LOUZY VILLIN WEE ADORE TOP SIX WEEK: EARTHWORM JIM

Greetings, everyone. This is it. Our number one. It's been a nice list so far. We've talked about a goldfish who is an evil overlord, a psychotic crow, a queen bug who is a sex-symbol, a green worm in a cyber suit, and a mad scientist with a monkey grafted to his forehead. Each one of these villains is great, funny, and awesome in his own way. But today the list ends. We all knew it. We all knew who Number One would be.

Cats are meanies. For some reason they were portrayed as emissaries of the Devil during the middle ages. They are also often the pet of choice for evil masterminds. Yeah, remember Ernst Stavro Blofeld? Dr. Evil? Cinderella's stepmother and her kitten Lucifer? Dr. Claw? Giovanni and his Persian? The list goes on. Besides, cats play with their prey before they go for the kill. How cruel is that?

My cat, Charles, is now staring at me from across the room. Maybe I should move on.

This is it, guys. My Number One Earthworm Jim villain is evil given form. An immortal entity ruling over the planet of fire and brimstone, Heck. The furred Devil, dispenser of acid furballs. He is...

Number One: Evil the Cat

A diabolical being indeed. Evil the Cat is the supreme overlord of Planet Heck (a place full of lawyers, flames, and other evil stuff), where, with the help of a henchrat named Henchrat, he plots the destruction of the entire Universe. In order to destroy said universe, he often uses ancient artifacts of pure malice, such as tomes, snowglobes, and other things (in one case, a horrible song), which he uses to summon all-powerful gods of destruction.

The only person who's got what it takes to even try stopping him is, of course, Jim. And while Jim does succeed every time (or else the show would have ended pretty soon), it is always a "minor setback".

The planet Heck.

Evil was be the one who gave Peter Puppy (Jim's sidekick) his intelligence and evil side, merely out of cruelty ("the greatest of torments", he said it was).

"Get quart of milk — done. Return videos — done. Punish Henchrat — done. Go to dry cleaners — done. Destroy entire universe — hmm."

Never an embodiment of evil was as affable as Evil, though. There's some kind of rule, apparently, that dictates that all ancient artifacts of pure malice must to belong to Jim. That is not a problem for our mischievous Lord of Darkness - because everyone knows evil characters crossdress now and then.

Evil the Cat (in a cunning disguise): Contrary to my appearance I am not Evil the Cat in a cunning disguise.

This sentence here made my day. Heck (pun intended) - it made my life!

A word about Henchrat, before we proceed. He likes macrame, and thanks Evil everytime Evil punishes him for his stupidity. Also, he wears an armor made of cheese.

Hmm. This went quicker than I thought. Groovy. Back to Evil. He once fell in love (well, he fell in love twice during the course of the show. He fell in love with a beautiful cat, then discovered said cat was a dude in a costume) with the aptly named Malice the Dog, and together they were evily happy trying to destroy the Universe.

Oh, love.

In the end she got her own TV show, and had to leave Evil behind. You may pity the Devil-like abomination now...

In his free time, Evil enjoys worshiping at the altar of Doom (aka watching TV in an EVIL way) and reading books (in an EVIL way too).

What book? Why, The Da Vinci Code, of course! (ha, we all knew you thought I was going to say Twilight)

...and that's about it. The life of an embodiment of pure Evil isn't as interesting as they say. Oh, and he's voiced by Edward Hibbert - Gil from Frasier (and I think he played Zazu in the Lion King, too, I'm not sure. Wikipedia didn't help). That voice, it fits Evil perfectly.

And so this Top 6 comes to an end. Of course, this was only my opinion on the subject. All of Earthworm Jim 's (the cartoon show) villains are ineffectual, hilarious, and affable. I hope you enjoyed this Top 6 Week. And until next time.

PS: AND HAMMY!

EVIL THE INDEX