Mat, if theres one film that the masses cant flame you for its this one. Great review, great cameos. Still, it doesnt change the fact that you gave Transformers 2 a higher score than Inglorious Basterds.

Sorry, couldnt resist ;)

[i]Still, it doesnt change the fact that you gave
Transformers 2 a higher score than Inglorious Basterds. [/i]

That one will haunt him for all eternity (to be fair, he said he rated Transformers 2 with his brain turned off in his article - I wonder why the ratings are now gone ...).

Anyway, great review.

cheesoid could you please troll away from here.

Hey Cheesoid - go kill self with petril

Nice ! :D

Uwe Boll is officially the Devil. I'd box him ;)

Yay another BMB! Now im not bored anymore.

An awful Boll movie? Now this is surprising.

I'll be honest, I wasn't that into this series until I got a few episodes in, and now it's totally growing on me.

Keep it up. :)

wait a second. If a car was hanging by a helicopter by a wire and that wire snapped, yes it will go up.

Would it go all the way up to the blades, well depends on tension, but you make it seem like it wouldn't go up at all?

also, who calls a helicopter a "plane"

and who criticized uwe boll's comedy then pretends to punch themselves in the face? that's right about the same level.

I'd like to point out that it also depends on the elasticity of the wire. Wire generally isn't that elastic and thus doesn't bounce back as easily - if the cord was more metal than anything else it wouldn't bounce more than a little bit and then just hang there. it definitely wouldn't swing up high enough to get caught in the blades and bring the helicopter down.

I've never heard of a grappling hook using elastic cord, so the scene is still pretty stupid. :)

Boll must just be trying to prove he's an idiot now if he had Handsome Tom in his movie and cut his scene... :pinch:

As always very enjoyable. Those are some shitty boxing skills dude you might should start kick boxing instead.

So pathetic of an adaptation they couldn't even secure a filming location on a tropical island, which was part of the gimmick in the game.

I haven't seen comedy this painful since... ever. What a horrible movie. Thanks for putting yourself through this for our amusement.

That sucks that Handsome Tom was cut from the film, you know Stuttering Craig of Screwattack is supposed to be in the film as well, his scene probably got cut too, ah well. Probably all the better that way for both of them.

Anyway great review Matt.

OMG. Not Far Cry with Till Schweiger

nice review

Boll needs to die....and hollywood has to stop letting his films get through...

Seriously Uwe Boll just needs to stop for christ sake Edd wood was better then this guy seriously id rather watch plan 9 nine then 2 minutes of his crap

Great review Matt :)

If memory isn't failing me, before Handsome Tom and Stuttering Craig split up they asked for a fund raising in order to appear as extras on this "film". Don't remember the amount but I'm fairly sure that it was quite a lot of money. According to wikipedia both Craig and Tom are in the film.

General Hammond? NOOOOOOOO!

Tell me about it why did Don have to make an Uwe Boll movie one of his last apperances on tv before he passed away?
SCREW YOU BOLL!!!!

now im really ashamed of being German :confused:

I can't watch Til Schweiger without thinking of his character from SLC Punk. That would've probably made this movie a lot better.

I know! IT's crazy Mark from SLC Punk, He was one of the best characters in that movie I loved him and his weird accent in that too, so with that in mind, this review was that much better

Actually, a word on Till in [i]Inglourious Basterds[/i]: I got the impression that he was one of those characters whose presence counted more towards something. Plus, there's no denying that there's something incredibly badass about keeping a gun pointed at someone's testicles for an entire scene of people talking.

But wow, to think that this guy was in such an awful movie! Makes me wonder what Rampage is going to be like...

his character in IG was awesome!

You shouck be hanged by your balls for saying that aswell as anyone who agrees :angry: :angry: :angry: :angry: :angry: :angry:

You should try wording your argument more properly than "YOU SUCK YOU SUCK!!!" if you aren't just baiting for thumbs down.

Film Brain is one of the slightly lesser talents on TGWTG, I'd be lying if I didn't admit I much more look forward to the new NC, Spoony vid or Linkara review than his BMB or text reviews. But he does not "suck", and is up against a lot of strong talent on this site, and with every video he seems to improve. He still needs to work on timing and some aspects of delivery, as well as making sure his comments come across as true flaws in the movie rather than nitpicks (though nobody's going to claim that in THIS review), but he improves on this in each successive video.

I don't agree much with his taste in movies or analysis thereof as comes through in his reviews, but that's a matter of opinion rather than of style. Though with regards to the reviews, there still seems to be a vague air of irritating pretentiousness he seems unable to shake. Maybe its just me, or maybe it will improve over time. Mostly it may be that I'm just so jaded I hate virtually everything in the cinema, and so don't like the fact he's generally so soft and positive in his reviews. As a fan of Alien Nation, I even hated District 9 (and I think just about everyone who saw Alien Nation hated District 9, so much of the plot and setting is ripped off from it they should have a viable plagiarism case). And then he rips into the ONE movie I liked this summer, Inglourious Basterds. But I can forgive him for that, quite a few people don't like Tarantino, though in regards to IB hate in general (and it certainly seemed to come through in his review) it mostly seems to emerge because they don't [i]get[/i] the movie, they accept it at face value and, as such, are rightfully horrified by it.

Christ I've rambled, but I might suggest that you blog some reviews of your own. If Film Brain does indeed "SUCK!!!" then getting on TGWTG should be a cinch, right?

I didn't know they made a Farcry movie and now I feel lesser for knowing.

ohhh Udo... what did you do to yourself? you were AWSOME as Yuri in Red alert 2! ohh the shame

Maybe someone should try their luck with Farcry 2, that game was nothing like the first, and was FUCKING AWSOME.
If they don't use Uwe Boll, it could turn out at least average.

Thanks for your constructive criticism, Hasta la vista.
If you donnot like Filmbrain, stop watching his reviews.
If you want him to do something different, tell him what he should change.

their cold so they take their cloths off... lol and wtf

IIRC they had just gotten out of cold water, meaning their clothes were soaked, meaning there was a risk of hypothermia. Doesn't make the scene any less cliched, of course.

Jesus christ Film Brain, did you do any freaking research for the film?

The whale watching tour is in BC, renowned for its whale watching. Rope, especially entwined steel rope, has a high degree of elasticity, and would spring back to shape if stretched by oh say a car. Almost certianly shooting up a distance before its kinetic energy is depleted.
As for the needle thing, most kevlar that will stop bullets is completely ineffective against a knife. The reason being that the bullet is crushing flesh rather the cutting, and the only reason non-cermaic bullet proof vests even work is by spreading that crushing force into a wider area. Something you *cannot* do with, say, a bladed impliment, or a needle (it just shoves the fibres out of the way).
Also: body armor can only take so many hits before it becomes increasingly less effective. It's not a magic anti-bullet spell Film Brain. As for shooting him in the eye, presumably common freaking sense.
The saw is clearly a lumber saw, as indicated by the sawdust. The laser sight is probably used to tell when enough timber has passed to get a decent size cut of wood.

I don't know whats funnier, the bad continuity jokes throughout the review, or a viewer correcting the bad continuity jokes.

If you're referring to the armor on the super-soldiers who are (or supposed to be) [i]impervious[/i] to bullets, then it shouldn't have knocked it down, even if it the blasts managed to penetrate.

Why would there be a lumber mill on [i]secret research base[/i]?

The rope may have been elasticated but it would not fly upward in a perfect arc like in the film.

I take it FB, that you don't take criticism well.

you say "The rope may have been elasticated but it would not fly upward in a perfect arc
like in the film." but clearly you took time to mention it in the video and then scoff at the idea.

Or at least be a bit less defensive sounding. I don't think any one here would argue that Boll makes bad movies, but if you're going to rip on a scene, and it's not in fact a fact, don't keep that up after it's been called out.

I'm not being aggressively defensive, but it does clearly fly upwards in a way that just isn't possible. I'm not saying that ropes flying upwards is an insult to physics, the way that its depicted in the film is.

go rewatch the part in the video, you seem to be making it clear that the rope wouldn't go up, in any fashion due to gravity.

That's probably due to my piss-poor phrasing. It has got me into trouble before.

It shouldn't have knocked it down, even if it was just a human. Bullets don't have enough force to knock someone off their feet, let alone send them flying.
This was not, however, your complaint in the review.

There's a lumber mill because it's BC, I guess. You should've brought up the fact that it's clearly a rented lumber yard they're filming in. But your criticism in the review was, I quote "What is that even for?", not "Why is that even here?"

As for the rope, watch this:http:// www.youtube.com/watch? v=ox0wpBT52xI& feature=related
A good bit of steel cable flies above were it is attached to the pulley.

I consider your reviews very good Film Brain, and enjoyable. But don't pull a Confused Mathew and sink into poorly researched slough. The Equilibrium review was too good for that.

Did anybody notice that the island is the same from House of the dead?

Another good little review, FB.

You seemed rather unenthusiastic throughout, though.

It's an Uwe Boll movie...it's supposed to be a soul crushing experience.