Howling 7: New Moon Rising

(80 votes, average 4.95 out of 5)
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Comments (69)
  • SpeedyEric
    avatar
    Your intro scared me in two ways:
    1. You said “Howdy,” and
    2. You did something to your hair, right?

    2:22- At least none of them said “cheese and crackers” like that jack@$$ soldier from “The Happening.”

    I haven’t seen a movie so cheap since Birdemic.

    The comic relief country music montage is NO Bulk and Skull moment.

    10:20- I think it’s coming from a certain t-shirt you’re wearing.

    I think this film should have been titled “Howling VII: New BS Rising.”

    16:54- I guess there’s no need to say “Are you okay?” to her anymore.

    17:35- My reaction exactly.

    21:36- They don’t? …Oh right, they DON‘T. This film is pulling a “Howling 2” on our @$$es since the werewolves in that film have the same weaknesses as vampires (who also have the power of mind control). No wonder this is the lowest rated Howling movie on IMDB.

    24:37- =O …God help us all.
  • BooRat  - SE
    avatar
    Hey, I'm from the south and that's how we say hello!
    Now when you should be scared is when the Howdy is fallowed by a compliment on how "purdy" your mouth is!

    17:35-Missed oppertunity for a Picard facepalm!

    21:36-I'm actually digging this idea of a Werewolf with all these powers and odd weaknesses. like a wakey comedy!

    24:37-Dear God, they mixed the Howling with Twilight! WTF!?
  • SpeedyEric
    avatar
    I wasn't speaking how people greet each other in your neck of the woods. I was just shock seeing Lupa in a southern girl wig and starting the episode with a loud and clear howdy. Hell, I also say "howdy" every once in a while, and I think I got it from my mom, because she grew up on a farm.
  • BooRat
    avatar
    This is when we start playing dueling bangos, right!? Now, the hair was wierd that she was wearing but I think a coonskin cap would've been better!
  • chronosXD
    howling reborn please.
  • Phelous
    avatar
    STAND UP!!! TESTIFY!!!
  • Obscurus Lupa
    avatar
    YOU'RE GOIN' DOWN, PAPPY! WITH EXTREME PREJUDICE!
  • Phelous
    avatar
    You can all testify, IN HELL!!! *firing uzi*
  • Mucca
    avatar
    An uzi? Do you not have a shotgun?
  • ArtticWitchica
    avatar
    Dammit I want a copy of Sad Panda's cover of Thriller so badly now D:
  • Veran
    avatar
    Don't we all?
  • Mucca
    avatar
    AAH!
    You know, I react like that every time you change your hair. It's not a knock against it, it's just unexpected.
  • Hitsuji-San
    avatar
    Lupa, don't disbelieve the power of Tour Guides! We hear all, we know all (and we tell people about it for reasonable prices at prearranged times of the week!)

    GO Tour Guides!
  • Gummo_Marx
    avatar
    Oooh, she looks good with dark hair.
  • The_Awesometeer
    avatar
    Yes she does. But she looks good all the time.


    I love Lupa
  • Nequissimus
    avatar
    I've gotta see that movie

    And i want a copy of the pandas thriller

    Oh... Ode to joy is Beethoven, not Bach ;)
  • JaiCSC
    avatar
    Is it bad that it took 15 minutes for me to notice that Lupa was wearing a wig/or changed her hair?

    Well that was a great way to end Howling month. A film that is so impressively bad that... Oh, there's another one.

    Never mind I suppose... Wait? Is that Lindsey Shaw? AKA Moze from Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide? It is.

    Oh come on woman! You were in NDSSG! A show that I'll argue as one of the greatest children's shows ever conceived. Why is that almost everyone from a show THAT GOOD moved onto something crap?

    Lupa, I look forward to you utterly destroying that movie next week and hopefully condemn the stupidity of it actors for ever thinking something like this would elevate their careers.
  • BooRat
    avatar
    AWWWW, that last bit was saddening! You mean to tell me Pappy died before this movie was even finnished!?

    This does look like the kind of shlock film I'd watch and like.

    A Werewof with all those powers does sound like a cewl ass idea for a film maybe one of those cheesy Asylum SyFy channel movies with tons of crappy CGI! We'll call it Super Wolf!

    Wow they made a newer Howling movie!? I knew of the newer Children of the corn and Hellraiser, but how did that exscape my gaze!?
  • Supermutant2099
    avatar
    This was just a bad one but at least actually had a tf unlike 5. Pappy was cool though. Life in that town must be really slow since biggest news was before werewolf that there was dirt in pappy's chilly. I got to say that stand up song was pretty catchy. Lime dancing WTFIWWY people?
    And then there is Howling Reborn. ::Groans:: I consider myself a werewolf. I hate twilight. I proudly own American Werewolf In London and Original Howling as part of Scary Movie/Halloween Collection. I can proudly say that me and any other werewolf or transformation fans would like to disown this movie and I haven't even seen it yet. From what I hear and trailer yes it is a twilight rip off. How do you go from Dirt In Your Chilly to Emo Werewolves.
    Twilight random and rip offs have brought horror to a new low bad and stupid that hasn't been seen since the days of chainsaw Excalibur in third Texas chainsaw massacre. It was third one right?
  • TamLin
    Is it just me, or do the people who design masks and makeup for werewolf movies not know what a wolf looks like? That thing here looks like a rabbit for the four seconds it's on screen.
  • jalford
    avatar
    BRUNETTE WIGS DON'T WORK THAT WAY!!!
  • dennett316
    avatar
    They do when you have the power of Kate Hodge.
  • Kaiju-Z
    avatar
    Howling Reborn's actually pretty good~ :3
  • spookydonkey42  - Pappy 4 President
    avatar
    spectacular review!

    Also SadPanda is flippin AWSUMB!!
  • Mara999
    avatar
    "Stand up!" Pappy is easily the most watchable thing in the movie :D
    Sad Panda's Country!Thriller kicks ass as well :)
  • Shinigami
    avatar
    That was so bad that its good kind of bad.
  • Flaregun
    avatar
    So, you say that the writer/director's main motivation was to tie all the Howling films together into one continuity? But you only show tortured, logic-defying attempts to tie together films IV through VII. What about The other three? Seems odd they wouldn't try to tie in the original Howling, particularly since it's the only one of the lot that was actually a decent film. Not to mention, the first film is already in direct continuity with the cheesetastic Howling II, which boasts the combined awesomeness of Reb Brown, Christopher Lee, the always topless Sybil Danning, werewolves that the script seems to think are vampires and an 80's New Wave band performing a kick-ass theme song that could give even Pappy's "Stand up, Testify!" a run for its money. I mean come on, how could you not want your film to take place in the same Universe that has Reb Brown in it?
  • Dust
    Hmm - I feel the pointless need to tie-in the first three.

    Ted's accent is obvious, so there's Howling 3.
    1 & 2.. Stirba visited the castle once?

    (Edit: We had the same idea)
  • Senor Incognito
    avatar
    Well that was fun, though I confess,
    The film looks quite a trial to me,
    At being worst, it was the best,
    And you enjoyed it,( I could see),
    The morbid line-dance, silly shirts,
    The 'dirt-con-carne', cowboy boots,
    It hurts, it hurts, it's damn perverse!

    Your hair looks nice, I think it suits.
  • JcDent
    avatar
    7? What, do these movies breed by spreading spores or something?

    Also, Lupas hair kind of reminds me of a coon hat here.
  • Zoltan Motherwell  - Praise to the Lupa!
    avatar
    Love Howling Month! Really enjoying these reviews, funny stuff!
  • Vanguard
    avatar
    Pappy is standing up and testifying with the Lord now. *sniff* I miss him already...

    Sad Panda's cover of Thriller was *brilliant*, by the way. Are there any chances of him releasing the entire song at some point?
  • Axel Osbourne
    avatar
    I always knew line dancing was the work of the Devil.
  • Doresh
    avatar
    Man, this movie looks like fun XD !

    And did they honestly make a werewolf-version of Twilight, set in a world were floodlights seem to be EVERYWHERE Oo ?
  • Serpent@Eden
    avatar
    Nice review as always. Only, the Ode to Joy is the final movement of Beethovens ninth symphony - so-called, because it is the ninth. And by Beethoven... ;)
  • Oancitizen
    avatar
    Why does this movie smell like grits?
  • BooRat
    avatar
    Mmmmmm grits!
  • alexthed
    avatar
    Good review and congratulations on winning the Olympics!
  • TheDogSannin
    avatar
    That is the saddest line dance I've ever seen. Were they being forced to dance at gunpoint? Or maybe some kind of strange 'line dancing' disease?
  • FrankN.Stein
    avatar
    The Reboot... There's always a Reboot......
  • SpeedyEric
    avatar
    If I want a reboot, I'll stick with Christpher Nolan's Batman, thank you very much.
  • theswedishfilmnerd
    avatar
    I almost started to cry during Pappy's big musical number, that was beautiful!
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