I actually requested you do this SUEDE!

Great Job! I can't believe how much fanservice was in this movie!

You Horatio'd Cloud.

My eternal love. You have it.

Thank you for trashing this movie. Every FF7-relevant thing that has come after the original game itself has only served to cheapen the storyline and get rid of everything completely awesome.

Be honest. When you said "Blistering Barnacle" was that a Tintin reference?

I am a total FF7 Fanboy, and believed when I first trailer, as I do even now, that this is a good movie. THat being sad...

This review was hysterical. Your expostion/violence songs had me on the floor, and your analysis of the charcters, while overexagerated, was pretty accurate. There were a few things you did move around to match your opinion (Rufus was revieling to Kadaj that he had Jenova, not who he was), but given that it worked, I don't really care.

Good review, and very funny.

How many swords did Cloud have? I think it might be seven or so. Still not quite sure how it makes sense that he was also able to combine them together and pull them apart again as he willed, but then again it was still pretty cool.

Hey hey hey, it was not that terrible, i mean you can put just the acction sequences and you have a nice 15 minute of great... wait a minute so it would have been what we asked for in just 30~25 mins, what a shame. but i mean lol it wasn't that terrible i have seen allot worse, THE SEQUEL FOR EXAMPLE. dawng that sucked.

Also i am not a FF7 fan because I never played it but god, i have all final fantasy games that have come out to date on the DS and GBA and in my opinion they are all great even FF mistic quest you need to be hard core for that one. aslo in siding with spoopy here, ff8 was... well to say the least disappointing. not bad, just not as expected (i has the pc version )

Aw shut up suade, i mean allot of things are better than poetry, Than includes all kinds of hentai (Except for Lolicon, that is just sick)

And is the ending like an CGI/AMV???

I loved FF7, I bought into the hype of FF7AC, and FF7 Last Order. Both of those okay, but not good endeavors made my soul die a little. thank you suede for articulating exactly what I've been feeling.

I love this movie a lot but I still got lots of laughs out of the review

"and Banzaie still insists he's French!" lol

its been a long wait but it was worth it lol;D

i couldnt have said this better myself. i've been waiting for someone to tear this thing a new rear end for a while. Great work suede

I know some people that would totally hate you for this....but those folks are bat sh-t insane about FF7.

Personally I've never played it, and therefore had no interest in the movie. and this made sure I'd never see it, I like anime but this drew the stereotypes out quite a bit. I mean Cloud is the definition of wuss and the other characters are.....there. Boring. Not seeing this.

@ Wendell: There is no such thing as guro higher than poetry.

This was a beautiful review...and I have to say that everything you liked, I liked. There's also going to be a remake of this game, so I've heard. It's supposed to be on the PS3. Wikipedia had info on it, last I heard.

ROFL-WAFLS. That was your best yet Suede, a great review everything completely true and hysterical
and i agree the music was quite good, i liked the AC version of One Winged Angel more than the original.

"Religion is Good and Cloud is Jeebus", funny stuff ;D . As for the movie itself, personally, I thought it was o.k, not great but not bad, I just like watching this style of movie. I mean I thought the animation was great, so even tho the story line left a bit to be desired, it didn't kill the movie. Good reveiw, look forward to your next one, cheers.........

Spoilers

Listen to the last 2 seconds of the video.

Chrono trigger and FF6 DID have better plots then ff7... ff7 had technoligy and emo. However After playing Crisis core I did give the game a second chance and now that I get some of the back story its not as bad, Ill still never be a 7 fan boy and I will never play FF7 DoC or watch AC and Im glade I chose not to now. Good review two thumbs way up. also I like 9 the best, when I think Fantasy I dont think cell phone I think Black mages with glowing yellow eyes in blue robes.

ive watched this movie as well but i thought it was okay but now that ive watched this i cant believe its such a big disappointment to FF fans cause im not a FF fan

lol you called yazuu a women.

lol, I actually own the sephiroth and vincent figures..

I wasn't a giant FFVII fan, I had beaten it, but I hadn't idolized over it.. So I was more in the "noob" department

but yeah, this movie was horrible.

Do more of these rants about anime, cause it was hilarious.

Not a fanboy in fact I haven't finished any of the FF Games but this movie was very good.

I agree that at many times the movie has a lot of dialogue however it has a very complex storyline.

As for action, this movie is packed and holds some of the best animation.
I also found the victory music cell phone gag pretty original and unexpected.

I would have rather seen you blasting FF Spirit within... that movie was in the theaters and was a total flop.

Just my opinion, we all know taste is none negociable.

Entertaining review though, keep em coming.

Totally agree with ya! Specially the last part about the fandom. Shame on us (I bought the Limited Edition of this diarrhea).

I only like the original game along with Final Fantasy IV and Final Fantasy V. They should never make sequels to a Final Fantasy game(with the same characters) or make Final Fantasy movies, they just ruin it, especially Final Fantasy X-2(why does it start our with a pop concert?). As for Advent Children, I liked Quinton Flynn as Reno and Crispin Freeman as Rude(although in the game rude only had a few words of dialog). I also like Steve Blum and Beau Billingslea as voice actors but I like them a lot more in better in Cowboy Bebop. there is a plethora of things I can say about this movie like Loz voice actor sucks and so does its lack of a better word, plot.

Don't forget the original Final Fantasy Movie before Advent Children. If only they put a different title instead of Final Fantasy it would've been even awesome. INSTEAD OF BEING THE 2ND LARGEST BOX OFFICE BOMB IN HISTORY!!!

One of your best reviews Suede, great work!

I personally never played Final Fantasy VII, but I still know about the characters and a few scarce moments. So when I sat down to watch this with some friends I hoped that it wouldn't be just full of references only "Fanboys" would get. But I still got confused like hell! And I didn't like the movie...

Again Suede, great work and keep going strong.

Suede, this was absolutely brilliant. I enjoyed every second.

Hilarious review, Suede. I was laughing throughout the whole thing. This is how you make a thirty-minute video. I was entertained the whole time.

I loved all the references especially the Commando reference, I thought I was the only person who quotes that movie.
I liked how you said you didn't hate it that much because I didn't either... this review is like how I reviewed Indy 4 to my friend.
I also think that the end montage was perfect!!!
I also laughed really hard during the C.S.I. reference and when you played the Fleetwood Mac song, It was full of unexpected jokes that I could have never foreseen coming which makes this review far superior to others.
I rate the review 10/10, the best review I've ever seen on this movie.

OKAY! the surprise of Rufus is that he is holding
Jenova's head, it is holy water not normal water
Benzai must hate you....lol