Baby Geniuses 2, Part 2
Written by MikeJ Thursday, 17 February 2011 00:10
Awesome titlecard by http://drriconius.deviantart.com/
Comments (52)
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02.17.2011 - 00:54 | Memoria
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02.17.2011 - 10:25 | Virgil_theBadassPoet
The only part of this movie I somewhat liked was the backstory for the kid. They didn't even need the other four kids, they could have just made this about him, not that it would've made it much better. It feels like this was a concept for a completely different movie, but when they brought it into the studio this happened:
Studio: "This looks decent but we hired you to write a sequel for Baby Geniuses."
Writer: "Well, yeah, but I thought we could make it more...adult friendly. That way it would probably earn more money in the box office."
Studio: "But there aren't any babies in it."
Writer: "Yes there are, the ones in the orphanages and..."
Studio: "No, we hired you to write a sequel with babies and lots of pretty colors. That's what kids want to see. Not an immortal kid sticking it to an authority figure. Kids want to see things bouncing up and down on the screen."
Writer: "But if you'd just..."
Studio: We WILL NOT fund this movie unless you add in more cotton candy nonsense. Even if you don't address a single thing that was in the original. Are we clear?"
Writer: "...Fine, I'll make some changes."
Studio: "Excellent, oh and send in John Hughes with the Home Alone 2 sequel when you leave."
The end result has the four kids seem phoned in, badly. John Voit's hammy acting almost makes this movie so bad that it's good. Alas, not even he could save it.
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07.19.2011 - 18:41 | gnsquared
Whats interesting enough is that that writer happened to teach me freshman English. Gregory Poppen at Calabasas High School. LMAO.
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02.17.2011 - 15:36 | axlryder
The worst part is that this was that last movie bob clark directed before his death, although I get the feeling the man just didn't give a shit at this point.
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02.17.2011 - 01:19 | SpaceGirlSpiff
It's sad when a sequel to "Baby Geniuses" qualifies as shameful, isn't it? I mean, you'd think that there'd be nothing in the original to shame... but BOY does this one seem to reek!
You poor British person, having to watch it all the way through! I think I'd go a bit funny as well....
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02.17.2011 - 01:13 | Bonkers
whoever was the producer that thought "hey, lets give the script a shot" is hopefully now jobless. dear lord, what a waste of everything
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...for telling your children you hate them.
This isn't a bad film, no, but impressive. It's impressive to see how low Hollywood can squat down and squeeze out such a movie onto the lap of the viewing public.
I'm honestly at a loss for words. Jon Voight, this makes your role in Bratz nearly dignified.
What else more can you say? This film doesn't even deserve a 1.4/10 rating on IMDB.
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02.17.2011 - 02:11 | Deimos1984rd
Congrats on watching this movie without losing your sanity....kind of.
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02.17.2011 - 02:37 | The_Awesometeer
Is this your last review?
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02.17.2011 - 02:42 | Daemon25
My gods, the CGI in the last half of that film was terrible, and don't get me started on the lip sync - did they actually hire any actual animators for that, or did they just get a team of monkeys to do it for them?
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02.17.2011 - 02:42 | fasterwhatever
loved the slow zoom in 'LOL?'... maybe could become a recurring gag?
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02.17.2011 - 02:51 | Rockabore
That film is really something I think people should watch just to see how much an incoherent mess it was, I mean you honestly feel like you're watching a really weird dream the way things make no sense and keep getting more and more stupid. I mean aside from the fact that it's about babies and crazy German Jon Voight (whoever dreams about that combo is... well obviously, the person that came up with this, but also fucking insane).
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02.17.2011 - 03:25 | DylanS
Mike, the video glitches up at 2:03.
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02.17.2011 - 03:26 | DylanSYou think that's bad? They originally planned a THIRD MOVIE after this one, but it got canned when Bob Clark got killed by a drunk driver in 2007.
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02.17.2011 - 03:51 | TBTabby...Yeah, after that, Karate Dog is looking very promising by comparison. I'm sure the dog is a better actor than anyone in this movie.
This movie actually has a 0% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. THAT'S TOO HIGH.
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02.17.2011 - 03:51 | Grimm
Please dont watch karate dog, we need you to not hang yourself in the closet.
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02.17.2011 - 04:24 | FunkyM
Wow, I salute you sir, watching that Terrible, TERRIBLE movie, so that we don't have to.
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02.17.2011 - 05:14 | timotakaFor a good Jon Voight movie, how about Midnight Cowboy? Deliverance? Heat?
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02.17.2011 - 05:26 | Justvendetta
AH..the stupidity of this movie... it hurts!
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02.17.2011 - 05:27 | Shinigami
Oh the pain, the pain!
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02.17.2011 - 07:20 | TheManFromBartertown
I saw the first one in the cinemas as a kid, because I didn't know any better.
BUT WHY GOD, WHY DID THEY HAVE TO MAKE A SEQUEL TO THE MOST REPULSIVELY UNCREATIVE MOVIE EVER MADE?
And as for Jon Voight, I saw him in Midnight Cowboy and felt sad for him. Seeing him accept this role made me sad for him for OTHER REASONS.
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02.17.2011 - 07:29 | Whatpayne
I tried to resist the facepalming but by the R2D2/"save me Obi-Van Kenobi" part I fell.
Seriously, am I the only one here who feels embarrassed just watching these clips from this awful movie?
MikeJ you did your best, and I salute that. No one should be subjected to the horrors you face... (FYI, loved the "dark" jokes. Keep it up.)
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02.17.2011 - 09:40 | Behellmorph
Well the silver lining here is that you were able to make me bare even a second of this movie with your review.
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02.17.2011 - 09:46 | Redblaze
Please don't be your final review.
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02.17.2011 - 10:29 | SennaViolette
Um.....That was terrible, just terrible.
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02.17.2011 - 11:02 | SKaiser
Tell me... if the video glitches at 2 minutes WHY is there 21 comments already?! Just goes to show how many people actually watch the video fully XP
edit: oh weird you have to drag the playhead to fix it
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02.17.2011 - 11:46 | Lotus Prince
Actually, the video continues to run; it's the picture that glitches at that time. It'll pop back normally.
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02.17.2011 - 10:47 | JubelaOh MikeJ, you make my days a better place to be :D
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02.17.2011 - 11:53 | Lotus PrinceIs it me, or does John Voight's character sound like Nimdok from I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream?
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02.17.2011 - 12:18 | HiAndromon
3:25-
That actually does happen to me, then again I do have Asperger syndrome and remember some things pretty far back.
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I'm glad I'm not the only one who's getting the skip in the middle of the video. I've been waiting since I found out that that baby is still a baby 70 years later, I've been waiting for the reveal of why the crap that's so. I had to wait an extra week because it's a 2-part review, and now there's a glitch where it skips over the entire origin story.
"But he's willing to tell anyone who- (freeze) -goo in his mouth."
I hope this will get fixed.
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02.17.2011 - 13:12 | Kazs1492
This is undoubtedly the worst sequel of all time.
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He would've eaten the entire cast of this thing passing off as a movie.
But I wonder who would win in a fight, Cop Dog or Karate Dog?
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02.17.2011 - 14:08 | Doresh
No wonder CGI movies are so popular: the 21st century did TERRIBLE things to live-action kids films...
And yeah, this movie is soo bad that the video glitched Oo
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Good movie there MikeJ!