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| Pouches and muscles like chunks of ham. Joy. |
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| geh... the 90s was not kind to the comics stereotype |
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| How many people saw this coming? |
Spoilers ahead.
Starting a new little project on this blog and going to try and watch every film released in 2011 (at least as listed on Wikipedia) and as luck would have it, I must begin with a Nicolas Cage film. Now normally I like to do a video review of Cage’s films but I’m having some technical issues in that department so I have to resort to something barbaric like typing out the words with my fingers rather than speaking them with my mouth parts. Enough of my problems, on to the review!
The film opens during the crusades which were apparently fought by quipping Americans who may or may not be trying to do English-esque accents. I honestly can’t tell if Nicolas Cage is trying speak with an English accent and just failing or if it’s just the way his voice goes when he’s trying to speak in somewhat faux Olde English. Ron Perlman, on the other hand, doesn’t even seem to bother and honestly, his performance is more enjoyable because of it. Anyway, the two Crusadery chums are hacking their way through battles, killing for God and drinking with wenches and just generally having as good a time as two knights can. After a while though, they come to the realisation that they aren’t just killing deserving infidel warriors but also women and children too. They decide that enough is enough and leave the Crusades and go on the run as deserters.
So they find themselves wandering around medieval Europe. What are they doing? Well, that’s never really explained. Probably going from village to village and righting wrongs where they can. That’s the ind of shit that righteous outlaws are always doing from Robin Hood to The A-Team. Anyway, they come across a kingdom blighted by the plague where they are recognised and arrested. However they are given a holy quest by a plague-ridden Christopher Lee (in one of the more bizarre cameo appearances in film history). The quest is to deliver an alleged witch to a monastery where a rite will be performed that will remove the curse of the plague. Cage is reticent to sign up and work for the church again but ultimately relents in exchange for a guarantee that the accused witch will receive a fair trial and that he and Perlman are given full pardons.
They are accompanied on their quest by a priest, the unfortunately named Debelzaq, a swindler/merchant named Hagamar, another knight whose own land has been ravaged by the plague, causing him to lose his daughter, named Ulrich and a young aspiring knight Kay. They set off and, honestly, not much actually happens on the way. There’s a few deaths and few things which are possibly meant to make you wonder if the girl actually has supernatural powers or not whilst actually makes it pretty fucking obvious that she has supernatural powers. What happens could best be described as dude gets stabbed, there’s a rickety bridge on which no one dies, some demon wolves and then bam. They’re at the monastery.
...After watching Nostalgia Chick's Top 10 Guilty Pleasures list, I felt the need to create one of my own. Here are my list of movies that I know are awful yet I feel placid by watching them for one reason or another.
10. Hackers (1995) - Johnny Lee Miller plays a young computer hacker on the run after being framed for creating a computer virus. But more notably, this is one of the earliest appearances of Angelina Jolie. Of course she looked a lot different back then than she does now. In fact, in this movie she looks like a boy (or a Vulcan, take your pick). Although the scene that stands out the most for me is a dream sequence by Miller’s character where he dreams Jolie comes into his bedroom, unzips her top and starts making out with him (typical teenage fantasy stuff). But I think what I enjoy about this the most is the movie’s interpretation of computer hackers and the counterculture of the time. I’ll catch it every now and then just to remind myself that Jolie was not the untouchable model we know her today, she was a kid just like the rest of us.
9. Wing Commander (1999) - The plot may be cheesy and the visuals may be ridiculous and the cats may be bald, but the chemistry between the cast is so rich and vibrant that I can’t stay mad at it. Freddy Prinze Jr. and Matthew Lillard work off of each other quite well and the side cast has a certain je no se quois to it. Although this is a war movie, it shows it doesn’t have to be all doom and gloom, there can be a happy ending too, which is quite refreshing.
8. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon (2000) - Okay, okay, I’m a sucker for Asian cinema. There, I said it, hate me if you must but I loved the fight scenes and it certainly skated on the edge of fantasy without going completely over the edge. Even though Chow Yun Fat and Michelle Yeoh are billed as the stars, their story feels more like a subplot to the starcrossed romance between the princess played by Zhang Ziyi (or Ziyi Zhang, nobody seems to be sure how to place her name) and the pirate played by Chen Chang. It certainly gets rather morbid at the end, but the fight scenes and set pieces are definitely worth it and is actually considered one of Ang Lee’s better work.
7. Stardust (2007) - The problem this movie had was that there was too much going on, too many ideas that don’t seem to fit. A star falls to Earth as a beautiful woman (Clair Danes) and is found by a farmhand named Tristan (Charlie Cox) who tries to take her back to woo the woman he loves only to fall in love with the star girl. Throw into the mix Michelle Pfeiffer as a vane witch, Robert DeNiro as a metrosexual pirate, a handful of ghosts with very unoriginal names, and Tristan’s mother who looks to be the same age as him. It is fantasy, pure unadulterated fantasy. And while having so many elements doesn’t work, they are elements I like as a fantasy fan. A true modern fairy tail if there ever was one.
...I've heard a lot of people complaining about remakes these days, and this year especially with the reboot of Spider-Man. Personally, The Amazing Spider-Man is one of my most anticipated movies of this summer. My philosophy is that there's no such thing as a bad idea, only a bad movie. And maybe it will be a bad movie, but that's no reason to bash it for existing. Just don't give it money!
But I digress. With the new Spider-Man movie coming out, and having just watched and reviewed Scream 4, I've started to wonder what other recent movies could actually work with a slight update. So here's a list of the top five movies from around ten years ago that could use remakes, reboots or at least some resurfacing.
5. Atlantis: The Lost Empire
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Fun Fact: This was a Joss Whedon project. Maybe that's why I don't like it, but I see the potential. With Disney trying bigger action movies like John Carter (okay, bad example), it'd be interesting to see them do a live-action remake of this film. But this time around maybe the villain's goal could be a little more understandable and less generic and mindless. You could still have some of the same characters in there, but it'd be nice to see what else they could come up with. Just make it a really cool family-friendly action-adventure with big special effects and a little bit more heart behind it.
...Hi! I'm Glenda and I'm 18 years old. I've been a fan of the site for about two years, but I've never really given into the fandom yet.
So here's a few facts about me (I sincerely apologize in advance if I sound conceited) :
- Five Contributors I Like: That Guy with the Glasses, TeamNChick, Todd in the Shadows, Oancitizen, and Paw.
- As cliche as this sounds, I cannot and will not live without music. My favorite bands/artists include the Dead Kennedys, Voltaire, The Doors, The Damned, Florence + the Machine, Patti Smith, Pogo, The Beatles, and Jimi Hendrix.
- A few movies I like: Ghost World, A Clockwork Orange, Pulp Fiction, Psycho, Kill Bill Vol. 1 and 2, Mary Poppins, the Harry Potter series.
...Today I will be reviewing the 1959, William Wyler film Ben-Hur.
Now I have never seen the movie the whole way through (which is no
surprise since this movie is nearly four hours long) but I have seen
bits and pieces of the movie, most notably the famous chariot race. But
seriously four hours? Do you know what else you can do in four hours?
Watch a ballgame, fly from Chicago to Los Angels, cook a turkey, or
watch Ben-Hur.
Now this movie is a great epic movie. All sorts of big events thrown
together for a great story but this movie is famous for one thing... the
chariot race.
This scene is exciting and for the time must have been extremely hard to
shoot. I am not an expert on the subject so I will just give my
ignorant non-founded facts and say that this scene had to shape action
scenes for years to come. The fact that it is still refereed to and
referenced shows how impactful this scene was. Also while watching this
scene it really made me wish NASCAR was this entertaining. One top of
this scene this film also won 11 Oscars for ...no way that is to many to
list, I will just say it won 11 Academy awards and nominated for one
more.
The wide world of world wide web has the following ratings:
IMDB = 8.2 out of 10
Rotten Tomatoes (Critic Rating) = 89%
Rotten Tomatoes (Audience Rating) = 81%
Really high critic rating and a little lower on the audience meters but
maybe 19% of people have better things to do then watch a four hour
movie.
Now time for my extremely un-expert opinion on the movie. The
characters we overall I don't know... nonexistent. Ben-Hur's sister and
mom were in the movie... and I can not tell you one characteristic
about them. The same would go for the character of Ester, Arrian, and
pretty much everone else in this movie. All characters can be defined
by are they a nice person or a mean eperson. Only a few characters
outside of Ben-Hur stood out to me. First being Jesus (does this then
count as a Christmas or Easter movie) because he is Jesus. Next the
Sheik who is just super entertaining. I really wish there was more of
him in this movie. Lastly there was Messala who only really stands out
due to his role in the story not due to great acting or being a stand
out character. Ben-Hur is a really enjoyable character and I found him
really funny though I am not sure if I was supposed to. The acting is
fine I didn't feel that it was horrible but nothing special either.
Here's another Stooge Overload article from my Passing Thoughts blog.
Technically speaking, anyway.
I remembered a few things about this movie, but I'd forgotten its one major flaw: that it's slow as hell for a Three Stooges movie.
...
This is a crosspost from my Passing Thoughts blog that I thought might do well here, also. What do you think, sirs?
Well, with the Farrelly Brothers' Three Stooges movie out and me considering seeing it, why not talk a bit about other Stooges movies I've seen and like?
...Here's my review in a nutshell: THIS MOVIE SUCKED!
And you know what scares the shit out of me? I'M IN THE MINORITY ON THIS!
I guess in order to understand why I think this movie sucked, you need to understand what frame of mind I'm in. So before I go into this review in detail, let me explain where I'm coming from.
I've been out of work for the better part of two years. I've only been gainfully employed for the past month. I have had no disposable income until this weekend. So I obviously haven't been to the movies in awhile. Also, I don't watch television (well, not on a TV, anyway), and I don't voluntarily watch movie trailers. I just don't. There are better things to waste my time with than commercials.
So if there was a hype machine for 21 Jump Street, I MISSED ALL OF IT. All I knew about the movie was that 1) It was based on a TV show I happen to like, and 2) Johnny Depp would be reprising his role from said TV show. And you know what? That was enough to sell me.
...It's time for another top list. This time around, Timdiana looks at the never ending issue in the world:Sequels. Find out which films made it in Timdiana's Top 10 Sequels.
Follow the Link:
http://blip.tv/timdiana-the-reviews/timdiana-the-reviews-top-10-movie-sequels-6029675
[Originally posted on http://obsessive-geek.blogspot.com]
Welcome once again to the series which I decide to give other people
ideas and act like I know what I'm doing! For this Make It So, I've
decided to focus on an Ultraman movie idea and hope that Tsuburaya
Productions and any American movie studio they partner with will listen.
So, here's the story in bullet point form:
Yeah, I know that it's an extremely basic outline that has been
utilized elsewhere in the franchise, but I'm sure with the proper script
, great actors and impressive enough fight scenes it can be pulled off.
As for actors I would suggest the following:
Try to get Chiwetel Ejiofor as the Ultra's human form. (Call him Dr. Daniel Drake)....
Oh yes, it's MY week this week! Yes guys, I made these 2 watch Chicago. It was...an interesting watch for all of us so...enjoy our reviews :)
Romances are very complex and often difficult to write. It's easy to write a romance, don't get me wrong. But writing a good romance? That can be near impossible, especially in these days when the majority's views on 'romance' differ so strongly from any previous ideals. In modern day, when Twilight is considered the epitome of romance to hordes of teenage girls who are soon to be women, I have to wonder how thatbecame the new ideal. I have made it quite clear in earlier works of mine that I detest Twilight. I don't use the word detest with any hyperbole; I honestly find myself sickened and concerned with my own age group when I think about the Twilight series. The 'romantic' element is the main reason for this.
Perhaps I'm too young to even give my viewpoint on this. I'm not even out of my teens yet, in fact. However, when I look at the way the media panders to my age group, it feels sometimes like I'm the only one who goes 'This is bullshit. Complete and utter bullshit.'
Remember how I said in my last Twilight rant that I was finished with complaining about it? Yeah, I lied. I'm going to have to use it as an example of how not to write a romance because it's the greatest example I can get from modern literature that is both popular and that I have actually read. With that little addendum out of the way, I shall begin. I'm writing this in list form since a) it's easier, and b) I read Cracked articles far too much.
How Not to Write a Great Romance
1.) Your characters are unlikable or boring.
Well, duh. Your characters have to be likable (or at least relatable) for your audience to latch onto your work. Characters who do nothing or value, say nothing of value, or are nothing but self-centered pricks who walk around with blinders on are rarely liked. Sadly, in recent years that type of character seems to have taken off. I blame it on the Mary Sue complex. Story-telling is fascinating because of the way audiences react to works. We all long to see ourselves reflected in the images we see presented before us. We long for it so much that we excuse a work for having a character who is, essentially, nothing but a blank slate to press ourselves onto.
It seems that authors these days are afraid to give their romantic leads any kind of flaws, for fear that the intended audience of the work won't be able to connect to those characters. Here's my view - if a character doesn't have any flaws (at least intentional ones) then I feel a complete disconnect from them. I'm a flawed person. You're a flawed person. We've all got issues. Why do the heroines or heroes we're supposed to connect with have absolutely nothing we can relate to on a personal level? Why would we pay money for an overly long self-insert fanfic when we could always read one of those online for free?
I'm not just talking about the biggest self-insert fic of them all, Twilight. I'm talking about the movies that are made to pander to a certain kind of audience. See any Meg Ryan romantic comedy, excluding When Harry Met Sally, and try and figure out why she is the lead when she is the dullest part of the story in nearly every case. Sure, her frumpy and neurotic demeanor may be relatable to some women, but her personality is usually lacking any kind of flair. She's the self-insert fic to the middle-aged bracket whereas Twilight is the self-insert fic to teenage girls.
Since this section is getting to be long, I should probably wrap it up with an example of some positive romantic leads in books and/or movies. Read any Nick Hornby novel. Yes, any Nick Hornby novel, especially High Fidelity. His characters are deeply flawed and sometimes hard to sympathize with, but watching them develop as the story progresses is one of the best parts of reading his works. They'll never wind up as 'perfect' characters, but they don't need to be. They are themselves - fascinating, selfish, stubborn, mercurial, and always growing.
2.) The romance completely overrides any semblance of plot.
Also known as a Romantic Plot Tumor. Writing romance as the main plot of your story can often end in disaster. This is related to the point I made at the start. Anyone can write a romance, but very few can write a good romance. If the romance between your leads is all your story has going for it, then it's going to be a very dull story. Not to say a romance can't be interesting. It's just that more events need to happen to really make your story take shape. If all the story will do is show us all the various ways the leads love one another, or why they can't be together, or all the angst they have because they can't be together - well, that's going to get old very fast. Stuffing a 400+ novel with only that will be downright torturous. The same goes for movies. Unless there's a real action and conflict to push the story forward, then the entire work will be stuck in a rut.
Some examples of this include: Grease, wherein the 'will they, or won't they' romance was the only plot that made any sense and stayed consistent, so it has to be considered the main story-line; and Twilight, obviously. There's no point in elaborating by this point on what a snore-fest of romantic self-gratification those books and films are.
If the romance is going to be the main focus of your story, then try to spice it up a little. Have the romance be a chance to look deeply into the psychology of the characters. Have them question themselves and look into their pasts. Even if the current plot of the story is nothing but a romance, their recollections might be something thrilling and can add greatly to character development.
A good example of a romance-centered story is The Dreamers. Okay, okay. I know it's a French art film, but hear me out. The characters are not only complex and interesting, but the dialogue is quick and provokes thought, there is action interspersed with everyday life and romantic/sexual encounters, and it makes the audience question morality and society in general. Even if you're turned off by what the film shows you, you can't deny that it's hard to look away and even harder not to think about. The thought-provoking questions the main romance invokes in its audience is what makes this film so memorable.
3.) The 'will they, or won't they' element doesn't make sense.
So you have two characters who are truly, madly, deeply in love with one another. They would cross miles, sail seas, and fight armies to be with their one true love. Therefore, having an obstacle in their way would make perfect sense and make the story more interesting, right?
Well, in most cases, yes. Having two lovers torn from each other by the cruelties of circumstance makes for an interesting plot, most of the time. However, you have to make certain that the 'will they, or won't they' principle actually works within your story. Considering that every romantic comedy ever made ever has used this principle, it's become rather difficult to discern when it works and when it doesn't. From my point of view, this sort of conflict needs to be hinged on something of worth; animosity between characters should not be the main reason they are torn apart/are denying their feelings, a la You've Got Mail.
This sort of conflict should really come from a much more complex reason, such as race issues, religious differences, cultural differences, feuding families/nations, or some sort of supernatural/beyond their control barrier keeping them apart. Psychological reasons for keeping characters apart can also be fascinating, as it's an inward instead of outward struggle and adds more weight to the plot; you wouldn't only be rooting for the romance to work, you would be rooting for one or both characters to find a healthier way to live and overcome their issues.
Sometimes 'will they, or won't they' works if the question isn't 'Will they get together?', but instead 'Will they have a happy ending?' Think Aimee and Jaguar, which has elements of both, and is also a deeply moving story without needing the romance to add further heartache.
4.) The romance is tacked on at the last minute.
Ginny Weasley, much? Okay, okay! Don't kill me. Let's be honest here, the Ginny/Harry subplot came right the fuck out of nowhere, at least in the movies. Since I haven't actually read all the books (shame, shame) I can only go by what I saw on film. One moment, Harry is crushing on a gorgeous Chinese-Scottish babe (who wouldn't?), and then the next moment Ginny is in the picture and Harry is macking on her like the last love interest never existed. And I'm left sitting there going, "Wait, what? What did I miss? Is my DVD broken? Who broke my DVD?! WAS IT THE RUSSIANS?!"
This usually doesn't happen in works intended to be romances. In most cases, this happens in a broader story, but the romance is still supposed to be an important factor. Now, I do enjoy Harry Potter, at least the movies; but I was so taken aback by the sudden romance that I lost a little love for the movies then and there. I understand the longing to inject romance into a story. People like romance, unless they're cynical (or pretending to be cynical so they don't have to admit they cried at Titanic. Twice).
Still, throwing in a romance nugget when the rest of the story was finely developed seems a little...lazy. If a story has a romance, it should be as well-rounded as the rest of the plot, or close enough that it doesn't stand out, even if the romance doesn't get as much attention or time to develop. I understand it's hard juggling various plotlines when you have a large number of characters you need to focus on. But keep in mind - if it's your main character and his/her romance seems out of the blue, your audience will notice.
5.) You don't follow through, or tease the audience.
Sex and romance often go hand in hand, wouldn't you say? Of course, there are always exceptions. I would actually love to see a love story between two asexual people, but that's probably too much to ask for. My point is, sexual compatibility is an important part of love and relationships. If you're not sexually compatible with your partner, there will always be a rut in the relationship. The same goes for characters. If there's no chemistry between them, no longing for each other that's tension-building and even sensual, then watching their 'romance' play out will be downright boring.
That's not to say a story needs sex. If the characters are young, I would suggest very strongly that you keep sexual tension down to a minimum (I'm looking at you, James Patterson). But sex is a natural part of any love story and shouldn't be shied away from, unless for some moral fears you have. Or unless you want your book or movie to be 'more widely marketable.'
I've seen a story that really should have a meaningful sex scene between characters completely glance over it. Sometimes a book will build up the sexual tension so much that I'm dying for the moment when the characters finally give in and let their desires take over; then, for no reason I can think of, it fades to black. I was lied to. I was teased! All that time I was hoping for a good resolution to the sexual tension built between the love interests, and all I get is a lousy "next morning scene." If your story already has profanity, drug use, and other adult themes...then why shy away from sexuality? It's nothing but a cop-out on the part of the writer and can be infuriating in some cases.
On the other hand...
6.) Porn, porn, porn...where'd my plot go?
Romance is not all about sex. Trust me, I like a good roll in the hay as much as the next hot-blooded individual, but I like cuddling just as well. Affection is not always shown in big, physical gestures. Sometimes a simple act of holding your partner at the right moment can bring an overwhelming feeling of love to your heart or his/hers. Characters need small moments like this to ground them in reality and make them sympathetic. If all they do is sleep with everything that moves, they become far less relatable. Smut is fine, of course. I've written some myself. However, pure smut makes for a poor novel. Don't base everything around sex, unless you want to alienate a large portion of your audience.
7.) Love triangles: the plight of the disposable love interest.
Have you ever read a book or watched a movie where the lead character has a love interest whose only role in the story is to be a small hurdle for the lead character to prevent he or she from getting together with his or her real true love?
Did your mind just flash with about a hundred different examples of this? That's because the character of the disposable love interest is so common in media that it's become cliche. Normally, the disposable love interest is a nice enough person; flawed, yes, but no more so than the protagonist. However, they just aren't perfect enough for the protagonist, who has apparently been gifted with a very high set of standards. A common trend these days is for the disposable love interest to let the protagonist be with his/her 'true love' because they only want happiness for the protagonist. This happens a lot in romantic comedies, such as You've Got Mail (though that was resolved a tiny bit better, if not lazily), Sleepless in Seattle (two disposable love interests in that case), and Sweet Home Alabama (I have yet to grasp why she would choose the other guy).
Then there's the direct opposite of the above, wherein the disposable love interest is a complete dickbag whom you know is going to get the boot by the end so the hero can 'rescue' his/her love interest from the disposable love interest's horrible grasp. This tends to happen in more male-driven sex comedies, such as Wedding Crashers, Revenge of the Nerds (which I liked, by the way), and Old School. It's the 'knight in shining armor' idea. The protagonist is anything but knightly, but his competition is such a bastard that the protagonist looks chivalrous in comparison.
I love when movies go against this cliche or put a spin on it. Check out movies like Wet Hot American Summer, The Road to El Dorado, or The Princess Bride. They have their own interesting way of twisting the expected, in some cases going against social norms to do this. Don't be afraid to do something new with a love triangle. Yes, sometimes you are presented with more than one option when it comes to love, but that doesn't mean it has to be a struggle like it is in the movies. And hey, I approve of menage a trois. Wouldn't that be a fun way to end a romantic comedy?
8.) Characters are together. Now what?
So you've finally wrapped up your big romance plot-line. Your characters are together, smooching it up big time and planning a wedding/party/orgy/whatever. The question is: what now? Clearly, if your entire story has been focused only on their romance, then a good ending can be hard to come by. Sometimes romance novels or movies peter out in an anti-climactic way because the writer(s) have no idea how to finish up the last bits of the story. Loose ends in the plot are left hanging. Questions are never answered. Your main goal was completed, so why should you bother with the rest of the plot?
Well, because your audience will be annoyed if you think story-telling is over just because everybody's getting laid (or getting paired up, however you want to look at it). Big, romantic endings tend to work considerably better in film because it's such a visual medium; a film audience will be far less likely to go "Wait, that's it?" if a film ends with the two leads kissing and it fading to black than if a novel tried to do the same.
It can be difficult to come up with a great ending once you have those romantic loose ends tied up. The two most common forms of ending a romance novel I've seen are with an epilogue, showing where the characters are now and how the romance has developed, or with dialogue between the romantic leads (sometimes with more characters involved). Both these ways can work quite well and can even be a heartwarming note to end the story on. In fact, I prefer these methods over one that has become more painfully common: the self-centered inner monologue of the hero or heroine.
Usually these inner monologues will be something along the lines of "I finally know what I want", "I won at the end", or "he/she is mine." I find this highly irritating, as it makes the love interest of the story into nothing more than a prize to be won, instead of a character in their own right. It makes the romance seem unequal and selfish on the part of the character speaking. Which brings me to my next point...
9.) The romance is unequal/selfish.
As stated above, I hate when a love interest is seen as nothing more than a prize to be won. This is why unexpected romances tend to warm my heart a little more because it's less about one or the other person trying to 'win' the other, but about how you can't really help who you fall for. There are so many examples of love interests treated as objects that listing them all would add a thousand more words to this already lengthy document. I point my finger of shame at Twilight, especially; I'm still amazed at how utterly selfish and possessive both leads come off as, though maybe that means they really are 'meant for each other.'
If a character has to beg for love, then what the hell kind of romance is that? The answer is that it isn't romance at all, it's a childish obsession. It's possessiveness taken to such an extreme that it's scary to witness. When you're past the sociopath age of nine, this sort of behavior really isn't acceptable. A character should not, under any circumstances, feel that stalking, pressuring, barraging with phone calls, letters, chocolates, anything is a good idea. Forcing themselves onto another person is not romantic or spontaneous, it's sexual assault.
The love interest of your story must be developed, or it will come off as if he or she truly is nothing but a prize. The story might as well be about winning a race or a spelling bee if that's the case. A romance should be created for the chance to meld two interesting, creative minds together to see what comes from it. A love interest who does nothing but stand there and look pretty won't capture anyone's heart. Or they shouldn't, anyway.
Some good examples of balanced romance: When Harry Met Sally, Two Weeks Notice, Sideways, Brokeback Mountain, Once Upon a Marigold, and The Importance of Being Earnest (yes, the characters are all quite shallow, but they're all equally entertaining and share amazing chemistry).
10.) Tragedy: It was all for nothing?
I despise tacked-on characters deaths. You know when I really despise them? When it's at the end of a romance novel or romantic movie. You spent the entire story with these characters and might be rooting for their romance to work out, then you get to the end and one of them dies. And all you can think is, "Why did I watch this? What was the point?"
My personal view is that unless the novel is intended to be a tragedy, a la Aimee and Jaguar, Bent, or Wuthering Heights, then you shouldn't kill off the love interest. Stuffing the love interest in a fridge serves no purpose, if it's done at the end of the story. If your story is meant to be a prologue for a tale of revenge, well fine. But that's not really a romance, is it? That's a complete tease that should never be labeled as a romance.
Spending an entire novel reading about two characters overcoming the odds and finally get together feels pretty futile when you discover one of them has an incurable disease and doesn't have much longer to live. Is this supposed to show the fleeting nature of life? Because most romances aren't that deep. Nor should they try to tack on a deeper meaning when they clearly aren't that profound. I'm looking at you, City of Angels.
Basically, if you feel that a character death is necessary, make sure there's a damn good reason for it in your otherwise innocuous romance. Killing someone off purely to make people cry is, in my opinion, reprehensible from a literary standpoint - not to mention completely lacking in creativity. Why end your romance on a downer if the only point is to wrench tears from your audience? Every death should have a meaning, just as every character you give life should have meaning. Never, ever take your characters for granted by sacrificing them for nothing. They deserve much better.
---
I've gone on for far too long now. Perhaps I've angered some, or made others think hard about the nature of romantic stories. I hope for the most part I've done the latter, though I would be fine as long as I've done both. I made this list mostly for myself, as I'm trying to write a romance of my own. Will I succeed? I don't really know. However, maybe if I follow my own rules and remember the lessons I've learned from writers greater than myself, I can at least come up with something to be proud of.
Remember the line from "Nature Boy"? Say it with me now: "The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return."
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Welcome to the home of The Contrarians Podcast. Want gaming, movies,
entertainment, and social opinions outside of the box? You've come to
the right place. We are not industry insiders/professionals, we aren't
part of any official company, we are simply two guys who feel aren't
being represented by the rest of the media out there, for the most part.
Some
may think we're conservative blowhards, some may think we're
insensitive pricks, hey we're American and you can think what you want,
FREEDOM BABY! Our views are just that, our views. We don't agree with
each other 100% of the time, and don't expect others to agree with us
either. Our goal is to have people listen, share, and spark
conversation. And it never hurts to get a few cunts mad at you every now
and then.
So just to introduce myself to start off with, I am The
Lapsed Geek Once a geek always a geek, even if you do not have the time and
money to be one. I will be reviewing anything that catches my fancy, as well as
anything suggested to me, as long as I can get a hold of it. My plan is to be
doing about 2 or 3 different “shows” in the long run but right now I will hold
to newly seen stuff and a blog I would like to call “Netflix Fodder.” Anywho on
to the review….
To
start off I would like you to imagine a balloon filled to bursting, now what is
it filled with you may ask? Cornball comedy and exposition I would tell you.
And what is that balloon made of you may ask, why that balloon is made of
wonderful action scenes and crazy Nicholas Cage that are stretched so thin the balloon
could burst any minute I would say. Now I would say this analogy is getting stretched
so thin that I should just get to the brass tacks of the issue. So was the movie
good?..... Well yes and no.
What
was good about it? Well a lot of things were good (but I feel a few of them are
only good to me.) For one this is a movie where it could be easily said that
Nicholas Cage was having fun in the role, and it is known for a fact that
Nicholas Cage is at his best when he is enjoying a role. There were some
wonderful manic scenes played by him. There was also some great action scenes, I
can say that during every action scene my eyes were glues to the screen. They
bring back “The Rider’s” ability to change anything he rides, which makes for
some awesome visuals. Now for something that I truly enjoyed, however others
may think that it was a little much in this movie, cornball humor! Given that
this is a comic book movie, even though it falls under the Marvel Knights
production logo, It actually takes some great little joke breaks. There are
certain ones that have already flooded internet so I will say about one of my
favorite, Ghost Rider pisses fire like a freaking flamethrower.
Now for
the bad, sometimes the comedy feels a little out of place in a such a dark and
grittier type of story, funny as they may be. I will not cover a lot of the
comedic problem considering I actually enjoyed that bit of the movie. The
reason I bring it up though is because I feel that I was the only one in the
theater actually laughing. Now for one I feel is a legitimate gripe about the
movie, the arduous and yawn inducing exposition. The placement of the
exposition in this movie for the most part was just so long and drawn out that
I nearly fell asleep multiple times. Given that could definitely be due to it
being my nephews birthday and dealing with a lot of 10-11 boys running around
like monkeys on crack, but even though that is happening it shouldn’t make me
nod off. Now I do not want to hear the excuse “It’s a sequel and they need to
explain the origin story for the people who did not see the first movie.”
Because that argument is invalid, they hardly explained the first movie in fact
they take 2 minutes to explain the origin in the beginning and talk about it
again in at least two other parts of the movie.
Welcome to the pilot episode of a new podcast by me (CircleGuy), ChrisX104 and Dogbert! Pants: Optional is a manly podcast made by men for men (and some women). Today we talk about what makes a manly movie, why Chris shouldn’t be on the internet and much more! Keep in mind that this is a pilot episode: this is the first time we’ve tried this, so it may be a bit rough in places. If you have any suggestions or feedback, you can comment here or email us at This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it
Welcome to my new Blog Segment: "Modern Contemplation" where I talk about my thoughts on modern things in general.
3D.
Those two simple words can easily spark a debate. On whether you enjoy 3D, or (like me) HATE IT. I HATE 3D. It NEEDS TO GO AWAY! ForEVER! STOP IT! STOOOOP IIIIIITTT! But I digress.
...
Journalism, medicine, humor... Today are not unusual cases of labor intrusion. We see them as if they were normal and sometimes even supported.
...
I have always heard from my parents and my brother how great this movie
was so I was looking forward to watching it, I mean it could be like The Sting but a western. Today I will be reviewing Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. Robert Redford and Paul "The Dressing" Newman
The Movie Explorer presents the fifth review in the Fairy Tale Matinée series: the 1977 East German production The Devil's Three Golden Hairs. Loser kid Jakob has one task to complete in order to marry a princess, go down to hell and steal the three golden hairs from the devil. Based on a lesser-known tale by the Brothers Grimm.
Hey folks, welcome back to the New Year of Movies 360. Due to the holidays and other issues that arose, this episode was delayed because of this so for this I do apologise, but nonetheless me, LC & Mikal 5 all hope you enjoy our reviews of this particular movie and the rest we have planned for 2012. So, please sit back, relax, and enjoy our No Reservations episode :)
Heh heh 69..... Anyways today I will be reviewing Tootsie.
Tootsie is a 1982 comedy starring Dustin Hoffman who dresses up as a
women to get a role on a soap opera. I was nervous about this movie for
two reasons.First, this movie is about a man who dresses up as a women
to get a job. Sounds like it be okay but then I saw this:
In conclusion I think this movie is really good. It is very funny and
totally went above and beyond my low expectations. It is a great comedy
with a real dramatic story at its core. I give this movie a B.
Hi, I'm KalKratos. I admit something. When it comes to Mark Millar, I like the movies based on his work instead of the source material. Wanted and Kick-Ass are some of my favorite movies. The reason is because Mark Millar's original works can get too graphic. I don't mind graphic content, but there is a limit to what I can handle. That is why I like the movies better than the comics of Mark Millar.
Now I know that there are a lot of differences between Millar's comics and the adaptations. Wanted was changed from being a fraternity of supervillains to a fraternity of super assassins. And like I said before the graphic content was toned down to a tolerable point. I didn't mind the change from supervillains to assassins. It makes sense that they did that. The idea of supervillains that killed off the superheroes and now control the world secretly is a very "comic book" idea. The super assassin angle worked better. It connected Wesley better to their world by having him be genetically born to become one. Whereas in the comics, Wesley just inherited his father's role. In the film, they recruit people who have the same abilities as they do. It just makes more sense. Also making them assassins for the greater good makes them more sympathetic to audiences. I'm not opposed to the idea of villain protagonists, but I did like what they did in Wanted. Also the last line in the comics is an incredible unpleasant line to read. Whereas the last line in the movie is inspiring.
Now in Kick-Ass, it stays more true to the comic book. But they did make a lot of changes. They changed the name of the bad guy. The near elimination of racist slurs. Big Daddy's back-story. Kick-Ass and Big Daddy's torture scene. The resolution of Dave pretending to be gay to be around Katie. But you know what, all of those things work better in the movie. The biggest change has to be that last one. In the comics, she calls him a pervert for pretending to be gay and then later sends him a picture of her giving her boyfriend a blowjob. That's a pretty crappy ending to a romantic sideplot. Now I realize it is meant to be realistic, but if I wanted a story to end that way, I would just go live my life. I entertain myself with these types of stories to escape. And the ending to the romantic sideplot in the movie works much better. We're happy that he got the girl, and gives us hope that we too can get the girl.
So how does Mark Millar feel about the movies based on his work? Well, he loves them. He has openly said that he is happy with what they have done. And even works with filmmakers to develop the sequels to those two movies. Which is much better than Alan Moore, who despises the films based on his work, even if they were good but not faithful.
So that is how I feel about movies based on Mark Millar's original work compared to his original work. Now what about the movies based on Alan Moore's work. I haven't seen From Hell. I didn't like The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. I loved V For Vendetta and Watchmen. I hoped you enjoyed my blog. Comment below. And you can also find this blog at my website mentioned below.
I didn't even know if was interested in seeing this movie or dreading it, today I am reviewing Modern Times.
You see I have never seen a silent movies (I prefer talkies) so I had
no idea what to expect. I know my girlfriend did not want to see this
at all, but my mother was looking forward to it (I think its because she
is old).
Charlie Chaplin is a very popular, maybe the most popular, silent movie
star. He not only was loved world wide but I have heard how his comedic
styling has been an influence to many people. On the other side of
things he always seemed to be in political controversy by doing things
such as not joining the army during WWI and had some socialist and
communist friends. Well Charlie I have some friends too:
Finally a movie I have seen that my girlfriend has not, it is about time we came around to watching Blade Runner.
First off Blade Runner is not about running with scissors
(hahahahahahahaha I am so funny), it is a sci-fi, or should I say sy-fy,
thriller and I am a nerd and love sci-fi and fantasy movies and books.
Any ways lets get on with the review.
Blade Runner did not see success at the box office but it has
since become a cult classic. I am not really sure what makes something a
cult classic though, I assume it is a fringe movie that is very popular
for its genre or a movie that bombed but then sees later success, but I
am not sure. I have always been a little foggy on the definition but
here is a video of other cult classics takes from different lists found
on the internet:
I am still confused how movies like this can do so bad while in theaters
and then years later make a huge comeback and become culturally
relevant. It has even helped shape modern sci-fi with sources saying
the creator of the new run of "Battlestar Galactica". This movie did
not win any Oscars but was nominated for Art Direction-Set Decoration
and Best Visual Effects.
The all-knowing internet has these rating for the film:
IMDB = 8.3 out of 10
Rotten Tomatoes (Critic Rating) = 92%
Audience Rating (Audience Rating) = 89%
These scores are a little low but that can really be all summed up by
the fact that this movie is a cult classic. It was not adored
nationally or critically acclaimed.
There were so many characters in this movie that I will not touch on all
of them but just the ones that stood out to me. First off we have
Edward James Olmos playing a character who I found to be extremely
interesting. I wish we knew more about him, but then again if we did
the mystery would be gone. It was also weird to see EJO so young and skinny.
Next we have Sebastian a character who is so likeable, awkward, and
meek. This character was well acted and because of that I was very
sympathetic towards this character. Now we have Pris, played by Daryl
Hannah. I don't really like Daryl Hannah or the character, I don't know
why but I just don't. With that said she is one of the images
that stands out to me from this movie. The character of Rachel was
another character I just didn't connect to. She was a good character
and the acting was there but something about her just didn't interest
me. The bad guy of this film, Roy, is fantastic. The acting is superb
and the character makes you challenge the idea of is he really a bad
guy. Should we arrest him or sympathize with him? Fantastic! Then we
have Harrison Ford being a BAMF but he always is. I love Harrison Ford
in nearly everything he is in. The character is awesome and Harrison
Ford is awesome. For me this is another stand out movie of Ford's and a
character I will always remember... though there are some weird parts:
The movie started with a text prologue, which all good sci-fi movies
need I guess, and we are introduced to the future, which is only five
years from now. I love when you watch old movies to see what they think
the future would be like and then as we get closer to it you know it
won't be like that. Anyways the movie itself moves at a very slow pace
and this slow pace easily could have lead to it not be popular when it
was first released. The slow pace does however allow for the
environment and atmosphere of 2019 develop and this is my favorite part
of the movie. I actually feel the movie is more beloved for art
direction then the story itself, which I personally do not think is
anything special. I could be wrong and the nerds of the internet may
get angry but the story doesn't do much for me. It is not bad but it
isn't fantastic either. That does not mean that there is nothing to
learn from it though:
#1: I want to make my own midget friends
#2: Asians will rule the world
#3: Product placement will be all the rage in the future
#4: Retire=death
#5: In the future its night time a lot
#6: Replicants be crazy
#7: Daryl Hannah should be an Olympic gymnast
Now the thing I love most about this movie is the environment. I
mentioned earlier about how the movie was slowly paced, I feel that this
slow place allowed the film to showcase the new world it has created
for this story to take place in. I love it! The buildings are awesome,
the atmosphere the set up is great, the mix of new and old is
fantastic. I love it all. From the huge building with all the lights
to the technology the use like the photo enhancer:
Uncertainty (2009)
Need to do things a little differently this time, as this movie is not
one that can be reviewed in the style my previous ones have been. That
said, I'm not quite sure how to review this, so for the most part, I'm
just gonna wing it and hope for the best.
Let me say one thing first- Joseph Gordon-Levitt is one of my favorite
actors; Brick, 500 Days of Summer, Inception, all great flicks- hell
even his turn as Cobra Commander in GI Joe was entertaining, and I'm
looking forward to his role in The Dark Knight Rises. I'm not quite
certain how I found today's movie, but more then likely I was skimming
JGL's imdb page and saw it was coming out, then watched the trailer. The
film looked interesting, but still took me some time to actual find a
copy and watch it. Going in, I'm not sure what I was expecting, and now
that it's over, I'm not sure what I think of it.
The plot is pretty inventive I'll give it that. A couple, Bobby, played
by Levitt, and Kate, played by Lynn Collins, stand on the Brooklyn
bridge and discuss what to do- about what, we are not sure just yet, and
frankly neither are they it seems. They decided to flip a coin, and
though no stakes are given nor is the outcome shown, they both seem to
know what they are going to do and proceed to run in different
directions off the bridge. This leads to the film's selling point- both
possibilities for the day's events are played out. One leads to the two
going to Brooklyn to spend The Fourth of July with Kate's family, the
other takes them to Manhattan and the discovery of a lost phone being
sought by dangerous people.
I think my biggest issues with the film is with this idea- not that I
don't like it, far from it, I like the idea of two diverging paths
stemming from a single decision. What bugs me is that to do this the
film needs to sacrifice portions of both stories. The family BBQ story, a
drama, tends to have more development; we learn that Bobby is Canadian,
that Kate's family has issues with their relationship and with one
another- an uncle with Alzheimer's, a deceased brother, a sister looking
to leave school, and a nosy mother are all present, but don't move much
from those basic character tropes. We also learn that Kate is pregnant
and she and Bobby are unsure of what to do about it- another decision
they were discussing on the bridge. The family dynamic is interesting,
as is the decision to tell them of Kate's pregnancy, but it doesn't go
anywhere .The couple even find a lost dog on the way and take it in, but
we never learn why it was lost or who it's owners are. The Manhattan
storyline on the other, being a more action thriller styled piece, lacks
much development and sticks to the basic formula- someone finds
something important, two others seek it out, are willing to kill for it,
finder must figure out what to do to survive. Well Kate's pregnancy is
mentioned slightly, it doesn't matter and doesn't stop her and Bobby
from running through the city avoiding the people looking for the phone.
Both stories have potential, and likely could have made decent films on
their own with more time and development, but trying to put them
together leaves both lacking.
Now I understand the idea the movie is presenting is that one choice can
change everything, and thus we need to see the bits of both stories to
understand the different paths, and this is an interesting and novel
approach to take. However, in my opinion, for a movie to work there has
to be a conflict or something at stake, and while the latter story has
this, it is rushed and the conclusion seems tagged on to coincide with
the ending of the former story, which while the conflict seems to be
whether Kate will tell her family or not, this is brushed aside as
nothing by the end, making it seems pointless.
There are some positives to the film however- Levitt and Collins have
great chemistry, and in both stories you do believe they are a real
couple trying to deal with their situations as best they can. I'd say
the realism they possess is one of the films biggest strengths, because
simply by being there they make the situations they are in seem real by
association. The Manhattan story, while plausible, is a cliched plot
that only really has any weight because those involved are real enough
to draw the viewer in. Likewise, the Brooklyn story allows this realism
to shine further, as the interactions between the couple and the family
members seems very much like a real family get together, little is
forced.
One reason for this I believe, comes from the fact that script was
written without dialogue. According to imdb, the actors developed the
dialogue during rehearsals with the help of the directors, which I
believe is the core reason that the interactions seem so organic- these
aren't people reading some writers words, they are reading from a script
they themselves helped create. Outside of the interactions, there are
some good throwaway lines, such as when the couple compare stories of
where babies come from they heard as children; Kate tells Bobby her
father told her babies grow on trees, whereas Bobby's father told him
that he came from his balls. It's a chuckle worthy line but sounds like
something a real person would say.
So let me summarize just a bit- the cast is good, the acting is good,
the dialogue is good, and the idea is a good one in theory. However, the
execution of the idea is lacking and because of that the film as a
whole suffers from a script that pushes an original approach over fully
developed stories. That said, it was still a decent film, though I doubt
it will be joining my DVD collection anytime soon. Still, if you like
the concept or like me are a JGL fan, give it a shot, might be more your
cup of tea then it was mine.
2.5 Different Timelines out of 5
Until next time, I'm the Drew, and I'm certain I Be Awesome.
Notice how I say least favorite not worst. It does, after all, boil down to opinions, not ot mention, I didn't see a lot of the particularily bad ones. So I say right now, I never watched Jack & Jill or Twilight, so neither of these are on here, for example.Also, don't have too much time, so I won't go into too much detail. Why top 11? Couldn't decide which of these to take off the list, so couldn't go with ten.
11. Red Riding Hood: Just generic on every level, with terrbile performances and direction. Directed by the director of the first Twilight, it seems almost all of the cast are just rejected auditioners for the roles in that film. Amanda Seyfried gives her worst performance, and even Gary Oldman isn't trying. The costume design and some of the sets were really good, and there was a lot of potential here, but terrible execution.
10. The Rite: I tend to enjoy exorcism movies, but found myself not enjoyign this one at all. Hopkins looked bored, and the only redeeming scenes are the incredibly hilarious scenes of Hopkins being possessed, but those are so terrible they are funny. Big disappointment.
9. Sanctum: It had decent 3D in it. The only positive I will give this film. Boring as hell, with incredibly annoying and poorly acted characters. But thankfully, hardly anyone saw this.
8. Season of the Witch: I wanted to like this movie. I expected a bad, popcorn Nic Cage flick, but this was just terrible. The trailers made it look semi decent, but this is probably one of the worst movies Cage has done, which is saying a lot. And the CGI at the end was atrocious.
...Drew On Movies
Brain Damage (1988)
There are certain directors out there that can make dozens, even hundreds of films, and only a select few are worth the time and money put into them. There are others who can make only a few films and have almost every one of them be entertaining. Frank Henenlotter is one of the latter. Not counting sequels, he has made four movies, three of which I have seen; Basket Case, Frankenhooker, Brain Damage and Bad Biology- this one being the one I have yet to watch. But the three I have, I have enjoyed to varying degrees. Basket Case is a bizarre film that while not amazing, was worth watching if for not other reason then it's effects. Frankenhooker on the other hand, is hilarious, and in my opinion a film any b-movie lover should not only see but own.
What makes Henenlotter's films different then others is simply heart and effort- you know he does not just toss out a film, there is a lot of energy put into these films to make them enjoyable- the use of practical effects, you know, what we had in movies before CGI took over, is some of the best- watch Basket Case and remind yourself that the titular creature isn't real. Henenlotter really seems to care about his craft- sure he knows he's not making Oscar contenders but that allows for greater freedom I think- not everyone will see these movies but the real fans will, and they are the ones that matter.
The last of the three films and today's entry stands outside the other two as the film with a message- that's right, a low budget horror comedy with a moral, is 1988's Brain Damage. This was actually the first Henenlotter film I heard of, if memory serves it was mentioned in an article on one of my movie sites and I then tracked down the trailer. Still, I decided to leave it for last, not only due to it being called the director's best, but also because I wasn't sure I was ready to watch it. Until today, and I'm glad I waited, because it was worth it.
To follow up last week's blog on The Godfather I figured that I might as well as review the sequel right afterwards, so today's review is The Godfather Part 2.
Like I mentioned last week I have never seen these movies so all I knew
about this one is that it is always on "the best sequels of all time"
lists. Oh, and I also know according to almost everyone the third one
is stupid. Anyways, lets get on with the review.
As I mentioned before the first Godfather has had a huge influence on
culture and I think the same can be said for this movie. These two
movies work so well together that I think it would be difficult to
separate the impact of each movie. The one thing this movie has offered
us though it one of the best sequels in film history. Now not all
sequels are great in fact most aren't:
I know some of you might not agree with my list and to you I say, my
opinion is more important so keep your comments in your pocket. This
film not only is one of the best sequels ever but also cleaned up at the
Academy awards. It won six Oscars for: Best Writing, Best Picture,
Best Music, Best Director, Best Art Direction, and Best Actor in a
Supporting Role (De Niro); as well as being nominated for five other
awards.
Now it is time for everyone's favorite part.... the internet ratings!!!!!
IMDB = 9 out of 10
Rotten Tomatoes (Critic Rating) = 98%
Rotten Tomatoes (Audience Rating) = 96%
So despite many people feeling this sequel surpasses the first movie the
internet rating are all slightly lower. I wish the internet could make
up its mind.
Now it is time for my favorite part.... my own review!!!! Acting once again was fantastic. Though I was sad that characters like Tom were in it a lot less. I really enjoyed his character in the first one and just would have liked to see this character built upon more. Diane Keaton returned as Kay and though her acting was good, man do I hate her character, but I feel that the character is supposed to stir up emotions in us, it is one of those characters that, depending on how you view the morals of other characters, is either likeable or you hate her. The bad guy in this film was fine but the character was not anything spectacular. There is also a character named Frankie, the actor was nominated for an award and when I saw that I didn't even know who the character was. You see, I am really bad with names when there are a lot of characters so some of the names slip through the cracks of my brain. Anyways, he did a good job and his character was good as well. Now for the Corleone Family we have Talia Shire, playing Connie, who is not only annoying but barely in this movie. Yet, she was nominated for an Oscar! How? How does this happen? She was only in it for ten minutes total yet it was Oscar worthy:
Movies that were released in US in theaters/DVD this year that I saw. One note is that I haven't seen X-Men First Class yet but I want to. Some on this are not going to be agreeable to others.
10. Green Lantern. I didn't hate this movie a lot of people do. I think they got a lot of characters right but story wasn't to great. Well they tried to combine two villains into one and didn't work. Probably would have been better if they had made Sinsetro the villain but still enjoyable to me.
9. Transformers: Dark Of The Moon. I didn't hate it as some did. You get what expect and if expecting anything else well you are going to be greatly dispointed.
8. Priest (At least uncut version on the dvd) I heard this movie was bad and then watched the dvd. It's really good but maybe dvd version is better cut then the one that was released in theaters.
7. The Disappearance of Haruhi Suzumiya. After the mess of season 2 and endless 8 Haruhi gets back to being what should be. Fun. Yes it goes a little to long but it is interesting story and it's fun.
Drew on Movies
To Be or Not To Be (1983)
Oh Mel Brooks, you crazy Jew you. I've been a fan of Brook's work since I was a kid, when my dad first showed my brother and I what was at the time, Brook's latest film, 1993's Robin Hood Men in Tights. Not long after, while home sick, I watched the film on television, followed by 1987's Spaceballs. From there it was a matter of time before I started going through the rest of Brook's comedies, usually with the help of my dad. Was a few years later when he taped Blazing Saddles and Young Frankenstein for us to watched, and that pretty much cemented it- Brooks was a comedic genius.
However, for a time, these four pretty much remained the only Brook's films I watched. I knew of a few others, but rarely had the chance to watch them. After watching the musical remake of The Producers, which I enjoyed, I found a copy of the original which was also really good. Still, it was while watching trailers on the DVD for Men in Tights that I learned of three other films that I would begin to track down: High Anxiety, Silent Movie, and To Be Or Not To Be. The first I happened to catch on television, and soon after bought on DVD. The second was harder to find but worth it, although the DVD I purchased, while new, skips during one scene- and of course, I no longer had the receipt.
That left me with today's movie, which took even longer to find then Silent Movie. 1983's To Be Or Not To Be, like the Maltese Falcon before it, is a remake of an earlier film. However just the same, I will allow it on the grounds that- it's Mel Brooks, do I need another reason?.
We are independent filmmakers in college. Here is our reel of our production from 2011 if you're interested. Check us our at
https://www.youtube.com/CQVFilms
Best of 2011
Theme Song by Brian Setzer and owned by Walt Disney Records
2011 was a very interesting year for media. It brought 3 superheroes to the big screen, resurrected 4 beloved franchises, brought an end to a phenomenon that began when an 11 year old boy received a letter from an owl, gave us the Chinatown of our generation, gave us a god awful installment to another beloved franchise and gave us the best reviewed, praised, and awesome super hero game ever created. This is the best and even the worst of 2011!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
MOVIES
...Drew on Movies
The Maltese Falcon (1941)
Right off the bat- I love me a good Film Noir. There is just something about a story filled with hard-boiled private detectives, seductive femme fatales, and enough twists to make M. Night Shyamalan cream in his pants that makes me all warm inside. Hell, my main pieces of writing have all been heavily influenced by the conventions of the Film Noir, but even with that said, I've only been able to watch a few in my life, as most are older and thus harder to find flicks.
This is not the case for today's movie, as it is a classic and classics, regardless of age, tend to stick around. I knew of this movie in name only, only learnt of it's Noir plot thanks to a friend of my brothers, and only got a real taste for it after watching it parodied in Neil Simon's The Cheap Detective. Still, only when digging through my back logs of movies to watch and seeing it did I think to give it a shot, and I'm glad I did.
The movie is of course, 1941's The Maltese Falcon, based on the novel by Dahiell Hammet, and a remake of a 1931 film also based on the novel. Normally I avoid remakes of any sort, but seeing as this is the version most people are familiar with and it came from a time when remakes were not just pointless cash grabs, I can let it slide.. That and it's got Humphrey Bogart in it, and the original does not, so that counts as a point in its favor.
The Plot
The Movie Explorer tackles an Asian B-movie favourite: Wolf Devil Woman, another insane Taiwanese kung-fu/wuxia fantasy action flick, made in 1982. A young woman raised by wolves is destined to liberate the land from the ice-powered, inexplicably Southern-accented Red Devil. Directed and written by actress/star “Pearl” Chang Ling, apparently using sets on loan from Sid & Marty Krofft and costumes left over from the previous Halloween. The review contains an overdose of references to botany and 1960s pop culture, for some reason.
Blip.tv: http://blip.tv/themovieexplorer/the-movie-explorer-wolf-devil-woman-1982-5851963
Youtube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M91EcE1dHEg
Drew on Movies #1
Leon: The Professional (1994)
Howdy folks, this is my attempt at an actual movie review, not just some quick tidbit on Flixster or something, but an actual review. I have a long list of movies I've meant to watch and now have the time to do so, and while doing so I figure why not try my hand at this. I'm going to be ripping a little off the style used by The Blockbuster Buster for his Honest Reviews, because I like the structure he has and it seems workable.
To start, a movie that I almost watched once before, back when there was still a Superclub Videotron near my house. Alas when I decided to rent it, it turned out that the disc had been stolen years before and they had not replaced it (and they wonder why that location shut down), so it remained on my To Watch list until recently. Might be for the best, as I don't know which version of the movie the store had, while I do know the copy I watched today is in fact the full cut of the film, which is a plus.
The movie is 1994's Leon, or The Professional, or Leon: The Professional, depending on what source you check. Honestly I don't quite remember how I learnt of this movie or what originally convinced me to put it on my list, but I can say that whatever reason was justified. This is a pretty good movie, but we'll get to that, but first.
So it is the Christmas season and instead of putting on a fire and
snuggling up to watch some Christmas movie we decided to watch The Godfather.
Now if you are like my families and friends you might find it weird
that I have never seen this movie, if you don't think it's weird then I
like you more then them. But, I do know certain things about the movie
(referential pop culture things) as well as know that this is a very
well liked movie so I was really looking forward to watching it, almost
as excited as you are to read this review.
Like I mentioned earlier The Godfather is referenced multiple times in media, some of which I didn't even know because it was from my childhood:
Okay,
okay, okay, I know Fat Tony might not be a normal "Godfather" reference
but in my naive youth I thought all Italian gangsters were references
to The Godfather. This movie though next to maybe Goodfellas
is probably the most referenced mafia movie in pop culture. This film
also broke new ground by being a movie told from the side of the mafia.
Most mafia or gangster movies at this time were more focused on the
police trying to stop the mafia. All sorts of movies and TV shows now
take a look from the side of the mafia, one of the most recent ones
being The Sopranos (though the mob dressed better back in the day then
they do now). This film won three Academy Awards for Best Writing, Best Picture, and Marlon Brando for Best Actor in a Leading Role.
Now lets see what the always positive people of the internet have to say about this film:
IMDB = 9.2
Rotten Tomatoes (Critic Rating) = 100%
Rotten Tomatoes (Audience Rating) = 97%
Holy cow these are some high ratings, I guess not everyone on the internet is negative.
Now before I start my own personal review I want to talk about how weird
it is for me to watch older movies and see how young some of the actors
look. I feel it is very similar to how when you see pictures of your
parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents, etc. as kids and teenagers and you
think to yourself, "you were young once?" Well the same thing happened
to me while watching this movie:
Before
I talk about the individual characters I just want to say that all the
actors were great. I really thought that this was a very well acted
movie. This movie had so many characters so there is no way I will be
able to talk about them all so I will just talk about the ones I had
either positive or negative opinions on. First of the character of
Clemenza was awesome. I cannot explain why I liked him so much but I
just thought he was awesome. Not sure if you ever like characters like
this, you know, the ones that aren't that important, or even in the film
much, but for some reason you really like them. That is what Clemenza
is for me. Now the family has some great characters and some not so
great characters. Fredo and Connie were both pointless and annoying. I
have no idea why these characters even exist. They were so pointless
and underused that they might have well not even been in it. Kay played
by Diane Keaton was another character that did not really add much to
the overall movie. Honestly the most i can say about her is that Diane
Keaton looks better now then she did then (holy big forehead Batman).
Then we have Vito, the character we all know, played by Marlon Brando.
It is really hard to me to judge this character and this acting since, I
CAN"T UNDERSTAND HIM:
So
I will have to go with what other people say and just say he was great
and the character is great too. Now we will get to my three favorite
characters of the movie, Tom (Robert Duvall), Sonny (James Caan), and
Michael (Al Pacino). All these characters were not only interesting but
were awesome characters. I would watch a "Sopranos" like series if it
followed these three characters. I really really liked them.
The story was very good and for a three hour movie there were not many
times I was bored. It was great to see the character development. At
times the pacing may seem slow and the movie does take some time getting
to the main plot line it feels but I think it is worth it if it adds to
the movie. The characters were well developed and the feeling of the
movie was established. I really wish more movies would do this. I
don't want to ruin the main story for you because I really enjoyed it
and I want you to have the same experience. The script was fantastic.
My only question is why do they always use Mario references. Now I also, as always, learned something from this movie. Here are just a few things:
#1: Horse heads are not as nice to cuddle with as teddy bears
#2: My Italian stereotypes aren't really stereotypes
#3: Cops suck (seems to be a trend)
#4: Italy is boring
#5: Women are more dangerous then shotguns and have lightning powers
#6: Babies crying are REALLY annoying
#7: Al did not age well
The music was really great in this film (one of the songs in is the Now
and Then video). Though it was not something that really stood out all
the time, when I did notice it I really enjoyed it. The effects,
stunts, etc. were nothing to write home about (which is weird since I
live at home) but they were not distractingly horrible either.
In conclusion, I really thought this was a good movie. It was well made
and I really enjoyed watching it. Now I don't think it will become a
movie I watch over and over again, but I did like it. Why do some great
movies never become a movie that I can watch multiple times yet some
lesser movie like Ocean's 11 can become a movie I watch almost every time it is on? Whatever, my grade for this film is an A.
Well we have come to another James (Jimmy) Stewart movie, today's review is no other then Rear Window. I was looking forward to this movie because, one my mom and girlfriend talked about how good it was, and two, I liked Disturbia.
Also this is Alfred Hitchcock and to my knowledge I have never seen a
Hitchcock movie all the way through. All this to say I was in good
positive spirits going into this review.
Rear Window is based off a short story and directed by
Hitchcock. Some even say it is one of Hitchcock's best works. This
film was nominated for four Academy Awards including Best Director.
While the film making aspect of this film is not ground breaking the
story itself is one that has been referenced and redone many times:
One of the most recent adaptations slash remakes is Disturbia starring Shilabuff (sp?). Funny story about this though is that Distubia
got sued for plagiarizing the book. I guess they didn't ask for
permission of something. I was going to look more into it but I got
bored.
The internet tells me that Rear Window should be critiqued like this:
IMDB = 8.7 out of 10
Rotten Tomatoes (Critic Rating) = 100%
Rotten Tomatoes (Audience Rating) = 95%
These ratings are very, very, very, very, very high. Seems like the internet really likes this movie.
Now lets see what I think, because that's the opinion I trust most. The
characters in this film were decent. The women both Stella the Nurse
and Grace Kelly's character were both very amusing. Stella at moments
was down right hilarious and Grace Kelly was fun but mainly she was
there to be pretty. The cop friend of our main character was a flat
character as was the mysterious man they were watching. Nothing were
super special about either of these character but both were played well
and important to the story. Now our main star James (Jimmy) Stewart was
the same old James (Jimmy) Stewart he has always been. I still feel
that he is the same person in everything and all that changes is his
occupation and motive, but I don't care I think he is still awesome.
The story was very interesting and suspenseful. The tension of spying
on someone and not really knowing for sure what is happening is a great
idea though I am curious if this is where the Patriot Act came from.
Anyways, this movie was great from beginning to end, but for some reason
during the climax I kept thinking of this song:
The script was well written and there are some saying the use back then
that I wish we used today. Phrases like "hows your stomach?" "empty as a
football". I want to use this in the near future and see how people
react. As always there were lots of things an audience member could
learn from this movie. Things like:
#1: Don't count on cops
#2: Girls dance around in their underwear
#3: Women pretend to have dinner parties
#4: People eat fish heads and rice
#5: People don't use blinds or curtains often
#6: Dog don't use elevators they use baskets
Wow! What a wealth of knowledge I just laid on you. Also what the
frick is a rear window? This didn't take place in a car. Do people
call the windows in the back of their house a rear window? I need to
know because this whole time I just call them windows. I want to make
sure I use the proper name.
The cinematography in this movie was great. Combined with the silence
used in some scenes I really felt like I was spying on these different
people outside of the window. It really helped in building up the
suspense and drama in this film. While cinematography and sound may be a
strength to this movie special effect well...... look for your self:
If you didn't get enough of a biased fanboy review in my Lord of the Rings review then you are in luck because today we are reviewing Raiders of the Lost Ark.
I love this movie!!! I love Indiana Jones!!!I feel like everyone loves
this movie (except for one friend I had who never saw it because she
thought it was a "boy" movie). I love the ride at Disneyland.
I was so happy that I got to watch a movie like this and it made me
realize that I wish a lot more of the AFI Top 100 movies were movies
that I liked. Frick, I just wish more movies were like Raiders.
Anyways enough of my gushing love for this film lets get on with the
review.
Now once again I may be biased in my view here but I feel Indian Jones
is one of the most iconic American film characters of all time. I mean
if he wasn't such a huge icon why would the South Park kids feel like this:
So if everyone is this upset about the fourth movie then Indy must be a pretty important character. Also I think he might have inspired Devo to write a certain song:
In all seriousness though, when this film was released it received high
critical ratings and one four Oscars for Best Art Direction, Best
Effects, Best Editing, and Best Sound. It also received a Special
Achievement Award for sound effects editing and was nominated for four
other Academy Awards including Best Picture. The film also was included
in the United States Library of Congress' National Film Registry as
having been deemed "culturally, historically, or aesthetically
significant."
Now we will take a look at how the nerds of the internet have to say:
IMDB = 8.7 out of 10
Rotten Tomatoes (Critic Rating) = 94%
Rotten Tomatoes (Audience Rating) = 93%
I guess these rating are okay, but if the internet was really smart they would all be one-hundred percent.
Now get ready for me to start my biased portion of the review (if it
wasn't biased already). The acting in this movie is fantastic. The
baddies to be honest are not the greatest in movie history. Rene is a
decent main bad guy but never seemed to be a real threat. Then we have
the Nazis who... well they are Nazis so yeah.... But then we have Arnold
Thot, played by Ronald Lacey, who is one of the most memorable villains
from my childhood and I believe has one of the most memorable scene in
this movie. Now lets move on to the good guys. First we have Sallah. I
love Sallah, he is such a great side kick character. He is loyal,
knowledgeable, helpful, and just they guy you want with you when you are
hunting for ancient artifacts. Sadly, Sallah doesn't have a love
interest in this movie, but Sallah can explain why:
I didn't exactly forget this when I did the article on the main show. I just couldn't quite figure out how to fit it in.
See, Red Green's Duct Tape Forever was a telefilm based on the Red Green Show. The plot was that the Canadian environmental protection service had fined the lodge again, this time for all the crap they'd wound up putting in the lake over the years, amongst other such shenanigans. The total fee was something like $7000 that had to be paid by the end of the month.
Merry Christ....oh wait it's not quite the most wonderful time of the year, but what better way to kick off the festive season than with the Movies 360 team discussing a great classic Christmas movie. As usual, please leave your comments, thoughts, etc and...ENJOY! :)
Before I start my review I need to complain a little first. I hate it
when people talk during a movie that I am really trying to watch. I
also hate it when people get a phone call and answer the phone but don't
leave the room. Now, with both of these little pet peeves, I was about
to yell at my dad when I was watching this weeks movie, The Wild Bunch,
and he was on the phone and decided to sit down and watch the movie
while still on the phone. Really dad, really!? Anywho... I knew next
to nothing about this film before I watched it other then previews
made for movies in the 60s are very different then previews now. I did
know that no matter what that this movie had to be better then The Philadelphia Story (and yes I will keep using this as the standard of bad movies until I watch a worse AFI movie) so I was excited for that.
Now this movie really helped change the landscape of film making. For
its time it used revolutionary techniques such as multi-angle editing
and using normal and slow motion. This was interesting to learn since
for me techniques like those have always been part of the action movies I
watch, so to think of how audiences must have felt when they saw these
techniques must have been awesome (why doesn't awful mean to be full of
awe?). Also this movie was controversial for being graphically
violent. Meaning this movie let us have this:
The graphic violence in The Wild Bunch is nothing compared to movies like Kill Bill or Saving Private Ryan,
but to be that movie to really push the graphic violence envelope I can
see how this movie earned its way to being a big part of American
cinema history. This film was nominated for two academy awards for Best
Original Score and Best Screenplay.
According to the internet we can see that The Wild Bunch got the following reviews:
IMDB= 8.1 out of 10
Rotten Tomatoes (Critic Rating)= 97%
Rotten Tomatoes (Audience Rating)= 89%
We can see here that this movie seems to vary in its ratings. We have
one rating which gives it a vary high 97% while another rating gives it
almost a 7 out of 10 (for those who don't know math that would be a
score in the 70-79% range).
Now its the time you have all been waiting for, my opinion. This movie
seems to have lots of characters all sort of forming different sides in
this crazy Western. First we have the Mexicans, who were hard to
understand, mainly cause all they did was speak Spanish. What ever
happened to making everyone no matter their nationality speak English so
the audience can understand? Anyways, the Mexicans were just a big
pile of racial stereotypes. They sorta reminded me of drunk versions of
this:
Then we have the bad guys? Okay I have been curious about this issue for a while now. When the main characters in a movie are outlaws are they still the good guys? For example in Ocean's 11 are they good guys? If they are the good guys does that make the people who are out to stop them the bad guys? If so this means its possible to have our good guys to be criminals and our bad guys to be cops. I guess we will chalk it up to perspective. So in this movie (according to our perspective) the bad guys are funny. There weren't much a point to a few of the characters other then to be obstacles for the "good guys" but I was entertained by them. The main bad guy was an interesting character but I did have a hard time telling him apart from the main good guy in some scenes. I guess I have to admit a weakness of mine... in old movies I have a hard telling main characters apart from one another because I feel that they all sort of look a like. So, now lets talk about the "good guys". Fist up we have an old crazy drunk man who is awesome, though it does seem that every Western needs an old crazy drunk guys who just looks gross and laughs the whole time. Next we have Angel the token Mexican "good guy". He isn't a walking stereotypes like the other Mexicans in this film but that's all I can say about him. I don't really like him or dislike him:
...It’s a musical. Made in 1984. Starring multiple Razzie award winner Pia Zadora. Scared yet? You should be! It’s called Voyage of the Rock Aliens and it also features Allison La Placa, Ruth Gordon and Michael “Pluto” Berryman earning their paychecks.
Blip.tv: http://blip.tv/themovieexplorer/the-movie-explorer-voyage-of-the-rock-aliens-1984-5731866
Youtube: http://youtu.be/-OtPlZ_L47w
Welcome one and all to another hilarious episode of Movies 360. As ever, if you have any feedback, comments etc for us, please feel free to leave them. And above all else...ENJOY! :)
I know, I know, there's still a month and a half left before the year actually ends, but really, what new movies are going to come out before then?
It's been a couple years since I've seen enough memorable movies to do something like this. Basically, what I'm going to do here is do a quick list of the movies I saw this year and say a few brief words about them. They'll be roughly in the order I saw them and will be providing links to reviews where applicable. Let's begin, shall we?
The Green Hornet: As I said in my review back in January, The Green Hornet gave me good reason to think that 2011 would be a good year for movies, and I was not let down. This movie gave us the origin story of the Green Hornet, which was actually a team comprised of a bumbling face man named Britt Reed and his partner Kato, who is a more likely hero. While the ending did imply that there was a possibility of further movies, it didn't directly imply that there would be more.
...I love Christmas. It is my favorite holiday and every year I start to watch my favorite specials, movies, etc around thanksgiving. Here is a list of some of my really favorite ones especially the ones I watch every year. I start before thanksgiving and that is why I am posting this.
30. South Park and Robot Chicken christmas episodes.
29. Prancer
28. Animanicas: Helloooo Holidays
27. Ren and Stimpy: Have Yourself A Stinky Little Christmas
26. WWE Tribute To Troops. What wwe does every year for the troops is amazing especially during the holiday seasons. In previous years they actually would go over in perform in Iraqi or Afghanistan. Now they are paying tribute to those station here in the US too. Wrestling may not always be great but showing some love for the troops during the holidays is.
25. Ranma 1/2 Christmas TV and OVA episodes. Anime rarely have christmas episodes or specials but Ranma has a good time with it.
24. Live Action How The Grinch Stole Christmas. I know people are going to hate this but I love Jim Carrey as the grinch. I love this movie and how it fleshed out the character.
23. Jingle All The Way. I love this movie despite what NCritic said about it. It's funny and Arnold is just dad looking to get the gift for his son. That something all parents can relate with.
22. Micky's Christmas Carol. Fun retelling of the classic with Disney characters.
21. Justice League Christmas Episode
20. Xena Christmas Episode. Yeah it wacky origin of Santa but fun and well xena was wacky as it was. It knew it was and embraced it. Nice little bit at the end with the donkey and who they give it too.
19. Shrek the Halls. This is nice little christmas special about shrek dealing with having family and celebrating christmas. He never celebrated and shows dealing with changes in his life. It's nice and funny. All the cast from shrek movies are here too.
18. Powerpuff Girls Fight Before Christmas
17. Love Hina Christmas Special
16. Power Rangers: I'm Dreaming Of A White Ranger. I am a big power rangers fan and well I can't but help love this special. It's goofy but got rangers helping santa claus against Lord Zed and Rita.
15. Alf's Christmas Special. Another sort of forgotten special but touching and sad. Family go to old cabin for christmas Alf ends being mistaken for a toy. He is given to sick girl at a hospital and what happens and just brings me tears. Heart warming and is funny. Alf was great show and this great special.
14. Ziggy's Christmas Special. Sort of forgotten christmas special but very heart warming. It is dvd so I say track it down if you can. Ziggy tries to raise money for charity but ends up in a scheme that wasn't for kids. How it gets out of it and how un selfish he is truly a great thing. There isn't much dialogue wise but there didn't need to be.
13. Miracle on 34th Street (1994). Yes I do like the remake better then original. I just love the cast and this such a great story.
12. Garfield christmas special. I love garfield and this one awesome special. From wacky opening to really touching moments with awesome grandmother.
11. He-Man and She-Ra Christmas Special. I love this special as a fan of this show. I don't care anyone says if goofy but fun. Yes virgina there is a GI Joe christmas episode.
10. Frosty the Snowman
9. Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer
8. Any Muppet christmas special. Muppets are always fun but even if it's Christmas Special (guest starring Fraggle Rock, Seaseme Street, and cameo from Hensen himself) or Muppet Christmas Carol you can't talk about christmas without mentioning them.
7. Scrooged. Billy Murray is one of my favorite actors and this movie shows why. He funny and plays a great scrooge in modern times.
6. Ernest Saves Christmas. I love Ernest movies and this movie is goofy and funny. I know Critic hated it but I loved it. Just a great way to laugh and enjoy the holidays.
5. A Charlie Brown Christmas. I love Peanuts and this is true Christmas classic that holds up years later.
4. Home Alone 1/2. Yeah after two this series goes down but first two are funny and just enjoyable to watch.
3. Santa Clause Movies. Yes the squeals are no where as good as original but still the original is really and well squeals have there own charm.
2. National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. I am a big fan of comedy and this movie is really funny. Chevy Chase is hilarious and so is the rest of the cast. Any time you think your family has problems then turn this movie on.
1. A Christmas Story. Okay I know this is a beloved christmas movie and for every reason. It's a classic and I enjoy to watch even if its on dvd or on tv during 24 hour the maarathon. Who couldn't sympathize with a kid that really wants something for christmas but told he can't have it.
Honorable mentions: Elf, Doctor Who: The Other Doctor, Mr. Magoo Christmas Carol, Sonic's Christmas Blast, GI Joe Christmas Episode, Die Hard 1/2, Lethal Weapon 1.
OMG! This is the greatest movie I have ever seen in my life! Well, not really, but I did think so when this movie first came out. This week I am reviewing The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring. Unlike all the other movies I have watched from the AFI Top 100 to date, this one I was extremely excited to watch. I love this movie. I would say I am a fanboy but then I have seen people who go to Comic-Con so I guess I'll just say I am a fan. Just to give you some background on how much I love these movies and stories here are some of the things I have done:
See this movie in theaters either five or six times
Read the whole trilogy of books every year before each movie came out
Watch the cartoon (which did have some awesome songs)
...Hello, everyone!
My name is Master Graveheart. I'm a bit of a hodge podge nerd whose been coming to thatguywiththeglasses.com for a couple years now. At least since the Team Brawl was first aired. I won't claim to watch everyone, mostly because I just can't, but I try to stay familiar with what just about everybody does. I have my favorite reviewers, of course, but that's another blog.
The point of this blog will primarily be my own reviews... primarily because, well, I'm a writer, but I'm no film student. I have ideas, but no acting appeal. Plus, have you heard my voice?! Oh, right, you haven't... good for you! :)
But, in all seriousness, I think for me, for now at least, I'd like to stick to text reviews. Eventually, I'll throw in images to make it nice and purdy, but for the most part, they'll just be my own thoughts. One thing I won't do is bring something down for not being like another. I'm going to do my darndest to judge it on it's own merits. Now, if there was something that worked better elsewhere that was tried with what I'm reviewing, I'll bring it up, but I won't expect it to be something else.
Also, I'll try to keep my blogs as "safe for work" as possible, primarily because I keep my language pretty clean in my personal life too. I won't guarantee that I won't swear at all, but it won't be unnecessary. Translation: If you don't have a problem with Linkara's videos in terms of language, we won't have an issue either. ^_^;
...
Oh boy, we’re opening up a can of worms with this one.
Let's just get to the point!

Yes folks, this edition of Movies 360 is our Halloween special where we divulge to you our Top 10 Frightening Characters in cinema. ENJOY!
This week's weeks review is High Noon. Now I actually was looking forward to watching this movie but that may be due to last week's movie (I mean anything compared to that will be better). I do not have much experience with Westerns, but that most likely stems from the fact that Westerns aren't as popular as they used to be and I hate old things, speaking of, despite this being made in 1952 it is still in black and white (ugh). Anyways given this wasn't The Philadelphia Story it was a lot easier to cowboy up and watch the film this week.
High Noon was one a the first movies to be set in real time. Meaning that movie time and real time move at the same rate. This caused me to think of this every time they looked at a clock:
Except instead of Jack Bauer kicking ass it is a sheriff. This film was also selected from preservation in the United States National Film Registry by the Library of Congress for being "culturally, historically, or aesthetically significant". I have no idea what this really means but it makes this movie seem really important. Also feel free to look up what this means for me, I'm to lazy. Also John Wayne hated this movie because it was an allegory for blacklisting......Anyways! This film is also referenced in Die Hard:
...Well well well, welcome friends to another exciting episode of The Blockbuster Chick. When we last met my arch nemesis Walrusano decided to take a looooong vacation so I went on to my alternative job - Judge Blockbuster Chick. See the results of what happens when I mess with the law! Enjoy :)
I have just finished watching what may be the worst film I have ever seen. And that really is saying something. I’ve seen ‘The Room’, ‘Troll 2’, ‘Birdemic’, ‘Plan 9 From Outer Space’ and ‘Battlefield Earth’ but at least they had some redeeming features. They were all, in some way enjoyable. They fall into the category of film that can be described as being so bad that they are good. It is fun to watch them just because they are so bowel-shatteringly awful and the important thing to remember is that each film takes themselves completely and utterly seriously. Cheerleader Autopsy doesn’t fall into this category. It falls into the so bad, it’s bad category and one of the reasons for this is because it’s intentionally trying to be funny and as far as horror comedies go, it makes yesterday’s entry, ‘Horny House of Horror’ look like Shaun of the Dead.
So what makes Cheerleader Autopsy so painfully unfunny? Is it the crude, incredibly lowbrow humour that includes a close up of someone hacking of their own penis (is every film I review this week going to involve some form of genital mutilation?), pressing down just above a dead girls corpse to make a jet of water shoot from her vagina and a hillbilly mistakenly shooting himself in the head when he thinks there is something wrong with his gun? No, I generally consider myself to be quite immature but these jokes just weren’t hitting home. I think what it may have been was the constant stream of immature and gross out humour. I think back to the films that I love which have quite a high level of what could be considered juvenile humour, such as the films of Kevin Smith, and the reason I’ve enjoyed them is because whilst they do have that level of immaturity, they are well written and always have something else going on in them as well, something substantial that raises the level of the film as a whole. Cheerleader Autopsy is poorly written, cramming as many stupid jokes in as it can within it’s short (but seemingly excruciatingly long) 73 minute run time and it has nothing of substance to fall back on.
So what is the plot of Cheerleader Autopsy? Well, that’s kind of like asking what is the meaning of life. There could be many interpretations but the question itself is practically unanswerable. There’s a cheerleader team called the Stinkwater Beavers (oh, the hilarity!), they get killed, there is a mental mortician who also happens to be the sheriff of the town and his nephew who works as his assistant. The mortician has another assistant who’s a bit socially retarded because he has a small penis (he’s the guy who chops off his own in order to attach a larger member from a body that’s brought in) and now that I think about it, I think there’s only one actual autopsy… although I suppose the film isn‘t called Cheerleader Autopsies so far enough. Oh and there’s jokes and hints about necrophilia and eating the brains of foetuses littered throughout. Now that I think about it, maybe it is the crude humour that makes this suck. I mean, eating the brains of foetuses? I’m a man who regularly makes jokes about paedophilia and even I think that’s going a bit too far.
Of course, the humour can’t be completely held responsible here. There’s also the terrible acting, terrible editing, terrible sound, terrible camera work, terrible picture quality and terrible everything. If you’ve seen Birdemic, imagine all of these things being a fraction better than that and yet Birdemic still remains the far more enjoyable film. Look, I’m really sick of thinking about this film and I’ve got a pub quiz to get ready for. Time to get completely drunk. To sum up just imagine you had a really stupid friend with a camcorder and a worrying level of access to a number of Real Dolls. The result would be something like this film. To further sum up, just watch the damn trailer. 0 pints out of five. Laterz.
This week I watched The Philadelphia Story.
When I first put this in my Netflix queue list I thought it was a movie
about AIDs and homosexuals... I was wrong. Just so you don't make the
same mistake as me. This is Philadelphia, this is The Philadelphia Story.
Now, as I have mentioned before, I do not like old movies, especially
black and white movies, so I really did not want to watch this. I was
trying to convince my girlfriend to watch a different movie but she
didn't want to. So like I said, this week I watched The Philadelphia Story.
The Philadelphia Story is based off of a Broadway play of the
same name and was also Kathrine Hepburn's first major role after a
series of flops and even used the help of Howard "The Aviator" Hughes to
get the rights to the play so she could star in the movie. Why don't
actors do this more often? maybe the do, but I feel that it would be
cool to buy the rights to a movie just so you could act and look awesome
in it. The Philadelphia Story was nominated for six Academy Awards and
won two: Jimmy Stewart (also why did I grow up my whole life calling
him Jimmy when in the credits his name is James?) for Best Actor and
Daniel Ogden Stewart for Best Adapted Screenplay.
Now lets take a look how the interwebs has critiqued this film:
IMDB= 8.1 out of 10
Rotten Tomatoes (Critic Rating)= 100%
Rotten Tomatoes (Audience Rating)= 92%
So looking at these score I feel like this movie has to be one of the
greatest movies of all time. Though critics gave it fantastic reviews
audiences seem to give the movie around a B+. These rating gave me some
hope as I watched the movie. The internet can't be wrong, can it?
Now its time for my personal look at the movie, starting with the
characters. We will start with Mother Lord and Father Lord. They are
fine and do not really have big enough roles. Honestly I felt at times
as if these characters were not really needed. Uncle Willie is... well
he is creepy (more on that later). Dinah is a great character and very
funny. My only negative thing to say about this character is that I
wish she was in it more and did funnier stuff. Now one of the other
funny characters is Elizabeth Imbrie played by Ruth Hussey. She has a
real quick wit and just great comedic timing. Her character was very
enjoyable and I wish she had more opportunities to show her comedic
skills. John Howard as George Kittredge was important as far as plot
goes but as a character was boring, bland, and not very likeable, though
that may be the point of the character. Now we will get to the three
stars of the film, Cary Grant, Kathrine Hepburn, and James (Jimmy)
Stewart. Cary Grant plays Dexter Haven and my girlfriend loves him, I
don't know why. My thing with this character is that I am not sure if I
am supposed to like this guy and root for him or not like him at all. I
have a hard time being neutral on characters and I want to but Dexter
into one category or the other and by the end of the film I wasn't sure
how the audience was supposed to feel about him. James (Jimmy) Stewart
plays Macaulay Connor. While watching this movie I realized James
(Jimmy) Stewart plays the same character in everything he is in (Note: I
have only now seen him in this and It's a Wonderful Life).
Here he is in It's a Wonderful Life:
Now just because he seems to act the same in his movies doesn't make him
unenjoyable. Actors like Michael Cera, Jennifer Aniston, and Ryan
Reynolds seem to play the same characters all the time and I still like
them. Finally we will talk about Kathrine Hepburn. First off I need to
ask if you guys think she has annoying voice. After the movie my mom
and girlfriend were discussing Hepburn and her voice and how it wasn't
as annoying in this movie as it is in other movies. I didn't notice
anything wrong with her voice and felt out of the loop so maybe you guys
can help me out. Ok moving on, I didn't feel like she was anything
special in this movie, especially given that this was a break out role
for her of sorts. She did play off the male characters well though.
Now the story is really what made this film not workout for me. I don't
want to spoil the movie so I won't go into details. The premise that I
thought the movie was originally going to go for when James (Jimmy)
Stewart's character showed up would have been great but it seemed that
idea lasted about 30 seconds. Then the story went into this messy love
triangle story where I wasn't sure which character I was supposed to
want to get the girl in the end. This "romantic" movie's ending really
got me confused but I don't want to spoil it here. Also I learned two
things from this movie:
#1: Domestic abuse is fine and even funny?
#2: Sexual harassment is funny, especially if it comes from a family member
I am not a hardcore feminist or anything but wow did this movie seem to show that females are men's toys to play with.
Now lets talk about a few other things that go into making a movie
starting with the lighting. There were many times that the lighting was
so bright or something it seemed that Hepburn was glowing, like she was
some kind of angel or something. I don't know if this was just the
style back then or something that just happened more often in black and
white movies or what. I am not a film student or anything I just know
it was weird. Another weird thing was the costumes. There was at one
point where Kathrine Hepburn looked as if she was wearing a night cap. I don't know if this was all the rage back then but it looked silly.
Overall this movie was okay. It did have funny moments, even if I
didn't understand some of the sayings, and the acting was good. The
think that really ruined this movie for me was the plot. I can not get
over how this movie views domestic abuse. Also I do not understand
why this movie is in the AFI top 100. Maybe later I will feel different
about this movie but for now I give this movie a D+
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So the big news on the internet right now is that Seth MacFarlane has decided to end his hit TV show, Family Guy. All his fans are grieving over this and are bitching about it in blogs, their facebooks, and twitters. I should say right now that I love this show. It has smart comedic timing, witty one-liners that everyone knows even if they can't remember what episode they can from and unique characters that everyone either relates to or knows a person like them in real life. I love how the show isn't afraid to make fun of our social norms and pop-culture with a few political jokes sprinkled here and there. I have seen every episode and can quote a lot of the popular comedic dialogue. That being said, I think I know what I'm talking about when I say that I agree with Seth MacFarlane. The show has been dragged on for far too long and no longer has the same entertaining affect.
Besides the interview Apollo was kind enough to hang out with us during the recording of Episode 7. We are sorry for any audio issues but we did our best to make sure you could understand what everyone was saying.
So this week on The PutzCast we hit up topics we never thought we'd discuss and some may well wish we never did...Why don't you love me daddy?!

When you think of internet reviewers a few names come to mind.
And when you think of films makers other names come up like.
But 2 of these people are one and the same. The Mastermind behind "The Reviewaverse Saga" and I do mean mastermind. But more recently there was a bit of controversy about the mysterious leaving of Apollo from TGWTG.com. And so far his reasons for leaving have remained a mystery. There were rumors but there is always more to rumors than are apparent.
So here to give the full story on why he left is Matt "Apollo Z. Hack" Burkett.
Also Apollo said that this will be the last time he ever talks about this so for all who want to know direct them here. Also do you want us to interview anyone else? Apollo has extended the offer to get in contact with other reviewers and critics, so if you want us to then let us know!

Greetings once again loyal viewers to another exciting episode of Movies 360...well, this'll be an interesting episode, let's just leave it at that ;). So sit back, relax and enjoy!
Nappa's first review is in the works and for all those anticipating his first will be the hilariously strange game. Comic Jumper! But the less said the better it will be!
And to tide you over for both his review as well as the next PutzCast I present to you the second Movie-Faction.
I do hope you are enjoying these and I love that the first one was rather terrible while this one is way more in depth about the actual movie.
So Please enjoy the reviews and the podcasts! And have a great time on the newly acquired theputzcast.com!


Pouches and muscles like chunks of ham. Joy. 
geh... the 90s was not kind to the comics stereotype 
How many people saw this coming?
Welcome back friends to the 3rd episode of the latest podcast - Movies 360. On today's episode, we review the next movie in our list that is connected to last episode's movie "Halloween". No clues as to what it is...you have to watch the episode to find out. So, sit back, relax and....ENJOY! :)
Alright today we will be looking at our first movie... Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.
Now I was not excited at all to watch this movie. Like I have
mentioned before (and will continue to mention) I hate old things.
There are only a handful of movies/tv/music that I like that was made
before 1980 and given that this movie was made in 1937 I was complaining
to my mom (yes I am lame and still live at home) and my girlfriend on
how I didn't want to watch this, but a man has to do what a man has to
do.
Now Snow White was the first ever animated full-length featured film. This means this film laid the foundation for animated movies to become a norm. It is extremely hard for me to think of a childhood without animated movies. Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs paved the way for so many films like these:
So as you can see they aren't all that good but I guess you have to take
the good with the bad. Also this helped make Disney the awesome
empire they are today. Now I am an unapologetic Disney lover. I go to Disneyland all the time,
I love their movies, I pretty much worship Walt (not really just saying
this for dramatic effect), and I own mouse ears (this is true.... I'm a
dork) and this movie helped start their movie dominance. They now have
had movies nominated for best pictures and many rides at their theme
parks based on their rides. So despite my feeling towards old things, I
love animated movies and Disney so I have to pay some respect to his
film.
Next we will do a quick rundown on how this movie rates according to Rotten Tomatoes and IMDB:
IMDB= 7.8 out of 10
Rotten Tomatoes (Critic Rating) = 97%
Rotten Tomatoes (Audience Rating) = 72%
So looking at these scores it seems that critically this movie still
means a lot and is a great piece of work for its time but it seems some
people out there think like me and rate older things a little lower :)
Now for my person critique. Lets start with the characters. We have
the huntsman, who is pointless and also his voice acting is miserable.
Many of the characters in this movie have bad voice acting and I guess
one can say its due to the time it was made in and to that I say I don't
care. The prince, who is in this movie for a whole 3 minutes is
pointless and stupid. Now lets move on to more important characters
first we have the queen. She is awesome! But before I go on I have
always always always always wondered what she is wearing.
What is it? A hood? Is she bald? Gone gray and embarrassed? I mean
if she was bald or losing hair it would explain why she isn't the
fairest in the land I hope someone out there can tell me. Anyways she
is one of my favorite characters from this movie she is evil, for who
knows what reason, scary when she turns into that hag, and she is sorta
hot... I mean umm..... So she is so scary my girlfriend won't go on the
Snow White ride at Disneyland. Next we have the seven dwarfs. These
guys take up so much time in the movie it should be called The Seven
Dwarfs and Snow White. There is so much time of them just being funny
and doing their thing. I love these guys and without them this film
would be really boring. Now on a side note I always heard the dwarfs
are representative of different stages of drug use or something like
that (I have never done drugs so I may sound ignorant) like using
cocaine or I dunno. Now some of them make sense but the one I still
don't understand is Bashful. Does taking drugs make you shy? I don't
get it. While we are on this side note when ever Sneezy was about to
sneeze they would put their finger under his nose like this:
I just don't get it. Oh well. Now lets take a look at Snow White...
well she is boring. Her personality can be summed up as being nice.
Also he singing voice is one of the worst things I have ever heard, but
we will talk about that later.
Now The story of Snow White is fairly simple yet it is entertaining
enough with the help of some good characters. The movies moves quickly
and yet slowly is parts as well. Now I don't want to spoil any of the
plot since I hope by reading this blog you want to see some of these
films I will just sum up the things I learned:
#1: Being pretty is important
#2: Women should clean to earn their keep
#3: Ugly = Scary/evil
#4: You don't need a good personality just good looks
#5: Don't talk to strangers
#6: Kisses fixes everything
I hope you take all of these to heart and apply them to your life today. Seriously though the story is ok for a kids movie.
Now lets do a quick look over on the animation and music. The animation
is decent for a movie that old and when I was a kid I didn't think it
looked that bad but compared with animation today it looks sub par. I
don't care if it was awesome in its day, cause its my day now and I
think its is just ok. The music is both great and horrible. Some songs
are good and really make me remember my childhood, also the score is
good as well. But then Snow White sings
Stay on top, or remain from the underground... |
Where a bit spoiled for choice, now, aren't we? I mean, us nerds. Used to be a time when no one thought X-Men franchise was going to exist in live action. That is, until the first X-Men movie: 1996 TV movie pilot Generation X. Finally, we could overlook and ignore the idea for 4 more years!
This weird, forgotten little nugget starts with a dictionary description of what mutation is, as well as the illegal status of having the X-Gene. You're not gonna get no Senate hearings, here, no siree. Just pure mutant hunting! Sentinels, Soldiers...
...Good day revieweverse, and welcome to the 2nd episode of the latest podcast to hit the airwaves: Movies 360. In this episode, we start off the 6 degrees line with the iconic John Carpenter horror flick - Halloween. So, please sit back, and enjoy! PLEASE NOTE: The opinions expressed in this podcast are only our opinions and do not reflect anybody else :)
After a couple of reviews Blank and Twitch decide it's about time to introduce themselves properly.
I've been following this site for a very long time. Years even, and that's saying something given my short attention span and lack of human empathy. But following it has given me plenty of time to read lots of comments and watch lots of reviews and I've come to a brief realization about critics; they influence a man's thoughts. Regardless of whether or not you want it to, they influence your thoughts.
Let me be clear; I love the Nostalgia Critic. I find him funny, clever and entertaining on many levels. However, I have noticed something in the comment sections of not only his videos but many other reviewers on this site that sort of makes me scratch my head; the comment, 'I remember seeing this as a little kid...' That wouldn't be so bad, really if it stopped there, but this comment usually is followed by something like, 'Even then I thought this was stupid', or something along those lines and I have to stop and ask myself, 'Self, do you remember what you thought of [insert movie/game/comic here] when you first experienced this when you were five?'
My usual answer? 'It was a cartoon, of course I liked it.'
My point is simply that how many of us can honestly recall what we thought or felt the first time we watched a movie? I know when I was kid and Batman and Robin came out, I liked it. Now, yes, it's a terrible piece of trash, but when I was a kid, nothing mattered like a complex plot that made sense or deep character development. All that mattered was seeing Batman and Robin beat up the bad guys and save the day. And just to be clear, I REALLY hate Batman and Robin now. Another example, Three Ninjas with the same response. When I was a kid, I didn't care about plot or characters as a general rule--it was three kids beating up adults and it was easily imitable on the playground. What did I care if the plot was stupid or the characters shallow?
So, even if no one ever reads this, I want to ask the question: When you're watching these reviews, are they coloring your past? Are you allowing it to tint your memories to make you seem like you've been some intelligent cynic your whole life? Wouldn't it be nice to simply look at this movies, let the flaws be pointed out and then remember when they came out and be honest with ourselves? When you're a kid, unless you really did grow up in a house of snobbish intellectuals (in which case why the heck were you watching such tripe in the first place?) then I will say that I am doubtful that any of us really did look on any movie with disdain and and turn our noses up because of how 'stupid' it was. You can ask a kid and they'll tell you whether they like it or not. "Why, little Johnny/Susie, don't you like Three Ninjas?" And you have my solid oath that I will give you five Sealand dollars to you if that child replies with something along the lines of, "I found the movie shallow and pedantic' instead of, "I don't know.'
58: Spider-Man 2 (2004) OK, so they F-ed up Doc Ock's origins, but IMHO, Alfred Molina's performance MORE than makes up for that.
57: The Sixth Sense (1999) Sidenote: I think Lady in the Water is underrated.
56: Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989) What can I say that hasn't been said a thousand times and a thousand times better?
55: Spaceballs (1987) Any idiot can do a parody of something they hate, or something they think they would hate if they ever bothered to check it out (again, the Epic Movie fucknuts); the real challenge comes from satirizing something you enjoy, and Mel Brooks, a fan of Star Wars and Star Trek, does so here.
54: Some Like It Hot (1959) Best closing line from any movie ever; of course you need the full context of the movie for it to be funny.
87: Sky Captain & the World of Tomorrow (2004) If you have a soft spot for the classic sci-fi of a bygone era, this is the movie for you.
86: Heathers (1988) Like if goth kids made The Breakfast Club. ;-)
85: Garden State (2004) A fun movie with an amazing soundtrack that probably would not have been half as good if anybody other than Zach Braff has made it.
84: Sneakers (1992) A snapshot of the early days of hacker culture, and a fun little heist film rolled into one.
83: Grease (1978) Nostalgia Chick, I like you, I really do, but you over-thought this one.
How it will go; Rank, Title, Year, One sentence comment by me.
116: Underworld: Rise of the Lycans (2009) Best prequel EVER!
115: The Motorcycle Diaries (2004) Che Guevara before he went batshit and was genuinely admirable.
114: Light It Up (1999) A bit cliched, but still touching IMHO.
113: Toys (1992) Underrated dark satire on the military-industrial complex.
...Part 0; wherein I explain some things before getting to the list without hogging up space ON the list.
OK, so let me get this out of the way now; yes, there are many more movies I would have LOVED to put on this list. But, I'm a Liberal, so I'm hardwired to be fair, and I didn't want the list to be over-saturated with the same types of movies, the same directors, etc. etc. Had I not set some rules for myself, all but two of Kevin Smith's movies, half the Trek films, 1/3rd of the Star Wars movies, and about 6 Woody Allen flicks would've made up the Top 20. Not to mention that pretty much every documentary about music I ever liked, and several complete trilogies...
Yeah, I had to do it. I had to make rules for this list for, if no other reason, than for the sake of my own sanity. As it stands I think there may be too many music related films on here, but let's move on.
So, here are a few of the rules I'd made for myself when putting this list together.
1: One film per franchise. I cheated a little by having two Trek films in the Top 40, but I justified that by saying one was TOS movie, and the other was a NextGen movie, so that's sort of different. Feel free to rake me over the coals if you think I should've just vagged up, stopped being a cock, and limited myself to one Star Trek movie.
...I love me some vampires. In fact it’s well documented on this very blog. One of my first blog posts talked about how Dracula saved me as a kid. Now with the Fright Night remake hitting America I thought it would be a good time to look back at my top ten vampire movies. This was pretty damn hard but I got there in the end, as always these are the movies that have stuck in my mind. So let’s get out there, make like Dennis Miller and stake some vampire bitches.
10: Sundown: The Vampire in Retreat (1991)
Oh hi western themes, meet a vampire movie. I will admit that this isn’t the best movie in the world but there is just this sense of fun that is present through the entire run time that charms me. I loved this when I was a kid. Basically a human family is brought to a small town in America to work on a factory that will produce fake blood that can be used by hospitals. Townsfolk get around wearing sunscreen, sunglasses and umbrella’s during the day, seem a little kooky, but are actually pretty nice. Unfortunately rogue vampire elements are about to start a vampire civil war, so they can feed on real blood. Throw in Bruce Campbell as the descendant of Van Helsing and fun is to be had by all.
09: Dracula (1931)
Bela Lugosi is awesome. The only time he is more awesome is when he’s being played by Martin Landau in Ed Wood. But I digress. The presence that Bela gives to the character of Dracula is why the character has been cemented as one of the classics. Even I recognised the Bela version of Dracula even though I never saw the movie when I was a very small child. Just remember you can only do the creepy hand thing Dracula does if you’re Hungarian and double jointed. I think that's why Gary Oldman will never surpass Bela as Dracula in my opinion. Oh but the one thing Francis Ford Coppola's version did have over the original was Tom Waits as Renfield.
08: Fright Night (1985)
The original and so awesome that Hollywood took one look at it and said “There is money to be made from that name boys. Quick to the remake vehicle.” An everyday kid sees finds out his neighbour is a vampire and he needs to become the hero from all the old horror movies he’s watched. I think the real joy of the movie is how it plays with the conventions of vampires, it’s actually pretty old school with the vampire rules, and yet actively goes out of it’s way to modernize how we view vampires. Add to all that a wonderful performance by Roddy McDowall as Peter Vincent, a late night horror movie host who becomes a fearless vampire killer; kind of.
07: The Lost Boys (1987)
Only number seven? Outrage. Well look I love this movie, the Two Corey’s are great, Kiefer makes for a frightening vampire, special effects are great, the ending is humorous and this was one of those movies that was watched numerous times during my childhood. It’s just I have plenty of other vampire movies that I adore or respect just a little bit more it gets beaten down to this position. But don’t worry it’s not going to be beaten by Dracula 2000, no sir. If I was being truthful with everyone, I think this movie loses a few points because of the fashion. I mean wow, people dressed like that? Still Kiefer did look bad ass so it can't be all that bad.
06: From Dusk Till Dawn (1996)
Okay vampire killers, let’s kill some vampires. Clooney just makes this movie cool, and it was this movie that really grabbed him attention. Sure he was the heart throb doctor on ER, but damn did he score some major bad ass points with his role as Seth Gecko. From the warped mind of Tarantino (writer) and Rodriguez (director), what starts off as criminals on the run, turns to a balls to the wall vampire survival movie. In fact when if first came out many people thought it was a crime movie and where completely surprised by the vampire in the second half. That’s what’s so great about this movie, it doesn’t matter if you know vampires are in it, the gear shift in mid movie means you won’t be bored. Also it’s nice to see some brutal bloody vampires. They do not mess around. Beating people with severed limbs, ripping heads off, and all down with a Mexican flare that just makes it a little more unique than the average vampire movie.
05: 30 Days of Night (2007)
Speaking of brutal vampires. I love the comic book series, and was excited to see what this movie would be like. While not everything was what I hoped for, at least the vampires rocked the house. Predator like, they were feeding machines, sharks with human characteristics. The innate sexiness that vampires seem to exude was stripped away and audiences were left with something unfamiliar. I also like the fact that you don’t get a lot of explanation about the vampires, they just appear and begin to feed. Not knowing exact origins of the vampire made them scarier. Also any movie that has Melissa George in it, and that I can stand has to be high on the list.
04: The Night Flier (1997)
The vampire in this one is kind of in the background, a white whale to be chased down if you will. The Ahab of this tale is tabloid reporter Richard Dees as played by Miguel Ferrer. I was entranced by the character Richard Dees and his manic search across rural America for a serial killer he believes to be a vampire. It’s a unique vampire movie, and an adaptation of a Stephen King story that works. By having the main character chase down the vampire there is a pace to the movie that some vampire movies lack. Also when all is said, and there is the big reveal, holy heck was it cool. Do yourself a favour and watch this movie.
03: The Night Stalker (1972)
With this television movie we stay in the realms of the reporter, and take a look at one of my favourite characters. Carl Kolchak (Darren McGavin) is a reporter in Las Vegas who begins to think a serial killer is possibly a vampire. In fact he looks at the evidence and knows he’s a vampire he’s just got to make the city officials believe him. It’s great to watch a smart character piece everything together early, and instead of going full on vampire hunter he tires to convince the police to do the killing. Kolchak is a smart man, through and through. The vampire kind of plays second fiddle and doesn’t really have enough time to be all the memorable, but for me it’s the location, they way the story is played out, and of course the most excellent character that is Kolchak that truly makes this movie.
02: Interview with the Vampire (1994)
I don’t like my vampires too weepy. The oh woah is me act grates on my nerves. Personally unlife is wasted on some vampires. So here we go with a movie where the main character Louis (Brad Pitt) is a constant whiny bitch. Thank goodness for Tom Cruise (I didn’t think I would ever say that) as Lestat who really gives a good showing of what a proud vampire should be, something between your best friend and the devil. But this movie is a really good movie about a vampire recounting his unlife, while Louis isn’t normally what I like to see in a vampire it’s very well acted. Also seeming the story spans many lifetimes we get to see vampires in different situations across time and the world. Sexy, stylish, a wonderful story that manages to really get in depth into the psyche of different vampires.
01: Near Dark (1987)
Kathryn Bigelow made a vampire movie that is poetry in motion, a true love letter to the night and the world vampires inhabit. A young man falls in love and the girl turns out to be a vampire. She turns him as she also has feelings for him as well. It could have been a wonderful love story, but it gets seriously screwed up when her family is introduced. Here we have vampires who are a close knit family, they actually have some values that we can admire, and yet they are scary as hell as they have no compassion towards humans. We are cattle to this fucked up family. This movie hits upon themes of family, love and life. The way this movie is filmed is beautiful, and captures the night in such a way that you can understand why the vampires love the night. Truly my favourite movie as it has memorable characters, some gruesome set pieces, and can both make me shudder and intrigued.
(Go to http://theworldofdisgruntledmonkey.blogspot.com to see more of my stuff.)
Welcome one and all to the premiere of a brand new podcast on the revieweverse: Movies 360, with your hosts Mikal 5, LC & me The Blockbuster Chick. In this pilot episode, we divulge to you what the concept of Movies 360 is (basically playing the 6 degrees of Kevin Bacon with different movies) & our Top 5 personal favourite movies of all time. So, sit back, relax and enjoy our pilot episode! If you could please leave your comments and feedback that'd be great.
DISCLAIMER: The opinions expressed in this podcast are only our opinions and do not reflect anybody else
I´m sry that this took me so long!I had a lot of work to do so lets start: First: I´m German so normally my English is bad :) I try my best to improve it and i hope you guys notice that ^^ but lets start with today's subject!
First I want to make clear: I LOVE(!) Comic Books and Movies! So naturally if i notice that a Movie, based on a Comic Book comes out, i´m hyped and cant wait for it. If it is Watchmen, Spider-Man or Green Lantern. As soon as it hits my country i´m going in Nerd mode watching it. And i have to admit, most of the time i´m fine with it. Sure a movie can never be as good as the Comic book, but in my opinion it doesn't has to be. It just has to honor the characters and give me 2h of fun and enjoyment. For me there are only a few Movies who failed badly with that: The Hulk Movies, Spider-Man 3 (THIS IS MY BATMAN & ROBIN!!), Daredevil, Electra,Superman Returns and of course every Batman Movie made by Joe "i´m going to hell for that" Schumacher. Hmh..quite more then i thought.. But what is the Difference between a good and a bad "Comic Movie"? And how can we make a good one? Well lets dig into This Blog and find out!
1) The Right Comic: Before you make a Movie out of a Comic Book, you have to think about it!Is the story worth it or even doable? For example:
BAD CHOICE: Making a movie based on the Obama the Barbarian Comic. The President of the United states running around in a leather skirt fighting monsters is just stupid. So i bet we will see it sooner or later..
A Good Choice: Marking a Movie about Captain America. This is just a brilliant idea. Cap is not only a totally bad ass character but also a true American hero that is also well accepted in other countries and nations. His Back story is heroic but simple and The World War II setting just adds
Why why why why why why why???? WHY are they making a Jurassic Park IV?? It's rumored to be made on imdb (here's the link: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0369610/) and all I can think of is why they thought this would be a good idea since the last one was soooooo good. It's rumored to star Jeff Goldblum reprising his role as Dr. Ian Malcolm (guess Jeff really can't get any other good parts in movies), Kierra Knightly, Dwayne Johnson (ughh....), and Sam Neill as Dr. Alan Grant.
......COME ONE GUYS!!! Jurassic Park was so big in the 90's but so terrible in the 00's that it just shouldn't be made anymore. This is ridiculous!! WHY WHY WHY!!!!!
I am Kimmi_Cub and....ugh this is a movie I will not be seeing.
Recently a new Apes movie came out with James Franco titled Rise of the Planet of the Apes which is essentially a reboot origin story. I have not seen it yet but really want to because of how different the story takes this franchise compared to the original. The original story arc did the time travel ripple effect which was clever but could be confusing to time travel theorists. For example say that the current time line shows the economy is bad (which really is) but it wasn't originally in the the original time line yet it exists because someone from the future that benefited from the bad economy went back in time to make sure it happened the way he grew up into in the first place. Sorry if I got your brain scrabbled but that's generally how the original planet of the apes story was. Even though this new movie obviously is using cgi apes, I think it will be a great way to see how they can put all of the ape behavior to use. There has been talk among those who have seen it had some negative view about the ending. Not sure what it could be about the ending that may be bad but when I do see it Ill give my honest opinion. What is clever is how James Franco is in this because he is a scientist in this movie doing experiments. James Franco..science...experiment...SPIDERMAN anyone?=) well I hope the movie is good.we shall see.
My top 7 favorite Super Hero movies
Hey there members of TGWTG (and random stumblers-upon), today I present to you a top # list. Why? Mostly just cause I just felt like making a blog that’s different than my podcast episodes. I decided to do it on my favorite super hero movies. This is because, with the summer blockbusters including Thor, X-men, Green Lantern and Captain America (and my planning to see them all), I found myself sharing my thoughts on these types of movies with my friends. So I figured I’d compile this list of my favorite ones. Of course this implies personal biased and that I’ve actually seen the movies, but I’m also only going to feature each super hero only once, so no one movie series gets too many spots on the list.
So here are my “Top 7 Favorite Super Hero Movies”. Why top 7? No reason other than I only felt like talking about these 7. I could have rounded out a top 10 with Mystery Men, Sky High and probably the Incredibles, but I don’t have much to say on those; they just don’t pop to my mind like these.
...This week my review is of a film that tries to be hipster-bation but fails. It's called 9 Songs.
Hey folks, I'm back! I'll have a brand-spanking new episode for your delectations next week, but to tide you over... I've gone and blathered over my Galaxy Quest episode. Oh well, Enjoy!
And be here next week for: The Road to El Dorado, a Forgotten Trad-animated classic from Dreamworks. Don't Miss it!
This blog is actually a redo of a blog a did several months ago. My first attempt at this, really kind of sucked, I barely explained why they were overrated, the pictures didn't show up, and after watching some of them again, I actually liked them more. So I'm going to redo the list, and keep in mind that this list doesn't count money, I like Avatar, yes it is far from perfect and doesn't deserve the highest grossing film of all time, but I enjoyed it. Nor does it count if only a certain demographic defends it, such as Twilight or Matrix Revolutions. Also, I want to say this now, I don't hate all of these films, in fact 10-6 I actually kind of like, I just don't find them to be as good as a lot of people say.
10. Catch Me if You Can
Rotten Tomatoes Score: 96%
...Jaron, Robert and Louie review Fast Five and Thor.
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Robert reviews Bridesmaids.
Hey can we talk, about something that we just can't put to rest, the X-men series. I'm sure this is something that has already been talked about to death, next to the Star wars movies. But this is something that I grew up with, so it left a greater impression on me, as I'm sure it did others.
I remember when I was in the forth grad, hearing from a friend about an X-men movie being done, and I was so excited about it. And looking back, thank god they never went through with then. Could you imagine how awful it would of been? Yes they would of been in there costumes from the series, but really, it would of looked horrible. I imagine it would of been something like the Fantastic four movie that was made in the 90's and was never released. Or was it the late 80's. Either way, I heard and saw that it sucked.
But we finally got our X-men movies, much later, and they were awesome! Well the first two were, part three sucked, and the Wolverine movie wasn't any better. And I will admit, I did like the movie the first two times that I saw it in the theater, but later upon retrospect, I thought about a lot more, and I realized. That movie SUCKED!
And you can admit that there were a few problems with the earlier movies, but at least they were good and entertaining movies. What were the problems, Cyclops. Yes he's a douche bag, but he's suppose to be a great leader. But all throughout the movies he's:Knocked out, taken captive, mind controlled, and finally they just decided to kill him off. At least in the cartoon series they were able to establish that he was the leader, and a good one too. And also the fact that all the movies were always about Wolverine, maybe a side character had a bit of a story. But Wolverine was always the focus. And also the fact they used well established villains and then just kill them. Like:Sabbertooth, Toad, Striker, (Although I never really knew him that well.) Death strike, and others.
The first problem I had with the third X-men movie was when I noticed that they made Juggernaut a mutant, and as part of the series, and his character, he isn't. His powers are magical. But there were a lot of other problems with the third. Killing Cyclops, killing Jean Grey, Killing the Professor, and turning both Rouge, Magneto, and Mystique human!
...Continuing my mainstream focus for the month of June. These are mainstream movies that should have been more successful but for whatever reason never found their audience.
The third in the mainstream list is the 1999 sci-fi action thriller Deep Blue Sea.
In my reviews I often dissect the movie. I don't give away everything but it still falls into spoiler territory. So please don't watch the episode if you are afraid I'll ruin the movie. I will say, I've have had numerous people that seek the movies out after they've seen my videos and told me the film was still highly enjoyable. So take that as you will.
With that out of the way, please enjoy the show. 
Deep Blue Sea
Sometimes you want to just sit back and be entertained. Deep Blue Sea is the perfect movie for that. Director Renny Harlin has a track record for making very entertaining over the top action films.
While the movie does take some silly turns here and there, the action moves so fast that you don't really think about it until after it's over. With some very impressive animatronic sharks chasing the actors around, the visuals are often astounding. Occasionally some bad CGI creeps in but it never detracts from the overall enjoyment of the film.
Comments and criticisms are greatly appreciated
Okay, here is my list of movies everyone hates but I like. But I am not going to list movies that Doug already had mentioned on his list of movies he likes but everyone seems to hate. Don't get me wrong, I liked movies like Atlantis, Spider-man 3, and The Cable Guy. But I am going talk about the movies I like with a passion but everyone else hates. So here is my list of movies I like but everyone seems to hate.
5. Something Wicked this way comes (1983)
I didn't see this movie until recently, I watched a YouTube video of Top 10 scariest Disney Moments, and the narrator of the video said “You should see it, but it will freak you out.” And I was like, “Okay, I will check this out.” I asked my Dad to request this movie on Netflix, and when I saw it, IT WAS LIKE THE SCARIEST KID'S FILM I HAVE EVER SEEN!!! The story is about a carnival that came to a small town, and the owner of the carnival named Mr. Dark (Jonathan Pryce) started granting everyone’s wishes, but with a painful price, that changed the way I looked at Disney movies. For example an old teacher became young, but as a result became blind. And there was this guy obsessed with women, ended up becoming a mindless slave. And Mr. Dark's performance was so spine-chilling he should've been on Nostalgia Critic's Top 11 Scariest Performances. However the reviews were mixed, and it was a bomb in the box office, but I think I see the reason why, it was just to scary for little kids. The only complaint I have for this movie is this ex-football player who has one arm and one leg wished for his missing limbs to grow back, but the next time we see him, he was among the search parade as a little kid, I was like “That's the price he had to pay to get his arm and leg back!? That is more like a bonus gift than a price!” I mean he got younger, that is what every adult in their life wants! But this is a really scary movie, if you like to be scared, than go watch this, the scary scenes are awesome!
...Inspired by Doug Walker's 5 Second Movies.
At a recent film festival, I had the opportunity to watch three movies, Skeletons, Bird on a Wire and Mission London. As this is an RPG blog, I will discuss the lessons each offers in terms of gaming.
"Transformers: Dark Of the Moon" is owned by Paramount Pictures and Dreamworks Pictures
"Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides" is owned by Disney Pictures
"Sucker Punch" is owned by Legendary Pictures and Warner Brothers Pictures