Dracula: Sovereign of the Damned (with Linkara!)
Written by Bennett The Sage Sunday, 15 January 2012 00:58
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01.15.2012 - 02:14 | Keiji
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01.15.2012 - 05:58 | Hentai Slayer
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01.15.2012 - 09:21 | Dorian6
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01.15.2012 - 08:51 | ultramanmattia
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01.15.2012 - 18:46 | ladydiskette
I have to admit for a movie with crappy anime-style animation in it they did a pretty descent job with thier illustrative interpretation of Vlad the Impaler.
Oh wow, this movie was bad....at least "Vampire Wars" was coherent to sit through. This was just painful. And I doubt if giving the three human characters more scenes would have probably made the movie any better. But that whole thing with the guy being a descendent of Dracula before he was a vampire and then never dealing with it or bringing it up has got to be one of the stupidiest plotholes I have ever seen in a anime in my life!
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The back story given by Dracula is more Accurate than you give credit. Yes, he impaled people, but his methods were widespread during his time. Many rulers used similar, if not harsher methods. The only reason he is remembered as a monster is because an account by German Monks vilified him.
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01.15.2012 - 03:02 | Zax
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And he was a benevolent ruler. But not of Transilvania... In fact, he ruled the land to the south of the Carpathian mountains, known then as the Principate (the part of the country where Bucharest is found).
His rule was segmented into 3 periods, intertwined with periods of incarceration. He was hated by surrounding nations that wanted to conquer The Principate, especially the Turks, to whom he refused to pay taxes, and he impaled mostly spies and traitors, not random people or soldiers, or just for funziez. After his lengthy second incarceration (around 12 years if I remember correctly) the ruler of Moldavia, Stefan the Great, used his political influence to have him released, and he had a brief third rule, being shortly thereafter assassinated by agents of the Turkish Empire, decapitated, his head taken to Constantinople where the sultan impaled it on a spear, as proof of his victory over Vlad.
He was indeed a kind ruler, especially when compared to his father, Vlad Dracul, who was a ruthless tyrant, demanding ridiculous taxes and living in decadent luxury.
He was also a Magnificent Bastard Strategist, almost killing the Sultan on one occasion, prompting a hasty and shameful retreat of the Turkish forces, which is why the Sultan hated him with a passion.
5/5 star review for me, and I just loved how you two interact. More people should watch your reviews Sage, not just for cameos, but because they are crazy disturbed awesome!
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01.15.2012 - 13:04 | Basilisk1991
Last I checked, didn't Vlad rule Wallachia, also last I had checked he was actually spent a good chunk of his childhood as an political prisoner of the Ottomans, where he was pretty much beaten and possibly sodomized regularly(Which might have been a exxageration until you actually learn his method of impalement, than it makes sense), which explains his hatred of the Ottomans.
I think the mean reason people thought he was sadistic was due to the sheer amount of people he has impaled, and not JUST prisoners of war but criminals as well, nothing says "GET THE F**K OFF MY LAWN!" like forest of impaled corpses lined up along the edges
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01.15.2012 - 15:00 | TheIrrehensibleTJ
True that. Also it's interesting how many stories of Vlad got mixed up with those of his father, who was the one in the Order of the Dragon.
Like the bleeding cross. One time, he stabbed a cross with he's sword and it bled. Actually, the sword was just covered in blood from a battle, but why he stabbed it into a cross in the first place is anyone's guess, really.
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09.15.2012 - 20:35 | CasandraelfAeriegrin, Zax, [insertnamehere], Basilisk, TJ, thank you! that bugged the shit out of me when i first watched this!
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02.04.2012 - 22:58 | Kryss LaBrynWell, according to one account I read (in "The Search for Dracula" iirc), one of his jailors noted that he couldn't seem to stop his "bad habits" even in captivity, and had birds brought to him for him to impale. Not to mention that whole thing about not only impaling women (by the obvious entry point), but also impaling their babies to their breasts, so whatever the cause of it, it certainly wasn't just something he did to enemy soldiers to scare them away.
He impaled a doctor for complaining (in a humourous manner in an attempt to not offend) about the rotting corpses near their table one dinner; he put him on a higher spike "so the smell wouldn't bother him." He had a man's wife killed because the guy was wandering about in a torn shirt and his wife wasn't sick or injured and unable to sew; she was therefore lazy. The guy protested but Vlad killed her and gave him a new wife who no doubt was inspired to be extremely industrious. The stories go on and on and on. He was a good fighter, and he certainly kept law and order of a kind, but he was also a brutal and capracious ruler.
One story I do like, though, is the story of the merchant who lost a bag of gold as he was riding along. He put out word and it was returned by a peasant who had found it (and just the fact that the poor man did return it instead of hanging onto it shows you the penalties if he was found out). However, when the merchant counted the coins, he said one was missing. "You stole a coin!" he accused. The peasant denied any such thing (he doubtless would have suffered a horrible death if he had taken any of it) and insisted they take the matter before the ruler.
"How many coins were in the bag you lost?" asked Dracula.
"A hundred," the merchant replied (as I pull a number out of my ass; it was a damned good amount, though, and in gold).
"And how many were in the bag the man brought to you?"
"Ninety-nine."
"Did you take a coin?" asks Dracula of the peasant.
"No, sir!"
"Very well then. This bag," he tells the merchant, "Is obviously not yours, since it doesn't have the right amount of money in it." So Dracula takes the entire bag away from the merchant (who, it was heavily insinuated, had made up the story of the missing coin in an attempt to get another one reimbursed to him) and gives it to the peasant. However, the peasant isn't allowed to touch any of it; he is to guard it until the "correct owner" shows up.
Which is kind of hilarious. I'm sure that as soon as Dracula was killed, though, the family went nuts with it. I certainly would have!
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01.16.2012 - 01:05 | Vismutti
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01.31.2012 - 18:45 | Specter Von Baren
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01.15.2012 - 09:30 | raknai
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01.15.2012 - 14:57 | TheIrrehensibleTJ
Actually, on that note, Napoleon stood 5' 7", which wouldn't really be exceedingly short even today.
The whole "short" thing actually originated in a series of political cartoons in England meant to belittle their foe, most famous of which includes Napoleon being small enough to fit in King George's hand.
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02.04.2012 - 22:44 | Kryss LaBrynAlso a difference at the time between what the French and English both called "a foot". 5'7 in modern feet is actually a pretty good height for his day, and was about the same height as Wellington.
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01.15.2012 - 03:24 | BooRat
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01.20.2012 - 08:27 | Dragon_NexusThank god someone came in here with this.
I didn't ragegasm at the apparent pussification of Dracula (What, he was a nice guy? OMG RAGE!)
I ragegasm'd at the utter lack of research done by either of the two reviewers.
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01.15.2012 - 02:32 | The_Awesometeer
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01.15.2012 - 02:49 | Gundam4ever
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01.15.2012 - 02:48 | ClintonIf I were to see Sage laughing at my doorstep, my reaction would probably be the same as Spoony's.
Wondering how true to the original comic this anime is.
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01.15.2012 - 11:38 | Snukastyle
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01.15.2012 - 20:34 | brick mooncode
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In defense of Akira, there is one major notable difference between adapting the 70 issues "Tomb of Dracula" to an anime movie, and adapting Katsuhiro Otomo's epic manga into an anime movie.
That difference is that Katsuhiro Otomo also DIRECTED the anime movie.
This means that he personally picked and chose what elements to keep, what elements to exclude, and which elements to change for the anime film adaptation. And since he wrote and drew the original comic, that means fans can shut the hell up if they complain about differences between the two. They can't blame the studio, the producer, or the animation company for any nitpicks they might have. And if they blame the director, he can be all "Bitch, I WROTE THE DAMN BOOK! I do what I want!"
And the result was a DAMN good movie! It was a technical marvel that wowed audiences, and was a film that helped introduce the West to the very concept of anime in the 80's, which would become a cascading effect that led to the start of various anime translating companies like ADV, Central Park Media, Manga Entertainment, and Animeigo. (Viz Video was unique because it was backed from the very beginning by Japanese publishing giant Shogakukan, Inc.) And YES, I am aware that anime's introduction to the West goes further back to the 60's, but I'm talking about the 80's Boom.
In THIS case however, Tomb of Dracula is what I believe to be an unfortunate bi-product of said 80's Boom. Primary writer for Tomb of Dracula: Marv Wolfman, was probably NOT involved in the production of this film, leaving it to people likely unfamiliar with the comic to create the flick.
And thus, THIS was made.
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01.15.2012 - 02:52 | ElderGodBrandoni have been wanting to see you review diatron for a while now lol since its always in the background of yoru videos, also try to review Macron 1 if you can find it
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01.15.2012 - 02:59 | Kaiju-Z
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01.15.2012 - 05:32 | Archane
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01.15.2012 - 03:07 | Shinigami
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01.15.2012 - 03:23 | BooRat
Awesome this was a perfect crossover! Even though I was hoping Linkara would've talked more on the Marvel comic that this anime was based on, but still ceeewwl!
I actually looked this up and watched the 1st half of it on YouTube after Sage's 1st announcement and only made it threw the 1st half! Up to the Baby Death scene and a little after! I'm guessing the version I watched was screwed up more or ya'll left something out as after Dracula runs off when his kid died it showed the classic mislead of a guy and a girl making out in a car and you're lead to believe he or possibly some one off screen is a Vampire and it turns out it's the girl and she feeds on him! Was that in here and ya'll skipped it or did the bootleg I half-assed watch get mixed in with something else?!
The story to this anime was good (probably because it was based on Tomb of Dracula), but the rushed nature of this made it un-fallow-able! There's also a Frankenstein one too you should do! Saw it on YouTube too! :P
What was that anime that Sage assaulted Spoony with!? I was hoping for MDGiest, but whatever! XP
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01.15.2012 - 03:37 | Supermutant2099
One of the worst anime ever. Just a horrible abomination to it's source material. I mean comic and book. It's fun to laugh at with other people but really dumb. I have had a lot experience with it during Bad Anime Bad panels at anime next convention here in new jersey. I think it was number 2 on his top ten worst anime he shown during the panels 10 years. This and Frankenstein. What was toei and marvel thinking? Not Just Rest In Peaee but how Janus. The way that spelled. Take j off you anus.
Fun crossover as always. Been looking forward to this since sage mention at the end of the last one.
This movie is on youtube and I can say why never taken down. If I was toei or Harmony gold people I wouldn't want to admit I did this. I say this is why this and Joesph Lai stuff can be easily found on youtube.
Fun drinking game with this movie: Take a drink everytime a character eye get sparkle.
Also, oh Boston. Well how Patriots and Red Sox cheat they way to championship and get away with it. No wonder they don't mind Dracula walking around. :) Sorry I am from New Jersey and well being Giants/Jets/Yankess fan.
I should have seen the spoony thing coming since sage already showed up in one of his videos I saw on blip. Diatrons? hm. Well if spoony thought he could avoid by not going to magfest then sage comes to him. "_
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01.15.2012 - 10:58 | Semudara
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01.15.2012 - 16:17 | ZigTheHunter
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01.15.2012 - 13:23 | Doresh
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01.15.2012 - 03:56 | TheyCallMeTheSwedeI knew when you appear on Spoony's Counter Monkey, I knew something was up...and it wasn't the Manure Goblin.
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Ehhh, not this stuff again.
Vlad wasn't a bloodthirsty mindless murderer as the propaganda spread by the western merchants he quarreled with would imply.
He used impaling as a punishment for murder, treason, robbing barons and thievery because it was the most horrific thing imaginable at the time. The result was probably the largest dropoff in crime in known history. Normal everyday people didn't fear him, because he made their lives safer. But then he went and got in arguments with western european merchants from which he requested equal rights for local merchants, going as far as stopping their shipments coming from the Orient until they granted those rights.
They in turn made a fake allegiance letter from Vlad to the Sultan, delivered it to Corvin, who had him jailed when he retreated to Transylvania after a lost battle with the Otoman Empire. He was later released, but spending time in a medieval dungeon tends to be murder on your health.
Other than that, good review.
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01.15.2012 - 04:27 | leviadragon99
Well to be fair, given that he's relaying that story of his past to the woman he supposedly loves, it would make sense for him to paint himself in a positive light, thus the old "unreliable narrator" trope comes up and the movie is marginally cleverer in that one instance than you give it credit for.
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I saw this with the Greek dub years ago and it sounded a lot better, because a lot more effort was put into the whole process. And the Video store that had that version has apparently closed and I can't find the copy anymore.
And the biggest problem with this was simply the attempt to compress so many issues into one cheap animated movie, had it been given more movies and a better animation studio it would have been a much better project since it was based on a great comic.
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01.15.2012 - 04:35 | puma_dace2000Aaa really guys research a little more about this... well actually there's no way you could. But anyway the story of Dracula in this piece of garbage is surprisingly accurate. Yes he did impale people but only people who where either criminals or beggars. And yes he did also use macabre ways of scaring his enemies such as evacuating an entire village burning it to the ground and leaving dead mutilated heads of his enemies in the ruins to scare the enemies. In a way he was actually brilliant. His biggest mistake that lead to his undoing was that he was a Templar, and Templars weren't allowed to do such things and so he was sentenced to death.
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01.15.2012 - 13:35 | dennett316
Yes, because beggers deserve to have spikes driven through them.
I get what you, and others above, are saying, but by any standard he was still a vicious fucker. That others were possibly as vicious, or that the victims of his impalements were criminals is neither here nor there...was no-one mistakenly labelled a criminal in those days? Numerous despots and dictators are loved by those who have been bred to love their ways or risk death....doesn't make the claims against them any less valid or disgusting in the eyes of others.
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02.04.2012 - 23:20 | Kryss LaBrynYes. As an example he solved the homeless problem in one city by giving all the beggars they could find a magnificent feast and promising he'd end all their problems. His men took the beggars to a large barn where the feast was laid out, locked them in, and burned it to the ground. When people protested, he replied in surprise that he had done exactly as he had promised: Not one beggar had any problems anymore.
He's a fascinating character and did reward those who served him well generously; but he was also a vicious and apparently pathological killer. He built a lot of churches in an apparent attempt to buy his way into Heaven, but as a monk (or priest? Don't remember offhand; the story was in the book "In Search of Dracula" iirc) told him when commanded to speak freely without punishment on the subject said, nothing he could do could make up for the horrors he had perpetrated. BTW, the monk, who gave him a real chewing out, irritated Dracula enough that he had him killed anyways, despite having given his word that he wouldn't, which is very irritated indeed, because he was usually pretty good about keeping his word (if only to the letter and twisted to go the way he wanted).
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01.15.2012 - 04:55 | Unreal_BE
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01.15.2012 - 04:57 | WiX2
Insertnamhere gave a pretty good description of the historical realities ignored by the makers of this movie... and western european eyes in general. As a romanian, I say fuck you to the movie for this -im not a tepes fan, but at least open 1 history book before inserting cruelty and barbarians into this-.
As a movie fan: I WANT TO SEE THIS!
Great review, albeit the movie made it easy for you guys :)
Keep it up Sage.
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01.15.2012 - 05:24 | Cross X. Brand
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01.15.2012 - 06:31 | LikaLaruku
Think about it Dracula; statistically, the romance dies after the first year of marriage. You really want to be with the same woman all eternity? Saddled with hundreds of kids, two jobs, & no time to see your friends?
6 thumbs up for that Inspector Gadget joke. Wowzers! XD
Lol, great use of a Team America clip.
I prefer the scenario where the guy says "The cross? Why doesn't it work?" & the vampire is like "Because I'm not a christian."
So uh Sage, this plot reminding you of Fanfiction Theater?
Don't fuck with the Frankenburger.
Hurrayz! I loves me some more crossovers. Speaking of which...Where the hell have Welshy, Barghav, & Sean run off to?
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02.04.2012 - 23:25 | Kryss LaBryn"Think about it Dracula; statistically, the romance dies after the first year of marriage. You really want to be with the same woman all eternity?"
Haha, I was thinking the same thing. XD Sure, he's in love with her NOW... XD
Not saying that marriage is bad or there's no point because you'll inevitably grow to hate each other or anything (am married myself); but yeah. All of eternity (or at least probably the next several hundred years) in the same monogamous relationship? Well, it could work in theory, I suppose...
How the hell did Dracula sire a son anyways? Vampires are known for BEING SEXY, not for HAVING SEX. Buffy and Twilight aside. Usually they're considered to be sterile if they have sex at all, their only means of procreation being by making other vampires.
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01.15.2012 - 05:45 | LegodzillaFan
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01.15.2012 - 06:33 | LikaLaruku
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01.17.2012 - 21:30 | Reliena
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01.15.2012 - 05:49 | YeahwhateverGreat video...
BY THE WAY. Just a heads up... Instead of constantly crediting "Ren & Stimpy" in all these videos that feature that vintage needledrop music, you might want to instead credit "Associated Music Productions" and "Capitol Music Publishing" libraries for them. Becuase that is where they come from, and where cartoons like Spongebob and R&S licence them.
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Somebody did actually try and make a movie of that series... And they did fail? Well... no S*** Sherlock :P
I think I have some copies of the original comic at home and it is a pretty okay comic if you ask me, but as you guys did say... trying to get ALL the information and plots from a 70 issue comic down to 90 minutes.. You are going to fail ^_^
Really good review and it is always fun to see a mix like this of two or more reviewers.
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02.04.2012 - 23:26 | Kryss LaBrynNo, no, it totally works! See, you have one minute to cover the events of each comic... XD
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01.15.2012 - 06:26 | jalford
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01.15.2012 - 06:54 | blackmaniacI laughed my ass off. The intro narration is so cheesy, I just couldn't keep myself from laughing out loud.
I look forward to you tormenting spoony with another shit anime from korea. Great ending
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01.15.2012 - 08:44 | LighticeWell, Vlad the Impaler was actually pretty loved in his home country, and is considered a national hero to this day. It was the foreigners who were pretty horrified by him. He was popular for keeping the aristocracy at arms length and protecting the rights of the common people, and ofcourse for keeping the Ottoman invaders at bay. He could be cruel as hell to his enemies, but he didn't really do anything worse than it was standard in his time - pretty bad as it was.
Also, I've seen Dracula in McDonalds, as well as various elves, fantasy creatures and anime characters. That's just something that happens when there's a convention nearby.
Not that this movie isn't stupid beyond all belief. Some wierd things just actually make sense in real life - more so than in this flick.
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01.16.2012 - 01:12 | Vismutti
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01.16.2012 - 07:27 | ThatPersonintheSweater@ Lightice Stalin and Mao are loved in their own countries, too, but that doesn't absolve them of their crimes
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02.04.2012 - 23:30 | Kryss LaBryn"Also, I've seen Dracula in McDonalds, as well as various elves, fantasy creatures and anime characters. That's just something that happens when there's a convention nearby. "
Haha, I was gonna say. Although (well, twenty years ago, anyways) when I've gone much further than the hotel lobby in costume I still got sideways looks from people, even on Hallowe'en. Mind you, maybe it depends on what you're dressed as. XD (One of my fave con memories was darting out as a Klingon to a nearby mall for more film-- yeah, it was a while ago-- and having an entire escalator of Japanese tourists start snapping my picture. That was pretty cool. XD)
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01.15.2012 - 09:44 | CronoT