TGWTG User Blogs

(Originally Submitted on June 23, 2008)

I've held off on presenting this for quite awhile, basically because I wanted to start up a challenge to the gamers to come up with what they thought would make for an original game. Then supposedly I would blow everyone away with mine.

But given recent events, I think it's time to just come out and show what I've got.

================================================

For George Carlin.

================================================

I call this one......"Bad Baby!!"

You play the role of a 47-year-old semi-retarded alcoholic that has an adult-baby fetish.

After an accident drinking tainted breastmilk, this freak manbaby has the oddball superpower to crush his enemies with his sonic manbaby-cry. Secondary weapons would involve a lead rattle, beer bottles painted white to look like baby ba-ba's, toy horsey Shurikens, a touch-activated talking teddy bear, and his own loaded diaper.

The controls can be simplified to the classic TMNT style of jump and attack, but to really take advantage of the extended attack options, a third attack button would let you you use whatever was in your sub-weapon slot at the time, and a fourth would let you use your charged-up sonic manbaby cry. Controlling the Manbaby can be as easy as using either the D-pad or the analog stick.

Levels would include:

* Generic street level with hordes of disgusted citizens and lowly cops on the beat.

* A drunken rage at a local biker bar.

* Brawling with security on the set of the Spring Jerringer Show.

* A drug-induced stroll through a very colorful land of candy (Which turns out to be another generic street level after completing it).

and

* A local gun-toting militia consisting of, surprisingly, rival manbabies with the sole intent of taking you down.

Bonus games would involve getting burped by a very embarassed hooker, attempting to use cuteness to get out of a public indecency arrest, picking the perfect mother to breastfeed with, and scaring real babies at a day-care center by making faces with the analog sticks, face buttons, and the shoulder buttons.

My lack of experience with the Xbox 360 can only leave me to wonder if there's ways of using the x360 headset to send voice commands into the game itself (like Lifeline and the SOCOM games for the PS2). If so, then there could be room for even more insane shit.

There could be a cheat code screen where you only see the Manbaby staring at the player, and the analog sticks control which way his hands rub his fat hairy manboobs (Clicking the analog sticks would squeeze the manboobs), and if you do the proper motions while saying certain phrases or talking a certain way in the headset, you could unlock various cheats. But the method would be so disturbing that, well, why would you WANT to?

The cheat code entry would also be recorded and sent to XBox Live for contest purposes of who can make the funniest and/or most disturbing variation of a cheat code entry.Obviously, you have to reward the winners with something, so give them Microsoft Points. They earned it.....sick fucks.

Direct all hate-mail to This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it :-D

Comment (0)

I've already proved that the scariest things about horror movie baddies are their weapons. But, what if the killer possesses no real weapons? Take werewolves, vampires, and zombies for example. Most of the time, these types of monsters don't use a weapon to do away with their prey. Nope. They use their hands, claws, teeth, anything to make sure their victim ends up dead. (Though, technically you could say that they also eat their victims afterwards. But that's beside the point.) So, what makes these guys scary? I think in these cases, it's the way they all look. I mean, sure the knowledge that the can actually do things to you with only their bare hands is also very frightening. But sometimes knowledge just isn't enough.

So, in the beginning, they had the Wolf Man, Dracula, and the original Night of the Living Dead. And all these characters were scary in their time. But as special effects grew more modern, people were no longer frightened by harry men, fanged pale guys, and people painted grey with black circles around their eyes. People were looking for more gruesome things to provoke their scared side. Naturally, Hollywood was happy to comply. They started making villains who were not only evil and scary, they were also gruesome and hideous.

Not only was Hollywood making their villains uglier, they were also giving them abilities above and beyond just mind control and immortality. Some villains could now bend time, warp reality, and bring your worst fears to wild, screaming life. The result was bigger, better, and badder killers.

Comment (6) Read More...

do not pay any attention to this poster it is not fun i can grantee that you have never seen a movie like this nor should you.

it makes no sense,its  sick,its disgusting ...............its porn LITERALLY

Comment (2) Read More...