Baby Geniuses 2, Part 1

(168 votes, average 4.87 out of 5)
Comments (95)
  • samwyse
    Great work again MikeJ.

    I had to imdb the blond girl, she's hot.
  • Grimm
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    meh not bad looking, but nothing amazing.

    and Mike your not allowed to leave us, its forbidden. FORBIDDEN!!
  • sprezzatura
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    lol I imdb'd her too! Not because I had the hots for her though, I (wrongly) thought she looked a touch like Dany from Game of Thrones and I was curious...
  • Torchic91
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    Jeez, if Jon Voight is a military commander, then he should have just shot his kid arch nemesis when he had the chance. But what am I saying, that would be bringing logic into this movie.
  • Taufiq91
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    My god Jon Voight,

    STop making shitty films. I know you're old, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't care!
  • Jael
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    MikeJ, I just want to thank you for undertaking a movie so shitty (and over the the cutoff date)that even the Nostalgia Critic will not do it.

    And good God Jon Voight, you need to stop showing up in these godawful movies, even if the producers showed up with a dump truck full of money at your house.
  • Deimos1984rd
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    I really do not want to know what Karate Dog is like :p
  • Seiryu64
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    Absolutely as terrible as you think, and more. That's all you need to know...
  • Lotus Prince
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    I remember seeing commercials for this movie. It's pretty amazing how much I raged.
  • mariomarc
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    for me the most interesting thing about this film is that it has lowest rating of every film on IMDB
  • SkullCap  - Dear Jon Voight,
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    I just wanted to tell you I'm sorry that you made that deal with Satan years ago. All that success and acting talent, we the public assumed it was all you. But now our eyes are opened and we see the truth.

    You were probably young and foolish when you made the deal; thinking, "I'm a good actor, but I don't know if I'll have a career once I'm in my golden years. I'd sell my soul to remain in movies." Then Satan appeared offering a contract, not wanting your soul, but instead w/ fine print saying you'd have to spend a majority of your golden years in children's films. You thought, "Sure, many great actors have been in good movies in their golden years. Why not?"

    Don't worry Jon, I see those brimstone shackles that are clamped on your ankles. Nothing I can do. Our only hope is Divine Providence will cut a deal with Satan to destroy your shackles so you can spend the rest of your life acting in good movies.

    Hang in there and fight the urge to act in this kind of bollocks.
  • buzzUact
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    Mike J, you can't leave us :S
  • coolguystatus  - Wow Just Wow
    I am probably in a small minority (5 people max) that liked the first movie. sure it wasn't the best move but it was an interesting concept and a somewhat decent plot. Its a guilty pleasure, but this.... THIS i don't even know what to call it. Garbage would be an insult to garbage. Even the trailer couldn't make this movie even sound halfway decent.ugg
  • Undertaker91
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    well then im one of those 5 as well. as for this one, its scum, pure scum.
  • Moomoof
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    Why was this made..this doesnt even continue the last movie ...at all

    why was thsi made and fuck the guy from dragon ball evolution guy!
    how did they get all these actors to go this shit?
    ugh pain
  • redjirachi
    This...is an abomination.It is something Uwe Boll would see as horrible,and he's basically the Antichrist of movie directors.It is the unholy spawn of the Garbage Pail Kids Movie,determined to carry on its awful legacy for all time.Hell is too good for this movie

    I bet its movies like these that created Uwe Boll in the first place.Linkara's Countdown To Final Crisis.The Nostalgia Critic's Garbage Pail Kids.Film Brain's Epic Movie.Spoony's Pumpkinghead's Revenge.The AVGN's Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde.Y Ruler of Time's Prince of Tennis.And now we have this as your foe
  • Poddington  - Fresh
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    Wow this film is disgusting. I physically feel creeped out when I see CGI kids and the lip syncing, they look abnormal. Like the commercial with the roller skating babies. Absolutely disgusting.

    I hate you Mike for making this video, but respect you for actually watching the whole film.
  • DylanS
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    Hang in there, Mike! We're all praying for you.
  • Daemon25
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    The title alone made me shake my head in dis-belief, but the movie footage... How can suh crap be made? Who thought this would be succesfull? Why does this exist? Why? Why? WHY??????
  • stickshaka  - *sigh of contentment
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    Good to see ya back in 2011.
  • FunkyM
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    ...

    .....

    .......

    WHAT?!?!!!?????!!!??!!?!! ?!?!?!?!!???

    No seriously, What? How? WHY???

    Why does this movie exist? How can I think that the girl baby is adorable? What is wrong with people that they actually WANT to see these movies?

    Ugh, I need to watch some GOOD movies.
  • Shinigami
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    Don't worry MikeJ. This might be bad movie but there is still plenty of shameful sequals for you to review.
  • TGWTGCirckleJerk2011  - everyone here is going to kiss your butt but im no
    very boring commentary
  • dennett316
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    Damn you're bad ass...can I be your friend?
  • Yeahno
    Troll harder, kid. Someone might care.
  • BillyBobBaggyBottom
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    .... I would watch a movie with a black baby voiced by Samuel L Jackson shouting mother fucker, that at least would make any bad movie awesome.
  • Sylveria
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    ^ What he said.
  • Bonkers
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    At least there is a bit of justice. The director died in a car crash 2007.
  • dennett316
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    That's an awful thing to say, over the line there buddy. Sucky movies do not justify joking about a guy dying...I don't care how shit they are.
  • PalaceOfWisdom  - Hell
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    Your going to Hell for this one.
    guess i'll see you there, because i laughed hard at your comment ;)

    To be fair, Bob Clark also did "Black Cristmas"
    We'd all take the money to direct this turd
  • Devilfish
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    Peter Wingfield? Oh man. Oh man...
  • SolidGoldCEO
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    Am I the only one who thinks those kids were too old to be in nappies?
  • Crunchy_Frog
    You're not the only one.

    Someone probably thought having all these kids in diapers constantly, with naked legs, would look "cute". (I'll give you a hint, movie director: It's not.)

    I wonder if, if this movie was made today in its climate of paranoia about child abuse, this movie would be considered child porn. They're clearly not toddlers anymore, and the camera keeps focusing on their crotches....
  • Bonkers
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    This movie was made in 2004. I think even only seven years back this thing would have been almost considered child porn. And regarding the number of internet weirdos in general...
  • Doresh
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    Don't give up, MikeJ. You can do this!

    Oh, and this flashback didn't take place in the 80s, but in the 60s. This makes this commando baby OVER 40 YEARS OLD, and Kane (why a former German/Russian/Whatever general has such a name is beyond me) must be over 90...

    And who the hell makes movies like that? Who thought bad cuts and Silicon Valley babies were a good idea?! ARGH!
  • AdventChild
    Hard to believe that the director of A Christmas Story and Black Christmas to make such baby diarrhea and drivel. It's like Rugrats meets JLA and induced with mental retardation and stupidity.
  • reganroxs13
    that was really funny i never really noticed to CGI lips before.

    p.s. the band was called O-Town.
  • Dead Planet
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    Thnx for bringing those awful memories back.

    Jeeeeez. O-town. /shivers.
  • TheGunboat
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    I saw this movie once.

    I was staying at my father's office, waiting for him to finish a meeting. We got a few movies from Blockbuster in preperation. One of those movies was this.

    Just hearing the title of this movie rends my soul apart. All I can remember about that day is unending pain and suffering.
  • omendaos
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    Those kids are babies!? /facepalm
  • jayo
    They aren't even babies, they're 2 and 3 year olds whose parents need to give them pants and they need to start acting their age! Jesus Horatio Stonewall Christ, man!

    And please don't end with this movie Mike! You're great, and we want you to do more!
  • Crunchy_Frog
    It's as bad as "Baby's Day Out"... which I only know from the RedLetterMedia review, but those outtakes were painful enough to watch. Annoyingly random things happen, the plot makes no sense, every character acts like an utter idiot.

    And whoever made this waste of time apparently (mistakenly) thought "cute kids" could carry the whole movie.

    But what really amuses me is that not only did the script writers steal the idea of a "magic potion that turns you into a super-fighter" from Asterix comics, but didn't realize that this could be interpreted as promoting drug use in a kids' movie. Think about it: Small kids watch this movie and the lesson they learn is, "If you drink from a glowing green bottle it will give you superpowers! Yay!" Enjoy your steroids, kids. Come on, media censors have gone nuts over lesser things.

    Reminds me of how TSR back in the 1980s rewrote the concepts behind the "Savage Coast: Red Steel" campaign setting for Dungeons & Dragons roleplaying game just because they were afraid that "concerned parents" would construe the idea of protagonist player characters using the metal cinnabryl to gain superpowers as promoting drug use without bad consequences. Therefore they changed it so that now cinnabryl counteracted the evil Red Curse, like a medication for a chronic illness.
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