Those glasses scare me...glad you got rid of them
Condemned 2
Written by Bennett the Sage Friday, 24 July 2009 00:22
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Comments (63)
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07.23.2009 - 20:29 | Coldguy
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07.23.2009 - 20:39 | NoNostalgiaReviews
very odd review for sage, I liked it though, I know how you feel btw with the store, there was one near where i lived named Xuveon but it closed down and nothing like it has come in. shame too.
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07.23.2009 - 20:41 | RadicalNewt
Wow, that game looks brutal, I'd play it but I think I'd end up with shat pants, I'm a total wuss. Nice review as always, I loved the monty python bit at the beginning, especially when the caption at the bottom called you out as a monty python fan xD
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07.23.2009 - 20:46 | TheTedditz
How dare this dude to destroy a gamer's paradise ? He deserves the ultimate death sentance...being forced to play Action 52 all day long...for eternity.
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07.23.2009 - 20:48 | masterem243
Pink Floyd FTW!
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07.23.2009 - 20:55 | DaeicaGood one Sage, but if you're going to do an intro like that again, please make it to the point. After the first 10 times you said C'mon repeatedly after one another, I have to admit I started twitching abit. So yeah, basically more to the point I suppose, and don't repeat yourself so much.
Though, the review itself had good valid points, I have to admit the whole setup for the bum fights wasn't really something I was looking for in Condemned 1, and due to Condemned 2's explaination, I was happy they didn't include it in the first one. Infact, it should just have been let out entirely.
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I'm heading out to ransack all the Day Spas within three states, and donate the profits to aspiring game store owners.
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[quote=Daeica]Good one Sage, but if you're going to do an intro like that again, please make it to the point. After the first 10 times you said C'mon repeatedly after one another, I have to admit I started twitching abit. So yeah, basically more to the point I suppose, and don't repeat yourself so much.[/quote]
I have to agree with this... this part really grated on my nerves as well. I don't know... maybe I'm just missing some sort of reference (I did notice that Monty Python fan statement, but still...)
However, the review itself was still informative and interesting!
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Great review and I liked the opening because it brought some variation to your reviews and I'm really sorry to what happened there. If you are really disappointed with the horror games this past 2 years than I recommend you play CRYOSTASIS. That game will scare the crap out of you and it's full of disturbing imagery. From being presented from a first person point of view of a cow before it gets it head chopped off, to seeing apparitions of ghosts freezing to death, seeing the room freezing in seconds or the fucking EARTH in a web of ice. Damn that game takes psychological horror to a new level and I heartily recommend it to any FPS/horror/ good plot with symbolism fan.
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07.23.2009 - 22:29 | CubeI've only played Condemned 2. I was shocked when you said the combat was improved. I would describe it as "horribly broken and a massive chore". Actually, that's how I would describe the whole game.
The only good part of the game was the police station level, and the forensics were pretty good. Apart from that, I hated it from start to finish.
Although I couldn't stop laughing when I unlocked the scream attack ability. IT seemed utterly stupid and out of place.
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07.23.2009 - 22:39 | Brandon the Bold
There are few finer things than getting a professional massage at a spa, Bennett. Don't knock it til you've tried it. :P
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07.23.2009 - 22:40 | Guru Larry
How far is that store from your house in reality? :D
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07.23.2009 - 22:41 | Noll_UK
I was going to the mention the whole monty python bit, but you commented on it within the video, BRAVO!
I still cant get over the fact of how much you Americans love Python :D
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07.23.2009 - 23:09 | theturdwhispererthis game was good :(
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I thought you said 'gay spa' at the beginning of the video ;)
Nevertheless it's a shame cool place get turned into shitholes.
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Great use of Gilmour's solo from the beginning of "Shine On You Crazy Diamond". I haven't heard this piece in a while now I can see that any 'nostalgic' video can be accompanied by this.
Cheers!
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07.23.2009 - 23:32 | Fyodoror
The music in this one was awesome! Yes the review was great too, but the music set the mood and blew my mind!
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I'm, having a twilight zone moment. I've BEEN to that store, Sage. It's litterally THREE BLOCKS from my house!
Whoh...
And to prove it, right across the street, that store is The Bikepeddler. Were my family buys our bikes from.
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07.24.2009 - 00:04 | -Majin-
Urgh, i played it too, and as much as i loved the beginning, the ending is a cluster of plot-holes and bad si-fi(like yahtzee said it, it looks like the combine got drunk and build a tower)
And your complaint about the darkness is spot-on, not only is it WAY to dark sometimes, but the camera also gets out of focus, and everything gets blurry.
And i could not stop laughing at the final boss fight...it was so strange that the game shifted from a sick hobo slaughter fest into a dragon ball Z power struggle...with screaming.
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07.24.2009 - 00:09 | miggelsson
i tried the demo but didnt like it, condemned 1 was amazing though
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07.24.2009 - 00:25 | Leifonuss
cool review and hey, i recently played rayman 2 on dreamcast and there's music playing in the swamp level that sounds like the pink floyd song you used in the video!
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07.24.2009 - 02:10 | Shinigami
Actually no, its not thought that counts when it comes to video games.
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[quote=mirekmajka]I thought you said 'gay spa' at the beginning of the video ;)
Nevertheless it's a shame cool place get turned into shitholes.[/quote]
Same here^^
Great review!
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07.24.2009 - 04:23 | pharmmajor
Damn, I'm sorry to hear about the game shop being forced to file for bankruptcy. Wasn't the owner insured against theft?
BTW, I'm amazed at the restraint you showed in avoiding a Chester A. Bum imitation while fighting the hobos.
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07.24.2009 - 05:57 | Bennett the Sage
Well, when I made this back in May of 2008, the Bum didn't exist, so its kinda hard to do an imitation.
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[quote=Bennett the Sage]Well, when I made this back in May of 2008, the Bum didn't exist, so its kinda hard to do an imitation.[/quote]
Oh; didn't know this was an old vid. Sorry.
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07.24.2009 - 04:28 | GraylordYou said that scoring on the investigation part brought essentially nothing. But that is not true. You unlock upgrades for your character, like a punching daggers that makes the enemies stagger more, or a flak vest that makes you take less damage.
I have the 360 version where the online is in use, however, it is pretty much what you can expect. It's exactly like fighting bums, but you have health like one yourself. You can however hide in dark places etc and take them by surprise, but it doesn't really work.
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[quote=Guru Larry]How far is that store from your house in reality? :D[/quote]
It's about...a mile or two I wanna say.
Or just over 3 Kilometers for you metric folk.
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07.24.2009 - 06:09 | Gothkitty92Love the Monty Python spoof in the beginning. And I must say, I'm not really a horror beat-em-up game kinda person, but this does look fun.
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07.24.2009 - 06:12 | Mister Fiend
I think of this as a Highlander 2 type sequel, retconning the original out of relevance. I'm surprised you didn't mention the whole "having to be drunk to keep your hands steady enough to shoot straight" aspect. And I agree, if it's these sonic emitters making people crazy, why the fuck am I fighting a mech all of a sudden? And if the cops know where the evil magician is, why haven't they gone and arrested him already?
...and the evil clown chick at the end of the dollhouse is...kinda hot...
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07.24.2009 - 06:14 | Goodparley
Nice analysis of the dollhouse level.
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07.24.2009 - 06:44 | savoryFucking gay spa, LOL.
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