All this talk about stuff and no mention of George Carlin :(
Waterworld
Tuesday, 30 November 2010 23:03
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Comments (622)
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11.30.2010 - 23:05 | Mr Clock
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12.01.2010 - 01:08 | thatguyfromlondonikr its really a kick in the balls. I mean he could have talked for like hours about him
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12.02.2010 - 04:57 | TeaHound
You know, the people who complain about people who post 'first' are just as annoying as the people who actually post 'first'. =)
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12.02.2010 - 14:55 | keda
Because recursiveness is cool! :D
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12.03.2010 - 00:50 | JeauxMeauxSome people find people who complain about people complaining about people who say first to be equally annoying. =D
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12.21.2010 - 11:22 | DaBirdthen aren't you kind of a hypocrite? I'm just saying...
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01.16.2011 - 15:24 | Hotdogmarchant
This is why you ignore the "First" people. It just creates an endless cycle of douches.
And I fear I'm now a part of that cycle.
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02.28.2011 - 00:17 | Sheranda
It's kind of like writing on the restroom wall "Stop writing on the walls!"
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12.01.2010 - 17:16 | WerewolfRiverWill the Nostalgia Critic ever review The Postman?
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12.01.2010 - 22:03 | pinkwerewolf
The Postman Always Rings Twice.... is much worse buddy.
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12.01.2010 - 19:31 | uknownadaHe was such an overrated comedian.
I know I'm going to get probably the lowest rated comment in the history of this site, but I stand by my opinion. I don't know why so many people like him. All of his jokes are forced, and sometimes don't make sense. I've never found anything funny about him, and I don't know why other people do.
I await your thumb downs.
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12.01.2010 - 20:06 | BISlover4412Don't worry this isn't Youtube. Most places people are allowed to have an opinion!
I don't agree with you, but hey, you aren't being a troll. Never be afraid to express your opinion.
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12.01.2010 - 22:05 | pinkwerewolf@uknownada (aka nobody)
Yeah yeah, you're a d-bag. Go back to troll land. Blah blah blah.
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12.02.2010 - 08:16 | uknownadaOf course. I MUST be a d-bag! How dare I express my opinion. I should be hung for not liking George Carlin. Thank you, pinkwerewolf. You've made me feel so guilty that I guess I'll have to go back to Troll Land and express my opinion there. I am such a d-bag.
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12.02.2010 - 15:57 | The_CoolerKingNot hung, just shot repeatedly in the head.
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12.01.2010 - 22:39 | Shinra_BanshouI didn't think George Carlin was funny so much as he was a genius. I don't laugh to his comedy, I nodd to it. It's good that you're not afraid of expressing a controversial opinion and not being in people's faces about it as well.
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12.02.2010 - 14:16 | BirdofPreyi'll give you a thunbs up fella.
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12.02.2010 - 21:55 | tailman8079so stop watching it.
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12.03.2010 - 18:18 | uknownada*sigh* The "don't like it don't watch it" argument. The most idiotic argument EVER!
First of all, since he's dead, I can't really watch anything new from him anymore.
Second, I kind of HAVE to watch him in order to judge him if he's good or not. How do you morons with that argument not get that?
Third, I don't watch him. Because I don't like him. I never said I kept watching him.
I really wish the idiots who think the "don't like it don't watch it" argument would put a little bit of logic into it, as you HAVE to watch something to judge if you like it or not!
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12.01.2010 - 23:35 | ScrungeMcDuke
As a comedian, it's uncouth to hack another comedian. You can't hack someone like George Carlin and get away with it. The best comedians have ORIGINAL material, not stuff quoted (or stolen) from other comedians.
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12.14.2010 - 19:46 | Marshmallowcreampie
Wait, was George Carlin in this?!
I watched part of this movie on TV once. (This was before I had cable TV. I was bored; don't judge me!) It was pretty bad. My biggest problem was Kevin Costner's character. He was so facepalmingly unlikable, it's like the writer(s) WANTED the viewer to hate him. I mean, the setting of the story was okay, and it could've been a pretty cool story in the hands of some good writers, but this was just poorly executed.
NC, the review was funny, but there was one little thing you got wrong: you said it didn't make even close to the budget amount. That's only if you count how much in made in the US. Worldwide, it made just enough money to keep from being a complete flop.
On a side note, here's a little fun fact: Even if all the ice in the polar caps and whatnot melted, the Earth still wouldn't be entirely flooded. Many coastlines would be, but most of the land would remain intact.
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06.29.2011 - 21:27 | da_nooblet
"WE NEED MORE STUFF!"
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11.30.2010 - 23:06 | Jackass Mask
I too like the many technical aspects of this world. And, honestly, I really don't mind this movie. I watch it when it's on TV all the time. It's one of those films I can enjoy for the idea put behind it and the other things on screen that work where Costner's acting fails.
And I'm sure plenty of people will point this out, it only cost so much because the original set sunk and they had to rebuild it while also paying the actors to stick around. This brought the film horridly over budget and pushed the schedule far behind. They should have just scrapped it after the set sinking, but Costner pushed the studio to keep with it with the promise that it would make it's money back. The morale is that you should never listen to Costner...then they made The Postman. Idiots!
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The Postman was a sci fi book that had cyborgs and other hi tech stuff in it. Guess what the movie had none of that stuff in it and was complelty not the book.
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You know what, I actually liked the Postman! There! I said it! It was a strange mad max post apocalyptic role playing game I would play with friends!! ^_^ (admit it, you would too)
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12.07.2010 - 15:03 | Captain SnagglefartWould it have been good if it did have that stuff in it?
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11.30.2010 - 23:18 | Darrell Kaiser“It didn’t even come close to making its money back?” It made over $260 million dollars worldwide on a $175 million dollar budget. Double check your statistics and NO MORE COSTNER BASHING, unless it's The Postman. Haha. Also, did Scott Sebring and his crew approve of their image use as the Trekkies?
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11.30.2010 - 23:27 | Dr. Whiggs
Why is this guy getting down-voted? Because he pointed out a fact? Because he likes Costner? Why?
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12.01.2010 - 01:37 | Vikeif
cause he presents this point like a fanboy ass, and though he maybe right, he still will be flamed.
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12.01.2010 - 02:36 | Darrell KaiserHow do you think the filmmakers of these films feel when they see people like the Nostalgia Critic tear it apart? But, I gotta admit, he was pretty nice about it all at the end. Why should he be null and void of any sort of criticism?
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12.01.2010 - 06:06 | SsnakeBite
Dude, EVERY artist is going to be criticized. If it really hurts their feelings that much that an Internet comedian is making fun of their movie, they shouldn't bother making them in the first place. It's just the way it goes, the whole idea of being an artist means everything you do will depend on public reaction. I'm not saying they shouldn't be disappointed or even pissed when they get bad press, but if they can't move on, they simply don't have the qualifications to be artists. And finally, I'll ask you the same question you asked: why should Costner be devoid of any sort of criticism?
Also, if you don't like people bashing movies... why do you watch an Internet show about just that?
And to be honest Darell, you were being kind of a dick with your post above. Maybe that's not what you meant, but it came across as if you were essentially saying "stop disagreeing with me! And how dare you make a tiny mistake that has no bearing on the actual review (and that may not even be a mistake due to the reasons Bass, ChaosBladewing and tootired mentioned)?"
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12.01.2010 - 13:44 | axlryder
You're right that no artist should be exempt from criticism, but to simply thumb someone up or down because they agree or disagree with the critic goes against that very principle. I have yet to find a solid source that claims this movie was a bomb; the general consensus I've found in looking is that the label is a misnomer. While people may just not like Darrell's attitude, when others are generally getting thumbs up for conflicting counterarguments supporting the critic than I can't help but notice the favoritism. Thumb me down if you want, but I'm not being mean, I can support my claims, and since Chaosblade wing, Bass and the others are simply stating the inverse argument of my own with little variation then I see no reason why people would thumb me down outside of pure bias.
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12.01.2010 - 12:59 | Darrell KaiserI keep watching because I'm hoping he'll get his shit together and give us something that is on the caliber of the great Battlefield Earth review, but that was mostly because of Spoony.
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12.01.2010 - 13:59 | mrrubino
It was kinda funny at first. But then you kept replying and we realized you were serious. And then it wasn't funny anymore.
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12.01.2010 - 18:37 | TheCooper
Yeah tell that to every comedian out their. Everyone's gotta insult something sometimes.
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12.02.2010 - 09:54 | veddabredda
@SsnakeBite
And is the Nostalgia Critic not an artist in his own right? Does he not therefore accept the possibility of being criticised himself? Why should the Nostalgia Critic be devoid of any sort of criticism?
Oh, and your comment: "Also, if you don't like people bashing movies... why do you watch an Internet show about just that?" You might as well say, "If you don't like Waterworld, then why did you watch it?" Or I might as well say "If you don't like internet commenters, why do you read internet comments?"
---
Anyway, some serious respect to the "Hurroo" joke. I've been saying that to my non-Blackadder-watching friends for too long, and now maybe they'll get it.
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12.01.2010 - 07:28 | QuestionTheMajority
Sounds like Tommy Wiseau's "why eez evreebodee peeking on my mawvee" bullcrap finally got to somebody. Everyone in the entertainment biz knows that you're going to take some flak for your failures. If you can't stand the heat, then get out of the kitchen.
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12.14.2010 - 19:51 | MarshmallowcreampieAgreed. Criticism is what you need to improve. If no one gives you a critique, tells you what is wrong, you'll never be able to fix whatever problems you have with your art. Some people *cough*TommyWiseau*cough* aren't too good at accepting that there may be major flaws in their work, but others (like Halle Berry) will admit they've made mistakes. (Halle Berry was one of the few people to show up to the Golden Raspberry Awards to accept their trophy. Another reason I think she's a goddess XD ) Even NC will release his "Top 11 Fuckups" videos to admit and apologize for his errors. (another reason I think he's a god XD )
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12.01.2010 - 19:32 | Darrell KaiserHave you forgotten what he said in his first Fuck-Ups video? “If I ever make a mistake, don’t ever be afraid to bring it up. It’s the only way I’ll ever learn. Just don’t be a Grade-A asshole, like Douchy McNitpick here.” I didn’t call him names or say he should die for making this mistake in my post, so why all of this hostility?
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12.02.2010 - 02:54 | Semudara
Because people can be douches. And then you decided to join them:
"I keep watching because I'm hoping he'll get his shit together and give us something that is on the caliber of the great Battlefield Earth review, but that was mostly because of Spoony."
...so you get NO sympathy from me.
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12.02.2010 - 21:14 | Darrell KaiserSo, voicing an opinion over someone's work is looked down upon? Then why do YOU visit this website?
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12.03.2010 - 22:08 | DwaneHave you ever heard of constructive criticism? It's where you look at something critically and give feedback to help the person improve. Visiting the artist's own website and then saying his work was only good because of the other artist in it is really quite douchy and is considered trolling. If you want to engage in not-so-constructive criticism, do it in your own space, not his.
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12.01.2010 - 01:56 | Bass
Because his "fact" is nonsense. "$260 million back on a $175 million movie"? Only if the theaters get nothing from the ticket sales, and marketing is free.
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12.01.2010 - 05:08 | axlryderHe never said it made that much back, that's simply how much the movie reeled in. All in all it came a lot closer to breaking even than many, many other big budget movies in the past.
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12.01.2010 - 05:10 | PLAMostly for "NO MORE COSTNER BASHING", I imagine. Shades of "leave Britney Spears alone".
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12.01.2010 - 07:30 | QuestionTheMajority"Shades of Leave Britney Spears Alone" is now going to be the name of the psychedelic punk emo metal band I form when I get around to it. Or the psychedelic punk emo metal movie I make. Either way, it'll rock hardcore and cut its own wrists to make people feel bad about it.
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If you're doing the movie, I'd recommend asking Brendan Small, co-creator and co-composer for Metalocalypse, to help you. That show is great, no matter what Marzgurl says!
I barely remember Waterworld. I'll have to check it out again.
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12.01.2010 - 12:56 | Darrell KaiserAt least I'm defending a winner of an Academy Award, instead of some burned out pop star, who was only popular when she was a teenager. Did you also catch that I wrote "unless it's The Postman." Obviously, I'm not setting him up on that high of a pedestal.
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12.01.2010 - 14:38 | Dreadwing
"LEAVE KEVIN ALONE"
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12.01.2010 - 18:39 | TheCooperSeriously?
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02.28.2011 - 00:59 | SherandaAre you people still posting about Kevin Costner? Whether he's good or not, give it a rest!
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Yeah, I can wiki too dude.
It did bomb with only a paltry 88 million in the US, and only made a profit after is worldwide release, VHS, and DVD sales. That gives it a 57% profit margin for its entire existence, which is mediocre at best for a film that had the hype this one had, and frankly there are better ways to invest 175 million and get much better returns.
Edit: Hell, doing a bit more on the wiki, I found that 150 million in "The Last Airbender" can get you 310 million gross with no DVD sales yet, and 200 million in "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" can get you 800 million gross.
Now that should keep you up nights :P
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Yeah it took like a decade to make it's money back. Also the budget doesn't have the advertising costs. So it did bomb and was one of the worst flops in movie history.
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12.01.2010 - 02:32 | Darrell KaiserI believe the Nostalgia Critic is confusing this film with The Postman. That was the Costner film that didn't make dick. I hope he'll get around to reviewing it one of these days.
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but if you're comparing both Airbender and Revenge of the Fallen to WaterWorld...
I'd rather pick the movie where a guy drinks his own piss than two movies that were written in piss, but to top it off, also proofread, spellchecked, and drafted by being wiped on the ass of a greedy producer.
FML, i was born during This era of blockbuster dreamkilling movies. :'''(
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12.02.2010 - 02:00 | 13secondstomidnight
Wait, wait, wait...... Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen made HOW MUCH???
Okay, that's it. Reality now officially makes less sense than any given Michael Bay movie. I'll be in the nearest mental institution. Someone come get me when the apocalypse is over and flying dolphins rule the earth.
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12.14.2010 - 19:53 | MarshmallowcreampieI know it's not related to the video, but... THE LAST AIRBENDER MADE $310 MILLION?!?!?! *bashes own head against the wall*
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02.28.2011 - 01:03 | SherandaI'm with you. If you watched every episode of the series like I did, you would find the movie boring and uncomfortable.
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12.01.2010 - 01:15 | axlryderyeah this movie definitely made its money back, it's on the wiki and everything. Also, to chaosblade wing, the word "bomb" implies huge losses, so this clearly wasn't a bomb. Just because the international sales helped to boost its profit doesn't mean that profit doesn't count. An example of a real bomb might be zyzzyz Road, which made 30 dollars on a 1.2 million dollar budget, and no that's not a typo.
Also, the directors cut did clear up a lot of the plot holes in the film (not all, but a lot of them)
All in all, it seems like a decent film and all of the STUFF actually looked kind of cool.
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12.01.2010 - 01:57 | Jillers
When people say a movie "bombed" they tend to specifically refer to its theatrical run.
Waterworld bombed. It didn't come close to making back its investments until its international release, which generally isn't cared or talked about when producers think of what actually makes them money. ie: money is the short term > money in the long term
tl;dr you're arguing over semantics. You knew what the critic meant. Don't be a dick.
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12.01.2010 - 05:24 | axlryderlook at this list
http://en.wikipedia.org/ wiki/ List_of_biggest_box_offic e_bombs (erase the spaces)
Now look back at me
now back at the list
now back at me
it's not on the list. But it could be on the list if it had lost more money. I'm on a laptop.
(also, no, the domestic release is not exclusively calculated when referring to a movie's overall take)
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12.02.2010 - 18:18 | Morgoth Bauglir
That is a BRIEF list!
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12.03.2010 - 22:47 | DwaneI remember when this movie came out critics kept calling it a bomb because of it's poor reception. I also remember reading much later, in an article about the top box office bombs, that Waterworld did eventually scratch enough money together to cover production, disqualifying it from that list, even though most people not only think of it as a bomb, but use it as an example of a bomb. Unless someone was a real fan of Waterworld, or read the same article I did, this is not common knowledge. You have to be quite a McNitpick to be digging up stuff like this and defending it so fiercely.
Long story short, when Waterworld came out, it was a bomb. Overseas receipts and DVD/VHS sales eventually moved it into the black.
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12.14.2010 - 19:57 | MarshmallowcreampieActually, producers have been caring more about international audiences lately. I don't know if they did when this movie was made; but I read one article that said one reason the successful-in-America film "Anchorman" didn't get a sequel was because it did poorly with the international audience. On top of that, some films have been using more actors that have some recognition in other countries in order to boost international sales. (sorry if I'm sounding like a trivia Nazi XD )
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02.28.2011 - 01:05 | SherandaThank you, Jillers! Just what I was thinking.
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12.01.2010 - 01:54 | BassThe raw numbers themselves don't mean anything, because the studio doesn't get it all back. When this movie was made, the studios usually got something like 80-90% of the first domestic box office weekend, with a shrinking proportion for each following weekend. Then figure that they likely only got about 20-40% of the foreign gross, and add in marketing costs.
The result? This movie didn't even come close to making its money back.
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12.01.2010 - 14:43 | DreadwingYou guys are missing the obvious: Money != good/bad. Even if the movie made double its costs, that doesn't make it a good movie. Like NC said, it's just bland. Not awesome, not so-bad-it's-awesome... just bland. And to me, bland is the worst. I enjoy Batman and Robin in a sick way because it's so over-the-top stupid it's perfect for Riff Night. I don't think we could riff a movie as boring as Waterworld.
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12.01.2010 - 14:52 | mrskippy
Except it went over-budget.
FAIL.
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11.30.2010 - 23:07 | StarShineDC
I would LOVE a "Stuffstuffstuffstuffstuf fstuffstuffstuffstuff STU-UUUUUFF" ringtone XD
Also, Kevin Costner made the little girl seem more interesting and she was as bland as a chia pet!!
I mean... You REALLY have to be JUST THAT BAD. And WHY was old dude the only one who could read the tattoo on her back? And HOW did that tattoo make it there in a freaking WORLD OF WATER?!
Though, I did absolutely love this review. The dolphin sound cracks me up every single time :D
And the Super Mario Bros clips make me want to go and watch that review too. MONKEY.
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I know I might get shot down for saying this, but I LOVE STUFF! I mean Waterworld. I don't think it's the greatest movie ever made, but I do think it's a fun and exciting movie with a fun plot. I very much enjoy it. However, that's just my opinion, even though I'm right...I mean, my opinion...yeah! ;-)
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11.30.2010 - 23:10 | MrKnockout
*bang* *bang*
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11.30.2010 - 23:19 | KingGramJohnsonI've been shot...man, I wish I didn't share my opinion on TGWTG.com!
*Dies an honorable death*
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11.30.2010 - 23:41 | flaming snack
thare is othing rong with stuff it just stuff but it wold be beter if it was shinig stuff
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12.01.2010 - 00:06 | Joker Jr.
You know, I don't get it. You know the Smokers, well...where on Earth are they getting all the stuff. The bullets and cigarets and fuel and...oh, wait...I forgot to turn off my brain; just one moment:
*click*
durrr...prerdie stouph..ljfjfupo.kljsdjg; 23
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12.01.2010 - 13:16 | axlryder@flamingsnack I don't know what I find stranger, the way this comment is written, or the fact that I actually understand it.
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11.30.2010 - 23:09 | SNES guy
Waterworld was a okay movie when it came out but now with avatar its terrible
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12.01.2010 - 07:05 | dennett316
What the hell does the release of a film over a decade later have to do with the quality (or lack thereof) of Waterworld?
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02.28.2011 - 01:08 | SherandaAgreed, Stewie. That made little sense.
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11.30.2010 - 23:09 | montanker
I never noticed that the Universal logo didn't have any clouds before! Damn, now I'm gonna notice that every time I see it!
Come to think of it, there's no moon either...
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02.28.2011 - 01:24 | SherandaSpeaking of that logo, I like the way it was used in this movie. Also the moon is not seen, because it is nearly two hundred fifty thousand miles away from Earth. That's about two thousand moons away. Sorry I couldn't find a shorter way of explaining that.
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11.30.2010 - 23:57 | killerofswedes
Water sucks it rly rly sucks, water sucks it rly rly suuuuuuuucks!
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11.30.2010 - 23:12 | spine_42
Kevin Cosner can eat a dick
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12.01.2010 - 22:14 | pinkwerewolf.... really? I mean really you just said that "spine_42"? You know, Kevin made some really awesome flicks too. Check out Dances With Wolves okay?
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02.28.2011 - 01:26 | SherandaPlease, don't start again! The first two hundred comments said enough about Kevin Costner!
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i love the stuff parts. i've seen this movie and u make it enjoyable to watch. and that little girl was annoying.
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03.03.2011 - 22:03 | SherandaThat little girl was Tina Majorino, better known as Deb in Napoleon Dynamite.
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11.30.2010 - 23:15 | mx1349
STUFF!
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11.30.2010 - 23:55 | Lodeman AKA LARUCUS
...... FOOD!!!!!!!!!!
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11.30.2010 - 23:16 | Johnny Gan and Pongo
I remember what the Nerd said: "I'd rather drink Kevin Costner's recycled piss water."
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11.30.2010 - 23:17 | NCscriticI'm sorry, but this greyed out commenter thought that Doug's frequent pleasure of a child being smacked was a bit disturbing. I don't care how annoying or bland her character was, finding joy in a little girl being hit is just wrong.
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11.30.2010 - 23:21 | darkmindedsith
"Anything can be funny" - George Carlin
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12.01.2010 - 16:19 | NCscriticyes, because, stand up comedians are always dead serious. they never, oh I don't know, tell jokes?
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12.01.2010 - 23:28 | darkmindedsithSo you feel that comedians do not always literally think what they say and use exaggerations for comedic purposes?
Hmm, funny, because that's exactly what Doug did in this review- the very issue you have a problem with...
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12.01.2010 - 23:35 | NCscritictouche.
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12.01.2010 - 07:07 | dennett316Annoying kids getting hurt is the very foundation of comedy.
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12.01.2010 - 16:12 | NCscriticyou've shown me the light and I've seen the error of my ways. I will keep this brilliant piece of advice in mind if I ever meet your child.
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12.01.2010 - 23:04 | Chris P Bacon
Did you just go from "even a movie villain pretending to hit a fictional girl is wrong" to "I'm going to hit your child if I ever see him"?
You, sir, are a hypocrite and an idiot.
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12.01.2010 - 23:33 | NCscriticI didn't say that scene was wrong. I said Doug enjoyed it too much.
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12.03.2010 - 14:38 | LHGdennett316 has a point. Look at The Simpsons and Homer strangling Bart. Or most movies with kid stars in which the annoying kid gets whalloped in the end. Heck even got a laugh out of the Jimmy Kimmel sketch where Supernanny tosses a brat over roof ledge just because you know no one gets hurt and at some point we all want to smack the annoying brats of the world.
Back to NC, STUUUUUUUUUUFF!
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12.01.2010 - 07:34 | QuestionTheMajorityNCscritic clearly hasn't spent a lot of time around children.
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12.01.2010 - 16:10 | NCscriticI have a 13 year old brother. you don't think I don't know how irritating and down right infuriating children can be? it's the people who give in to their primal instincts to beat them up (probably sending them to the hospital) that get arrested for child abuse. but seeing the kind of complaints I got for my post, I now see that child abuse is smiled upon on this site. should have known.....
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you know this is a character, and that his vids are aimed at adults, and that you are obviously a troll, and that its hilarious you are taking this so seriously, and that Doug wouldn't laugh at a child being smacked........you know that right??
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12.01.2010 - 23:57 | NCscriticI do know.....that what I found disturbing was just a joke. a joke in very bad taste.
btw everyone, I actually am fully aware that I'm trolling right now. I'm even giving my self thumbs down. this site is the only site I feel comfortable with experimenting being a troll, only cause this site has a total ifestation of assholes, assholes who are much more assholey than I would ever be. and I gotta say, sometimes, trolls do have a point, seeing you all taking me so seriously is kinda funny.
anyway, enough with the trolling. I guess the real reason I found Doug's joy in that girl being hit was because, personally, I didn't really find her that annoying. what exactly did she do that was so annoying? Doug never complained about her being annoying before that part. so, I guess in my eyes, she was just this innocent little girl. and it seemed to me that Doug found the prospect of her being hit enjoyable for no legit reason, because I didn't see her as annoying. I guess I have more of a tolerance than most people. I don't know. but yeah, that's why I put down that snooty comment. I didn't find her annoying, so I thought that smack-enjoyment was a bit disturbing. but if everyone else thinks she's so annoying, then fine. hit her. whatever. your opinion is your own, my opinion is my own, and I'm tired of this. I'm done. The Troll admits defeat. :)
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12.02.2010 - 01:40 | darkmindedsithDarn. I thought Ernest took care of you. Guess he should've used Miyk after all.
Or perhaps you're the one who covered all of New York with plants. If that's the case, you're a baaaad troll.
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12.02.2010 - 17:37 | NCscriticinteresting.....you just said that I was a bad troll. and a troll is someone who is nothing more than a douchbaggy asshole waste of filth. and you said I was a "bad" troll. so....by that logic, I guess I wasn't that good at being a troll. which in effect means that I wasn't such an asshole after all. XP
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12.03.2010 - 22:55 | DwaneI don't know what's funnier, darkmindedsith's "Troll in Central Park" reference, or the fact that NCscritic totally missed it.
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12.04.2010 - 03:46 | PLAWell, that's actually correct. The troll in "A Troll in Central Park" was considered a bad troll precisely because he was nicer and more constuctive than the other trolls.
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12.02.2010 - 03:02 | SemudaraYou seem well-intentioned, so here's some advice: do good. No one here supports child abuse. Instead of taking jokes way too seriously and engaging in a flame war, just go out and DO GOOD. If you genuinely care, you could actually make the world a better place.
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12.02.2010 - 17:39 | NCscriticummmmmmmmm......alright
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unless it's the little girl from war of the worlds, whose only job was to scream, be obnoxious, and give everyone away...
She deserves a punch in the face, AT LEAST.
Don't get me wrong, I love children...
Or rather, I prefer the ones that DON'T alert potential enemies to my presence when I'm in hiding, or piss of my captors when they are already holding a gun to my head....
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12.14.2010 - 01:29 | Kryss LaBrynOh man, did you ever read Jurassic Park?
They toned her right down for the movie, but in the book the little girl was SUCH an annoying little idiot that I seriously wanted her to get eaten.
Holy F***.
Like, her brother is trying to type a command into the computer and save all their lives and she screws it up and dooms them all because she wanted to type too. So she does. *Button mash* *button mash* *button mash* And, oh, let's scream and run when the dinos come despite being ordered to stay still, so you can give away your location and get more people killed. REPEATEDLY.
I didn't find this kid anymore annoying than any other movie kid. But Book!Ellie (or whatever her name was)?
*SMACK*
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12.02.2010 - 18:24 | Morgoth BauglirShe was annoying and badly written. It is great to watch annoying or badly-written characters get beaten up. How did you fail to see that?
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11.30.2010 - 23:19 | The Coen Brothers lost brother
Drink up that pee Costner. Bet it tastes better then the diahreah of the rest of this. What could have been an interesting sci fi movie about how people really lived in this world and instead we get violent crap.
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11.30.2010 - 23:20 | ChewbaccapastoA HUMAN TRIANGLE! NOOOOOOO! TAKE COVER!
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11.30.2010 - 23:52 | FieldMarshalPatton^3Insert Jaws 3D joke of Dennis Quad shouting to get out of water
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11.30.2010 - 23:21 | artizekApparently the Waterworld stunt show at Universal Studios made far more money that the movie and was a fraction of the cost. Kevin Costner, your movie was just beaten by a few tanks of gasoline and high school drop outs on yamahas at an amusement park attraction. Congratulations.
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11.30.2010 - 23:23 | FullmetalNinja25
OMG NOT STUFF! :O God I hated this movie as a kid.
Great review Doug! :D
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Next thing you know there's going to be a machine the you shit in a it makes donut's. Mmmmmmmmmmmmm... shit favorite donut's.
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11.30.2010 - 23:55 | jeisonrsSTUUUUUUUUUUUUFFF !!!!
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11.30.2010 - 23:27 | edjr1980
oh no not Waterworld, i thought nostalgia was supposed to make you feel good?"Waterworld" and "good" don't belong in the same sentence
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12.01.2010 - 00:13 | e33lafThis movie is just ...odd really O_o
Seriously though, what on earth was going through Kevin Costner's mind during the latter part of the 90’s? How did he go from starring in films like Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves and The Bodyguard (which I’ll admit were not necessarily amazing films, but were a least entertaining) to strange stuff like this and The Postman?
P.S. Your really seem to be loving Blackadder references lately(not that I mind).
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11.30.2010 - 23:30 | Fanboy233
Great Review, man!
I never realized when i was a kid watching this movie how stupid it is.
btw, Thank you or putting in the Bob-Bomb joke!
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11.30.2010 - 23:32 | RetroFan88
STUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUF F!!
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11.30.2010 - 23:32 | MarissaEvans
Funny, I remember this movie. :) It's been a while.
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11.30.2010 - 23:33 | MrKnockoutHow does the Nostalgia Critic keep coming back to life btw? xD
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12.01.2010 - 01:43 | forsaken7089
If you want a reviewer that keeps coming "back to life", check out Phelous, seriously. He tries to find a funny or ironic movie related way to die in almost every video.(Like having the bad guy from Anaconda neck break him with his legs. That was really funny.)
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i thot your revew was good but i think that one bland caricter was supost to be a tottol bad ass and not supost to care abot enithing
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12.02.2010 - 18:28 | Morgoth BauglirGo back to school, damnit! Your spelling and grammar suck shit!
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11.30.2010 - 23:34 | treddersDo I sense a Bum Review of Gulliver's Travels? But yeah, for what this movie cost to make, it was a letdown. Must have been all that stuff.
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02.28.2011 - 01:41 | SherandaI read Gulliver's Travels, the book, and I must say that Jack Black is all wrong for the part of Lemuel Gulliver. What was the director thinking?! Lemuel Gulliver is an intelligent, observant, philosophical gentleman! Jack Black is... not. The character and the book were comedic in very few ways. It was a book that made me think deeply about life and logic. Why did Jack agree to this?!
Sorry. As I type this message, I'm watching Single White Female with Bridget Fonda. It's affecting my mood and making me over-explain things.
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03.19.2011 - 01:29 | Sheranda"I read Gulliver's Travels, the book"? I can't read Gulliver's Travels, the movie!
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11.30.2010 - 23:35 | UFmaniacThat's exactly how I feel about Avatar.
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12.01.2010 - 03:35 | baba44713Agreed.
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12.01.2010 - 18:40 | TheCooperFINALLY!
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11.30.2010 - 23:41 | GallopingGoomba
Gah, just as horrible as I remember it. Costner's non-acting, the overall meanness of the film, and the idiocy of the premise was way too much to handle. And I'm trying to figure out where the hell all the money that went into making this... went.
Also, even if every source of ice on the planet melted, it wouldn't submerge THAT much of the land. And what the hell was that creature?
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11.30.2010 - 23:43 | lordoftheLOL
See, if the whole movie was nothing but a decent actor doing "stuff" for 80 minutes, we would have a decent movie on out hands
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12.01.2010 - 19:51 | uknownadaI believe you're looking for the Willy Wonka movies.
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