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  Spongebob and Patrick are defintley not gay for each other. Alright gay jokes aside (I have nothing against the homosexuals) you're probably thinking:

  "ZGDK, what's up with all the Spongebob crap lately? I mean you just did a two part Top 20 list?"

  Well I figured that a review of the Spongebob movie would be a nice capper to the Top 20 list, or should I say crapper? Alright, alright I quit it with the bad puns. Honestly though, I have a lot to say about this movie, a lot. So sit back, relax, and enjoy the defintley not gay Spongebob Squarepants Movie Review. I promise I'll stop the gay jokes now.

  I loved the first three seasons of Spongebob. They combined a uniqe style of animation, some witty writing, and nice use of live action to provide an entertaining experience overall. The Spongebob movie was supposed to be the big conclusion to the series, but the executives (a.k.a. "The Man") at Nickelodeon decided they wanted more money. So Stephen Hillenberg (the creator), and some of his writers left the show, and it turned into a crapfest. The new episodes are horrible. Combine lazy writing and plots that are beginning to repeat themselves, with a different, more "cleaned up" style of animation, and a severe lack of live action scenes, and what do you get? Shit. Anyway, but this is the Spongebob movie we're discussing here. So let us dive right into this totally not gay movie.

SPOILERS FOR AN ANIMATED MOVIE BEGIN HERE!!!

  The basic plot of the movie is that Mr. Krabs our every greedy resteruanteer has opened up a second Krusty Krab right next to the first one, and it's called *LE GASP!* Krusty Krab 2. Spongebob thinks that he's a shoe in for the manager position, and that's where the movie begins...

  But first, some live action! With pirates! When the movie starts we see a pirate ship, one of the crew members has just found some tresure and he hops aboard with the chest. The crew gathers round as the capatin (Who sadly isn't Patchy the Pirate) opens the chest. What's inside? Tickets to The Spongebob Squarepants Movie of course! So the pirates storm the movie theater taking all of the front row seats, and the movie begins...

  We start off with a dream sequence of Spongebob as some badass manager who must go into the Krusty Krab, and correct a dangerous situation. The situation? No cheese on the patty. Of course Spongebob's joy is short lived, because he must wake up.

  So Spongebob is walking to work, and he bumps into Patrick who asks him if they're still on for the party at Goofy Goobers tonight (Again, defintley not gay). I just want to say I may sound like I'm ripping off That Guy with the gay jokes, and you know what I am! There's no such thing as originality anymore! Everyone steals from everyone! HA! HA! HA! So getting back to the movie Spongebob heads down to the grand opening, and... he doesn't get the job. Squidawrd does. Turns out Spongebob is "just a kid". Patrick then flies by with a flag up his ass, and then the two head to Goofy Goobers dissapointed.

  Meanwhile Plankton is pissed, he wants the Krabby Patty formula, and he's tried every plan from A-Y, but wait! What about Plan Z? Oh I'm laughing so hard-not funny. This is the main problem with the movie, the jokes are basically cracks about bald spots, missing plans, and such. Very few of the jokes have wit to them. Anyway moving on, Plankton has one last dastardly plan to try, that's oh so evil!

  Meanwhile back at Goofy Goobers we watch a musical number with bubbles floating everywhere, and then cut to the "Nut Bar" where Spongebob and Patrick are ordering sunday after sunday which is really a stand in for beer. They eat away the night, and then in the morning get quite drunk. Now I like this part here. It's clever, it's funny, and it's something both adults and kids can laugh at! I say we tally up all the funny, witty jokes in this movie! This is Funny Joke #1.

  Now we cut to King Neptune's castle, and boy is King Neptune an ass hole. His daughter Mindy on the other hand is not. She's compassionate, and according to Patrick very pretty. So make a long story short, Plankton steals the crown that covers the king's "thinning hair", and frames Mr. Krabs. Neptune freezes Mr. Krabs, and Spongebob and Patrick have a week to get it back from the dreaded Shell City. However the city is guarded by a Cyclops, a very evil Cyclops. So the pair starts driving in this thing:

  That's the best way I can explain the "Patty Wagon". Anyway they drive that thing, because apparently Spongebob doesn't need a lisence to drive a burger. The Patty Wagon itself is actually kind of funny and clever. Funny Joke #2. After an encounter with two ass hole gas station attendents, and some thugs they get the wagon stolen. Make a long story short there's no way they can make it to shell city on foot.

  Meanwhile back in Bikini Bottom, Plankton is selling Krabby Patties, and is giving away free Chum Bucket helmets which are really Mind Control Devices! Squidward tries to stop Plankton, but then Plankton activates the helmets, and begins to turn Bikini Bottom into hell! Bikini Bottom=hell. That's funny. Funny Joke #3.

  So Spongebob and Patrick find out that the keys to the Patty Wagon are in this thug tug. Did I mention that the duo is in a wasteland? Anyway they head in trying to get the key, but when they discover the bathroom bubble dispenser dispenses a crap load of bubbles they go crazy and fill the place with bubbles. The thugs don't think this is manly so the leader lines up all the patrons including Spongebob and Patrick, and plays the Goofy Goober song, after all now weenie can resist said song. Funny Joke #4. Hey there's more funny jokes than I thought! So the pair manages to escape, and they get the key.

  Meanwhile Plankton has hired a ruthless bounty hunter named Dennis to get rid of Spongebob and Patrick. More on that later.

  Anyway the wagon runs out of gas, and they must continue walking. Spongebob and Patrick encounter a trench full of monsters, and start questioning their sexuality-I mean their manliness, ahhh! It's all the same thing! Mindy shows up gives them kelp moustaches, and they now think that their men, and they sing "Now That We're Men" through the pit.

"Now That We're Men": http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HnFUtTWqSnE

  This scene is funny. Funny Joke #5. Anyway so they make it through the monster trench, and meet up with Dennis who crushes their manlyhood, by ripping off the moustaches, and crushing their happiness.

  However the pair overcomes their shortcomings and they make it to Shell City which is really a gift shop that sells dried out fish with google eyes and clothes, and the cyclops is really a diver that can't speak. I love the twist here, and it's some great use of live action as usual. This whole scene, it was hard not keep keep a straight face. Funny Joke #6. Just when all seems lost, Sponge and Pat are dried out, one last tear from the friends falls down turning into a heart then flows down the lamp plug, starting a fire and causing the sprinklers to turn on hydrating all the fish including Sponge and Pat. The fish in the shop don't take being dried out and turned into gifts well so they kick the shit out of the Cyclops.

  Spongebob and Patrick then meet up with David Hasslehoff who takes them back to Bikini Bottom. They also have a fight with Dennis aboard the Hasslehoff. This scene once again it's hard to keep a straight face. Funny Joke #7. The sheer insanity of it sums up this movie quite nicely.

  Spongebob and Patrick make it back to Bikini Bottom I mean hell, and destroy Plankton's mind control helmets with the power of rock! The Goofy Goober rock! Funny Joke #8. The rock also uses some nice claymation. The song itself is pure rock greatness. So in the end Spongebob and Patrick save the day, and everyone is saved.

  So in the end this is a great movie, and you know what? I guess there were loads of funny jokes. It's nicely animated, the voice talent is top notch, and it's just a fun film, and you know what? I think this movie teaches us just because two guys are very good friends doesn't mean they're gay, and it's okay to be a kid. In the end I give this film...

8 Funny Jokes/10

  All in all this is really a great film that provides some great entertainment, and it's great for helping pass the afternoon! Batman: Mystery of the Batwoman Review tommorow!