramon
    So many shows have stopped recently. Shameful Sequels, Masterpiece Fanfic Theater, Until We Win. So sad...
  • RedRed
    Yeah, whats up with that?

    BTW anyone know who that massively overweight man was? the guy from when Dickie was introduced (Mr. Curiuso?) Its really bugging me like I know where he's from.
  • Dwane
    It's Mr. Creosote, from Monty Python's The Meaning of Life.
  • RedRed
    Thanks, I knew I've seen him before.
  • Madara XIII
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    Mwahahahaha yes a sequel of pure fail. XD

    Can't wait to see how he reacts if he reviews it.

    Baby Geniuses 2 DO IT :D
  • ultramanmattia
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    If The Critic did a lovecraftian style of narration,i wonder what he will do when he'll see........ Super Babies!!!!(thunder sounds).
  • archiveit
    I was wondering when you would get around to reviewing this one. Truly one of the worst movies I have ever seen.

    The clips you show, bad as they are, don't even do justice to the epic awfulness of this movie, but your reaction certainly does.
  • Jackass Mask
    We've all had those moments where something has left us wandering, asking the question of "Why?" We wander the halls of school, the mall, a museum, or anywhere that we just happen to be.

    Then comes the stage where we end up just staring at a wall and suddenly it's two hours later. We're not entirely sure why we started staring or what happened around us at the time, but there we are none the less.

    Then, of course, there's the sudden bursts of rage that gets directed at a passerby, sometimes there are no survivors.

    These moments happen at least once in our lives, sometimes more.

    This is a story of when it happened to The Nostalgia Critic...poor bastard.
  • SlyDante
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    - Let me just start by answering everyone's question:

    MIKEJ ALREADY REVIEWED THE SEQUEL.

    You can watch the video(s) under Videos > Team TGWTG > MikeJ TV > Shameful Sequels.

    ...Sorry if the all caps bit sounded dickish, but you just know there were going to be dozens of (unintentional) Douchey McNitpick comments saying "But what about the sequel?? It's like the worst movie ever on IMDB!! We demand you review the sequel soon even though it obviously isn't nostalgic!! Doooom!!"

    I'm not saying NC couldn't review it as well, I'm just pointing out there's no need to comment on the existence of the sequel over & over, & that there's already another review to tide you over for now.

    - I died everytime they mentioned the name "Sly". Seriously, bits of me just rotted up out of embarassment.

    - Which is creepier: Photoshopped talking baby or animatronic giant baby? Discuss.

    - Incidentally, the animatronic clown just edged out the baby in terms of being the most nightmare-inducing for me. And given that I still haven't gotten the horror of DuckTits out of my mind yet, I can look forward to some creepy-ass s*** in my head tonight during sleep...

    - Ah, that wall really did seem like a source of relief & enlightenment...Unfortuna tely, it was a wall that had been exposed to A Troll in Central Park after Doug said walls would be the only ones who might find it entertaining. Needless to say, they had to cut the footage of the wall exacting it's revenge on Doug (it got even rougher once the wall found out what movie he was associating it with THIS time).

    - Also, what the hell actually made these babies "geniuses"? It didn't seem like they did much more than any human of average intelligence could (save for the language, I guess). Maybe some better dexterity, but how does that make someone a genius?


    ...All in all, the narrative gimmick did take some getting used to (Doug, were you having vocal problems again?), but it was still a damn fine review. ^_^
  • Moreno X
    The only thing I can say, and I say for everyone who just watch this video including you Doug, is this:

    I WAS FROZEN TODAY!!

    Do I need to say more?

    Doug, take care of yourself. And thanks for the review, it was great.
  • damonstein
    Love the part at the end when you address the crowd. i was expecting the joke but it was still hilarious.
  • SpeedyEric
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    At last, Doug. You have made a review on one of the worst movies of all time. Now, if someone else would review the even crapier sequel that still remains strong at the top of IMDB’s Bottom 100.

    Awesome idea on the story set around this review at Animarathon, and nice use of the music from “The Truman Show.” I really need to get that movie on DVD.

    Why, Bob Clark? Why must you have gone from cinematic genius to cinematic WTF?

    3:07- I understand that this is exposition for the audience who are seeing this film. …Wait, WHAT audience?

    The giant baby robot can give The Garbage Pail Kids a run for what little amounts of money they have.

    I think Kim Cattrall in this movie would be more convincing if she was playing a 40-something whore who has sex with any attractive man she lays eyes on. …Yes, I know what I said, and you don’t have to remind me.

    9:28- “Star Trek: The Original Series” is king, where the Baby Geniuses movies are the crazy homeless people you see living behind a bar/strip club.

    13:05- In speaking of which, the first joke-ruining jack@$$ just turned into a stunt double.

    This. Movie. Is. Just. …Oykavancka pointalicka sonofa biteinthe assininepieceof crapplesackof (Takes a dose of crazy pills). …It’s the devil.

    Awesome review. This goes right next to you review of “Garbage Pail Kids,” which is my favorite Nostalgia Critic episode.

    Bonus: I should note that I saw the ending of this movie, and one of tha babies broke the fourth wall by saying there would be a sequel, and I don't think I should say more about that.
  • pap64
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    Mike J, aka British Person, already took care of the sequel
  • SpeedyEric
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    Thanks for the heads up, dude. ;)
  • Moreno X
    And he did. It was the best that Mike J took care of the sequel than letting NC suffer for a second round. I wouldn't imagine twice of seeing Doug torture himself once more.
  • SpeedyEric
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    Yeah. It would be like when Phelous had to review all those movies with the word "pulse."
  • Sheranda  - At last?
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    Uh, SpeedyEric? Wouldn't you say that Batman & Robin, Battlefield Earth, Garbage Pail Kids, Neverending Story III, Biodome, and North are also some of the worst movies of all time? Why did you say that first paragraph as if this is the first really bad movie he did?

    By the way, why was the Critic at an anime convention? Didn't Doug say that Cowboy Bebop is the only anime he liked? It makes about as much sense as Spike TV hosting video game awards.
  • Tentacles
    It makes more since than this crappy movie. I think that might of been the point.
  • SpeedyEric
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    What I was meaning to say is that "Baby Geniuses" as of today is #70 in IMDB's Bottom 100. I'm looking at the list as I'm writing this, and I see that "Chairman of the Board" is at #63, "Alone in the Dark" at #74, "Cool as Ice" at #75, "Battlefield Earth" at #84, and "Kazaam" at #93. I also agree that the other movies you listed are pieces of cinematic garbage, but it's movies like these that diserved to be reviewed.
  • Sheranda
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    Okay. I understand now.
  • Galactic_Muffin
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    Yes, the Fillip Glass Truman music the first thing I noticed (great music and great movie). untill he said Animarathon. o_O And then I remembered he was going to be there that week. My apartment is right behind the hotel he stayed at XD I missed the panel though. :(
  • Dark Crow I  - Awesome
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    Awesome review of an awful movie. This movie was without a doubt one of the dumbast nostalgic films and I truly feel bad that you needed to watch it to give us your review.
  • Zap42
    I remember seeing this movie as a kid and somewhat enjoying it. But over the years my memory of it has confused me more and more to the point that i actually wanted to see it again just to know what the fuck i had seen...luckily you did an amazing review on it before i had to resort to that. Thank you for saving me, and the different style of this vid was great (especially the last wall gag)
  • Sheranda
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    I also saw this movie as a kid. It was kind of boring. What's strange is that I don't remember it scarring me.

    Looking back, I guess Hollywood got tired of making animals talk, so they went on to making babies talk. They probably thought it would be cute. They probably also thought it would be the closest thing they would get to making a live action movie of the very successful and very popular at the time Rugrats. Can you imagine a live action Rugrats movie?

    Why am I so talkative today?
  • Taufiq91
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    When i was a kid i fucking hated this movie. it made no sense, it was creepy and it killed my childhood perception of Christopher Lloyd.

    And it was one of the films that i think deserves a Nostalgia Critic review and i've been requesting it for months. And since today's my Birthday, this might the coolest birthday present i've ever gotten by the Nostalgia Critic. Thank you, Doug & Co. for this review.

    Oh, and Suzumiya Haruhi cosplay cameo at 4:57. nice.
  • TheAngryAnimeAddict
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    I remember seeing posters for this movie. It looked like an innocent family film to me, and I didn't want to see it. Oh god How wrong I was, this was shit.
  • Sheranda
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    You were right in not wanting to see it.
  • LockeMuhe  - *DEAD*
    You killed me critic, not just from this movie, but from you scaring the Vocaloid Kaito at 7:03. Nevertheless, I still can't believe you reviewed this crap of a movie.
  • Bad Boy 75
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    THIS MOVIE IS EVIL!!!!!!!!!!
  • Annie-Mae
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    You have nothing to say...but you'll still talk about it...? I like the artsy style you got going here...so much more mellow.

    Oh I'm accentually liking the scenes I see of Christopher Lloyd. It's a shame he's in here but he's totally awesome.

    You need to put that baby next to the Arnold baby. They make some good nightmare fuel together.

    I was happier before I even saw these clips...And honestly from the things and clips I've seen from A Christmas Story (never seen it all the way through either), the odd nature of this film is no surprise. I wasn't in love with that film either...

    Oh thank you Vigo!! XD That made it all better.

    FUKIN CLOOOWWNNN!! > http://www.youtube.com/ watch?v=RbC_HNHQ9JY (the youtube link might be dead sometime in the future, but Go watch Animaniacs Clown And Out...Yeah that's how I feel about that clown :X)
  • AMPolino
    avatar
    My God, just seeing the clips from this film brought me into a state of grim, voice-over-narrative depression like the Critic suffered. I remember the TV ads for the movie which actually declared the movie "A live action Rugrats"...Translation: "Cash-in".

    Though I was pleased that not one clip from the movie registered in my memory. I did see this movie once when it came out on video, but my brain has successfully erased all memory of that viewing. It felt like a review to a movie I'd never seen before (even though I know I did).

    And oh my. A whole review devoted exclusively to how the movie left the Nostalgia Critic with no creativity, drained his brain, and left him a bitter mass of rage and depression. What hell this must have been for Doug and Rob to try and write jokes for. This can't possibly be another "Garbage Pail Kids", but the review really brings across a sense of helplessness against the movie's hollow stupidity and abysmal badness. Might this at least be another "Junior"? Perhaps a "Bio-Dome"?
  • Moreno X
    I would bet if Baby Geniuses could beat Garbage Pail Kids as the "true" worst movie ever made, but I can't. Why? Because there are other worst films out there that they're in a competition to be known as the worst to ever drain our intelligences that was given to us to avoid seeing another worst material from a worst film. I think that is how today's hollywood sees that sadly. How unfortunate the bastards at hollywood are throwing their credibility to tease at us as moviegoers. Very sad it is.
  • Seamusowns
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    The sequel is fucking awful.....
  • SanJ922  - WHY?!?!?!?!?
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    Why does Christopher Lloyd look like Lenin?!?!?!?
  • element_wind91
    Hey Doug, I agreed with everything said about this horrid movie. I was the girl at Animarathon in the autograph line in the poofy blue dress. xD It was awesome to meet you!
  • Galactic_Muffin
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    Hey! you go to BG too huh? Unfortunately, I missed his panel I was at columbus at the time :(
  • Katze
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    this movie makes me fart jelly beans and poop sunshine. GREAT REVIEW!
  • pap64
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    WOW...

    Wow...

    I've never seen the movie before because I kept hearing how bad it was. Now that I saw the review of it I am stunned at how bad it is.

    First of all, the whole "babies being geniuses at birth" thing is one of the most poorly conceived concepts I have ever seen in any piece of fiction. If babies were indeed born smart they would have spoken clear English, learn to walk and, hell, no longer depend on their parents for food and shelter. Yes, I KNOW that fiction is about the impossible, but the impossible must somehow make sense to the audience, even if its silly and out there. This baby geniuses ideas is just a load of crap someone lazily came up.

    Then the digital effects...man are they some of the worst ever seen on film. I mean, you can TELL that the babies were giggling and laughing throughout the whole thing. You thinking adding CG and pasting their heads on CG bodies is going to do the trick? Hell no, it just makes things worse. It pulls people out of the movie. That's what effects are supposed to do, pull people in.

    The characters are also obnoxious as all hell. The babies are not adorable, they are annoying in their "witty" banter. You wanna know why Rugrats was so great when it came out? Because the babies ACTED LIKE BABIES! None of these smartass insults or anything like that, they were babies. They were charming and endearing. Baby Geniuses isn't in any way or form cute.

    In fact...I feel its a movie made with hate. The concept sounds like something a bitter kid would write after being grounded. That's why it sits with me so badly: it is just despicable on every level.

    Horrible, horrible movie... XO
  • Esteban
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    I remember seeing this because my younger sister said what a great movie it was. Considering her taste in movies, that should have been my first clue that this movie would blow. It was painful to watch.
  • Suren2
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    There's a good reason I avoided this movie like the plague when it was out. "Look Who's Talking" did the whole "talking babies" schtick earlier and better.
  • JSleeper
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    Look Who's Talking is a far, far better movie than this... thing.

    I enjoyed this variation on your normal review format, Doug. It helps keep things fresh (the Hunter Thompson review of They're Back! is another great example)
  • Sheranda
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    I figured it out! That is a picture of Dr. Clayton Forrester from Mystery Science Theater 3000! Am I right?
  • JSleeper
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    Yes, that's him. :) Not my drawing, but I thought it was appropriate for this site.
  • Robt915  - Jesus
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    I remember this movie it was so stupid and weird.
  • SerenityMoonstone
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    My reaction to the big baby...what...the...fuck. ..just very slowly, what the fuck?

    No, this movie was made for people who want to torture themselves.

    Hey look it Kaito...sorry, had to point him out...

    I like those commercials, I think they're cute, not convincing or anything, just cute. But at least they're not trying to fucking dance around and shit.

    I think the baby actually thought he was being yelled at.

    Wow...another movie where just the review literally hurts me. Literally, I felt pain watching this.
  • edjr1980
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    Why did they make this movie again...? oh yea. $$$
  • Quantum Wolf
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    It's really sad that the guy who made A Christmas Story made this. It's like John Hughes 2.0
  • Sheranda
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    And Don Bluth.
  • Kheldarn
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    What's really sad is that Superbabies was Bob Clark's last movie before he was killed. :(
  • YetAnotherGeek
    ...Interesting style choice, but funny review.

    Too bad the sequel is past your cutoff date; that movie is considered one of the worst in all of history. Yowza...well, I guess the Shameful Sequels review will have to do.
  • Minion of Yahtzee  - It gets worse
    avatar
    I was looking online about this hellspawn, there is going to be a third movie. A THIRD MOVIE!!! KILL KILL KILL THEM ALL, oh god i've got a headache!
  • TheDued92
    avatar
    Who is the geniuses that thought this was a good idea.
  • Moreno X
    My guess is: the same monkeys who wrote for Secret of NIMH 2.
  • genebaker511
    Nah, only Dr. Insano AKA Spooney and Dr. Smith AKA Spider-Smith can only think of something more diabolical than monkeys could.
  • IXOHOXI
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    True, monkeys end up just writing mediocre junk; this was a product of _PURE_EVIL_!!!!_
  • WiiStation360
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    My guess is babies, hence the name.
  • KRTellez
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    My guess it's the boy parent's. Who doesn't want to see her/his little girl/boy in the big screen and scream it outloud.
    Until you see the actual movie of course
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