I regret that my childhood spooled itself to the very end, and I never had the chance to witness Pee-Wee Herman teaching me lessons about crack.
I also never saw the anti-smoking ad with R2D2, but I do clearly recall a smoking PSA featuring the cast of "Cats." Yes, the cast of the famous musical, complete with the furry cat costumes and funky cat make-up. Betty Buckly, Grimbleshanks, and all the rest were singing a catchy and annoying speak-song about how horrible it was to smoke cigarettes.
"Cats have nine lives with eight to spare. Human have one with none to part. Why do they smoke? Why don't they care?"
"Listen to Cats, you men and women. Take care of your lungs. They're only human."
At the time, I took the ads in stride. Looking back, I realize that they were something of an abomination.
Now all we need is Mr. N. Critic reviewing the PSAs about "touching."
Oh Mr. Critic, you have just made my week. A hat off for "Double Dare" (1986-198, for "Family Double Dare" (1989), and "Super Sloppy Double Dare" (also 1989, I think)
I, like every third kid in America, desperately wanted to be on this show, but my parents would never drive me out to where the auditions were held. I think they were in Burbank.
I also had the Home Game version, which, it has been mentioned, suggested that you soak the game pieces in water instead of slime to approximate the filth. Even at the time, I could see that a water-soaked foam ball was a far cry from a 5-foot-wide peanut butter sandwich or an enormous plastic nose full of "snot."
I recall having one of my first boyhood crushes on the female assistant. Not because she was a bikini babe or anything prurient. Just the fact that she worked on "Double Dare" drew me to her. But I admit, I had weird crushes as a kid.
I also fondly recall the episode of "Family Double Dare" in which the special celebrity guests were Lou Ferrigno and "Weird Al" Yankovic. Putting "Weird Al" on "Double Dare" was my version of watching Frasier and Ali fight.
One more thing. You mentioned that it was on Nickelodeon, which is no doubt true, but I watched it on network TV in Los Angeles. Perhaps we kids in L.A. without cable were the lucky ones. We still got to see it.
This was a question that sparked a weeks-long debate in my friends house. His dad felt that genuine lust could not be held for an animted charactar (this was around the time "Who Framed Roger Rabbit?" was in theaters, so it was on our minds). My friend, on the other hand, felt, well, lust for animated characters. It's easy to hold them in yuor mind as erotic images (just like, say, porn), but can you actually, earnestly, picture having sex with them? One for the philosophers.
Was I weird in that I had a crush on Babs Bunny?
Actually, the full tagline of "Bebe's Kids" was "It's animation with attitude," but I do remember seeing ads that accidentally omitted the "with attitude" part. It sounded as if the announcer wasn't sure of himself: "It's animation..?"
I recall a similar incident with the movie "Switch" the plot of which involved a man getting killed, and immediately being resurrected in the body of Ellen Barkin (not too terrible a fate if you ask me). Jimmy Smitts played his/her best friend. The preview for "Switch" would spool to the very end, and then an announcer, usually a different announcer than the one already heard, would quickly insert the word "Jimmy Smitts." No "also starring" or "with." Just "Jimmy Smitts." Funny stuff.
They did this on MST3K once. Blew my mind.
Keep up the good work, Mr. Critic. I can relate to many of the video-game-destructive impulses on display in this video. Continue the "Point Break" references.
I never did see this film. But, thanks to you, now I don't feel I have to. You remembered it for me. Thank you for the great service you do.
Did anyone else catch that the boyfriend of the Cox character was named Kevin Corrigan? The indie actor from "Slums of Beverly Hills," "Detroit Rock City," "The Departed," "Superbad," and many others? (His IMDb page: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0180984/) Perhpas the character would have been more interested if he was played by Kevin Corrigan.
No doubt I will repeat your line about "The Thundercats on their way to see 'The Rocky Horror Picture Show.'" to friends.
Also, did anyone else wince about the laser battle in the record store? All I could think about was all the rare vinyl, collectible 45s, and hard-to-find Zappa albums that were being destroyed. And to think there was a time when record stores were so common, that they could be used as laser battle fodder. All my local record stores have been closing. It makes me sad.
A churlish debate, I know, and one that is as overplayed as "Trek" vs. "Wars,"
or James Bond vs. Indiana Jones, but one that I am nerd enough to address...
I fall squarely on the side of "Tiny Toon Adventures." While "Animaniacs" had a
slighly more anarchic spirit, and some truly side-splitting moments, the tone was
a little too scattershot, and the lows were REALLY low. For every "finger Prince"
joke, there was a character or serial that really just grated on the nerves.
Buttons and Mindy are the most annoying cartoon characters since Tigger (and have
also, like Tigger, accumulated numerous ladyfans who only like thier cloying
cutesyness), Katie Kaboom, Chicken Boo, and Slappy Squirrel had no real jokes,
and the GoodFeathers were way too inside a reference for any kids. Heck, I didn't
see "GoodFellas" until I was 19. Are kids really so familiar with the Scorsese film
that they can laugh at the subtle references?
Admittedly, "Tiny Toons" was bland in comparison. The jokes were a bit more traditional,
and one can easily accuse it of being a mere rehash of Looney Tunes moagic, rather
than the "reinvention" it was shooting for. The writing was often bad.
However, the characters were stronger than in "Animaniacs." Buster, Babs, and
especially Plucky Duck, seemed to have complete dramatic lives, and real human traits.
Yakko, Wakko, and Dot (themselves derived from Goopy, Foxy and Roxy from "Tiny Toons")
were uninteresting Vaudeville joke machines. Funny, yes. But thin.
I was more impressed with the overall complete world of friendly
(and only sometimes badly written) characters, than with the wacky
(and frequently badly written) joke-a-minute riffing of overworked WB scripters.
But enough of my essay. What do you think?
The coach in the AIDS portion sounded a lot like Rudy Ray More from the bizarro blaxploitation movie "Avenging Disco Godfather."
"Put yo' WEEEEEIIIGHT on it!"
I also like the Rodent Man's whispering. "PssPssPssPss." I can picture the actor making that noise in the recording booth, and it makes me giggle.
I'm grateful that Cap'n Planet passed me by. I think I was busy watching the TV-edited versions of the Looney Tunes shorts on another station. Or perhaps "Tranzor Z" on PBS. As a kid, I became so sick of the environmentalist "movement" (or, more specifically, its ancillary entertainments like "Captain Planet and the Planeteers") that I began to encourage my friends to litter and pollute. I guess I felt if people really wanted a clean planet, they'd spend more time cleaning, and less time making crappy cartoon shows.
These days I recycle, bike, and bring my own bags to the grocery store. See, Mr. Turner? One can do environmentally friendly things without your show.
I think "Saved By the Bell" pioneered the trend of harmless bland live-action crap for kids, leading to personlity-less creations like "High School Musical."
Well, perhaps it was presaged by the bland kids on '80s sitcoms like "Silver Spoons" and "Charles in Charge."
...Which were probably presaged by the bland kids on '70s cartoons shows like "Scooby Doo." Which were, in turn, visions of The Young Generation as envisioned by children of the '50s... Yeah. I guess blandness started in the '50s and it lives on today. Before that, there wasn't a lot of children's entertainment, and no pop television.
Also, seeing Zack in his pop star outfit just made me want to watch "Cool as Ice" again. Hey, Mr. Critic, you oughtta review "Cool as Ice."
, for "Family Double Dare" (1989), and "Super Sloppy Double Dare" (also 1989, I think)
I, like every third kid in America, desperately wanted to be on this show, but my parents would never drive me out to where the auditions were held. I think they were in Burbank.
I also had the Home Game version, which, it has been mentioned, suggested that you soak the game pieces in water instead of slime to approximate the filth. Even at the time, I could see that a water-soaked foam ball was a far cry from a 5-foot-wide peanut butter sandwich or an enormous plastic nose full of "snot."
I recall having one of my first boyhood crushes on the female assistant. Not because she was a bikini babe or anything prurient. Just the fact that she worked on "Double Dare" drew me to her. But I admit, I had weird crushes as a kid.
I also fondly recall the episode of "Family Double Dare" in which the special celebrity guests were Lou Ferrigno and "Weird Al" Yankovic. Putting "Weird Al" on "Double Dare" was my version of watching Frasier and Ali fight. 
