Reader's Choice:
Top 10 Women in Games

AAACK!!

    That was the sound I made when I looked in my message box and saw how many votes I got when I called you all out in my Women in Games article. It seems I'm not the only one sick and tired of large breasted, tiny waisted almost-hookers running around acting like a vapid cheerleader with a sword (no offense to actual cheerleaders). Many of you who read my article loved it, and some of you who read it swore unholy death upon me for omitting some characters from my list, including one fellow who threatened to tie me to a chair and force feed me petroleum. (Editor's Note: Please don't threaten the talent. The Admin is fond of them for some reason).

    I have to say though, its encouraging to get so many responses, if for no other reason that a good bit of you are so well spoken, that a couple of you almost wrote the individual entries yourselves, and since this is a Reader's Choice column, I've taken some of the best written entries and incorporated them into the article. So, for those of you who got quoted, you may now count yourselves among the TGWTG Illuminati. (Membership in same requires you to send $500 in small unmarked bills to me every week. I'll expect the first installment in May!) I did take the liberty of correcting spelling and grammar errors, especially for that one prick who wrote to me entirely in l33t-speak. (Don't do that shit again!!)

    Because I've assembled this list from YOUR votes, you all have nobody to blame except each other if someone you like doesn't show up. :P Right, that said, let's have a look!

10.Faith (Mirror's Edge)

    I must confess, Faith actually almost made the initial list, but I felt that there wasn't of a connection between the player and the character to earn a spot, but evidently, she gets away with that by compensating for being, as one of you wrote “athletic and strong without being intimidating and masculine. She has a quiet strength that adds to her character without overpowering it.” (I don't know who said that to me, since they sent it to me over skype and I didn't save the contact info, so if you know who you are, send me a PM through the website and I'll give due credit.) Upon closer inspection (i.e. ganking my friend's 360 and playing through the game) I have to say that I agree. It's also nice that we have a protagonist who's Asian without being so drenched in stereotype and anime subculture that we spend the whole game wondering where the tentacles are.

9.Chris Lightfellow (Suikoden III)

    Now, I have to confess (at the risk of being stoned to death in the street) that I've never played any of the Suikoden games, and so I don't know anything about this character. Thankfully, a reader named Danakir knew enough to tell me all about it, so I'll refer you to him:

     The daughter of a proud knight of the Zexen Federation, she lost her father soon in life. Despite that, wanting to make him proud, she decided to join the Knights, of course that wasn't easy as there aren't exactly many women in the military of Zexen.
And yet despite all those obstacles she managed to rise up and above the call of duty and, earning the respect of her men, become the leader of the Knights of Zexen and the hero of her country as the Silver Maiden.
    Plus she goes to battle in complete full plate instead of that chainmail bikini bullcrap. =P Her whole side of the story revolves around her honor as a knight versus her sense of morality as a human being as she's torn between her father's legacy and the political machinations of her direct superiors.
    She's deep, serious, thoughtful, strong and incredibly compelling and she makes you wish that you could serve under her. That, to me, is the sign of a great female character, both for achieving a position of significant authority and keeping to a fighting style that is realistic for a knight. -Danakir

Well, alright then!

8.Jill Valentine

    I caught a bit of flack for not including her on the list, but you spoke up and now I can only bow to your wishes!
    Jill Valentine has the distinction of being the heroine of an action game without being an overbearing bad-ass action girl. In RE1 she is thrown into a situation she has no experience dealing with, and yet manages to come out in the end through use of her wits, instincts and a fair amount of firepower. In an twist of “Soylent Green is People” irony, I actually cut her from the first list because I felt she was oversexualized in RE3, but the majority of the votes I got for her claim that she was actually better portrayed in Nemesis than the original, as Krystlemonster wrote: “She needs to be on this list because she is a real woman and acts like a real woman. Fighting zombies is hard work, she takes it like a trooper. If I had to shoot of the undead [in real life] I don't know what would become of my sanity. Shotguns are heavy, and a bazooka or a magnum, lol, like I could carry that? Somehow she keeps it together and trudges forward through the game all along fighting on her own.”

    Well, I'm man enough to admit when I'm wrong, and I made an error of judgement here. Jill Valentine takes your number 8.

7.Zoe Castillo (Dreamfall: The Longest Journey)

    Zoe didn't make the initial list because I didn't think enough people had played Dreamfall to know who the hell I was babbling on about, but all that was put to rest when I counted no less than 30 messages asking, nay, DEMANDING that I place her in the article. For those of you who voted for her, you've obviously played the game and I commend you for supporting a good franchise. Those of you who haven't GET THEE TO A GAMESTORE NOW AND BUY IT. Now that I've finished ranting, sadly, nobody went on at length about her, so I have to get off my lazy bum and write it myself. :P
    Zoe is about as real a girl as you can get without having to leave your couch. She's a college dropout, who doesn't know what she wants to do with her life, and is solely concerned with hanging out with friends, buying new cell phone apps, and generally trying to figure out who she is. And then suddenly she's trying to find her missing boyfriend, getting entangled in a government conspiracy and being literally thrown into another dimension and she has absolutely no clue what's going on. She is Alice in Wonderland if Alice was sponsored by Verizon. Once again, she's also ethnic (middle-eastern) without being stereotyped, and while the game shows she's pretty inept at combat (thought that could just be poorly designed combat controlls) she is shown to be an intuitive thinker and more than capable of messing about with technology in a competent fashion.

    I was actually a little surprised that the protagonist from the original Longest Journey, April Ryan, didn't get any votes, but then I looked at the sales figures for Longest Journey and realized that nobody fucking bought THAT game either. >.< Please remedy this as soon as possible.

6.Alys Brangwin (Phantasy Star IV)

Yes, this is the best picture of Alys I could find. Sue me.

    Ok, I admit, I'm actually a bit ashamed that Alys didn't make the first list. Truth be told, I'd forgotten all about her, but the 72 votes I got for her set me straight. Reader “Demon” (scary name, dude) writes “She is one of the most skilled monster-hunters on her planet, and is recognized worldwide, even in more secluded areas. She adopts the slightly weaker Chaz off the street, and makes him her protege, during the game, and sticks out in my mind as one of the coolest game characters I've ever come across. She is also very brave and very strong willed. I also thought she was the main character for the majority of the game, until she died.“ Yes, Alys beat Aeris to the “tearful death” punch by a good four years. It was a plot twist that nobody really saw coming. Especially since, as Demon points out, the game treated her like the main character for a good portion of the game. Her adoption of Chaz shows that she does have a compassionate and caring soul, and she's also more than capable of throwing down with the big boys.

...Just don't try and sell her measurements to anyone. I'm just sayin'.

5.Lucia (Lunar: Eternal Blue)

    And we reach one of the big surprises of this article. I got quite a few votes for Eternal Blue's blue haired, clueless alien/goddess. Lucia arrives on Lunar from the Blue Star not knowing anything about human culture or even figures of speech (of particular note is her total confusion when she learns what a lullaby is). Despite this though, she is never shown as being stupid or airheaded, but maintains a kind of childlike innocence. Her growth from near mechanical obsession with her mission (I must see the goddess Althena NAO!!!) to growing to care for her friends and teammates, and developing a romance with the hero, Hiro (see what I did there?) is one of the most compelling and emotional character arcs in gaming history. Reader Hakumei (another skype message. How are you people FINDING ME?!) wrote: “Lucia is the woman that every man wants to fall in love with. She's beautiful without inspiring lust, innocent without being weak, and has a heart filled with kindness.” Couldn't have said it better myself. I'm actually REALLY happy that Lucia got so many shout outs! The Lunar series has always been one that's been under appreciated!

And even I have to admit, the playable after-game epilogue where Hiro journeys to the Blue Star just to be with Lucia is pretty damn romantic! (OOH!! Dr. Gonzo has a SOUL!!)

4.Joanna Dark. (Perfect Dark)

Holy hell, I caught a lot of flack for this one! From cries of “blasphemer”, “heretic”, hell, one of you even threatened to kill my kitten! This is unusual for many reasons, not the least of which being that I don't even own a cat. o.O

Joanna Dark made her debut in the N64 smash, Perfect Dark, which was a spiritual sequel of sorts to Goldenye 007. Joanna manages to take the image of a female super-spy and make it work without reliance on gratuitous T&A to get the job done. Add in her own dark past (no pun intended) and we have an FPS character with a surprising amount of development and personality. Joanna Dark hasn't been seen since Perfect Dark Zero on the 360, which is a shame, since Joanna really is a character who deserves more attention. User Serraph105 said “Joanna was totally badass.” and I don't think I can argue with that.

Now, whoever's poor kitty that is you're about to kill, please put him down. I don't think the owner will be happy with me that their cat was killed because of a web article.

3.Aya Brea (Parasite Eve)

Another surprise entry!

Aya is an NYPD officer who twice must contend with her own genetic weirdness. Throughout both games, she's portrayed as a realistic cop, as well as being one of the few game characters shown to have an actual LIFE outside of the events of the game (the first game opens with her going on a date to the opera). Parasite Eve is what you would get if Resident Evil met the first half of Law & Order. Despite being in a situation that, last I checked, isn't covered at the police academy, Aya manages to keep a cool head and doesn't lose her sensibilities, despite the fact that giant mutated rats keep trying to use her buttocks as chew toys. Once again, really glad she got a lot of votes. Your assignment is now to get as many people as you can to play this game!

2.Bastila Shan (Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic)

A number of KOTOR characters got a good number of votes, but Bastila squeaked by by just one vote (105 to Kreia's 104) and that number is justly deserved. She's a young Jedi knight who possesses a rare skill (Battle Meditation, if you're asking), which places her in a position of significant pressure within the Jedi order. She confronted and overpowered the Sith Lord Revan, only to be rescued by a memory wiped Revan. And while she travels with her mind-wiped former foe, she watches him relearn all that he lost, and (depending on how you play, and if you're a man or not) actually falls in love with her former enemy. She also tries to strictly adhere to the Jedi Code (There is no emotion yaddayaddayadda), but her own experiences and feelings lead her to question the wisdom of the jedi, and eventually turn to the dark side. And again, depending on how you play, she is either redeemed, or stricken down by the very man/woman who's trying to save her. She's also quite skilled with a lightsaber, as well as having an almost serene connection to the Force. She's also not above having a little fun at Mission Vao's expense. (Keep Bastila and Mission in your team while you're still on Taris, you'll see what I mean.)

Alright, now, here's where I have to cheat. I know I said that you could vote for any female character, even ones that made the first list. And while some did snatch a few votes here and there, there was one in particular who a whopping 237 of you thought belonged on the number one slot. And I would have been happy to oblige, except for one thing. Samus is already there. And while I'm all in favor of taking the lazy way out, when it comes to something like this, I feel I have to be a little more professional than that. So Samus gets an honorable mention, instead. But since some of you were so vocal, here's a smattering of voting voices.

“Samus is definitely my favorite“-darthnazgul

“Samus is just the #1 female in gaming without a doubt! Beautiful, yet deadly and unstoppable!” -Clank Bot

“I have to say that Samus sort of owns that spot...FOREVA”-slowdeath93

“I LOVE SAMUS!! She's my hero!” -Overactor

Now, as much as I regret not having Samus as No.1, it should be noted that the next top vote getter came very close at 226 votes, as well as an equally, if not MORE vocal fanbase.

Ladies and Gents, your no.1 Woman in Gaming is:

1.Heather Mason (Silent Hill 3)

Now, I AM going to take the lazy way out, since you all pretty much say it better yourselves.

“The past two games had adult male protagonists but the third game switched
things up in that it featured a young female protagonist. Some would argue that
Heather was whiny and freaked out a lot, but I would argue that her reactions
were the most realistic out of all of the series's protagonists”-RedCoyote

“Heather seems somewhat spoiled at first, buy slowly overcomes that vapid visage and take the fears of the present situation and the fears of her past and kicks ass. Her in-game character swings and drags a crowbar like a woman would, slashes like a woman would and her reactions are exactly the same as mine would have been. Like, WTF is going on?..What's that noise?...WTF is that thing grinding toward me in the dim light, screaming radio noise in my direction...” -Krystlemonster

“She is being hunted down by a cult member who had her father killed, and instead of whining about it, she takes the fight to the cult, ultimately rejecting giving birth to a god, and, to conclude the game, fighting and killing the new god. That's right: a woman who puts up with Silent Hill, and kills god.” -Lotus Prince

“This girl has been through some shit that would drive any other person insane. She starts getting attacked by monsters, the shopping mall she was in turns into the Otherworld and her daddy is murdered by some beastly monstrousity. Talk about traumatic. Yet Heather still manages to push past all this and the fact that she's the reincarnation of a demi-god but she goes to the end and kills a God herself. Pretty good for a normal girl I'd say XD” -Lost Mercernary

And that concludes our first Reader's Choice column. Thanks again to everyone who voted! This one was well received enough that I think I'll make this a monthly thing! If you'd like to see more Reader's Choice stuff, sound off! Until next time *makes Sign of The Konami Code* Keep your controller charged!

Honorable mentions go to all of the following women characters, some of which I'm honestly surprised didn't get higher votes.

In no particular order:

Tifa (Final Fantasy 7)
Aeris (Final Fantasy 7. Yes, believe it or not, both of the FF7 vixens were beaten out of the race! O.O )
Celes (Final Fantasy 6)
Chun-li (Street Fighter)
BloodRayne (do I really need to spell it out for you?)
Mio and Mayu (Fatal Frame II)
Rei Kurosawa (Fatal Frame III)
Princess Zelda
Jaina Proudmoore (Warcraft 3)
Shodan (System Shock)
Glados (Portal)
Yuna (Final Fantasy x-2)
Sophitia (Soul Calibur)
Cammy (Street Fighter)
Carmen Sandiego ( I know, I was surprised too.)
Alis Landale (Phantasy Star)
Kreia (KOTOR 2)
Shanoa (Castlevania: Order of Ecclesia)
Claire Redfield (Resident Evil 2)
Sherry Birkin (Resident Evil 2)
Lili Zanotto (Psychonauts)
Naomi Hunter (Metal Gear Solid 4)
Cate Archer (No One Lives Forever)
Konoko (Oni)