Bad Movie Beatdown - Tekken (2010)

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Comments (144)
  • Neo Ultra Mike
    Uh, is this a Spoony Review or a FIlm Brain review? Matthew was the one who editted right and it was under his blip account so... dosen't that technically make this his review? I know it's part of Spoony's month of video game movies, but it feels more like a Film Brain reivew really then a Spoony one. This isn't a complaint or anything I just wanted to ask this as I'm confused by the placement of the review.
  • hollychristine
    it was scheduled by Spoony so it went under his menu. the menus are essentially visible indices so we can't place it under both unless we literally double post.
  • Vismutti
    Film Brain doesn't have his own site, though, right? So considering that I think it'd be better to list this under his menu so his future fans would find it more easily (since Spoony's fans probably check his own site anyway). Although I admit that this is kinda more Spoony's review than Film Brain's since it was Spoony's video game movie month and Spoony's introduction and Spoony's opening...
  • ladydiskette
    I have to admit I was a little confused at first myself Holly. Glad that was cleared up.
  • ultramanmattia
    I really disliked this movie.

    First of all:Why they had to set a movie based on Tekken,in a post apocalyptic world? This is not Riki-Oh or Fist of The Northstar.
  • BooRat
    I was fixxin to say this reminded me more of Fist of the North Star than anything!
  • LordNifty
    It is on Spoony's personal site as well. Spoony seemed to be the main narrator, but it did seem more compact than a typical Spoony review, where Spoony goes off on tangents(usually funny ones, though). Film Brain does help a number of people on this site with their videos, even if he doesn't appear in them, so keep that in mind.

    Oh, and the review was pretty good. This was interesting in that they each managed to get their comments in, without getting in each other's way. However, it would have been nice to have more interaction between the two. Seeing Film Brain's reactions to Spoony at the end made me smile, though.
  • ladydiskette
    I am with Spoony, how bad is the "King of Fighters"?

    Surely its not THAT horrible right?

    Right? >__>
  • almozayaf
    KOF is my fav game ever

    i never think see bad movie can gave you trauma

    for weeks i can't think af any thing exapet how bad thy make it
    and i was thinking they will make bad movie =_=

    so thy blow down my expectations and my expectations was to low in the first place

    but KOF movie do one good think it make me love tekken movie, yah TEKKEN is Citizen Kane in comparison.

    tekken do same few things right at last
    KOF do nothing it like thy try to make bad movie intentional.

    i say KOF movie made by ppl how haet KOF games
  • Amesang
    I love the "The Street Fighter" with Sonny Chiba as much as the next guy, but I think Jin's taken his admiration for the film a bit too far with his power-up inducing flashbacks.

    After seeing this review, I have to agree with Spoony that it's a fun film. Not a good film, but fun. It is certainly an odd take on the storyline, and I would've liked to have seen how they would've handled King and Xiaoyu; and what about Paul Phoenix!?

    I eagerly await the next film in Spoony's list, as it's based on my favorite fighting game series of all time.
  • Taufiq91
    When will filmakers realise that making a movie based on a fighting game will suck?

    And they don't make lots of money unlike a decade ago. I mean, i doubt a King of Fighters film would make lots of money like Mortal Kombat.

    And as mentioned, Tekken and the Legend of Chun-Li flopped in Japan, so i doubt there is still a market for film adaptation of fighting games.
  • SilenceoftheHills  - To Taufiq91
    I disagree. A fighting game mostly has character bios to work around, of established characters traits, emoional or powerful back stories or other. If a tournament, they need to give it the same appeal as Karate Kid or other films, that have heart along with it. They can make it work as they have only a base to work with. The problem is that they think change of a primitive base was what made it good, rather the actual thought process of presenting elements in the best way possible within the letter of a script. If that's hard, then get out of the movie making bussiness. I tire of movie makers not treating VG ideas as like a comic's.

    More “out there” ideas worked in the past and even today, in comic book adaptations or other, so it can fit in as diversity.

    I think the problem is that they aren't very good in general. You don't take flaws of certain films and say its all over. That's to say all these films share the same blunders. Hollywood is always like this, saying that there is only one guy to adapt something. X-Men, while a decent film, was made by one who admitted he couldn't do alot of people in a film. We know how that turned out with with alot of nice characters either becoming quick cameos, stoic or killed very soon.

    Yeah, the series needs a SpiderMan/BatMan Begins style reboot, rather a prequel that offers much more depth than any of the trilogy, only having it work its way back up into that depressing fan service or half there trilogy. I mean, Logan can't even tell if a cat is behind him, then contradicts his ability to smell out Mystique from the first, giving much to the cat scene in showing he can't specifically smell out anyone as before. Its like what they say for Superman Returns in his abilities going up and down. Also, the suits were ok then, but now that they have the blue suits, that means these are the nicely diverse suits of the 90’s comics and before, instead. Wrinkly coat lether looks like armor, Singer? No, that would be latex rubber that looks like metallic body armor. I think Watchmen is the way the xmen series artwork and “costumes” or body suits should have looked. Just look at how awesome and colorful the settings of first class are and how much better it is from the dank and depressing trilogy.
  • Relaxo
    Crap, I knew this was gonna hurt. I've loved the Tekken games since I was like 6 years old.
  • WhitestShadow
    "Since you were six" so I guess that ending they show at the end of this video has haunted your dreams ever since XD
  • King Raptor
    To be honest, Lee's ending in Tekken 5 does not bother me one bit. Heihachi in a speedo? Not terrifying at all. Now, if you put Jinpachi in a speedo......
  • Relaxo
    Yeah pretty much this. I remember just thinking it was funny.
  • MaxieMagyx
    I'd like some of those super empowering flashbacks m'self. =( Like while doing the dishes I'll remember my father doing the dishes, and then I'll do the dishes even better! Could be useful.
  • Grimfang
    f*** ya i loved that ending from the game. will u review the new tekken movie?
  • TheDogSannin
    Eh, its not bad. It's not GOOD, but its not bad. It's... Meh. Like FB said, it's pretty much a generic fighting movie, only with Tekken characters put in.

    Honestly, you could replace the Tekken characters with any other fighting game cast, and not really change it all that much.
  • ThomasFyrehart
    I'm a massive Tekken fan, so it'd probably be hard for me to sit through the annoying changes.

    Why did they even bother changing the name of the company? Calling it the Mishima Zaibatsu makes more sense than naming it after the game. Hell, they even shortened the name of the tournament for no reason. It's King Of Iron Fist Tournament, why bother changing that? There's no reason to!

    Oh well, at least the fight scenes seem to be good. And to be honest that's the only reason I'd watch this movie, for the fight scenes. If a movie adaptation of a fighting game can't make the fight scenes watchable they've failed anyway, so I guess this movie succeeded in that respect at least.
  • Mexman75  - Not so fast Film Brain!
    Actually the Beatles was formed and began performing about 5 years before the Monkees existed so ACTUALLY The Beatles influenced the Monkees not the other way around.....wait arent you British!
  • Film Brain
    That's the joke. It's also a Dumb and Dumber reference.
  • brick mooncode
    The fighters are like a modern-day equivalent of gladiators, so the fights having a positive social effect doesn't confuse me. What does confuse me is how corporations could somehow take the place of governments when they collapse, instead of collapsing along with them.
  • Kylekillgannon
    Soooo....Basically the film's plot is the rise of CM Punk?
  • Shinigami
    I disagree with Spoony. Even with its flaws anime was little better than this live action movie. But then again I actually like from anime instead of hating it by default.
  • mrrubino
    If you like 90s action anime unconditionally, you may want to look at more media.
  • FunkyM
    Yay! Great vid FB/Spoony!

    And it does look entertaining. Too bad I don't know tekken from a hole in the ground.
  • LikaLaruku
    34 million dollar loss? Ouch!

    Oh gawd, that old man looks like the unholy lovechild of Zeno Zoldyek & Count Olaf. I can't help but laugh every time I see him.

    So how quickly would you die if you took a shot of beer every time someone said Tekken?
  • NiktheBeast
    I rather liked this movie. Odd really, I find myself on the opposite side of the fence with film brain a lot lately. You have to see it for what it is though, it's not some shakepearian(is that evena word?) masterpiece but it was enjoyable and I had fun with it.
  • Zombifaction
    You hit basically every point I wanted to see hit and it was in total a good review.

    Sadly I couldn't enjoy the movie because of what they did to the characters. And really the story could have been done much easier. Just a massive fighting tournament that offers prize money and a seat of power in the world like the game said. And each character has their own reasons to join. Done!

    Also the face that some characters like Jin was has only ever spoken in Japanese in the games has a thicker British accent than Steve Fox a British boxer who in the games has the British flag on his shorts.

    So I'm leaning more with Film Brain than Spoony. Good action well choreographed fights but nothing special and far too generic.
  • Kaiju-Z
    My opinion of the movie is as mixed as the opinions of the two are different.
    I loved the movie, but at the same time hated what they did with some of the characters D:
  • KamikazeKitten
    Its incredible how much nicer everyone is being in the commments here than on Spoony's site. They all want their precious Spoony to stay solo instead of doing crossovers, Spoony is a grown man who can make his own decisions and if he wants to do crossovers then thats his choice. Anyway I thought this review was very informative, and yes this is one of the better fighting movies. The fights are alright I guess. Oh that last part at the end got a good chuckle out of me :D
  • Shinigami
    I was shocked how over hostile people in there were towards Film Brain and most of it come purely from fact that he is british. I'm not his biggest fan but I thought that all that hate that he got in there is ridicilous.
  • Rulke55
    I know it's freaking shocking! Every complaint was his language, which I live in UK and I don't notice anything they say.
  • KamikazeKitten
    Most of the people sending idiotic, nasty comments on Spoony's site are fanboys with narrow minds, not willing to accept a little bit of diversity. Sad, really.
  • undeadaRTie
    I also share the sentiment.
    Actually, after browsing through the comments on Spoony's site, I had to come back here, just see some actual input in the comments section. Personally, I've been interested to see Spoony and Film Brain do a crossover. And I wouldn't mind seeing them work together again.
  • KamikazeKitten
    I think they worked well too, they reminded me of an older brother and a younger brother fighting over something XD
  • Gilga
    They didnt want spoony to stay solo...

    Most of the feedback was about Film Brains way to stretch out the last word of every sentence. It was bugging me also but I doesent mean I hate the guy.
  • KamikazeKitten
    Yes, actually, they were. They were telling him to stop doing crossovers, not just with Film Brain but with the other members of TGWTG. As if Spoony is their bitch, they were almost ordering him to continue doing videos by himself. It was that, plus the ignorance that was smeared all over the comments. Most of the Spoony fanboys don't get Film Brain's style and it scared them away.
  • RussianFighter  - This is shit!
    That's a terrible movie.
    Only good thing it's realistic fights and that's all.
    For Fans of Tekken games this movie are real shit!

    P.S. - Film Brain got horrible voice!!!
  • Rulke55
    P.S. This is TGWTG site, not Spoony's. Go back there...
  • ionpath
    Ah great, love crossover reviews and spoony and film brain were great.
  • Strider_Reborn  - An ok yet flawed film...
    I consider the Anime to be a "Guilty Pleasure" but the Live Action movie actually had some ok fightscenes despite some of the Random WTF moments and Jin being a cheating douchebag.

    In the videogames Jun & Kazuya's relationship was left ambiguous and it was never implied that Jin was born out of Rape. Also The Bryan I know wouldnt give a shit about money or being blackmailed. He was a killing machine with a thirst for battle and as another plot-hole If cybernetics are considered "Illegal" in this tournament wouldnt Yoshimitsu be banned as well? He's supposed to be cybernetic too.
  • King Raptor
    IIRC, Yoshi becomes a cyborg after Tekken 2.
  • Keiji
    I like the more recent portrayal of Film brain's character. Sadistic and deceptively derpy closeted homoman. It's interesting to see him in so many cameo's with this expression of the character.
  • Enshidia
    Loved to see this review. They made Kazuya a badarse in this.
    First exposure to Film Braaaaaain. I don't like how he stresses the last word of his seeeeeentence. Very disconcerrrrning.
    Also, love the 'I HEARD that, Curtis' shirt. When did Spooney put those out?
  • Shocksuspect  - I liked the movie
    I'm with Spoony with this one, the movie has got a lot of negative criticism but if you treat the film as a B-Movie romp and you just sit down and enjoy the movie, then it's really not that bad. And I'm a huge Tekken fan. I mean, yeah, I was disappointed they didn't include characters like Paul Phoenix and the plot of the movie didn't really have anything to do with the game, but if you just ignore all that then you will enjoy watching this.
  • Meiriona
    Luke? NUADA! Drool worthy tormented prince of the elves from Hellboy II with that heart breaking show of emotion in every little expression, yet...this?

    I'll just assume it was a paycheck.

    Good god, those ass shots. How...that cannot be comfortable.

    Also, end bit, I'm with Film Brain, WTF?!?! Even for Japan.....
  • JiCi
    You know it's a bad thing when even the game's producer, Katsuhiro Harada, critizes and pans the movie all over. It's that awful...

    The fight scenes are the only thing that are well done, with most character likelinesses, but the rest is just bad:
    - an old Steve Fox, when he's about 20 in the games... AND the son of Nina Williams.
    - Anna Williams does nothing in the tournament.
    - Kazuya with a goatie...
    - Christie Monteiro as a NON-capoeira fighter
    and the list goes on...

    Finally, you might need rehab after reviewing the KOF movie, Spoony, it's even more awful.
  • LevelUpLeo
    With "The Return of The Incredible Hulk", "The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning" and now this, isn't this Matthew's third crossover in as many weeks? Who's next, CR? The Nostalgia Critic? Seriously, either of those would be awesome...
  • Wander
    I already said this on the anime review comments section... This is the better movie. I really went into watching Tekken waiting for something ridiculously bad, something similiar to the Dragonball movie but this was miles above that thing.

    Yeah, the fight scenes are pretty much rinse and repeat, but atleast they are cool. The premise is unoriginal, but really... I don't think this movie even tries to be more than a B-action flick with nice fight scenes and gratuitious ass shots... So uh... What can I say? I enjoyed it.
  • JSN
    I hated this film. They made Kazuya look like a whiny bitch...and appearently he's a rapist now. -.- Lets not forget Heihachi who acts NOTHING like his video game counterpart.
    The animated film was much closer to the characters than this. And wtf, Steve Fox gives Jin the red gloves? I could do a 20 page hate speech on this film.
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