Mega Shark vs. Giant Octopus
Written by Film Brain Thursday, 03 June 2010 18:46
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Comments (221)
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06.03.2010 - 19:18 | Ghstzch
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[quote=Ghstzch]This movie sucked so fucking bad! I work at blockbuster and surprisingly people either rent this one or Sharks in Venice. weird shit! But I've been waiting for a new review man, so thank you! :D
Maybe do Paranormal Entity next? hehe[/quote]
Sharks in Venice has the best tagline ever. "Italians make the best food." :)
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Have you heard of Sharktopus? It's a SyFy Original Movie. I remember reading the summary of it and thinking "How could this not be awesome?" Well, I think I watched the first fifteen minutes of it until I saw the creature's tentacles come out of the water on the beach and grab a woman. I could not believe how terrible the graphics were. The movie was made in 2010! You would think that SyFy, a network that has been showing science fiction movies for nearly twenty years, would know how to make one!
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06.04.2010 - 04:44 | blackmarketliverto be fair .No one expects that kind of movie to be any good. So this review is kinda pointless.
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Kind of pointless?
Pointless like shooting fish in a barrel, pointless like eating when you're hungry, pointless like a sharpened pencil made of swords!
This review HAD to be done, man.
The movie deserves it.
...
GOD, just thinking about this movie makes my eyes bleed and my ears replay the line "My family were all fishmen..."
And why did Lamarr randomly say Lamarr in the middle of the Shark/Octopus fight?
*Boom!*
*Crash!*
"Lamarr!"
*Kablooey!*
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06.04.2010 - 08:55 | moonloon
This series is called "Bad Movie Beatdown." We know [i]all[/i] these movies are bad. Just because we know that, doesn't mean we can't enjoy mocking them.
Anyways, my favorite part of this has to be the super-jumping shark attacking the plane.
I just love that bad actor's "HOLY SHIT! -dramatic zoom-"
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06.04.2010 - 12:18 | SquishyMan
......chris? D: is that YOU? if so, this is jonah from LJ!!
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10.19.2010 - 16:54 | makutateridax20hey atleast it is better than transmorphers =D =D =D XD
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06.03.2010 - 19:08 | DoomPL
:woohoo: sweet, been waiting for someone to review it
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06.03.2010 - 19:18 | Starsky23I can't help it, your just to hasty for me. Try to speak slowly and more clearly.
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05.08.2011 - 20:07 | SherandaWhy don't you try spelling your words more carefully, or try to learn how to understand British accents? I suggest watching BBC with closed captioning.
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06.03.2010 - 19:22 | TragicGuineaPig
Three quid for that piece of squid? (sorry, couldn't resist).
Okay, at that scene with the flying shark, there really needs to be John Williams' Superman theme playing.
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06.03.2010 - 19:23 | The Main EventerGreat review. You had me laughing from beginning to the end.
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06.03.2010 - 19:25 | BloodySharpieI had to pause when I saw your reaction to the shark jumping to attack the plane. I don't know why, I just found it hilarious. :D Commercial airplanes mostly fly at a height of 36,000 feet, how in the hell can a shark jump THAT high in the air?!?!?!?
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06.05.2010 - 19:16 | 715it's part flea
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06.03.2010 - 19:27 | Thunder_Christo
:( Wouldnt Mega be bigger than a Giant. Also what a mismatch in general a shark would dominate a octopus
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06.04.2010 - 00:42 | DataTroll
Actually, pound for pound octopi are far and away more deadly than sharks.
The difference is that in the real world sharks get a lot bigger. But two leviathans of that size? I wouldn't place any bets on it.
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05.08.2011 - 20:42 | SherandaThe octopus would try to hide itself, but the shark would find it anyway using its keen senses. The shark would bite one of its tentacles, and the octopus would detach the tentacle and get away. But, if they had no choice but to fight, the octopus would catch the shark with its powerful tentacles/arms. The octopus is also very intelligent, so it would then either strangle the shark or throw it onto dry land, where the shark will be crushed by its own weight, since it doesn't have a ribcage. So, as long as the shark doesn't get to the octopus's head, the winner would be the octopus.
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05.20.2011 - 06:26 | baticus_moronicus
Are octopuses really that intelligent? I heard that their brain isn't sophisticated enough to operate their tentacles independantly, so they couldn't tie a knot, for example. But I've also heard they can do obstacle courses and stuff, so maybe they are more intelligent than sharks. Also apparently an octopus in a sealife centre figured out how to remove the plug in the bottom of its tank. Needless to say...it removed itself from the gene pool. XD A great example of being TOO clever.
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I like your work. But I cant place the accent. As a native of the UK I am intrigued. What part england, exactly, are you from.
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06.03.2010 - 19:30 | NEUTRO!
Hilarious review!
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06.03.2010 - 19:34 | EcchiOtaku
Taking a look at footage from this movie, I noticed this movie bears a resemblance to a recently released SyFy Original movie called "Mega Piranha". I'm pretty sure that the "base" that they used in this movie is the same one from that movie and the actress who plays this movie's heroine also plays the heroine of that movie too. How about revieing some SyFy Original movies instead of Asylum's, Film Brain :evil: ?
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06.03.2010 - 20:03 | Slick-Rob
I saw that movie too, and no the heroines are not the same. Mega Piranha officially made the "Stupidest Movie Of All Time" Mark in my book. I lost it when the mega piranha jumped into the ocean. I mean the whole movie was bullshit, but REALLY?!
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06.04.2010 - 01:58 | Psycho_meMega Piranha is an Asylum film
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06.03.2010 - 19:37 | dylan connell
do sunday school musical now
couldnt resist to give you another assylum movie
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06.05.2010 - 11:55 | TomQuoVadis
YEAH! He could do [i]their[/i] Jaws ripoff.
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04.18.2011 - 20:15 | SherandaLike Sharktopus!
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06.03.2010 - 19:44 | youstic10:55
"Thank you, Captain Dumbass."
Don't you mean Captain Lame Ass?
Ha, Ha, Ha
You see, because his name is......
Oh, never mind.
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06.03.2010 - 19:45 | MarkhorSweet, I finally get to see a new review of yours instead of watching old ones.
Bad movie, great review.
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06.03.2010 - 19:48 | Fluffyman
Asylum are absolutely shameless in their cheapness, they don't even try to make their films look professional.
My theory behind the repeating establishing shot is that it was meant for the SyFy Channel airings as something to go back to after a commercial break. Film_Brain said on his Twitter page that it's possible but the DVD didn't have any fade-outs to sort of signify a commercial break so it comes off as completely pointless way of reminding you of where you are.
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04.18.2011 - 20:22 | SherandaI agree with you, Fluffyman. Reading the titles of Asylum's movies makes me think of pornographic films, you know, the ones that are parodies of successful movies.
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06.03.2010 - 19:50 | Electrick monk
WoW,you'd think a movie that was called Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus would be awesome by default,,but here we are! :unsure: lol
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06.03.2010 - 20:15 | Tomsta666Didn't even know this film existed. Really, they'll try to make money from any piece of shit!
"Don't ask me to do another asylum movie, please?"
You love it really!! :D
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[quote=EcchiOtaku]Taking a look at footage from this movie, I noticed this movie bears a resemblance to a recently released SyFy Original movie called "Mega Piranha". I'm pretty sure that the "base" that they used in this movie is the same one from that movie and the actress who plays this movie's heroine also plays the heroine of that movie too. How about revieing some SyFy Original movies instead of Asylum's, Film Brain :evil: ?[/quote]
I second that, Mega Piranha was a horrible, disgusting movie. Film Brain you MUST review Mega Pirahana. In fact, I request you do ALL or at least a few of the SyFy movies. They all are horrible. I mean it, I felt so stupid while watching this let alone after the ending. The ending...I was on the verge of a drinking binge when this thing ended.
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06.03.2010 - 20:20 | gaaralee1234
For some reason I cannot say "giant shark vs. mega octopus" with a straight face
Why didn't film brain make a hentai joke during the fight scene it was beyond perfect
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06.03.2010 - 19:59 | SirBraneDamujIs this a new opening? :o
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06.03.2010 - 20:03 | pandorina
Watch out Jaws its the Cracken!!!!
Gosh, I love your videos.
Can't wait to see the next one.
PS would love to see you review Dragon Wars. aka: D-War; aka: War of the Dragons.
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06.03.2010 - 20:08 | brooks101189
heh, I think I was one of the few that actually suggested it during your Transmorphers review.
Now try covering Mega Piranha with it's suicidal bombing giant piranha
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06.03.2010 - 20:05 | SolidGoldCEO
Im surprised you reviewed this without mentioning the word boring.
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06.03.2010 - 20:07 | ganondorf49I found this movie to have too little action and too much BORING well actually too much dialog actually
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[quote=Morgoth Bauglir]How about some Sci-Fi Channel/SYFY movies, then?[/quote]
Definitely. I'd love to see Matthew take on Frankenfish, Sands of Oblivion, or Chupacabra: Dark Seas.
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06.03.2010 - 20:11 | matt.recneps
Great review, very funny. Nice to see the movie didn't make you completely lose your sanity. :D
"We're getting married in two days."
ARGH! Why would someone say that in a monster/disaster movie?! The rest of the passengers should have taken turns kicking him in the testicles after saying that! Or maybe they were too busy thinking about how they're retiring next week, writing a letter to their pregnant wives back home, and saying "I have a bad feeling about this."
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06.04.2010 - 17:42 | BloodySharpie"I'm getting married in two days" is the new "two days left before retirement". ;)
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06.03.2010 - 20:12 | OmegatripodMy god, the part with the megalodon leaping 30,000 feet and eating the plane had me laughing so hard, I had to pause the video. Great work, FB, more reviews like this! This was great.
Also, I, um, fourth that. You have to review some SyFy original movies. They're horribafuckus. EXCEPT for Dungeons & Dragons: Wrath of the Dragon God.
When I was a wee lad, I saw Dungeons & Dragons. Being an avid young gamer, it ran over my soul with an 18-wheeler. A year or two later, I found out about the sequel, Wrath of the Dragon God. It was a group of D&D fans' low-budget attempt to wipe the shit stain of the D&D movie from history. And it worked so well. I rejoiced, and D&D: WOTDG has held a special place in my heart ever since. Now THAT'S a Dungeons & Dragons movie!
So yeah, do the [i]other[/i] SyFy movies, please. They're game.
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i actually enjoyed it a little. mind doing the giant amazon fish movie next? (i forgot the title) you would be doing all your fans in the U.S. a big favor. plus, is it weird that less than 2 day after this movie first aired on SYFY (in the U.S.) this game was posted on armorgames.com ( http://armorgames.com/ play/4703/miami-shark ) :shock: someone must have loved that moment!
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06.03.2010 - 20:16 | Daiul
I'm also surprised that the scientists thought the idea of a giant squid was crazy. Huge scars on the bodies of whales, abyssal gigantism, giant beaks found in the stomachs of sperm whales. Mean anything to you script writers?
Actually this film is about a giant ocotpus.
Oh. . . well that shut me up.
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06.03.2010 - 20:17 | Cross X. Brand
A shark being tentacled to death...Was this thing made by an Anime director??
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Maybe do Paranormal Entity next? hehe