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I just read what must be the worst piece of literature I have ever experienced, and since it seems to contain all the faults I can think of, and a few I did not know existed, I figured I'd post this:

1:

A story generally has a beginning, a middle and an end.

The beginning has setting, characters and plot.

The middle has the characters furthering the plot in the setting.

I guess H.B. Halicki got bored six years after he made himself heaps of money from his opus magnum, Gone in 60 seconds, so he decided to make another one.

The junkman is far stupider and worse in every way than the original Gone in 60 seconds.  The plot makes no sense, and is obviously just an excuse for car chases.  The resolution is painful to watch.  So is the opening clip-art sequence, telling the story of the MC's life.

But then again, nobody asked for a plot.  Watch this more like a sketch comedy show, with one car-related gag after another for 90 minutes, and you'll like it.  If you're into that sort of thing.

This is the most car oriented movie ever made.  There's cars everywhere: on the road, in the fields, flying through the sky... everywhere.  American cars, European cars, Japanese cars... cars.  And boats and some aircraft.

The individual car chases have more plot to them than the movie in its entirety, and thanks to an abundance of bizarre stunts, are never boring.  Sure, not all of the stunts make any sort of sense, some seem to take place in some non-euclidian space I can't really get my head around, but they are amusing.

It appears that the whole Japanese animation philosophy is to just take any plot, regardless of content, and make a cartoon out of it.  This is not so, but it feels rather like it is at first.  Much of that stuff is like Gothic novels, it takes several episodes for the plot to start moving and get interesting.  Once you get past the fact that all the characters look like they could be subject to Mulder & Scully's investigations, you can watch that stuff for the weirdly interesting plot. 

After watching through several episodes of bug-eyed, green haired schoolgirls torturing each other to death with gardening implements, I decided it was time to try out something less sadistic.  Something with more realism to it.  What better than Maria-sama ga miteru? 

That show is completely non-murderous, and has a very regal, serious air about it.  And while all the figures are tall and thin, they do not look like barbie; and the Donald-Duck type uniforms they wear actually look like something parents might agree to allow their little girls to wear.  The main character has a weird hairdo that sort of makes her resemble a ram.  Not that it matters, just an observation.

There's a lot of panning up and down and to the side, probably to save money on animation, and the colours are a bit dull and the focus soft.  Sort of like viewed through vaseline.  The overall effect is like watching a close approximation of a good valium high.

Not to be confused with Blood +, or Blood the last vampire, a vastly superior work.

My version is 94 minutes, but IMDB has one at 122, which may have all the gore and titties which would maybe have made this feature worth while.

As it stands, it runs a lot like a very garden variety TV show, in the vein of One Tree Hill.  I did make it through the whole thing, but felt rather disappointed by the lack of gore.  The DVD cover promises gore.  This has about as much gore as One Tree Hill.

But anyway:

A woman gets turned into a vampyre, and a series of unremarkable, unmemorable events happen, for the most part.  Angst is involved.

So, Fadades is this French dude who perpetrates some real odd music.  It is really quite odd and not really for everybody, ... or anybody... pretty much, hearing his music by its lonesome would drive people off him and his whole ouvre real fast.

Which is a shame, because then you people don't  get to experience the true awesome genius of Fadades.  The music videos.  He began making just some picture shows, some with lyrics, then moved on to videos with him growling away in that funny wig of his, intercut with some videogame footage, which rather looks shot by means of putting the camera in front of the screen.

Then he got himself some better equipment.  Or he figured out how to use the chroma key.  Thenh things got quite good.  The other kind of good.

In "la fureur d'outre-tombe" Fadades is apparently constipated... or something.  He shakes his fist a lot, makes funny faces and does funny light-shows with his eyes.

In "la colère de Ramsès" Fadades makes some faces in Egypt.  It is hilarious.

One of the selling points on my old laptop PC was the editing program that went with it.

Of course it turned out to be buggy to the point that one could do three things at most before needing to save whatever one was doing to keep from losing the progress in the inevitable crash.

This thing crashed more than Aeroflot.

But after a while I did get the hang of using it, it did basic things.  Only had one soundtrack though, which explains some things.  The only real effects one can do are slow down and speed up.  Who wants to turn their film B&W?  Or Yellow?  Or have that acid trip effect?

Well, I ended up using them all, for the sake of using them.  The most mystifying effect is the one that scratches the film.  Like my video quality isn't wonky enough as it is.

Way back in the day some philosophers wondered if the world existed in the direction that you weren't looking.  You know the theory, it is basically the same that you held when you were 5 years old, believing that there might just be some goblins inside the refrigerator that came to be when the door was closed.  This also parallels with Shrödinger's cat.

But I am going too fast.

These guys held, that they themselves might just be the only conciousness in the universe, or anywhere, and everything that existed existed solely because they were looking at it.

Shrödinger's cat is alive and dead until you look at it - or it fades from existence meanwhile.  Quantum theory is like that.  But I'll get to that in a moment.

There is huge literature about how and why things exist only when looked at.  I figure these guys were drunk.  But anyway: finally they came upon a brilliant solution to their cunundrum, that beautifully solved how the world existed when no man was looking at it.

Plot: cook Seagal is on a train.  So are some terrorist blackmailers

But Seagal fixes them.  IN THE KITCHEN!

The Steven Seagal cliches: Steven Seagal whispers all his lines. Steven Seagal beats up some random thugs in a kitchen.  Seagals' perfect hair doesn't get untidied.  There's a knife fight.  A weird one.  Some mooks get killed in a far more horrible manner than the main villains.

The good: Race Bannon is in it.  It ends with a huge explosion.  The ending rather reminded me of Cassandra crossing, actually.  Not many dead moments in this.

Plot: cook Seagal is on a boat.  He can't believe he's on a boat.  Everybody looks at him because he's sailing on a boat.  Take a good hard look at the motherfucking boat.

The the boat gets hijacked by terrorists who want to steal all the diamonds... I mean missiles, for their own nefarious purposes.

But Seagal fixes them.  IN THE KITCHEN!

The Steven Seagal cliches: Steven Seagal whispers all his lines. Steven Seagal beats up some random thugs in a kitchen.  Seagals' perfect hair doesn't get untidied.

The good: Tommy Lee Jones is in it.  Gary Busey is in it.  They have some funny lines.  The film is never boring.  And Seagal doesn't get a chance to be as evil as so often before.

A while ago somebody recommended 1984, so I read it.

The contents of this book stay with one, since they are based on reality (no, really) and meant as a warning for people who like to put too much faith on government entities.

During the time since I read the book, certain things have been coming to my attention - or rather, brutally forced upon me.

In all detachable details, the book has nothing in it that's not doable.  But one thing does not seem to have occurred to Orwell, that plays a big part in the book, but in empirical reality, is unecessary.

The war.  The constant war, needed to keep people's minds occupied on some random enemy, and has the primary purpose to destroy exess produce.