Wrecking Ball by Hannah Montana

(325 votes, average 4.96 out of 5)
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Image art by Krin

Comments (138)
  • Sinburner
    Oh you poor bastard
    I found this when it first came out and.... I've now become a Draugr and now wish to be at peace with the ancestors PLEASE END MY MISERY!!
  • Incrediblue
    I see Miley's nudity as showing vulnerability, and the sledgehammer represents whoever the significant other was in the relationship. But yeah, her past performances taken into account make it seem like she just doesn't like wearing clothes anymore.

    Good review c:
  • Sinburner
    I personally thinks she wanted to get fucked so hard that her womb must feel like getting crushed my a sledgehammer.... this song is pain distilled into sound
  • ladydiskette
    All I'm thinking watching this music video is how cold and painful that must be sitting on that wrecking ball bare-ass naked, I mean, god forbid anything gets caught on the chains there.
  • LikaLaruku
    Todd: "Miney Cyrus is not attractice. It looks like someone Photoshopped some boobs on Justin Beaver."

    GET OUT OF MY HEAD! I was thinking the same thing XD

    I don't believe in originality & I doubt Miley listens to Japanese rock, but that whole teddy bear choreography is SO Gackt's "U+K Live." Only Mr, Gackt could pass for a beautiful woman while Miley just looks like a little boy prancing around in his sister's underwear.
  • Jacka
    Or alternatively, Aphex Twin's Donkey Rhubarb.
  • Baby Hitler
    Especially with that god-awful haircut.
  • Asuka Soryu
    I'm with you and Todd. I saw Bieber as well. xD
  • Film Runner
    I think they may have been attempting to use nudity as a metaphor for vulnerability but the fact that it only appears sporadically and very carefully framed to avoid showing much undercuts that in my opinion. It's difficult to express vulnerability while obviously covering parts of yourself from view. Also the image of Miley Cyrus licking a sledgehammer undercuts any point they were trying to make and just comes across as really creepy fanservice.
  • JunkWatcher
    I think that whole vulnerability thing is indeed what they were going for. The problem is, after her whole failed "party-girl" image that she had not to long ago, I see it as nothing more than a desperate cry for attention. "Look everyone, I'm naked. Pay attention to meeee!!!"
    It's just pathetic and sad, really.
  • Motherfickle
    I agree, though I think she definitely could have found a better way to do it. What she's been doing has, for the most part, been pretty blatant attention seeking that has worked. The worst part is she tries to play it off as art when, 90% of the time, there is no artistic reasoning for the stunts. She has compared herself to Gaga, but Gaga is legitimately making a statement with her stunts most of the time, while Miley dressing like a "giant baby" (as she claims the VMA outfit was supposed to be) only implies that she is immature/childish. Which doesn't flatter her at all, nor does it make any sense in the context she did it in.

    The sad part is that I would have liked the song if Miley didn't piss me off with her faux-intellectualism.
  • Mike Kharkovborn who hates Brooklyn  - Nothing lasts forever or even fifty to hundred yea
    My idea is that for every evolution in Popular music and pop culture in general there's eventually going to be devolution in pop music, what I basically mean is Pop and Rock and maybe even Hip-Hop music have gotten as far as they could go in my opinion and if revealing sex scenes cannot shock people anymore in positive and negative way both than I don't know what's going on here.
  • That wrecking ball that hit the oven and did not crack it thanks to fast editing looked like it was from a Soviet-Russian cartoon series inspired by Tom and Jerry a little called Nu Pogodi or Just You Wait 1969 onwards.
  • Circuitsoft  - You say others could do better
    and they have. Search YouTube for "Wrecking Ball Sam Tsui & Kylee".

    But, if you ignore the video, Miley actually does reasonably well.
  • PlayMp1
    The title card makes it seem like Todd is a woman. Is there something we don't know?

    Anyway, this song is just dreadfully boring, like Todd said. At least with We Can't Stop, I could bitch about it and have something to talk about. With this, it's just, "uh... it sounds like a shitty version of Somebody That I Used to Know."

    Something I noticed pretty quickly too - STIUTK at least had an interesting production behind it. They eschewed electronic instruments, or even a drum kit, for a bizarre array of tuned percussion, flute, and an acoustic guitar playing a simple little riff that was distinctly not White Guy With Acoustic Guitar. This, meanwhile, has... uh... piano. And a wannabe Coldplay production (aside: I hate Coldplay, sorry).

    Really though, imagine what someone like Adele could have done with this song. It's not really much of a lyrical atrocity - Todd never really ripped into the lyrics, because they're competent, though a bit boring. The biggest issues are the production, which is just shitty Coldplay, and Miley herself, who you can't take seriously and isn't the greatest vocalist in the first place.
  • Film Runner
    Given that the title card both makes him look female and gives him tentacle hair, do you think he might be an Asari?
  • PlayMp1
    ...Did the title of this post change? I swear it used to be "Wrecking Ball by Miley Cyrus." Now it's "Wrecking Ball by Hannah Montana."
  • Albacore
    When I heard this song, I was immediately reminded of STIUTK, so much so that I completely forgot why I liked that song in the first place. Going back to listen to it, I realized that STIUTK actually had a fascinating production with interesting and unique instrumentation, despite the slightly lackluster chord progression and general lack of energy of the song.

    Basically, Wrecking Ball completely rips off STIUTK and removes all the good elements, which is why we've ended up with such a lifeless shell of a song.

    If there's any hit this year that can really compare to STIUTK, it's probably Royals. Now there's a minimalistic song that works.
  • Sinburner  - Why not review Black Metal?
    Just a thought, why not try you hand at reviewing popular metal bands and giving opinions on that? Just don't play a trip to Norway after, you'll end up like a Church.
  • PlayMp1
    While I love my metal and have a music library that primarily consists of metal (refer to my Motorhead avatar), metal is not Todd's area of expertise. He is a pop music reviewer. Him reviewing black metal would be like Doug reviewing music, or Brad reviewing comic books.

    Besides, any metal review would instantly descend into a shitstorm in the comments and on Twitter, because it's such a divisive genre. Even within a set of metal heads that agree on a few basic things, like for example nu metal and metalcore not being metal, you still find division and mutual distaste.

    Even worse: what the hell can Todd pick to review? Let's pick something off the "Hard Rock" charts, since everything modern that Todd's ever reviewed is on the Billboard charts at time of review (and everything he has ever reviewed is regardless a charting song at some point). Here's something: Hail to the King by Avenged Sevenfold. It's #2 on the Hard Rock charts.

    And we already have issues. I don't especially like A7X. Their newest single, also named Hail to the King, is not terrible (probably because it's reminiscent of Sad But True), but when it comes down to it, a lot of more dedicated metal heads don't think of A7X as "true" metal - they're metalcore-ish (newer stuff leans more towards hard rock), and are the descendants of emo, to some extent. And if Todd reviews it? Instant shitstorm in a can, just from people complaining (rightfully) that "A7X isn't metal!" and "pick something that's actual metal from x subsubsubgenre!"

    Moreover, Todd gets his material from *bad* songs most of the time - not good ones! Why would you want him trashing a genre you like? So then he picks a shitty metal song. What would it be? Metal isn't especially popular, so any shitty metal song that's *actually metal* would be rather unpopular. Shitty hard rock charts. Shitty metal does not, unless it's from an established artist who puts out a crap album (see: St. Anger, newest Megadeth album).
  • Tfatcat2
    Why not review black metal? Because it sucks balls
  • LikaLaruku
    Fufufu, Todd reviewing Death Metal would be hilarious.
  • Wario_man
    Well he reviews any pop song in the charts that's big and gets attention so if one found its way on there he probably would.
  • TragicGuineaPig
    I wonder if Miley realizes that she is making people immensely sexually uncomfortable, but she's rolling with it because it's the only way people will pay any attention to her at all. Believe me, ever since that Robin Thicke duet, I have been trying as hard as I can to forget that Miley even exists; thanks a lot for the reminder, Todd!

    The sad part is, Miley used to be a pretty girl. But that's just it: she's a pretty girl, not a sexy woman, and the harder she tries to be that sexy woman, the more she fails at being either. It's sad, and I just wish it would stop.
  • Torque
    About damn time you did this one.
  • teacaffiend
    Even if I didn't already know this was directed by Terry Richardson, I would know it was directed by Terry Richardson. His lens is always creepy and voyeuristic, this video is no different. At some point Miley is going to be caught snorting coke with Dov Charney, to the surprise of no one, because everything she does now seems to be modeled on a sticky American Apparel ad in a subway station. There's no restraint to anything either, it's either hit every note, every look, every moment at 1000db. 30 seconds of her is exhausting.
  • RectilinearPropagation
    Oh, FFS, of COURSE it was Terry "Sexual Predator" Richardson. Explains everything going on here.
  • Mousy Voice
    What personally turns me off about Cyrus is that she doesn't have much charisma naked. Cyrus looks okay in terms of her body, but all she's doing is dancing naked in front of the camera. Any idiot can do that. What a lot of people nowadays don't realize is that the seduction and the charm is often more sexy than actual sex or nudity. This song and the music video sucks because Cyrus does nothing with the nudity other than riding on a wrecking ball, compounded by the fact that the song is not sexy in and of itself.
  • fanime1
    Exactly! Thank you! I can't believe so many people think that nudity by itself is sexy, when human sexuality is much more complex than that. It's just as much, if not more, psychological than just physical.
  • SSH  - yes
    please did not start reviewing wrestling I don't watch wrestling, it's too darn predictable and boring for me where's my energy blasts, where's the explosions, where's the free hour-long screaming. Yes I watch Dragon Ball Z.
    But if you need to start reviewing something else maybe an SNL sketches. Like for example the one you just referenced in this one they shut the government down. And military is really mad at the Republican Party right now( you know the Republican Party is just egotistical pricks( sorry actual egotistical pricks but I'm running out words) when they can even pass a budget for Guns, because a black person in office,I mean really they can't pass a budget for gun, for the military! this really shows how petty they are.]
  • potterinu
    Well you always have One Hit Wonderland to fall back on when current hits bore you.Too bad in a couple months you have to go back through all these for your top ten lists for the year.
  • Albacore
    If there's really nothing interesting on the charts, you might as well do another list of the top ten worst hit songs of a past year.
    Personally, I'd much prefer see you do that than have you talk about something as lifeless and boring as this.
  • Hollywood Z
    Definitely! I miss those nostalgic ten worst of lists! Todd, you still have yet to cover a year from the 1990s and any given year would be VERY welcomed from me. Nostalgia bomb tied with painful memories....good times, good times...
  • Sean Strife
    For real. That or a One Hit Wonderland, but then again, he's been doing a lot of those lately, so maybe a Top 10 from... I don't know... 1999 or 1984 (two years he mentioned sounding epic in his 2012 review) or even 1958, the first year of the Billboard Top 100.
  • PlayMp1
    Fourthing a new Top Ten Worst list. We've had 1987 (snoozefest year), 1976 (cheesy) and 2004 (annoying). 1982 seems like a good year, along with 1992. Wonder what he could do with those years...
  • Mr.Anderssson
    I prefer the version where Nic cage's head replaces Miley's.
  • Workman
    If I want to listen to a song that uses demolition tools as a metaphor. I'll stick with Peter Gabriel's "Sledgehammer", thank you very much.
  • cosmosblue772
    Plus the music video for that holds up eons more in terms of awesome and innovative, than a majority of videos today. I think that has a lot to do with it being creative in its visuals, as opposed to being so literal its embarrassing.
  • HMorris73
    I notice you didn't make any reference to Royals by Lorde, the song which knocked Wrecking Ball off the number one spot after two weeks and has been on top for a couple months now. I'm really curious what you think of that song.
  • Rallinale
    From his Twitter:

    "Everyone asks me what I think about Royals. I guess it's good. Qualified thumbs-up. I think I like it more for what it isn't than what it is."

    https://twitter.com/ ShadowTodd/status/ 402562244682059776
  • cosmosblue772
    I think We Can't Stop is going to be a slight guilty pleasure of mine, and that in being kind of fascinating of how unaware the song, and the people who made it, of it being so sad sounding. Plus the sound of it, not really Miley's voice, but the beat and the music is kind of interesting, at least to me. Not a good song on a technical level, but still the there's something there that I can't explain. Again I doubt this was intentional and I might be making something worthless into something interesting, like a smudge on a window that has pretty shape. Who knows...
  • White_Asylum
    I love that pop song chord bit XD

    I honestly thought "Wreaking Ball" was something serious with Miley because I think she had a break up recently and she was engaged? But if it took 5 people (not counting Miley) then I was way off. I never really caught up with the lyrics either. It makes no sense to me. Mostly because of not hearing her clearly. This whole time I thought it was "I should've just let you in" Not "win"

    I like the death metal version better. The red overlay and change in music genre really gives the imagery of the video some purpose.
  • vonPeterhof
    W... was that a part of the wrecking ball scene from Nu Pogodi? Todd watches Soviet cartoons? Holy crap, that is so awesome! Okay, I do realize that the more likely explanation is that he saw that YouTube mashup of this song and the scene from the cartoon, but still, it's not every day that I see references to cartoons I grew up with in foreign media.
  • Mrs.Altair
    I liked the song, but i guess i wasn't affected by if it was bad because I heard the song...not watched the video, so i couldn't really ruin it for me. I know a lot of people have certain songs they like, and like to claim others songs they don't like as being 'terrible' or 'boring', but the best thing about being me is...well i can't hate a song. I have enough creativity to relate the songs to anything else. I don't listen to a song because it 'represents me', but my imagination. Like when people create AMVs based off of their favorite characters or so. I can enjoy 'ANY' music without disliking it, and if you have a song you think I should listen to because it is 'amazing' i will gladly listen to it.
  • TGWTGFanboy
    Me and pretty much have the same opinion. He said almost the exact same thing I did on my show only he was funnier, more intelligent, and was twice as analytical.
  • Captain Siberia
    I watched this video the same way I watched the video for "Can't Be Tamed": with the sound off. I wasn't interested to hear the bad music. I just wanted to see what kind of dumb things she'd do with her image next.

    But I don't mind hearing bad pop songs at all in the context of your reviews! Rock on!

    The pop world has been boring; hence all the One-Hit Wonderland episodes? (No complaints here! Those are awesome!)

    Incidentally, Miley's haircut is shit. And the same thing goes for Pink.

    'Cause you're pushin' too hard, pushin' too hard on me!
    ... Wait a minute. I was sure you were gonna make a Lupa reference!

    Where are they getting these hideous early CGI demos for pop videos? What is the point? They had one in the "Love You Like a Love Song" video, too! (Talk about a video fitting the song! "Love You Like a Love Song" is every bit as soulless as bad karaoke, and as annoying as whatever the hell that thing was!)

    Pop stars just love to be repellant, don't they? Actually, seems like a lot of college-age people want to be repellant, too, considering the music that resonates with them.
  • TheGreatEscapist
    During your musical intro, I THOUGHT the music sounded suspiciously like "Somebody That I Used to Know".

    The lyrics to the song did sound rather vulnerable and honest, albeit flawed, but the video REALLY undermines that with all the not-at-all-titilating sexy imagery.
    Yet another reason we should just ignore Miley altogether. (Maybe she'll go away.)

    When you stated that it sounded more like Miley was singing "Ra-a-ape me", all I could think of was the "Blurred Lines" performance at the VMAs. What was going on onstage may have been consensual, but the damn song and its disgusting lyrics… Sorry, "Blurred Lines" has become my whipping boy for awful, awful songs that get popular.
  • WesleyFoxx
    What fits under that "auteur" music listening label, exactly?

    I've started to decide that I'm sort of a hipster when it comes to music, in that most of the stuff I listen to is produced by just random people on the internet rather than labels and whatnot, though its not because I think its inherently better, it's just where I spend all my time.

    EG, my jam right now is Lonely Starlight, from FreddeGredde's album Thirteen Eight, and I just realized recently, was written in 13/8 time. Go listen to it and give the guy some love.
  • Jacka
    That was great right up until the vocals started. The it was... not so great.
  • Wario_man
    Well if you're looking for recommendations :)
    The Shins (Latest is Ports of Morrow and it is great)
    The Vaccines (two full album releases so far and they're both great but sound different)
    Bored Nothing
    San Cisco
    Of Monsters and Men
    The Honey Trees
    ^ All very chill
    Days Between Stations
    Kate Miller Heidke
    The Raincoats
  • Hollywood Z
    The opening to this song reminds me of how you opened Hoobastank's The Reason's placement....one finger on the keyboard playing one note repetitively!
  • vamast
    what does hannah montana have to do with this?
  • TooMuchFreeTime  - Put that tongue away Miley
    I've been waiting with crossed fingers for you to do this one. I'd never heard of this song til it was referenced in the NC Shining miniseries review. Then I heard it on the radio and thought "I hope Todd talks about this one".
  • Janitor25
    So glad I'm not the only one who hears the "rape me" line.

    Also: extra thank you for this review as I absolutely REFUSE to watch the video on YouTube to up her view count, along with forbidding my wife from watching it either for the same reason (despite her morbid curiosity due to all the hoopla). So now we've watched it without watching it.
  • TheAngryAnimeAddict
    I never liked this song when it came out. Everytime it comes on the radio, I cringe a bit.

    Although, it does lend itself for fantastic parody.

  • Kikuria  - Poor Todd ;.;
    wow I completely agree with you. I admit I really dislike Miley and have that bias, but your input on her image is enlightening for me. She is sort of doing that punk rock thing, or trying to at least. anyway, the song is waay unfitting to her. it really reduces the overall theme of it to rich white girl problems. I still don't like her.
    I love you Todd.
  • Critic From The Future  - Hilarious review, but...
    While I thought this was a great review (your best one in a while), I actually kind of like this song. NOT the video. The song. The video is like taking everything this song was meant to stand for and...destroying it with a wrecking ball (creative analogy, I know). I don't know why I like it...I agreed with everything you said in the video, and yet somehow, inexplicably, the song itself I find quite good. Maybe you just have to clear your mind of everything you know about Miley "TwerkIt" Cyrus to start enjoying it.
  • zantesuken  - Agreed
    "Quite good" is maybe a bit generous, but I do like the song. Have you heard this? http://www.youtube.com/ watch?v=4gDlA_8k7n4
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