Hagan Reviews - Dolla Morte

(31 votes, average 4.81 out of 5)

Review

Flubs

Facebook Share
Doug's Official Facebook Page
Comments (23)
  • Minion of Yahtzee  - Oh god this one
    avatar
    This is what would happen if Action League Now was a snuff film. I can see why this is the favored one, because it is cracktasticly insane. Good job, Hail Hagen!
  • PaladinDemo
    avatar
    Directed with miscommunication from the Chaos Gods.
  • Unit112358
    You gave this its due, now if you'll excuse me, I've got to find a Hagan action figure.
  • nowhere
    avatar
    King Diamond? Awww I thought it was Sven Ghoulie!

    Imagine accidentally getting this when you really wanted "Dellamorte Dellamore"! It'd still be better than getting the Britney Spears "Crossroads" when you intended to get the "Crossroads" with Ralph Macchio, Steve Vai and the devil.
  • wolfwing
    can I just say awesome use of Coughlan's, nazi's without apptitude song :> I was WTF I know that voice, forgot all about that song.
  • Axel Osbourne
    avatar
    How can Dracula and Vlad the Impaler both be in this, when they are technically the same person? (Yes, that was my biggest question about this movie, and yes, I know how fuck up that is.)
  • ColeYote
    avatar
    Christ, I'm only at the 9/11 scene and this movie already makes my SOUL hurt.
  • Knochenbrecher
    Why do nazi action figures exist?
    Who are they merchandised to?
    To the same parents who think that videogames are evil?

    And wtf was the train of thought behind making those?
    "You know, Bob, there are already toy-figures of batman, superman and the transformers but there must be something else. Something so funny and joyful that today's kids have to get get their hands on it."
    "Sure, Jim. What little Timmy really needs is... ACTION-ADOLF-HITLER!"

    So many questions...
  • leviadragon99
    avatar
    Well that was... mindbending.
  • andx0r
    avatar
    I lost all decorum and laughed like a deranged gibbon at the insects/yiffing line.
  • Taboggon
    avatar
    This review was absolutely amazing!!
  • Creature SH
    avatar
    For inexplicable reasons, this is one of my absolute favorite Hagan Reviews. Even though the physical acting seemed different from usual.. I wouldn't really say wooden.... Plasticy, maybe? Damndest thing, that.
  • Lieju
    avatar
    I'm not entirely certain in which way the director wanted this to be funny.

    I found it funny, but because it was silly and random, the 'offensive' elements had nothing to do with it. And I guess it lacks sincerity, it's like he went out to create something silly, instead of having a message and trying to get it across. Like Birdemic or Happening, both hilarious movies.

    This guy seems to me like he's just out to offend, which is just pointless to me.

    I mean, sure, if you want to tell this kind of story because you want to criticise US foreign policy, or muslims or feminism or whatever, that I get. But this? Kinda pointless.

    (But comedy is subjective, so if people find this funny, I guess it's done it's job?)
  • 12th
    avatar
    I just want to know what action figure they modded for the Mistress.
  • Creature SH
    avatar
    Take a nazi super scientist with a glue problem, add a semi-feral teenage girl with healing powers and let simmer. Round off with a few sprinkles of an angel and slayer gone bad, then wrap in blaxploitation icon.
  • ladydiskette
    avatar
    Okay this movie....freaking awesome.

    It's fucked up, but I don't think I would expect anything less from a DH review. This kind of "using toys/plushies" as actors in your home movie has a sort of kitchy appeal to me.


    Also, love the DH action figure.
    Does it come with a Ken doll Alistar B'Homeless?
  • Sinburner
    avatar
    Huh.... I think I've lived long enough
    *head explodes*
  • DN_Joseph
    avatar
    I think I remember a poem by Ben Franklin, satirically praising witch hunts, because they used them as an excuse to strip women down in public, to examine them for the mark of the devil or something. I'm sure he'd approve of something like this.
  • HanSK
    avatar
    where did you get the Diamanda Hagan figure from?

    is it a conversion, or do you actually have you'r own line of merchandise?
  • DiamandaHagan
    avatar
    It was a gift from CreatureSH. In the end credits there's a link to his site detailing how he made it.
  • FRSpro
    avatar
    Death looks like Halloweenie
  • StripesZB
    avatar
    Wow, I didn't expect to see something more frantically put together than the Amazing Bulk.
  • Toxic Jellyfish
    avatar
    I feel inspired by this. I should probably be worried... XD

    Hail Hagan!
Only registered users can write comments!

Latest Blogs

No post has been created yet.

Follow us on:

Latest Videos

Linkara: SCI-Spy #6

Watch Video

See NC's Early on Maker

Watch Video

Suede: Fire and Ice

Watch Video

Diamanda: Dr Who Season 20

Watch Video

LAG: YKW - Deep Breath

Watch Video

Todd: Who's That Girl

Watch Video

BB: Pro's n' Cons - Evil Dead 2013

Watch Video

CS: Steel - Hilariocity Review

Watch Video

Leon : Inception Parts 1 & 2

Watch Video

Lotus: Galerians - Ash P4-6

Watch Video

MikeJ: A Week on Baby Food D7

Watch Video

MasakoX: Moe-tan

Watch Video

Lupa: BW - Snake Eyes

Watch Video

Shaun K: Fall of the Tomb Raider

Watch Video

Brad: Nov Man & As Above So

Watch Video

SUaT: Kyle Hebert

Watch Video

iRawss: GH - Boys of Valor

Watch Video

Paw: Quest 4 Glory 4 P7-8

Watch Video

Lupa: BW - Muddy Waters

Watch Video

MikeJ: A Week on Baby Food D6

Watch Video

RC Podcast: Going Off w RC

Watch Video

Brad: Sin City 2 & Dr Who

Watch Video

WMR: Mayuri OP

Watch Video

Sage: Lily CAT

Watch Video

Ursa: SYL 101 - Clueless

Watch Video

AF: Freeman's Mind 58

Watch Video

Brad Tries Chatterbox Beer

Watch Video

MikeJ: A Week on Baby Food D5

Watch Video

Word Funk: Justice Warriors

Watch Video

Lotus: Galerians Ash P1-3

Watch Video

Blog Categories

What's Up? (142)
Sports (264)
News (280)
Book Reviews (555)
Funny (580)
Top # Lists (743)
Animation (942)
Wrestling (999)
Movies (1069)
Anime (1106)
Thoughts (1162)
Comics (1207)
Misc Reviews (1303)
Music (1436)
Video Reviews (1957)
Film Review (2744)
Uncategorized (4033)
Video Games (5250)
Old Blogs (15312)