Nekromantik

Nekromantik

Written by Brad Jones Thursday, 28 July 2011 22:29

1
2
3
4
5

(99 votes, average 4.88 out of 5)

Don't forget to check out The Cinema Snob's website here!

Doug's Official Facebook Page

Order the 4th Year Anniversary autographed image! Less Than 100 Left! Once they're gone they're gone!

Comments (97)

<< Start < Prev 1 2 3 Next > End >>

07.28.2011 - 22:34 | Jackass Mask

I've seen this and part of the sequel. There was a lot of puking involved for everyone watching. Especially in the second movie where she comes back up with that green stuff on her mouth. *shudders* I think I feel another retch coming just from the memory.

07.29.2011 - 07:37 | Lee is Still Gaming

Super challenge. I ate waffles while watching this.

07.29.2011 - 07:54 | Jackass Mask

I bow to your ability, sir.

07.30.2011 - 09:15 | ladydiskette

Ugh, okay, I can probably (key word "probably") see a Necrophiliac maybe having sex with a freash corpse that died minutes afterwards. But seriously, you have to be pretty fucked up in the head even by Necrophilic standards to try and make love to a decaying rotten corpse with parts falling off and stuff. Gross!

Thank god Jerrid's hairyness distracted me from the movie.

07.29.2011 - 00:17 | Zbua

The title card art keeps getting more hilarious. Props to the artist who keeps fueling my nightmares.

07.29.2011 - 00:23 | TheDued92

Oh god I have herd of this movie a wile ago. Saw a clip of it and never saw it again, had some nightmares.

07.29.2011 - 00:40 | TheWildhawke

I'm pretty sure I have a man crush on Brad. Of all the reviewers I want him to be my friend the most. Absolutely the coolest reviewer without even trying.

Also, the after credits easter egg way more worth it than Wolverine: Origins

07.29.2011 - 00:36 | August M.

I agree, he's the best on this site. He never disappoints.

08.01.2011 - 09:35 | DangerasTM - i concur

oh yeah totally i love ripping on bad films all the time and my friends dont understand it so itl be cool to hang with someone who doesnt mind sitting down to watch shitty asylum movies and still have a blast which reminds me i need to see their sherlock holmes one

07.29.2011 - 00:39 | August M.

When I saw the initials of JSA on the van, for some reason I thought of the Justice Society of America.

07.29.2011 - 01:07 | honestiago

The whole necrophilia thing reminds me of this awesome poem by Frank Bidart, titled "Herbert White," that's about a man who murders children and has sex with their corpses. It even got turned into a short film that was directed by James Franco. I can't comment on that film, not having viewed it, but if you want a weird mixture of "artsy" and pulp, I'd highly recommend the poem.

I loved the "Blue Velvet" reference, by the way.

Damn it, I seem to have become snobbier since I started watching this show. Curse you, Cinema Snob! You have infected me with your pretentious, pretentious virus! Well, at least it had the side effect of making me better looking than all those other viewers...

07.29.2011 - 01:23 | chives1994

My God Jerrid is like a gorilla!

07.29.2011 - 09:54 | mrskippy

...Or "the Geek."

References! :D

07.29.2011 - 01:58 | Terraqueous - ........

.........I just...no...no...that's not...no.

07.29.2011 - 02:03 | Eye Carumba

I got a huge laugh out of "Be gone, hairy neighbor!"

08.04.2011 - 13:22 | TheDogSannin

"I'm busy talking about corpse fucking."

Shows how well Jerrid knows Brad considering he was non-chalant after hearing those words.

07.29.2011 - 02:10 | lucariofan508

Why did I decide to watch this before I go to sleep?

07.29.2011 - 03:04 | Meiriona

Better than my choice, breakfast time

07.29.2011 - 03:12 | drug

Awesome subtitles! They make it really hilarious, considering what is actually said in German ;). It's like those old Bud Spencer and Terence Hill movies that have a completely rewritten dub in German that aided greatly to its status in todays Germany ;).

07.29.2011 - 03:30 | ThatGuyWithTheSaxophone

...are UNFUCKING BELIEVABLE!

I feel offended as a German-speaking person! Nothing, I repeat, NOTHING of the dialogue in the scenes, you showed with subtitles, had ANYTHING to do with necrophilia - it was all casual, or to say, normal dialogue! Not a single line of subtitles is right!

It seems, somebody wanted to make the movie more interesting or something, however, made it even stupider, because, I suppose, not even necrophiliacs talk about necrophilia all the time!

Ok, they are fake on purpose, I understand - or not - but they still suck rotten corpse testicles ;-)

07.29.2011 - 20:10 | SlyJustin - lol

Hey genius, he mentions in the review that the subtitles are fake, and even adds a obviously more fake one at the end... rewatch it

07.29.2011 - 03:43 | mehja - Correct subtitels

The subtitels are fake? Hell yeah.
The should correct be named "Shit I made up while watching this movie".
(As German I am not offended by the subtitels being "bad" - it's a movie about corpse fucking! Does someone really remember the dialogue more than the imagery?)

Correct subtitels:

2:02
If you’ve got to get out in the next ten minutes again we will never arrive.
My God (annoyed, eye rolling)
(...)*can’t make it out*

3:10
Joe’s clean up operation

4:48
Without wanting to speculate, one can assume that such reactions in entirely different human aversion such as dirt...

5:50
Well guys, call it a day. Oh, Rob – you’ll drop the guy off.

8:54
What’s up with you? You (…) us. Get going! (…) Get up!

9:05
You see, I have to depend on the judgement of my foreman. Get downstairs, get your papers.

9:15
I loved you since the first day we met Hans. But I never hoped that you could love me too.

9:30
You are such a (lit. looking like) wimp. You were probably standing in front of your boss like this as well. Standing there, looking down on your feet and saying nothing.

9:45
… sacrificing the best years of my life to you. Our friend I …

15:15
… was smelling like a pig and even wanted it from behind…

07.29.2011 - 03:50 | Misfit Slacker

Wow, that looks gross. I'm not sure I could subject myself to that... and yet I would watch it in a second if someone I knew had it.

Great, hilarious review, as always.

07.29.2011 - 03:58 | neytari

Haha that ending was awesome. HI, HAIRY NEIGHBOR!!!

(Thanks for the correct subtitles, Mehja)

07.29.2011 - 03:59 | MrThorbjoern

Well, the K in the title is german, so its just not translated

07.29.2011 - 04:03 | Shinigami

Thats one sick movie.

07.29.2011 - 04:25 | Marconius

So could someone living in the US explain to us why it's not okay to show nipples on Blip, but it -is- okay to show people have sex with a corpse and do the thing with the eyeball and the pipe and the... guuuuuh...

Seriously, this was just disgusting. I can understand why the Japanese release had to be cut so severely.

07.29.2011 - 05:31 | FrankN.Stein

Nice - taking on a German Kult Klassik. (all K's intended - that's how we spell around here - it really is)
And cult status is has - opposed to everything else German Brad warched so far. (We are more than just ET porn and necrophilia, I assure you)

And by the way, "Säuberungsaktion" means "Cleaining action" - a little strange name for a company even in German, but clearly with an intended subtext - the word has a very totalitarian vibe to it. It's one of the word the Nazis loved to use. And Neo Nazis still love. So... Crab Shack is fine as a translation ;)

07.29.2011 - 08:47 | droppingpenny

"We are more than just ET porn and necrophilia, I assure you"

Indeed we are, we are also an endless source of crappy films about WW1/WW2, films about east Germany and really bad comedy...

07.29.2011 - 05:38 | Teacup

All I can say is that this was one of the grossest reviews you've done yet, which makes it one of the best.

Sometimes I make my girlfriend watch your reviews because it's funny to see her reaction, and she normally wouldn't watch videos like yours.

This time? There's no way I'd ever get her to watch it. So I described it to her in detail as soon as she woke up. Yayyy!

Looking forward to your next one. :D

07.29.2011 - 05:57 | ernesto79

Relax about the subtitles ^^

though, honestly, understanding the dialogue makes them so much more hilarious ^^

And I am a little dissapointed tgwtg community :)
no offensive comments on germans like it is done so regularly on japanese in the anime reviews? ;-p

Still this is just disgusting, though I am not sure if I find this more disgtusting then Braindead. Cant really compare them I guess ^^

Nice Review Brad :)

07.29.2011 - 06:14 | hsin

Hi, Jerrid!

07.29.2011 - 06:21 | wdbisl

This movie makes me feel sick. I need a shower after this I don't feel clean... just ewww Also I think the beautiful music in the dead sex scene makes it more disturbing.

07.29.2011 - 06:21 | Kill It With Fire

Best Jerrid cameo EVAR

07.29.2011 - 06:32 | Iancettuaun

uuuuuhm... bigfoot in pajamas-cameo?

07.29.2011 - 06:40 | TheAtomic

Why is it that when I have something delicious to eat I notice that you have a new video available?

I had to put down my restaurant-style nachos with guacamole and melted cheese away because some asshole started fucking a dead guy!

07.29.2011 - 07:05 | AaronJer

I actually had to fight throwing up while watching that.

...

I'm impressed!

07.29.2011 - 07:06 | Doresh

Wow, your first review that genuinely disgusted me. Congrats, Brad ^^ !

How in the f*ck can my country censor the shit out of classic horror movies like "Dawn of the Dead" and "John Carpenter's The Thing", all while letting our own film producers make crap like THIS (all while completely denying their existance)? And who in the hell wants to fuck corpses Oo ?!
At least the subtitles where funny...

P.S.: We Germans use "k" more often than "c", so the title is correct.

07.29.2011 - 07:27 | blackmaniac

Well, you were right, Cinema Snob. The english subtitles have NOTHING to do with the actual dialouge.

07.29.2011 - 07:33 | kuijiblob

Lol best part was when Jerid? I think comes in to borrow bread

Only registered users can write comments!

Powered by Compojoom comment 4.2.1

Latest Videos

RSS Feeds

Partners: