You know what's HORSE SHIT?!?!: Episode 1
You know what's HORSE SHIT?!?!: Episode 1
Posted by: Daffy in swearing, Rant, Piece of Shit, Life, Funny, Comments on
Aug 06, 2008
Horse shit: The excriment of a large, solid-hoofed, herbivorous quadruped.
That's what's horse shit....
I'm just kidding. This is a series not unlike Jame's Rolfe's "You know what's BULL SHIT?!" (In all honesty, I WAS gonna call this the same thing. But, I changed my mind in order to keep away from the piles of hate mail I'd probably get.)
So, now, I give you the first episode of "You know what's HORSE SHIT?!"
WARNING!!! This article contains a shit load of bad words. For those of you who cry at the drop of a hat, you might wanna back off now.
You know what's horse shit? Braces. What the fuck is the point of these things?
I mean, I know they're supposed to straighten your teeth. But do they really help? The answer is FUCK NO!!!! All they do is put a child in pain. Then, a few weeks later, when the kid is used to the pain, they go to the dentist and TIGHTEN THE FUCKERS!
And the dentist says, "It's for your own good. Don't you want nice, straight teeth when you grow up?" Sure. I'd LOVE that. But I've yet to see an adult who had braces when they were younger and STILL have straight teeth.
So, against the child's will, THEY PULL TEETH! Why? To make way for new teeth, of course!! WHY?! Aren't those teeth good enough for you, you ass. "But, taking these teeth out will make you look better later." Yeah. But it doesn't stop me from looking like a bad hockey player NOW. Not to mention the fact that my mouth is now FULLY FUCKING NUMB. Good job, you freakin duesch. At least it's numb for a little while. Then, after a day or two, you feel the pain. Then you think, "MY GOD, WHY?!?!"
Then, after a couple of weeks, you figure out what real pain is when they put on the braces. You just wanna punch the doc in the face. But, you can't 'cause you might get in trouble.
So, after almost FOUR YEARS of pain, torment, and misery, they FINALLY take off the shit. So, that's it, right? No more shit in my mouth. My teeth can finally be free, right? WRONG!!! They give you a DAMN RETAINER!!! Why? "So your teeth can stay straight." WHAT?! Weren't the fucking braces supposed to make sure my teeth stay straight forever? What the hell do I need to wear a damn retainer for?!
I, for one, think the whole thing is a conspiracy to keep a kid in pain and humiliated for as long as possible.
Braces suck and they're a steaming piece of HORSE SHIT!!!!
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written by Daffy , August 06, 2008
I kinda just wrote this on the fly. I didn't think about it like I usually do. I just wanted to rant and I thought you didn't have to think when you rant. Thanks for the advice, shingouken.
written by Tinaz12345 , August 06, 2008
This did make me feel better, so thanks for pointing it out to me. Even though it doesn't change anything about getting braces, the ranting does help set off some steam, doesn't it? Great, High School with Braces. I'm gonna hate this.
But for now, as I've already said, I feel good about my mouth. Even if there is four holes in the sides.
written by Daffy , August 06, 2008
To all who don't know, I know her. It's okay.
written by Tinaz12345 , August 06, 2008
written by Daffy , August 06, 2008
*Rubs arm while laughing* 
written by LordVonQuack , August 06, 2008
No need to apologise. I welcome any and all comments. I want to try to improve and I can't if I'm not told what to improve on.
Mind if I offer a few constructive criticisms then? Avoid using caps so often. I don't know if you've ever heard of the phrase that "Caps lock is cruise control for cool", but it's what I see reading these. Almost every other word is a profanity labeled off in huge letters. You can bring attention to important words without making them all uppercase. Italics, bold, or underline are there for that very reason actually.
See when I do this people understand I'm trying to emphasis a particular point without making it so mindnumbing clear that it becomes silly.
And I'm sorry to say I don't feel your pain. I never had braces, though I've had caps out the ass. I think... maybe 4 or 5? Regardless, they're not much better. I guess the only positive is you have gold teeth, but that just meant I couldn't smile downtown. I know what they'd do to ya. I saw Leprachaun: Back to Hood darnit!
written by Daffy , August 06, 2008
written by LordVonQuack , August 06, 2008
written by Daffy , August 06, 2008
written by ZGDK , August 06, 2008
written by lil_mizz_krazie , August 07, 2008
written by SuperSonicGoku , August 07, 2008
written by Daffy , August 07, 2008
And to SuperSonicGoku. I know, right?
written by Benneth , August 07, 2008
You know what else is bullshit? The radio. But that's another story.
written by lil_mizz_krazie , August 07, 2008
u haven`t been getting lots of hugs because Jeni`s been gone for a long time.
written by Daffy , August 07, 2008
written by Tinaz12345 , August 07, 2008
I'm waiting...
...
Forget it. *tackles you both and joins the hugs*
written by lil_mizz_krazie , August 07, 2008
GROUP HUG! yay!
written by lil_mizz_krazie , August 07, 2008
written by Daffy , August 07, 2008
I don't know where Jeni went.
written by lil_mizz_krazie , August 07, 2008
i don't think anyone noes what happened to Nita or Jeni.
written by Tinaz12345 , August 07, 2008
written by Daffy , August 07, 2008
written by Tinaz12345 , August 08, 2008
written by Daffy , August 08, 2008
written by Tinaz12345 , August 08, 2008
written by SuperSonicGoku , August 20, 2008
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Besides the topic in question, and of course the unoriginal idea, this has some nice potential (I don't mean to sound condescending and i apologise) Besides, i'm not one to talk after having posted some rather unoriginal things myself.