Twilight
Sunday, 30 November 2008 23:44
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11.30.2008 - 11:53 | TheDramaticMonarch
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12.01.2009 - 00:39 | ThatWhiteGuyIt wasn't actually a bad movie. However, to keep your guy badge you have to make fun of it a little bit
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01.24.2012 - 20:41 | ThePinkKirby
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12.13.2012 - 11:30 | pomaflahIt was a horrible movie. The books were terrific. Except for the kissing, which was boring. The philosophy and the moral dilemmas were interesting. I would be really interested in reading a book about Carlisle.
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It's been so long since the Bum last reviewed a (real) movie, but this was worth the wait. This may be one of the best reviews yet.
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Sorry, no offense to you, Twilight isn't a real movie, at least I didn't think so. I liked it better when it was called The Lost Boys. But yes, this review was definitely worth waiting for.
Vegetarian vampire? Like Count Duckula, right?
I'll admit all the "subtleties" in this movie weren't all that subtle... I'm glad The Bum pointed this out.
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11.30.2008 - 11:54 | Seediq_Bale
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11.30.2008 - 12:03 | avidfan141
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07.05.2009 - 20:44 | DinruYes, it is that bad.
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Well that critic was usefull.
Im not going to see that movie... it's for girls!!
anyways there is going to be sequels ;)
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05.15.2009 - 21:23 | tehodisNo. It's for people with less than one brain cells. Don't drop me into the same category as them. :/
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12.01.2009 - 00:42 | ThatWhiteGuyMy Sister watches that movie...she loves it...HOW DARE YOU SAY SHE HAS ONE BRAIN CELL!!! She isn't that smart!!! JK, that was mean. But, it did spawn some crazy people. I read this FML where this woman put glitter all over her husband so he sparkles in the sunlight like Edward, and this other one where this guy got rejected cuz the girl wanted him to be a vampire.
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11.30.2008 - 12:49 | blacktrojan3921
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11.30.2008 - 12:53 | lunchboxx
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11.30.2008 - 13:47 | NeonLightsProbably the first review I seriously couldn't hold the laughter in. Now I want a shirt with an evil looking Bum going "I am a vampire. Bite me."
Twilight but no Quantum?
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11.30.2008 - 14:00 | DanManX
I knew this movie was gonna be bad when I saw the previews, because you can already tell the vampires can walk around in daylight. Which, of course, is total BS. "Ooh, it's a new take on vampires." No, it's not. Firstly, Blade could do that since the first movie, and even THEN it was explained that he was a hybrid. These things aren't vampires. They're just Highlanders without British accents. That's it, really. Immortal, super strong/fast...no swords, either, I suppose, but otherwise that's it.
For my money, the only vampire book series adapted to a visual medium I wanna watch is True Blood. Cause that rules.
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11.30.2008 - 14:04 | christenm123It's been so long since a Bum Review! I love it!
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11.30.2008 - 14:25 | Jenx
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11.06.2011 - 17:28 | fanime1
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11.30.2008 - 14:27 | Kiyo
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11.30.2008 - 14:27 | Zenergy
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11.30.2008 - 14:31 | ThatCanadianGuy
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remember howard the duck review? its not duck tits not monkey tits=p (and yes i understand that the comment was posted before the review... i think... im not sure.. either way tho... duck tits
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yeah i hated the book and i hate the fact that everywhere you go theres something twilight....worse than a zombie invasion.
how could you watch the movie over the sound of squealing overweight unattractive schoolgirls?
so obviously i hated twilight so much already, and therefore didnt dare watch it
but thank you Mr. Bum for reviewing this movie...it needed a good kick in the teeth
...
for this I love you
but im not giving you change
look for obama tho...i heard he has plenty
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11.30.2008 - 15:09 | BabyImplosion
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11.30.2008 - 15:36 | Raymond T ThatDutchGuyWithTheTransformers
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11.30.2008 - 16:55 | Shinizaru
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this movie has been haunting me for weeks, my friend saw it with his girlfriend... and my friend... doesn't read twilight, but he reads books like it... basically books about teenage halloween people such as vampires and wizards... except harry potter (he thinks it's over rated) but i'm not kidding, you saw that episode of south park were the kids role played to be vampires? well... that really does happen in my school...
NICE REVIEW!!! now thanks to you i will NEVER EVER SEE THIS MOVIE AGAIN.... and i'm not being sarcastic... im glad you told us
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11.30.2008 - 18:24 | Oatmeal"Oh my God, this is the greatest movie I've ever seen in my life!"
Why... am I never getting tired of hearing that.
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Me and My sister are big fans of the Twilight Series and when we went to go see the movie, it wasn't all that bad. Plus the Soundtrack was kick ass. I can't believe you would say the movie is bad without even reading the damn book first! Oh, but wait, I forgot, you can't read chester, since you being a bum and all. But the review was funny anyways.
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The books and the movies are actually pretty similar. I read the Twilight series, and despised how it did indeed' pussify' vampires, and I even did a project on it.
I watched the movies for this project, and found that it was basically the same thing, although they left out the more stupid moments (thankfully). But still, the basic concept of sparkling, fairy 'vampires' is still there. As well as the emotionless heroine who is without personality.
Please don't flame me for putting this up, but I felt the need to point that out. It is no longer a valid excuse to simply say 'you didn't read the book'. If this was a review for 'Angels and Demons' or the latest Harry Potter movie, I would completely agree. Movies do often miss what books have to offer. But for the Twilight series, the movie and book were very much alike. They both kept the concept and stuck to the bland, Keanu Reeves-like personalities and plot.
And I do believe the bum can read, just that he is too drunk to really understand what the squiggly things mean.
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Yeah. I pissed at how minor the female character was in the film "Angels and Demons." In the book, she was strong, brave, intelligent, and best of all....a vegetarian! I'm a vegetarian and a feminist, so I can't help but wish there were more characters like her in movies. But no. She probably one got two lines of dialogue and didn't do shit! I was so upset! She was so badass in the books and she did nothing in the movie! Why Ron Howard?! WHYYYYYYY!
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10.02.2012 - 18:44 | Kelnak
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11.30.2008 - 18:33 | Manic Monkey


I absolutely must drop this line into a conversation.
Although I have no desire to see or read the "Twilight" series, I'd desire having a Bum Review of every potential movie sequel to the franchise. It would probably be a helluva lot more entertaining. :D