Films Yanks Can't Wank: Apaches

(126 votes, average 4.92 out of 5)

Guru Larry's Review: Apaches



To accompany Guru Larry's review of Apaches, We thought due to this film being public domain and an absolute bitch to get a hold of (mainly as it was never released on VHS, Betamax or DVD) we would present it to you in it's entireity. This is the original 1977 unedit version of the movie, later versions had the blood scenes removed. Enjoy!
Comments (162)
  • Guru Larry
    avatar
    [color=red][i][b]Awesome, thanks for putting up the full film guys, It was a nightmare getting hold of the original unedited version, this is actually ripped from 16mm cinereel!

    I just thought it'd be a nice change on TGWTG for you to see the whole movie for yourself, let you judge my criticisms :D[/b][/i][/color]
  • Shrimppuff
    i couldn't understand a single word you or anyone else said whatsoever. you need subtitles or something.
  • uberjoe19
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    If you watch more British shows and talk to British people, you pick up on the accents and they cease being difficult to understand.
  • Zouri
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    Between this and Noseybonk, it is a wonder British kids can even sleep at night!
  • Guru Larry  - re:
    avatar
    [quote=Zouri]Between this and Noseybonk, it is a wonder British kids can even sleep at night![/quote]

    [i][color=red][b]Well it's the reason why most of them turn out to be Evil James Bond-esque villains :D[/b][/color][/i]
  • Citizen Snips
    avatar
    I like this new series. I believe you mentioned on Spoony's site that it was alot of work so I'd understand if you dont make many of these videos, but I myself would like to see more. My initial reaction was culture shock at seeing this, though I suppose the US has some pretty messed up and/or goofy PSA's ourselves ranging from drugs to what to do in a nuclear blast.
  • Guru Larry  - re:
    avatar
    [quote=Citizen Snips]I like this new series. I believe you mentioned on Spoony's site that it was alot of work so I'd understand if you dont make many of these videos, but I myself would like to see more. My initial reaction was culture shock at seeing this, though I suppose the US has some pretty messed up and/or goofy PSA's ourselves ranging from drugs to what to do in a nuclear blast. [/quote]

    [color=red][i][b]Thanks bud :D

    Well it was more work than normal as I was setting up an introduction to British PSAs. I will definitely be doing more, but I don't think I can manage something weekly, Plus I think not making them too regularly will make them feel more special.[/b][/i][/color]
  • Yggdrasil
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    Saw this on the Spoony experiment, I really enjoyed it. I hope to see much more, I am becoming a big fan.
    Well done and keep it up. =D
  • Chris P Bacon
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    Who knew playing Apaches on a British farm was so dangerous, 87% death rate or so. When I was growing up as an Apache we used to play British farmer all the time and only 22% of us died from it directly.
  • Deimos1984rd
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    [color=green]I really enjoyed the riff of this...err..uh "PSA" I couldn't stop laughing, thanks Larry, that made my day. You'd think there would be parents supervising them but oh well.[/color]
  • whatever42
    avatar
    Why Deimos, that's just silly. Obviously, adults in that world do not care at all. Think about it. The other kids don't really react to the other kids dying. It is just such a regular occurence for them that they don't even notice it anymore. The farmers were obviously thinking, "Well, they might die, but it's going to happen anyway." Even the people at that wake at the end didn't really look that broken up.

    Anyway, I can see some potential in this series and I like this episode for sure. Those vaugely defined deaths really annoyed me, that one with the gate especially. Also, I don't think I've ever seen such stupid children.

    Nice job Larry. Hope to see more. =)
  • Guru Larry  - re:
    avatar
    [quote=Yggdrasil]Saw this on the Spoony experiment, I really enjoyed it. I hope to see much more, I am becoming a big fan.
    Well done and keep it up. =D [/quote]
    [color=red][i][b]
    Thanks bud!

    Yeah, I thought it was time I up my game on TGWTG and not just flounder on uploading old shit =D [/b][/i][/color]
  • jacktchance
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    Saw this on Spoony's site and LordKat's cameo is awesome. Hope to see more in the future, SAE.
  • GLKnight
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    Are you going to cover "When the Wind Blows"? That one was pretty stark to watch.
  • NowCompleteWith  - Larry,
    avatar
    this is a brilliant. Seriously, the film is ridiculous, it's mind-blowing that the English children had to sit through this nonsense, and your take on it all had me laughing my ass off. Good stuff man. Very good stuff.
  • Guru Larry  - re:
    avatar
    [quote=GLKnight]Are you going to cover "When the Wind Blows"? That one was pretty stark to watch.[/quote]
    [color=red][i]
    [b]I was planning that for my "Britanimation" series, but FYCW sort of got in it's place mainly as I kept finding live action stuff.

    But that is definitely on the cards yeah.[/b][/i][/color]
  • Guru Larry  - re: Larry,
    avatar
    [quote=NowCompleteWith] this is a brilliant. Seriously, the film is ridiculous, it's mind-blowing that the English children had to sit through this nonsense, and your take on it all had me laughing my ass off. Good stuff man. Very good stuff.[/quote]
    [color=red][i][b]
    Excellent, Thought I'd do something good for once, we got accused of not being funny on our Top Tens, but that was really as we were restrained by management on TV.

    But I'm really pleased you like it!!![/b][/i][/color]
  • Draiman
    avatar
    I remember a PSA like this when I was in middle school, my school was near train tracks we got a PSA about why not to walk on or play near train tracks, and yes a bunch of kids died in it.
  • benzaie
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    this is awesome larry :love:
  • SpotTheShingo
    I enjoy your latest venture, Larry. Keep it up!

    And always remember, as the the (3rd) Doctor said, "Splink!"
  • PublicEnemy
    avatar
    Loved the Use of Sugarhill Gang's "Apache" at the end of the song =D

    Great review, amazing the lengths the british went to scare there children hahah
  • Kai Leingod
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    in truth this was the beginning instead of scarring kids they decided to scare parents and it worked
  • Guru Larry  - re:
    avatar
    [quote=benzaie]this is awesome larry :love: [/quote]

    [color=red][i][b]Cheers Bennie![/b][/i][/color]
  • Guru Larry  - re:
    avatar
    [quote=SpotTheShingo]I enjoy your latest venture, Larry. Keep it up!

    And always remember, as the the (3rd) Doctor said, "Splink!"[/quote]
    [color=red][i]
    [b]cheers, I thought i'd try something non-gaming for once.[/b][/i][/color]
  • pap64
    avatar
    Am I the only one getting a "Final Destination" vibe from watching this PSA? It's a lot like that movie except there's no premonition at the beginning, the deaths aren't elaborate traps and the kids and adults are too stupid to realize what is going on or even take action.

    This is a very interesting concept for an internet show, Larry! It should be fun to see what obscurity you bring us next!

    And pardon me for being off-topic, but are those King of Fighters figurines you have on your shelf? I recognize Athena Asamiya, but don't know who the other two are.
  • Furore23
    avatar
    Thank you very much, Mr Larry - or may I call you Guru?

    That was remarkably interesting! Time for linky:
    http://tvtropes.org/ pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ BetterThanItSounds

    I'm a bit curious about two minor things.
    1. You credit BRIAN BLESSED!!!!! in your 'Special Thanks'. May I enquire why that is?
    2. I'm a bit of a fan of English regional accents and dialects, but I don't actually know that much about them. If it's not too personal a question, can I ask where yours comes from? Are you a 'Brummie'? Are you a 'Geordie'? From where in the UK do you hail?

    Anyways. I totes enjoyed your little thing, as I have all your videogame posts. Carry on, good Sir!
  • Guru Larry  - re:
    avatar
    [quote=pap64]Am I the only one getting a "Final Destination" vibe from watching this PSA? It's a lot like that movie except there's no premonition at the beginning, the deaths aren't elaborate traps and the kids and adults are too stupid to realize what is going on or even take action.

    This is a very interesting concept for an internet show, Larry! It should be fun to see what obscurity you bring us next!

    And pardon me for being off-topic, but are those King of Fighters figurines you have on your shelf? I recognize Athena Asamiya, but don't know who the other two are.[/quote]
    [color=red][i]
    [b]Yeah Athena, Blue Mary and another one. Ashens got them got my birthday last year.

    But thanks, I just thought I'd so something similar to my Games Yanks Can't Wank series, so there's plenty of obscure stuff in the pipeline.

    I may do some obscure TV shows too.[/b][/i][/color]
  • pap64
    avatar
    Thanks for the reply, dude! It was a fun episode despite the morbid PSA :snicker:
  • Guru Larry  - re:
    avatar
    [quote=Furore23]Thank you very much, Mr Larry - or may I call you Guru?

    That was remarkably interesting! Time for linky:
    http://tvtropes.org/ pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ BetterThanItSounds

    I'm a bit curious about two minor things.
    1. You credit BRIAN BLESSED!!!!! in your 'Special Thanks'. May I enquire why that is?
    2. I'm a bit of a fan of English regional accents and dialects, but I don't actually know that much about them. If it's not too personal a question, can I ask where yours comes from? Are you a 'Brummie'? Are you a 'Geordie'? From where in the UK do you hail?

    Anyways. I totes enjoyed your little thing, as I have all your videogame posts. Carry on, good Sir![/quote]

    [color=red][i][b]Oh, no you're a TVtropes person, most of the stuff on there is about my thing with Chris-chan, and I put him in this video too. eep bad timing! :S

    As for your questions Sir:

    1> Brian Blessed, no not THE Brian Blessed, it's actually the username of a guy on Ashens forums who introduced me to this film a few years back. He also helped me out on something else...

    2> You can't get my accent? It's suburban London, more commonly known as the "BBC accent", though I have a bit of a cockney twang in there when I get angry or start shouting!

    But glad you liked it Sir![/b][/i][/color]
  • BS Digital Q
    Oh Larry you silly twat, you know its not Brian Blessed, its BRIAN BLESSSED!

    Seriously, the guy can even make snooker entertaining!
  • Guru Larry  - re:
    avatar
    [quote=PublicEnemy]Loved the Use of Sugarhill Gang's "Apache" at the end of the song =D

    Great review, amazing the lengths the british went to scare there children hahah[/quote]

    [color=red][i][b]Thanks bud! :D[/b][/i][/color]
  • Punky
    avatar
    I saw this thanx to Spoony and I just loved it! I can't believe they make this kind of movies to scare kids. Awesome Review for an awful movie :blush:
    Can't wait to see more!! *Thumbs up!*
  • adamthegrave
    avatar
    wtf does these British people thinking on this back in the day? lol this alot worst then don't get on a job videos I've seen

    plus everyone seems to ok when i kid dies the next day on this video if someone just take there stuff away that there dead lol

    plus funny video awesome lol
  • wootsman
    avatar
    sorry if this sounds shallow but best intro ever :meow:
  • Someguywhousesthiswebsite
    At first this movie was really disturbing, but when the kid got killed by the gate it just got stupid. Also, why do the kids keep playing as they watch their friends die?
  • Mamba
    avatar
    If I don't see Pipkins on this at some point Larry, I'll be disappointed. Loved it, brought back memories of when I played on farms.
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